Author: Cry Tears of Darkness
Setting: This pertains to the episode where Rory comes back from Washington and has trouble deciding between Jess and Dean. Starts when she is still in Washington though.
Disclaimer: As always, I do not own any of these characters, unless I make one up that's not in the show but I don't know yet about that. They belong to the WB and all. Oh well. I wouldn't mind owning Dean though.
Rory's Point of View
"Rory!" Screamed Paris as she ran into the room in a panic. "Where are you? We need to prepaire for this debate and we need to prepaire now, there is no time to write little letters to you little boyfriend now," she said as she saw my binder opened on the table.
"I'm not writing to my boyfriend, Paris," I replied and tried to close the binder before she could get close enough to read what was already printed. I didn't want her to see that I was writing to Jess and not Dean.
"Then who except your perfect Dean?" She questioned me. I closed the binder but she grabbed it from me before I could put it away. She opened it, and I could feel my heart beating a million miles per hour.
"Oh, there's nothing in here. Then what were you doing?" She asked, confused. At least she didn't find the paper that I had written on.
"Oh, just nothing. I was going to write to Dean, but I was lost for words." I replied in a hushed voice.
"How could you not know what to say to him? I mean he only wrote you twenty-five letters in the past five week, Rory! What is going on?" She interogated.
"Nothing's going on. I just think he's coming on too strong. I need my space you know."
"You need your space? Oh well excuse me then, I'll just go prepaire for this debate all on my own then over ther ein the corner since I'm invading your personal space Rory Gilmour!" And she stomped off and slammed the door in the process.
Once she had left I picked up my binder from the bed she had thrown it on and re-opened it to my Jess letter. So far I didn't have much at all. I didn't know what to say to him either. What do you say to a guy you develop feelings for when you already have a boyfriend whom you love with all of your heart? What do you say to your boyfriend whom you love with all your heart about a guy he hates but yet you have strong feelings for? It's so complicated.
The phone rang, "Hello?" I answered. A deep male voice appeared on the other line.
"Hello Rory Gimour." He voice replied.
"Who is this?" I asked, a bit unsure.
"Who do you think I am?" The voice replied to her again.
"Jess? Is that you?" I asked, I mean, it must be Jess. Dean would never… Or would he?
"Jess? You think I'm Jess? Rory! Come on!" Dean's voice blarred through the phone. Oh no, I had made a mistake.
"I'm sorry Dean, but you don't come across as a person who would disguise their voice and call me while I'm in Washington, especially with Paris around." I tried to defend myself.
"Rory, you gave Jess the number to call you? What's the deal, why don't you return my letters anymore?" He sounded so hurt. What do I say to that?
"Well, Dean, I don't know what to write to you. So many letters you've sent me and so much to reply to with so little time."
"I know you're busy, but I'm sure you've written Jess a letter haven't you? He seems to be the only thing on your mind these days isn't he?"
"Dean that's not true! You know me, you know me…" I replied and still stared at the looseleaf laying infront of me with a long letter to Jess ready to mail.
"I thoguht I knew you. I used to know you. Rory, why are you acting like this? It's as if you don't want to be around me anymore. Do you want to date Jess or something?"
"You really don't hold anything back do you?" I asked in return.
"Answer the question, Rory." He said sternly. Almost as if he was fighting back tears as he did when she didn't say 'I love you' back on their three-month annaversary.
"No, I don't want to date Jess." I said as quick as possible. I couldn't loose Dean. Not like this. But the thoughts had definitely crossed her mind.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes I'm sure. Dean, I love you." I said. It wasn't really a lie. I did love him. But I did think of dating Jess. Dean didn't need to know that though.
"Well, in that case I'm glad. I love you so much Rory and I miss you too. I can't wait for you to get home and we can be together again. It's been so long."
"I know, me too." I said. I felt so guilty.
"Okay, well, I guess I should go. I can hear Paris coming in the background."
"You can? Oh, well you're right. I guess so."
"I love you Rory" Dean said.
"Bye." And I hung up the phone. I looked down at my letter to Jess and I re-read it before I stuffed it into an enveloppe and adressed it. Dean would never know that I've been sending letters to Jess. How would he know?
"RORY GILMOUR LET"S GET WORKING NOW!" Screamed out Paris on her way back to their room. I guess Dean maybe knew she was coming afterall.
"Yes, Paris."
Dean's Point of ViewThere is something going on with Rory. She didn't say I love you back. She didn't seem all that sure that she wants to be with me either. There is something fishy going on. But what? Why doesn't she like me anymore? I mean, I'd give her the world. And she, doesn't want it?
"I need to walk." I said out loud. I gathered up my things and cleaned my room quickly before grabbing my jacket and going down staires. I went outside and walked towards Luke's.
"Dean! Hey, how are you doing?" I heard behind me. I turned around and saw Loralai walkign towards me. Nice to hear a familiar and friendly voice.
"Hey, I'm doing good. How about you?" I asked in return. At least she appriciated what I do for Rory even though Rory doesn't seem to.
"I'm a little coffee deprived but when am I ever not coffee deprived, coffee in the morning is a good thing, good thing. Yes yes, off to Luke's. Luke gives me coffee. Where are you off to?" She replied. I've gotten used to the face paced and yet repetative talk of the Gimour's by now.
"I'm just taking a walk to clear my head." I answered. No use trying to cover, she'll see right through me. She's always an excellent judge like that.
"About, something wrong Dean?" She asked concerned.
"Maybe. I don't know. It's Rory. It's as if she doesn't want to be with me anymore. She always seems to be focused on Jess now." I confessed. "It feels as if she doesn't love me anymore. And that creep is stealing her away from me."
"Dean, Rory loves you. Jess is just, excitement for this small town. She loves you." She tried to comfort me.
"I guess, but, I mean I know, but, it doesn't seem like it." I said.
"That's because she probably has feelings for another guy!" Jess's voice creeped up in the background.
"What do you want?" I answered coldly.
"Well, I am the devil sent to tell you that your beautiful Rory does have feelings for another guy. Just to set your records straight." He answered.
"Like who?"
"Like me. You've known it all along. Don't fight it." He said cooly.
"Prove it." I demanded.
"Come on guys. There's no need…" Loralai was cut off.
"Ok, come inside, I'll show you the letters she's been sending me saying 'Oh Jess I like you but what about Dean' type things. Come on, that is, unless you don't want to know." He teased.
"Lead." I followed him into Luke's and past Luke who looked, as always, grumpy. "Where are these letters Jess?" I asked impatiently.
There was no way it could be true. I mean, in my head yes, but not in real life. Rory, sending letters to Jess, after she had told me she hadn't and that she loved me? What is going on. There is no possible way that…
