It was 9:40; and Jessie had decided that she'd done enough of the 'hostess' routine, and needed a break from her party.

From her life.

And while she couldn't exactly put the latter of the two on hold, she decided to break away from the festivities by creeping around to the side of the house, that was boxed in by two wooden gates; it was just a bare grass strip, with one old fern creeping up the fence adjacent to their next door neighbours- there was one large plastic box that had stored her father's put-it-together-yourself shelf, that had been shoved away- she used it as a seat.

She could hear the music bellowing out- they were singing a foo fighters song at the moment- and Jessie could hear the laughter and loud dancing steps.

She was glad to be away from it all.

JESSIE I just wish there was a rewind button, so I could go all the way back to where this started………..when I started to turn into the person I am now………….

She'd politely smiled, and hugged her friends as they arrived- though some of them were only on the list to lift the number of people- she thanked them for their presents and assured them she'd open them all up later on in the evening.

She walked around the dance floor, smiling and waving to those who acknowledged her- but it seemed everyone was too engulfed in the music, dancing, food and outfits to care about her anymore………and no one noticed the sad, far-off look in her eyes………..no one even commented on Katie's absence………..even though she was Jessie's better half, and one was hardly ever seen without the other……….no one asked Jessie where Katie was, or if she'd be arriving later on.

And Jessie was partly grateful that she didn't have to drag the story out of her mouth again and again- but she was also saddened………….Katie had changed her whole life……….she was her whole life……….and because she so desperately wanted to keep that a secret………..no one knew how much she meant to her……….and how much it hurt to not have her there.

JESSIE was it when my parents got divorced? When I stopped eating? When Lily, Zoe and Grace came into my life………….?

Jessie sighed, and ran her hands over her red silk skirt- smoothing it out.

She wanted to cry- but stopped herself when she heard the wooden gate creak open.

Jessie sat bolt-up right, but relaxed when Grace walked closer, and the moon's light showed her face.

"Its you?" Jessie commented, relaxing her body.

Grace nodded "its me", she gestured towards the box Jessie was sitting on, and Jessie moved over, allowing Grace to take a seat beside her.

"Why are you………….?" Jessie started.

"I needed to get away………..from what could have been an awkward situation………… I didn't know anyone was going to be here" Grace sighed, tucking a ringlet curl behind her ear.

Jessie nodded, "I'm guessing this was another 'Eli' situation?" she asked, softly.

Grace nodded, and looked down at her mint skirt- she smoothed it out with a shaky hand.

"What made it an awkward situation?" Jessie proceeded.

Grace let out another heavy sigh, "we danced………..it was perfect…………." She turned to Jessie and gave a small smile, "he smelt really good……….." Jessie laughed; "and……….I was almost going to say something that I couldn't possible say because it would make things worse than they already are………." She ended, on a heavy note.

"What were you going to say to him?" Jessie asked.

"Ah no………..if I tell you then it will be out there……….in the open……….and for now, this is something that I need to keep close by………"

"I know how that feels!" Jessie exclaimed.

Grace turned to her, with a raised eyebrow; "care to share?" she asked, lightly.

Jessie turned away, not willing to talk to Grace, of all people, about her problems. But something crawled up her throat- and the words, against her will- came tumbling out- and she couldn't rescue them.

"I love Katie"

Grace turned her body slightly towards Jessie, "I know you do"

Jessie glanced at Grace with an astonished look on her face, "you do?" she asked.

Grace smiled, and gave a small nod; "it's completely obvious!"

Jessie allowed her shoulders to slump, "then again……….you knew before I did how I felt about Katie, didn't you?"

Grace gave a mischievous smile, "maybe" she replied, whimsically.

"I was holding that so close to me……….my love for Katie……….I didn't want anyone to know about it……….especially not my family………..and all the while, you knew!" she sighed.

Grace placed her hand gently on Jessie's shoulder, "I have learned not to worry about love; but to honour its coming with all my heart" Grace said, in a gentle whisper.

Jessie turned to her, "where did that come from?" she asked, amazed.

Grace gave a light laugh, "Alice Walker said it………she was a womanist writer". Jessie smiled, but turned away again.

"Don't you think it's completely true though?" Grace pursued; "you shouldn't worry about the strings attached to love, or what other may think of you for loving someone………you should just accept it………welcome it…………"

JESSIE I know my life changed for the better when I met Katie……….our meeting is the one thing I would never erase from my life……….not for anything!

Jessie turned to Grace, and without saying anything, flung her arms around her, in a tight embrace.

"Wo!" Grace exclaimed, returning the hug.

Jessie pulled away and smiled- Grace was surprised to see tears roaming down her cheeks.

JESSIE and I wouldn't erase that conversation with Grace either………never ever!

Jessie stood up, and looked towards where the party was- bright lights, laughter, music………..she wanted to step back into that atmosphere.

"Thanks Grace" she said, looking down at her- and Grace smiled.

"You've been saving me a lot lately………it's becoming a habit!" she added, and Grace laughed- watching as Jessie walked towards the gate, but before she opened it, she turned around.

"Maybe you should take some of your own advice………..don't worry about the strings that are attached to love………..just accept it" she said, and opened the gate- walking back out to the party.

Grace looked down at her quivering hands, and then back to the closed gate, "I have" she whispered, and raised her hand to her cheek, swiping at a fresh tear.


AUTHORS NOTE

the party theme isn't over yet- it might continue on for the next 3 or so chapters, I don't know, just bare with me (I'm on a roll, and loving it!)