Grace peered out her window- all she could see was a white sheet covering over her small backyard; it looked as though a heavy snow storm had just blown in and covered everything………but it was only a stretched white canvas type sheet, with four poles at either corner, and a few more inside the tent to hold it up, an exact replica of the tent her mother had built for her wedding to Rick.

Grace gave a faint smile, as she saw small, flickering lights come alive inside the tent- staining the white canvas with a yellow circle, and as more candles were lit by her mother and Aunt Judy, who were under the tent, more yellow circles spread across the canvas.

Light was slowly fading in the sky, and darkness was surely falling; there was a warm wisp of wind in the air, but not much else……… The night would be cool, but not too cold, just comfortable enough to dance until late hours without getting hot and bothered.

Grace's smiled grew as she turned away from the window and caught a glimpse of herself in her bedroom mirror- her dress was mint coloured, and was a two piece with scattered beaded flowers on the corset top.

The skirt fanned out slightly, but not very much, and the material bunched neatly to one side, lifting it up slightly; it settled nicely against her stomach, and hugged her hips in all the right places.

She picked up her white lace shawl that was hanging on the back of her chair; draping it over her shoulders- it gave the dress a perfect finish.

She turned around, and examined the back, her bare shoulders visible through the light shawl- she smiled, and turned face on again, examining her hair, which she had curled, and fell nicely across her shoulders- she was glad she'd aloud it to grow longer.

She wore little make up, only mascara, a smudge of blush and soft pink lipstick. Perfect.


Jessie sat, hunched at the edge of her bed- refusing to look at herself in the mirror where her reflection was screaming back at her.

She no longer liked the colour of the blood red dress, thinking it was too gaudy and inappropriate. She didn't even like the silk material anymore- it was too cold to wear such a light fabric, and it rubbed against her inner thighs when she walked.

She thought the dress was too slinky, and she didn't like how it fell straight down her gawky, thin body- it showed that she had no boobs, and a straight-down pencil figure, with no curvaceous hips.

And she wished it wasn't strapless- revealing her skeletal upper body- her bones poking out so obviously, and ugly.

She sighed, and, against her will, lifted her head and stared at herself, hunched over with a deep frown.

Her hair was clipped in a bun with one of Grace's silver barrerts, and she had no make-up on, and no intention of wearing any- even though her eyes were red and puffy from the secret crying she'd been doing over the course of the day, she didn't care how she looked.

She wasn't trying to impress anyone.

She stood up, awkwardly, as she hadn't quite mastered how to walk in her high heels.

It was 7:30, people would be arriving anytime now………..her mother and Henry were downstairs, helping to prepare the food; Lily, Judy and Rick were putting the final touches inside the tent; Eli and his band mates (Josh and Lucas) were getting their gear set up. And Grace and Zoe were doing the same as Jessie- getting ready.

Everyone would be here soon…………..except for the one person that really matters.

Jessie turned and glanced at her phone, sitting on the table beside her bed.

Without even realizing it, she'd moved towards her bedside table, picked her phone up, and started dialling that number she knew off by heart.

"Hello?"

Katie's voice shocked her; she had never expected her to answer. And she sounded about as bad as Jessie felt- her voice was low and strained- as though she'd just been crying.

"Hello?" Katie asked again.

"Katie- It's me……….Jessie………..please don't hang up, and don't say anything………..just listen…………."

Silence proceeded Jessie's voice- she took that as a good sign.

"Look I'm sorry for hurting you………..for snapping at you when you just wanted me to be ok……….for being mad at you for knowing me so well…………but most of all I'm sorry for keeping you………..us……….a secret."

More silence- this was going well.

"You were right, I wasn't just upset about this birthday party that I don't want…………. I was upset because the people, who should know me best, don't………..because you're a part of me, and if they don't know about you, then they don't really know who I am………. Is this making sense?"

Jessie waited for an answer, and received a small, understanding mumble.

"Well, I am scared to tell them, and I'm not even sure why……….because I am so sure of how I feel about you, and that should give me the strength to pour the truth out to them, the truth about me, about us……….but I cant………and I don't know why………….because I desperately want to……….. I want my family to look at me the way you look at me……….."

Katie interrupted, "how?" she asked, and Jessie had to think for a moment.

When she opened her mouth again, she felt herself choke up, and she had to swallow back tears.

"Like they know me completely and totally………without me even having to say anything……….that's how you look at me……….just one look and you know my inner most thoughts and secrets……….and I love that……….. I love you………..and……….." she swallowed back those tears again before continuing.

"………and………..I want to see you………..I want to see you look at me that way……….that look that tells me everything is going to be ok because there's someone in this world who knows me, completely and totally……… I want you to not be mad at me anymore………..I want to kiss you, and run my hands through you're hair……….I just want to hold you………….but most of all……….I want to tell my family all of this……….just so they know……….." she swallowed again, and took a deep breath, "I want them to know how much you mean to me and how much I love you, completely and truly!"

Now, her tears started pouring out; she'd spoken the very words that had been pressing so hard against her heart.

And the only sound that came back was silence.

"Katie?" Jessie sniffed, taking small gulps in between tears.

"Mmm?" came the low murmur, signalling that she was still there, still listening.

"Did you hear me? I love you! And I want my family to know it!" Jessie blurted the words out hurriedly- desperate for Katie to hear her "I want the entire world to know it!" she added, quickly.

Silence continued to engulf Jessie, and finally, Katie spoke.

"I……….." she stopped for a moment, collecting herself; "I………just don't know if that's enough………." She mumbled.

Jessie stood, holding the phone to her ear, unable to say anything.

Those words had crushed her; in the hardest way; and their silence went on for what seemed like decades; choking both of them.

"Goodbye" Katie finally ended; and hung up.

JESSIE and………the saddest part is………it's my birthday………the birthday I don't even want………..


"You boys eating before the guests arrive?" Karen asked her son as he and two other young men; one with red curly hair and a freckly, white face, and the other with longish dusty blonde hair and tanned skin; walked into Lily's kitchen.

Eli looked up at his mother, who sat beside Henry at the kitchen bench, both with wine glasses in hand.

"Yep" he said, simply, and nodded with his head towards the finger food that was already set up- Josh, the red haired one, and Lucas, with blonde hair; greedily started picking up and stuffing the food into their mouths.

Henry and Karen exchanged an oh-how-charming look.

Eli, was the only one decked out in a suit- the other two were wearing baggy jeans and black shirts, half tucked into the jeans- and dark red neckties. It was all Eli could convince them to wear for his sister's formal party- they flat out refused to wear 'those goddam penguin suits'- as Lucas so diligently put it.

"Where's Jess?" Eli asked his mother, before she could open her mouth and remind Eli's band mates of their manners- completely embarrassing him.

"Upstairs, getting ready………where else?" she smiled.

Eli rolled his eyes and sighed, "Go figure………chicks take forever to get ready………"

"Tell me about it" Henry mumbled, lifting his wine glass to his lips.

Karen playfully shoved him in the side, "I was only an hour," she said, defensively.

Henry raised an eyebrow at Eli, and he smiled; "you got ready at 6:00 dear………" he replied, matter of factly.

Eli laughed, but decided to leave the room before his mother and Henry got into one of those lovey-dovey play fight things that ended with them kissing each other's noses.

"I'll go check on everyone," he said, exiting the kitchen- and by everyone, he meant Grace.

He needn't go far though, because as he approached the stairs, Grace was walking down.

He looked up- and had to remind himself to breath when he got a good look at her- a hip hugging, two piece mint dress, her hair curled and scattering across her shoulders, her chocolate eyes roamed his face; and smiled when they took in his full 'wowed' expression.

"Hey" she smiled, easily, standing infront of him at the last step.

"Hey" Eli replied- trying to remain calm even though his pulse was racing.

They stood like that for a moment, exploring each other's expression, and smiling easily.

"You look………." Eli searched for words, but when his brain wouldn't seem to function normally, he settled for an exasperated "wow", which made Grace giggle, and blush slightly.

"You don't look too bad yourself" she replied, looking him up and down- in his slick black suit, she reminded herself to breath.

They stood for a moment longer- forgetting to be awkward as they gaped at each another.

Finally, Grace averted her eyes and laughed, embarrassed as Eli stared into her face so intently- he snapped out of his trance, and held out his hand-, which Grace gladly took.

She took the last step, and stood beside him; "still wannabe my date?" she asked, in a small voice.

Eli looked down at her, and smiled, "definitely" he replied, confidently.

Just as they approached the kitchen, a blinding light flashed in their faces, and they had to squint their eyes.

"That'll turn out nicely!" Lily smiled back at them.

Eli and Grace laughed, but realised their hands as they walked out into the back yard.

Let the party begin!