The Thin Line Between Love and Hate
Chapter 2: Is it a Want to Be, Belong?
A/N: Thanks to my one reviewer. Without you I may not have continued with writing this. I'm hoping to get some more on this chapter... please? Hehe
Disclaimer: HP is not mine though it would be so effing awesome if it was.
Harry awoke with a sudden jolt as his eyes searched frantically around his room in fear… for what? He did not know. He grabbed his scar, expecting it to hurt but he felt no pain come. As his breathing became slower and less heavy, Harry reviewed what he could remember from his dream:
He and Hermione were sitting by the lake at Hogwarts talking about whatever came to their minds first. Hermione laughed at something he just said and had fallen backwards so she was lying on her back looking up at the sky.
"Harry, don't you think that cloud looks sort of like an owl?" Hermione asked, pointing directly above her.
Harry fell on his back to see what Hermione was pointing at and said with a smile, "Yeah, sort of. Looks more like some sort of demented house elf; Dobby wearing a hat, maybe."
Hermione stole a quick look over at Harry, wondering If he had subliminally been hinting at something or other. When she saw no look of contempt in his eyes, she looked back up at the sky, "That cloud looks like Snape" she laughed, pointing up to a menacing looking cloud to her right.
"And that one" Harry smiled, "Looks sort of like… I don't know… Voldemort" Dream Harry could not figure out why he had said that the cloud looked like the Dark Lord, but Real Harry guessed that it was he who had something to do with the dream.
Dream Harry looked over at Hermione to see her reaction to what he had said but neither Harry, Dream or Real, had ever imagined Hermione's reaction.
Her face immediately clouded over, her smile turned into a frown, her eyes became dull and almost lifeless, and everything Harry had ever loved about hi best friend was gone. Not only did Hermione change into someone Harry did not know, the sky quickly clouded over with dark and dreadful thunder clouds. Rain started pouring down with loud claps of thunder sounding in the distance. As soon as the rain hit the Unknown Hermione, she started melting ("sort of like the wicked witch in 'The Wizard of Oz'" real Harry thought), and just like that witch, the Unknown Hermione screamed in a loud, high pitched, very un-Hermione like voice, "I'm meeeeelting!"
The Unknown Hermione glared as Harry with true menace in her eyes and Dream Harry could feel the fear coursing through his body and across his face. The moment there was nothing left of what was Hermione, his best friend with the bushy brown hair and know-it-all ways, Harry awoke.
Harry could not fathom the meaning of the dream but he did know that the fear he felt as the Unknown Hermione glared at him was real. He was terrified.
Knowing that he would not be able to fall asleep, Harry decided to write to Hermione and make sure she was okay and not melted like a popsicle on a hot summer day.
"Dear Hermione" Harry wrote, choosing his words carefully. "I hope you're well, I know I haven't written to either your or Ron so far this summer, but I know you'll understand that I've needed some time to think about a lot of stuff.
"I really hope that you've had an okay summer so far, mine could be better as you can imagine. The Dursley's have left me alone for the most part of the time I've been back from Hogwarts. I think Dumbledore's talked to them before I came because the Dursley's have been… well, very un-Dursley like."
Harry inspected his letter so far, looking to see if he had given anything away. Deciding that there was nothing to give away, Harry started to continue the letter but was confused about how to a) introduce his odd dream and b) put it in some sort of code (just in case). After debating whether the dream was even important or not, Harry just decided to leave the particulars (Voldemort) out and make it out to be a funny dream:
"I have just woken up from the weirdest dream I think I've ever had; Weird in a funny – 'haha' sort of way. You and I were watching the clouds when it suddenly started pouring down rain. As soon as the rain touched you, you started screaming "I'm meeelting!" and you became a puddle of melted Hermione. It was definitely very odd and I'm sure you'll find it humorous."
Quite pleased with what he wrote and sure he hadn't given any information about important matters, Harry concluded his letter:
"I'm missing you and Ron so I hope to see you soon. Make sure to tell Ron that I say 'hi' and that I'll see him soon. Harry"
Harry sealed the letter to his friend with a sigh and he knew that Hermione would know something was up. He sounded way too cheerful for someone whose godfather had just died; Hermione was a bright girl, she would catch this and be concerned. Maybe she would even catch the oddness of the dream, Harry didn't know.
After some gentle prodding, coaxing with some treats and a promise of a nice long rest, Hedwig finally awoke and very irritably took the letter from Harry. He watched his snowy white owl fly out the window into the dark night with a melancholy look on his face.
There were no stars, Harry noticed as he stared out his window as he gazed into the darkness. This night was no different than any other of his sleepless nights, save for the dream; it was dark, silent, depressing and lonely. Though Harry knew that he always had Hermione and Ron to count, that feeling was slightly off-putting after the death of his Godfather. The grief that Harry felt was tremoundous even though he would not admit it to himself that he would never see Sirius again.
On nights like these, countless questions ran through
Harry's mind:
Why did Sirius have to die?
Why couldn't
Voldemort just have died so I wouldn't be in this situation and I'd
be normal like everyone else?
Why me?
Many would think that
the most common and disturbing question in Harry's mind would be "why
me?" but it wasn't. There was one that was worse. A question
upon which he constantly dwelled on and feared the most:
"Why
am I alone?"
Hermione could not sleep. Plain and simple. Her body was tired, but her mind insisted that she stay up until is decided that it wanted some rest. Unfortunatly for Hermione, this meant that she was bored, and Hermione Granger never got bored. Her eyes were to tired to stay open to read a book but when she closed them, they eventually opened again. Her arms felt like lead, so heavy that she didn't want to even try lifting them to write but when she tried to rest, her ams felt like moving. That night, there was no happy medium for Hermione Granger and she figured that there was no way she would fall asleep.
As her last resort, Hermione slowly walked over to the window, sat down on the window seat and looked at the night sky. There were no stars, she noticed and its was black as black can be. At the moment, the sky was a mirror image of her feelings. Though Sirius wasn't her godfather, he was her friend so it hurt to lose him. What hurt more though, was knowing that Harry was out there somewhere in pain because of his death. Sirius was one of the last real threads that Harry had of his parent's lives and now that thread was lost. There was only one more left and Hermione just knew that if Harry lost Lupin, there would be nothing that could bring Harry back.
Hermione sighed and pressed her forehead against the cold glass. Slowly, as her eyes began to close, terrible pain shot through her entire body. Her chocolate eyes quickly opened at the pain seared through her arms, back then legs. Trying not to scream out, she bit her lips until she felt blood but that just made her bite harder. Tears welled up in her eyes and Hermione couldn't move. She was frozen to her seat in complete and utter pain and any sort of movement whatsoever felt like thousands of tiny knives piercing her skin.
Then, as suddenly as the pain began, it stopped. With a jolt, she turned her head and looked around her room in fear... for what? She did not know. Hermione remembered nothing but the pain, not what caused it, not why the blood was running from her lip, not even why she was sitting on her window seat.
Pressing her forehead against the window once again, the chilling cold soothed Hermione's aching mind. Closing her eyes and beginning to fall asleep, she started dreaming of nothing of importance, really. It was one of the dreams where the dreamer never remembers it after the awake.
There was a sudden tapping on the window which woke a very unhappy Hermione from her rest. She saw Hedwig and moved slowly to open the window, afraid that the pain would begin again. Wondering why Harry would send her a letter so late at night, Hermione took it from the Hedwig's leg as she flew onto Hermione's bed.
Hermione quickly opened the letter, knowing that it would be something important and scanned through it. Her heart dropped when she read the words:
"Dear Hermione,
I hope you're well, I know I haven't written to either your or Ron so
far this summer, but I know you'll understand that I've needed some
time to think about a lot of stuff.
I really hope that you've had an okay summer so far, mine could be
better as you can imagine. The Dursley's have left me alone for the
most part of the time I've been back from Hogwarts. I think
Dumbledore's talked to them before I came because the Dursley's have
been… well, very un-Dursley like.
I have just woken up from the weirdest dream I think I've ever
had; Weird in a funny – 'haha' sort of way. You and I were watching the
clouds when it suddenly started pouring down rain. As soon as the rain
touched you, you started screaming "I'm meeelting!" and you became a
puddle of melted Hermione. It was definitely very odd and I'm sure
you'll find it humorous.
I'm missing you and Ron so I hope to see you soon. Make sure to tell Ron that I say 'hi' and that I'll see him soon.
Harry"
Something was wrong. Hermione felt it in her bones. Harry's letter was too cheerful and not like Harry at all. His dream about her was important, she knew, and she knew that he knew it too. Something was very, very wrong. Was this why she had hurt? Was the dream the reason for the unbearable pain?
A look of extreme worry covered Hermione's face as she grabbed a small piece of paper and wrote seven small words:
You need to get out of there.
A/N: Oooo sort of a cliffhanger... hope you like! Please, please, please review! You don't really understand how much reviews mean until you write a fic lol!
