The Courtship of Dogs and Men In Miniskirts.
Summary: Ed and Al meet another alchemist. Mustang is trying to woo Hawkeye, but everything keeps going wrong. And who's wearing a miniskirt and why?
Chapter 3: The Pants.
Responses to my reviewers are located at the end of the chapter.
Hello! ILoveMyGojyo here. Welcome to chapter three. Please read and review.
Disclaimer: I don't own Full Metal Alchemist or any of its characters.
The Fuhrer walked into his office, still trying to shake what he saw out of his head. He looked at his secretary and smiled.
"I'll be a bit busy this afternoon, do me a favor and hold my calls," he requested.
"Yes sir," his secretary nodded before looking back down at her paperwork.
The Fuhrer sat at his desk and got comfortable. He sighed as he looked at the large stack of papers. He shook his head before opening his desk drawer.
"What is this?" he asked as he pulled a pair of blue pants from the drawer. He had an odd expression on his face as he pulled yet another out, "I don't remember requesting my dry cleaning to be put in my desk," he said as he held up the pants to show his secretary. The secretary shrugged before looking back down at her work. "Hmm," he said as he laid one pair on his desk and looked at the tag in the other pair, "Ah, Jean Havoc," he groaned as he read the tag. He looked at the other pair, "Than these belong to Mustang," he said as he picked them up. He got up from his desk and walked into the hallway, "Armstrong," he said as the man pasted him.
Armstrong looked at him and saluted, "Sir," he said in his normal tone.
"Please return these to Lieutenant Havoc and Colonel Mustang," The Fuhrer requested as he handed Armstrong the pants.
Armstrong took the pants and nodded, "Yes sir," he said before turning and walking away, not the slightest bit curious.
"Something odd is going on," the Fuhrer said to himself as he rubbed his chin, "But, I'm not so sure I want to know what it is," he said shaking his head and returning to his office.
Ed groaned with irritation, "We could have you back in Resembool if you weren't so concerned about this girl," he said as they walked down the familiar alley.
Winry glared at him, "Well, I'll feel bad if we don't help her," she said as she hugged the jacket she bought the girl close to her chest, "Besides, I'll feel better when we give her this food and this jacket," she nodded.
The three rounded the corner and shock over took their faces. There were four boys in the alley and they were beating up the black haired girl.
"Hey!" Winry yelled at them.
They turned around and smirked at the blonde haired girl, "What do you want?" the leader asked irritably.
Winry's eyes got big, she didn't think past 'hey', "What are you doing to her?" she asked, as if it weren't obvious.
The boys waved a hand at her before looking back to the girl, "Leave her alone," Al said bitterly, crossing his arms over his chest.
The boys heard the voice of a little boy and laughed, "What are you gonna do about it little boy?" the leader asked before turning around. Al was standing in front of him, causing him to jump back a little, "Oh…crap," the boy said slowly before running off, his buddies following close behind.
"Well, do you always have that affect on people," the girl asked as she looked up at Al.
Al hung his head, "Most of the time," he answered simply, "But only when they don't get a chance to know me," he replied.
The girl smirked, "Yeah, I'm sure people are cutting in line to meet you," she said sarcastically. Al looked down at his hands before walking over to Winry and Ed. The girl looked at Winry and laughed, "You guys just can't help trying to be the heroes, can you?" she asked as she crossed her arms.
Winry's eyes widened when she saw what shape the girl's arm was in. Those boys had beaten her so much that her arm was barely hanging on.
"Um…Ed, I need to speak to you," Winry said as she turned around and handed Al the jacket, "Alone," she said, her eyebrows raised.
She pushed Ed around the corner, leaving the girl and Al alone.
"Umm, this is for you," Al said as he walked up to the girl and attempted to hand her the food they had bought.
The girl's eyes narrowed on him, "I'm not hungry," she said through her teeth.
"Oh," Al said nervously as he sat the food on a nearby trashcan, "I'll leave it there. If you do get hungry, you can eat it," he said before looking back down at her.
The girl shook her head in disbelief, "What's the jacket for, incase I get cold?" she asked bitterly.
Al looked at the jacket draped over his arm, "Yeah," he said as he laid it on the trashcan next to the food, "Um, I'm Al," he said as he placed a hand on his chest, "What's your name?"
The girl gave him an odd look, "Al?" she asked as she studied him better, "You mean…Alphonse and Edward Elric?" she asked unsure.
Al nodded, "That's me and my brother," he said excitedly.
"Well, if my leg didn't look as bad as my arm, I'd run," the girl said as she motioned to her, nearly severed, auto-mail leg.
Al gave her an odd look, "Why?" he asked confused.
"Because I just realized that there isn't a little boy inside that armor," she replied, a little fear in her voice.
"Oh," Al said as he looked down at himself again, "I'm sorry to frighten you. I'll be going now," he said as he turned to walk away.
"Allison," the girl said as she watched him walk.
Al looked at her confused, "Allison?" he asked, giving her an odd look.
The girl laughed a little, "My name is Allison, but you can call me Alley," she said as she motioned to herself.
Al was about to say something before Ed and Winry came back around the corner, "We've decided to take you with us," Winry said excitedly, a smile strewn across her face.
Alley looked at Ed and watched as he rubbed the back of his head, "You apparently had to convince him," she said, figuring Winry had hit him.
Winry blushed a bit, "Only a little," she assured her.
Alley shook her head, "I'm not going anywhere. So thanks, but no thanks," she said as she looked away.
Winry's smile faded, "But, your auto-mail needs to be repaired," she said nervously as she motioned to Alley's arm.
Alley groaned a little, "I'll be fine, just leave," she ordered, hoping they would listen this time.
"Alright," Winry nodded as she and Ed rounded the corner.
"Bye, Al," Alley said as she smiled at the young boy.
Al looked at her and nodded, "Bye," he said before following the others.
Al sat outside on the curb. He sighed as he looked around at the crowded street.
Ed walked out of the inn, stretching his arms high above his head, "Good morning," he said as he sat down next to Al.
"Good morning brother," Al replied, not looking at the blonde next to him.
Ed gave Al an odd look, "You ok?" he asked concerned.
"No," Al replied as he shook his head, "I wish Alley would come with us, this was we could help her. I don't feel comfortable leaving her here alone," he said as he looked at Ed.
Ed blinked with surprise. He didn't understand why Al was so concerned about a girl that didn't even want their help.
"Well, if she doesn't want to come with us, we can't make her," Ed pointed out, though Al already knew this.
"Yeah, I know," Al sighed, "Would it be ok if we stopped in to see her once more before we leave?" he asked hopefully as he looked to Ed.
Ed smiled and nodded, "I don't see how that would help, but alright. Just as long as we get back to Resembool to drop off unwanted luggage," he agreed.
Al laughed a bit, "If Winry heard you say that, she'd hit you Brother," he warned him.
"Yeah, well," Ed said as he put his arms behind his head, "After tomorrow, I won't have to worry about it anymore."
Ed, Al, and Winry rounded the corner of that 'oh-so-familiar' alleyway. Winry smiled when she noticed the empty food container. They walked around the trashcan and saw Alley lying on the ground; she's covered up with the jacket.
"Alley?" Winry asked as she knelt next to the girl and gently shook her, "Alley?" she said again when she got no response.
Alley began to cough violently, causing Winry to jump back.
"Something's wrong," Al said as he and Ed ran to Winry's side.
"She doesn't look too good," Ed said as Alley continued to cough uncontrollably.
Winry thought for a second, "Come to think of it, she hasn't really looked very good at all," she said as she slowly shook her head.
"Yeah, when we met her, she did look a little discolored," Ed agreed as he looked to Winry.
"What should we do?" Al asked as he too looked to Winry.
"We have to take her to the doctor," Winry said as she got to her feet, "Al, you carry her. Let's go," she said as she patted Al on the arm.
Armstrong is seen walking through the hallway, pants in hand. Riza walked past him and did a double take when she saw what he was carrying.
"Um, Major," she said as she turned around and walked up to him, "With all do respect, might I ask what you are doing with those pants sir?" she asked as she motioned to the pants in his arm.
Armstrong nodded, "I'm taking them to Havoc and Mustang," he said as he turned to look at the door.
He raised his hand to knock on it.
"Wait!" Riza yelled, nearly grabbing the Major's hand, "I'll take them for you," she smiled as she reached for the pants.
Armstrong gave her an odd look, "But I'm already here," he said confused.
"Yes, b-but they're not. So I'll take the pants to them," Riza said with a nod.
She took the pants from Armstrong and walked away.
The door opened and Havoc peeked his head out, "The Fuhrer called and said you had our pants," he said with a smile.
Armstrong gave him an odd look, "Lieutenant Hawkeye took them," he said as he motioned down the hall with his thumb.
Havoc's eyes got big, "Colonel Mustang, Lieutenant Hawkeye has our pants sir!" he yelled before running out of the office.
"What! Stop her!" Mustang yelled as he ran out as well.
Armstrong stood in disbelief, "What is going on?" he asked himself before looking into the room. Lying in the center of the room, were two black miniskirts.
Hey! Sorry to stop there, but I'm signing off now. Bye!
Response To My Reviewers.
Akempis: Um, the point of your review is unknown to me. If you didn't like, fine. But could you try to be a bit more constructive next time…please?
heart of flame: You…love it? Really? YAY! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!
Kaiya-Chan: Awwww, that was so nice that you asked first. I like it when people want my help and I'm flatter when they get ideas from my work, but I hate when they assume it is ok to use it. I always try to ask before I use something, though I often forget or don't think of it. I guess I'm as bad as the people who don't ask me (sob). Anyways, a sequel? Really? That is great, I'm so reading it. Yay! I'm glad Ed is more in character, I'm trying as hard as I can to keep him that way. Oh, listen to me ramble without answering your question. Ok, so I did it on purpose, did the curiosity get to you? Hehehehehe, of course you can use it (but you probably figured I'd say that). I can't wait to see how you'll use it, but you can. Hehehehehehehehe, now the curiosity is getting to me. Stupid karma. Anyway, talk to ya later.
ILoveMyGojyo.
