Chapter Sixty-Five
I allowed my towel to fall as I leaned into the shower to adjust the stream of water flowing from the showerhead into the porcelain tub.
I looked up in irritation as the doorbell rang and the sound vibrated throughout the house. Wrapping my towel around myself again, I walked to the window, yanked it open and peered straight down.
"Mark!" I yelled. I saw his blonde head look around before looking up, meeting eyes with me and waving.
"What're you doing?" he called.
"I'm just about to hop in the shower. Um, come inside and relax, I'll be out in ten minutes," I promised, heading back toward the shower.
He made me jump a foot when I arrived back, dripping in water. I'd expected him to relax in the kitchen or outside on the patio, but he'd chosen to drop down onto our bed, and was pursuing one of my paperback novels.
I blushed when his eyes swept over me, taking in my loose, wet hair, my slick body and the white towel wrapped semi-decently around me.
"Hey, Mark," I said, blushing.
"Hey Cal. Sorry to intrude," he said. I inwardly winced as I heard him call me 'Cal'-few did it. Mostly only Lauren and Sawyer, Sawyer most of all. It was all wrong to hear it from his lips.
He got off my bed as I dropped onto it, running a hand through my hair, straight and smooth from my shower.
"So, do you have your science stuff?" I asked, when conversation lagged.
"Huh?" he said, looking surprised.
"Chem lab. Why you're here, remember?" I said, laughing.
"Right. Uh, downstairs, in my bag," he said.
"You didn't think to bring it upstairs?" I said, surprised.
"Guess not," he said, shrugging.
"Well, you should go get it," I suggested. "I have to dry off, anyway."
"I'd rather stay," he admitted. I raised an eyebrow, but was distracted when my hand, roaming the bedsheets, met a rumple. I felt around, and was surprised to unearth one of my bras-a black lacy one. Mark looked at it, and I detected a look of slight alarm. My eyes darted to my underwear door, open slightly. I looked back at Mark in shock.
"Did you go through my underwear?" I demanded. He looked at me, and the garment in my hands. Instead of answering, he reached behind him and turned the lock on the doorknob.
My body tensed as he began to move toward me. I slowly stood, to make my way casually toward the door, but he moved to a run and threw me back on the bed. I screamed, suddenly aware of what his intentions where.
Before I could think, before I could plan, he was holding my wrists in one hand, above my head. I writhed, tried to kick him, bite him, but he wouldn't release his strong grip.
"Sawyer!" I screamed in agony, very aware of the thick walls, the empty community, my husband so far away. He'd promised to protect me…
As the name ripped from my lips, Mark brought back his hand and slapped my hard across the face. I whimpered in sudden fear, knowing it wasn't about to stop. Knowing that Sawyer wasn't going to come home, that no one could or would come. There were two locked doors between myself and the world that could protect me. Two locked doors and a strong man in the state of desire.
"Stop it, I'm married," I whimpered. "I thought we were friends."
He began to fumble with his pants zipper. Never had I been so open, with the white towel that I couldn't reach with my hands so immobile.
Mark frowned as my words hit him, and he pinned down my right hand with his arm to access my left. Looking me in the eye, he wrenched my diamond off my finger and threw it across the room. I screamed again.
I tried to turn my body away from him, desperate in my last attempt, but he'd managed to rid himself of his jeans one-handedly. He pulled off his boxers and I caught a glimpse of his hardened penis. I winced and looked away-this was all so wrong.
I screamed one last time as he thrust himself roughly inside of me before I began to moan in pain.
"You like that?" he asked, mistaking my moans.
"No, no, no…" I whispered. I braced myself for another hit that didn't come.
He thrusted twice more, I felt wetness drip down my legs, and suddenly it was over. He released my wrists, climbed off of me and made to find his pants. Slowly the event came back to me and I began to cry.
"What's wrong?" he asked, unperturbed.
"What's wrong? What the fuck do you think is wrong, asshole?" I said, shuddering and pulling my towel tightly across me.
"I only did it because I love you," he said, shrugging.
"God! I'm married! I don't love you! I didn't even want you!" I said.
"Married? Don't see your ring. And if you're really married, you'd tell him all about this. But you're just too afraid to," he said.
"I thought you were my friend," I said.
"There was always more to it," he said. Swooping down, he took my face in his hands and kissed me roughly, forcing his tongue into the confines of my mouth. I batted his hands away as they moved to touch me, and managed to fight him off me.
"I'm telling him tonight," I swore, a fresh wave of tears breaking through me.
"He never has to know. And he won't be back until tomorrow. So I'll see you then," he said, smirking. With a slight, curt, nod he left.
I ran back into the shower and began to scrub soap furiously across my bruised body. I let the water stream over me until it grew cold, and still I didn't move. I feel as if his hands are still on me, his smell is all around me, as he did forbidden things only one man had ever done to me.
I bit back a scream as the door downstairs banged open, but relaxed when the familiar footsteps pounded up the stairs. I hurriedly hopped out, put on a towel and ran into the hall.
"Hey," I said softly.
"Hey Callie, are you okay? You looked flushed," he said in concern.
"I'm good. Why are you back already?" I asked.
"Why, expecting someone else? Uh, Taylor and Mom got in a fight so we came home," he said, laughing. I shuddered as he put his arms around me and my mind immediately flew to the hands holding my wrists, the strong weight atop me…
We walked to the bedroom. I forced myself not to break away from his arm, possessively guiding me. His hand slapped my cheek and went back to my shoulder, pinning me down…
I began to go sit on the bed, but suddenly a terror struck me of what it could mean. I set a new course, this time for the chair in the corner, and sat down carefully in it.
"You'll always keep me safe, right?" I said suddenly. He turned away from the bureau and looked at me in surprise.
"Yeah, of course. Are you sure you're okay?" he asked in concern. He'd failed once. He could again.
The phone rang as Sawyer seemingly spotted something on the ground and bent down to pick it up.
"Hello, Calista Scott? We're calling in concern for Jennifer Jagielski," said a confident, brisk nurse.
"My big sister. Is she alright?" I asked anxiously.
"She's awake. She's asking for you," said the nurse. I grinned.
"That's so great. So, so great. Tell Jenny we'll be right there," I squealed. I met Sawyer's eyes and grinned. He ran to me and swooped me up in his arms, twirling me twice before setting me down and crushing me against him. His body was so heavy against mine that I was completely immobile…
"That's so great. Uh, this was on the ground over there," he said, opening his fist to reveal my beautiful square diamond. I nodded.
"Um, it fell off, I've been looking everywhere," I lied easily. He took my hand in his, and as he slid it back onto my ring finger I saw his eyes promise all the same thing he'd promised when we'd first married.
"This is the best day ever," he said. I nodded fakely as he squeezed the hand that again bore the diamond.
Never, in all my years of loving him and being loved, had I felt so completely unworthy of his love.
