Chapter Eight
More Apologies
James was in an excellent mood when he returned to the common room later that evening. Quidditch practice had gone really well, he'd made a spectacular save that had more than made up for last week's abysmal one, and Remus was getting better.
But when he crawled through the portrait hole and joined his friends by the fire, his joy was not reflected in their faces. Lily looked about to cry again, Peter was staring disconsolately into the fire, Sirius was glaring at his fingers, and Jesse was avoiding looking at all of them. He stared around in confusion and sat down next to Lily on the couch.
"What's wrong?" he asked, fearing the answer. Surely Remus hadn't relapsed in that short amount of time? He'd only just begun to get better!
"Remus, of course," Sirius told him fiercely. James knew his friend wasn't mad at him and dismissed the tone in his voice. "And that bitch Alyssa. She's-" His voice choked, more from anger than anything else. "She's turned him into a bloody vampire!" James closed his eyes and let this sink in. It made sense, of course. Remus had survived a bite from a vampire, so he was doomed to live with that curse. As if he didn't already have enough to deal with.
"And that's not all," came a soft voice from his side. He looked down at his girlfriend's sad face. "The vampire and the werewolf...they don't agree. Dumbledore says they're fighting each other for control of Remus' body. They're killing each other, and it's hurting him something awful." Her voice shook, and James put his arms around her, holding her close. From her armchair, Jesse saw this small comfort and felt a twinge of jealousy. She missed having that kind of person in her life. Then again, she couldn't say that she ever had, exactly. The only person she'd been that close to was Remus, and that had been years ago.
Peter was saying something, his voice heavy. Jesse looked up at Sirius. She was rather worried about him; he was really upset about what was happening. Of course, they all were, but Sirius tended to dwell on things when they were really bad. And this was looking really bad.
"I'm sure he'll be fine," James said firmly, always the rock of support in the group. Jesse wondered briefly if he ever wanted someone else to take that role. "Remus is strong, he's proven that plenty of times. If anyone can handle this, it's our Moony." Lily smiled encouragingly and settled her head against his shoulder. It was so wonderful to have a boyfriend who had such faith in his friends.
"Hey, why don't we go see him before we go to bed? I don't think anyone feels like sleeping much, and I haven't gotten to talk to him a lot yet." Peter shifted uncomfortably.
"We can't. Dumbledore says he has to be isolated at night, because that's when the vampire is awake and fighting the werewolf. With both creatures alert, he's simply too dangerous." He shivered. "We had to tie him down to the bed, or he might have hurt someone-or himself." James stared at his friend in shock.
"You're serious?" No one made the familiar joke, and the silence hung heavier than usual.
"He'll still be going to classes and all that," Peter explained after a while. "We just have to make sure he's back in the hospital wing before dark." James shook his head in disbelief.
"What about his change? That's less than a month away. What'll happen if the vampire is still in him?"
"We don't know," Sirius said angrily. "We just have to wait," he spat out the word like poison. "Wait and hope." James sighed.
"Then there's no use in dwelling on it," he said, all practicality again. "Let's get some sleep, we can see him tomorrow. Thank God it's a weekend." Everyone nodded and reluctantly got up to go to their respective dorms. Lily gave James a tight hug before following Jesse up the stairs to their dorm room.
"See you in the morning," James called out, managing to sound halfway cheerful. Lily smiled at him but didn't reply.
Saturday was overcast and gray, but the rain had all but stopped. A light drizzle kept everything at its soggy best, but it wasn't enough to soak anyone who needed to go outside.
Nevertheless, the five disconsolate teenagers stayed within the walls of Hogwarts. They'd all gotten up very early, after having slept little, and had gone to see Remus. But he'd been fast asleep, exhausted after the night-long battle. They'd left him quietly and decided to come back later that day.
In the meantime, they had to find something to do to occupy their minds. It was no good trying to talk-every conversation somehow turned back to Remus, and that was not what they needed to think about. James got out a pack of Exploding Snap and a chess board, and they began having tournaments. No one was really into the games, but they served to pass the time until lunch.
Lunch was a loud affair. Everyone had heard by now that Remus was awake, and most had heard his screams of pain throughout the night-especially the Hufflepuffs, who had their common room near the hospital wing. They were used to being the bottom of the school, generally ignored without being disliked. Now they knew something the others didn't, and they were milking it for all it was worth. Their table was crammed with students, and the Ravenclaw and Gryffindor tables were all but empty.
The Slytherins, most of them, didn't seem to care much. This was no surprise to anyone, especially the Marauders. They sat with their backs turned to the mass of people at the Hufflepuff table and ate their lunches in silence. They were about to visit Remus again, and all of them feared what they would find.
Remus was awake when his friends entered halfway through lunch. He'd just finished his own meal, which consisted of a thick liquid that held all the nutrients he needed. He was glad he'd already finished; it made him feel rather ashamed that he couldn't even keep down solid food.
He smiled genuinely when they pulled up chairs and circled around his bed. To them, his smile was heart-wrenching; he looked so small and pale, propped up against his pillows, and the smile looked as if it was too big for his face. But they grinned back and greeted him casually, knowing how much he hated being mothered and worried over.
"How're you feeling?" James asked offhandedly.
"Not too bad," Remus replied with a shrug. "Kind of tired, but I'll get over it."
"How did you sleep?"
"Better than all of you, it would seem," he commented, raising an eyebrow. "I told you not to worry about me." Sirius rolled his eyes.
"And when have we ever listened to you?" They laughed lightly, feeling a bit nervous around each other. No one really knew what to say to Remus, what would make him mad and what would make him feel better.
"How was Quidditch practice?" Remus asked of James. James' face brightened. This was something he could talk about happily. He immediately launched into a play-by-play of the night's practice, re- enacting his spectacular save and making humorous comments on various mistakes the team had made. He kept them all entertained for at least half an hour, going over everything that had happened. Remus watched with genuine interest; Quidditch was something James really, truly loved, and hearing him talk about it made it seem like the best thing in the world.
Just as James was finishing up, Madam Pomfrey came over, a vial of potion clutched in her hand.
"That's quite enough, Mr. Potter," she said sternly. "No need in exciting my patient more than necessary. He needs his rest now, so you five had best be moving along." She gestured towards the door with the bottle of potion, then turned to Remus.
"This is for a dreamless sleep, as I'm sure you know. It should help you get some rest before tonight." She glared at the others, who were still huddled around his bed, and they reluctantly went on their way, waving good- bye to Remus. He gave them another happy grin and took the potion from Madam Pomfrey.
"What d'you think she meant, 'before tonight'?" James asked as they trooped out of the hospital wing.
"Before the vampire wakes up, of course," Peter said unhappily. "I doubt he can sleep with that going on inside him." James nodded, feeling the familiar sadness settling over the group at these words. He searched for something to say that would brighten them, but in vain. He began wishing for Monday to come so they would have something to do to pass the time.
Remus was still under the effects of the sleeping draught when night fell, but a shock of pain from deep within his body startled him awake. He stared around the darkened room groggily, unable to figure out where he was. Pain wracked his body again, and he forgot to care.
The monsters in his body were battling again. He tried to subdue them, but they were a part of him and would not be beaten that easily. Wave after wave of pain ripped through him as the monsters tore at each other, but he clenched his teeth and refused to cry out. He would not give in to the pain, he would not be that weak.
The next morning, Remus could tell from the look on Madam Pomfrey's face that he had been unable to contain his screams completely. He looked away in shame, wondering what he sounded like and whether he kept her or anyone else awake. It was only by pure luck that there were no other students in the hospital wing.
But that was about to change. Just as Madam Pomfrey gave Remus a potion for sleep, a second-year stumbled in, retching something terrible. The nurse quickly got him settled on a bed across the room from Remus and went to get her bucket. The student didn't look very sick now that the nurse was away, and he kept looking over at Remus curiously. Remus gave a low, exasperated growl and downed the potion. The sooner he fell asleep, the better.
When James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, and Jesse entered the hospital wing after lunch that Sunday, Remus was still fast asleep. They turned to go, then noticed something different about the hospital wing.
"Where did all these people come from?" Sirius asked, looking around at the many occupied beds. There were students everywhere, vomiting, coughing, sneezing, or even clutching broken bones. Madam Pomfrey was bustling about in a fury, trying in vain to attend to all the sick or injured students. As she passed the five healthy teenagers, James stopped her.
"What's going on?" he asked. She looked up at him, her face drawn and tired.
"Sick! Everyone's sick or hurt! It's like a huge epidemic has swept the school, but everyone is complaining of something different!" She looked ready to faint.
"Do you need some help?" Lily asked immediately. She was rather good at helping sick people, and had actually been considering training to be a medi-witch. Any experience she could get would be needed.
"Oh, you're an angel!" the nurse said, grabbing Lily in a huge hug and practically breaking down in tears. "In my office, you'll find everything and anything you need. You have no idea what this means to me!" With that, she rushed off with the barf-bucket.
Lily looked at the others.
"What say we pass the time in here?" she suggested. "We're going to need something to do over the rest of the day. Besides," Lily added, "this way we'll be here if Remus wakes up or needs help." At this, everyone agreed to stay.
"Good idea, Lily," James murmured, giving her a light hug. The moment was broken by the sound of violent vomiting nearby.
"Let's get going, then," Jesse said in a sarcastically bright voice. They laughed and went to the nurse's office to gather materials.
The time passed much more quickly when they were busy helping people. It soon became apparent that most of the students had made themselves sick or hurt just so they could get a close-up view of Remus; no one knew that he was both vampire and werewolf, but it was apparent that something odd was happening to him. The students' curiosity was rather annoying, but there wasn't much anyone could do about it. Sick students were sick students, whether they wanted to be ill or not.
As night fell, a kind of hush came over the hospital wing. Everyone began to watch Remus more closely, and all the students were pinching themselves to stay awake. The unlucky ones who had been given sleeping potions carefully dumped their draughts into their pitchers of water or vaporized them with their wands. No one was going to miss what they'd come to hear.
Madam Pomfrey approached her five helpers.
"I suppose you'd better be off, then," she said with a small sigh. "I can handle anything that happens in the night."
"Maybe one of us should stay with you," Jesse said quickly. "We won't get much sleep tonight anyways, and this way you have help if you need it." The nurse hesitated; she obviously wanted to accept, but it was against her better judgment.
"But Professor Dumbledore-"
"Professor Dumbledore said we couldn't visit Remus at night," Sirius interrupted. "Not that we couldn't help you out." To everyone's relief, a smile crossed her face.
"Alright then," she consented, then became stern again. "But one word from the Headmaster, and you're out!" They all nodded, and she turned to go back to her office. "Whoever is staying to help me, there's a student in bed 12A who needs a sleeping potion."
They looked at each other uncertainly, then Sirius spoke up.
"Who's got dibs on that guy?" Jesse volunteered and went to get the potion while the others spread out, continuing whatever they'd been doing before.
Jesse filled a vial half-full of sleeping potion and took it to the student in bed 12A. He obviously needed it, so she stood by his bed to make sure he actually drank it. He did, but not happily. In moments, he was fast asleep.
She took the vial back to be cleaned, then looked around the room. A few students were still vomiting; they seemed to have used spells on themselves, and one or two had been a bit too strong for their own good. One girl was vomiting nonstop, and Lily had given her a bucket to keep by the bed.
Jesse turned to help a student next to her, who was coughing horribly. Suddenly, the coughs were drowned out by a blood-curdling scream. It echoed through the hospital wing and down the corridors, chilling everyone who heard it. Some of the students began to think they didn't want to be there, after all-the Marauders and the girls among them.
Jesse quickly tended to the coughing boy, who was looking very pale, and turned to find Remus. He was lying in his bed, wide awake. His arms were tied to the posts at the headboard, his legs at the other end. It was a humiliating position, and he seemed to realize that. As Jesse watched helplessly, he twisted and pulled at his bonds, his eyes that frightening yellow again. She reached out a shaking hand and touched his wrist lightly; he felt the feather-light touch and turned to her as if noticing her for the first time. His eyes flashed gray for a split second, and she shuddered at the anguish in them. No one deserved that kind of pain.
His face suddenly contorted in pain, his eyes squeezed shut and his mouth opened in another scream. Jesse kneeled by his bed and leaned her forehead against the side of the mattress, her hands wrapped loosely around his wrist. Perhaps her touch was comforting somehow, for he calmed down quickly afterward. She stood slowly and looked around the room, remembering her duties. A girl in the bed next to Remus' looked about to throw up, although she had come in complaining of a broken arm. Jesse ran to get a bucket, but Lily had it covered. On her way back out of the office, Jesse passed the mirror over the sink in Madam Pomfrey's bathroom; she was shocked to see tears streaming down her face.
"Now that won't do," she told her reflection firmly, wiping them away. "No need to upset the patients even more." She grabbed a sleeping potion and went back out to see who was in need of it.
The rest of the night was spent dishing out sleeping potions. Once the students realized there was nothing exciting or cool about Remus' suffering, they were keen to escape from it. As they weren't allowed to leave the hospital wing until the next day at the earliest, they suddenly wanted their discarded potions again.
But there simply wasn't enough of the potion to go around. Jesse gave everyone a half dose and hoped it would at least get them started on sleeping, even if it wouldn't stay in effect the whole night. She was tempted to give Remus a dose, as scream after scream ripped from his throat, but Pomfrey was adamant.
"The Headmaster says he needs to be awake during this time, or the monsters won't fight."
"But how is that bad?" Jesse asked incredulously.
"Isn't it better that he suffer now, and get rid of one of them, rather than take a sleeping draught before going to bed every night for the rest of his life?" Jesse nodded and turned to administer said potion to a student nearby.
Monday was far from fun for all of them. They'd gotten up early to pick up Remus before breakfast, but the nurse wouldn't let him leave. She told them firmly that he needed sleep more than food, and that they could come by shortly before class.
They'd done as told, though none of them were excited about letting him go to class on an empty stomach. James grabbed a piece of toast for him, but Remus didn't eat it, saying he didn't need anything. It was shoved in James' book bag and saved for later.
Classes had passed slowly. James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, and Jesse stared warily at Remus all day, half expecting him to collapse in seizures or something. This annoyed him greatly, as he felt perfectly fine in daytime- except for the fact that he was very tired, and direct sunlight made him feel sick. But, aside from those things, there was nothing wrong with him. He got enough odd looks from other students, some of whom he didn't even know, and he didn't need that from his friends as well.
After their final class, Sirius ate dinner quickly and escorted Remus up to the hospital wing on his own. They'd decided to take turns doing this, so Remus wouldn't feel too mothered. When they got back to Remus' bed, the ropes were already tied to the headboard and footboard, laying in ominous coils on the carefully made bed.
Sirius glanced cautiously at his friend, but Remus said nothing. He sat down on the bed, not bothering to use the sheets and blankets, and dutifully began tying his feet to the ropes. Reluctantly, Sirius helped. That done, Remus stretched out on the bed and held his hands up for Sirius to tie them down. Sirius was relieved when Madam Pomfrey arrived to help him; he felt sick tethering his friend to the bed, like a dangerous animal. And Remus' quiet acceptance was not helping-Sirius almost wished his friend would start kicking and screaming, put up some sort of fight...
When Remus was safely tied down, Sirius bade him a dull "good night" and left the hospital wing. There was only one person Sirius could blame for all this: Alyssa Mant. She'd bitten Remus, she'd started all this, and now she was going to hear from Sirius.
Sirius turned down a well-lit corridor, headed for the Ravenclaw common room. He'd been there many times, as he mostly dated girls from Ravenclaw, but realized when he got to the familiar portrait that he didn't know the new password. At the beginning of the school year, it had been 'butternut squash,' but it usually changed every month. How was he supposed to guess it now?
"Sunglasses," he tried, saying the first thing that popped into his head. The golden retriever wearing glasses and reading a book blinked at him sleepily, woken from his nap. "Purple cow, hedgehog spine. Uh...pumpkin patch? Christmas spirit. Yule log. Shit! How in hell-"
He stopped short when he saw the dog portrait swing forward. Before he had the chance to turn and hide, a young boy crawled through the hole in the wall and dropped to the ground. Sirius guessed he was about second year. The brown-haired boy looked up warily, checking to see that the hall was empty. When he saw Sirius, he gave an audible gasp and backed against the wall.
"Who are you?" he whispered as the portrait swung closed. The dog glared down at him disapprovingly but remained silent.
"Sirius Black," Sirius said amiably. "And you?"
"Er...Bobby Wilkins." Sirius grinned.
"Your real name? Don't worry, I'm not going to get you in trouble for being out past curfew. Have you noticed that I'm not in bed, either?" The boy seemed to relax a bit.
"That's true...alright. I'm Jason Mant." Sirius looked at him in surprise.
"You wouldn't happen to be related to Alyssa Mant?"
"Sure, she's my sister. I know I don't look like her, but she takes after my mom and I after my dad." Sirius nodded.
"I'll buy that. Odd, though. Your sister is who I'm here to see. She wouldn't happen to be up, would she?" Jason rolled his eyes.
"She has a boyfriend," he pointed out exasperatedly, as if he'd done this many times. Sirius laughed.
"I'm not here for that. I just...need to talk to her. Is she up, or what?" Jason shook his head.
"I don't think so. She isn't feeling so good. You can come back tomorrow, maybe after class. Password's 'leopard spots.'" Sirius thanked him and walked away from the portrait hole with him, hoping he'd be able to sneak back later that night.
"So what are you up for?" Sirius asked casually after a while. To his annoyance, they were walking in the general direction of the Gryffindor tower. With his luck, they'd walk all the way there before he'd be able to turn around and backtrack.
"Goin' to the kitchens," Jason admitted. "My friends dared me a few days ago. We're all taking turns doing stuff, and this was my assignment." Sirius grinned, pleased that there were others Marauding the school at such a young age.
"You got the good job," Sirius told him in a fatherly tone. "The kitchens are easy, and the elves will give you anything." Jason looked a little brighter.
"Yeah, that's what I've heard. Is it really that easy to get in there? It seems like it'd be better protected if it was forbidden to students." Sirius scoffed.
"Protected? The only thing you have to watch for is Filch, and he doesn't go down there much. Mrs. Norris, of course, loves the place-there's more rats there, 'cause of the food." Jason nodded, absorbing all the advice eagerly. Sirius looked sideways at him. "You do know how to get in there, right?" Jason looked away uncomfortably.
"Well...I know where it is, and I know which portrait it's behind, but I don't know the password or anything. I figured I'd just guess or something." Sirius laughed softly, careful to remain quiet now that they were in the heart of the school. Filch could be lurking anywhere.
"There is no password. On the portrait, just tickle the pear and it'll let you right in."
"Pear? What pear?" Sirius raised an eyebrow.
"What pear?" he echoed. "Well, well. Seems you have the wrong portrait, after all." He paused, weighing his options. "Tell you what: I'll go with you-just this once. Show you what to do, how to act around the elves." Jason grinned up at him.
"That'd be great!" Sirius shushed him quickly.
"Lesson number one: don't talk above a loud whisper except when absolutely necessary. Mrs. Norris could be anywhere." Jason nodded, looking as if he wished he had a notepad to write all this down on. Leave it to a Ravenclaw, Sirius thought to himself, rolling his eyes. But he found he quite liked the kid; he showed signs of being the next James Potter, or even (dare he think it?) the next Sirius Black. He grinned as this thought crossed his mind and decided then and there to take the boy under his wing, bring him up as the Marauder he had the potential to be.
They reached the corridor where the kitchens were and Sirius watched happily as Jason glanced around the room, looking for the pear. He spotted it quickly and tickled it just so-and the painting swung forward.
"Cool," Jason whispered, looking past the painting. There was no portrait hole, like in the common rooms, but a large hole cut out of the wall that reached from floor to ceiling. The painting was big enough to cover it all.
Sirius steered his charge through the doorway and into the kitchens, which were brightly lit as always. Immediately, half a dozen elves converged upon them, holding out platters covered with food and chatting happily to the boys. Jason looked around in awe, amazed at how easy it was to just take a bit of food and stick it in his pocket. Sirius was already filling his robes with food, occasionally eating some. Jason eventually followed suit, gathering enough to fill himself and his friends. Even when he was done, the elves offered more and more types of food.
"Are they always this chipper?" he asked around a piece of donut. Sirius nodded, swallowing a bite of freshly baked pie.
"Yeah, they'll always help you out-whether you want it or not. But don't tell your friends that," he added quickly. Jason looked up at him quizzically. "Lesson number two: play a prank whenever possible. When you go back tonight, give them the food and force them to thank you a million times for what you've done. Tell them you had to dodge both Filch and Norris, and that getting past the portrait involved answering a complicated riddle, and that the elves were vicious and tried to beat you up as you took the food." To Sirius' joy, Jason grinned.
"And that I barely made it out with my life, only to run into Mrs. Norris again," he added, getting into the spirit. "I had to run and hide in an old classroom for ten minutes before she finally left." Sirius laughed.
"Now you're getting it! Then, when they all come down with you next time, you'll have a great laugh."
"I think I've heard of you," Jason said suddenly. Sirius waited for him to continue. "I wasn't sure before, but now I am...you're one of the Marauders, right?" Sirius grinned.
"You got it! The one and only Sirius Black. Remember that name-it'll be all over the papers someday!"
"This is so cool! Now I can tell everyone that I was taught by the infamous Sirius Black! You have no idea how popular this will make me among the guys." Sirius laughed, flattered.
"Well! Never realized how much of an impact I have on the little ones..." He grinned mischievously. "This calls for some serious corruption of young minds..." Jason looked up at him expectantly, but Sirius shook his head. "No, no. You'll find out what I'm planning when the rest of them do." Or when I do, he added silently. Lesson number three: never let anyone know when you haven't got a plan. But Jason would have to learn that one by himself; it was getting early, and they had to get moving before someone got up and found them.
"Okay, back to bed. We can't get caught now that we've performed the deed, that'd be even worse than beforehand." Jason nodded and followed him out of the kitchens. Sirius left him at the entrance hall. "You think you can get back to Ravenclaw without getting caught?"
"Sure I can, I've been taught by the best!" Sirius laughed and waved good- bye. Jason didn't realize it, but he still had plenty to learn if he wanted to live up to his teacher.
Sirius made it to the Gryffindor common room without incident and sank into an armchair to wait for the others. It was already dawn, and there was no use in going back to bed so soon before breakfast. Despite all he'd eaten, his stomach growled in anticipation of the meal.
It was odd, now that he thought about it. He'd gone to the Ravenclaw portrait in anticipation of finding Alyssa and chewing her out about Remus. Making her feel awful. Making her do something to stop his pain. Instead, he'd found her brother and had spent the whole night pleasantly teaching him a bit of what he knew. He'd grown to like the boy, despite how much he hated Alyssa.
Sirius eventually dropped off to sleep, despite himself. James and Peter left him there when they went down to breakfast, and as a result, he was only able to catch the last few minutes of it. He'd been woken up by Lily and Jesse, but had been slow in dressing and getting ready. He crammed a sausage into his mouth and watched sadly as the rest of the food disappeared.
"Alright, we've got Charms first," James announced as they stood up and gathered their things. "Let's go get Remus and see if he's feeling up to going to class." They followed James to the hospital wing and to Remus' bed. It was empty.
"He's already on his way to class," Madam Pomfrey explained, approaching them and looking quite worn out. She had a bucket in one hand and a pepper- up potion in the other. "Too bad you all have to go to class today...I could really use some help." They all sympathized, then thanked her for telling them where Remus was. She sighed heavily when they went off to join him, and James had the distinct feeling she was hinting at them to skip class and help her out.
Professor Flitwick was his usual perky self that morning. He beamed at each student as he or she filed into the classroom, then hopped up onto his pile of books just as the bell rang. James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, and Jesse all sat next to or near Remus, who was already seated in the second row. He smiled at them, but said nothing. He looked very tired, even more so than Sirius. Nevertheless, when the professor had explained what charm they'd be practicing and had set them loose in pairs, he jumped up from his seat, his eyes alight, and looked actually excited about practicing the charm. Charms and Transfiguration were Remus' best classes, and he usually didn't care much about practicing them since they came to him so easily.
"Why so excited today?" Sirius asked casually. He was partnered with James, Remus with Peter, and Lily with Jesse. They were all working right next to each other, though, and basically acted as one large group. Remus shrugged in response to Sirius' question.
"Anything's better than lying in that damned hospital wing all day." Sirius agreed with a nervous laugh, then turned to perform the charm on James. A beam of purple light shot out of the end of his wand, and James' hair turned bright orange.
"Oh, excellent, Mr. Black!" Professor Flitwick exclaimed, hurrying over to inspect his student's hair. "You've performed a perfect Color-Change charm on Mr. Potter's hair!" Half the class laughed behind their hands; they were supposed to be performing the charm on various blocks of wood and strips of parchment. James gave Sirius a friendly glare as the professor went away again, squeaking excitedly.
"Perfect except that you missed," he pointed out in an undertone. Sirius flashed him a Marauder grin.
"Who says I missed?" Everyone nearby laughed happily, and Lily changed James' hair back to normal.
After all their classes that day, it was James' turn to take Remus to the hospital wing for the night. Sirius gave him a sympathetic glance and went back to his dinner. Shortly afterwards, though, he stood and grabbed his things, a strange look on his face.
"Where are you going?" Jesse asked with a slight frown. She didn't like the odd gleam in his eyes. "Sirius?" He shook his head.
"Just to the common room." She stood up, too.
"Then I'll join you. I'm done here anyways." Sirius shot her a meaningful glare, which she ignored.
"I can make it up to the common room on my own, I think I know where it is by now," he told her lightly, rolling his eyes. But Jesse knew he was planning something else. By the looks on Peter's and Lily's faces, they knew too.
"Well, you can help me with my books, then," Jesse said cheerfully, but firmly. Sirius looked at Peter and Lily, who were staring at him, and realized that if he didn't let Jesse go with him, they all would.
"Fine, you can walk along in my presence," he said with a grin. "But you're carrying your own damn books." Jesse laughed and grabbed her bag, then followed Sirius out of the hall. He was walking quickly, as if trying to lose her. She matched his pace.
"It's not going to be that easy," she scolded, panting along beside him. Sirius was certainly stronger than she, and appeared to be rushing along effortlessly. He shot her a look when she continued to keep up with him. He was obviously annoyed, and not very good at hiding the fact.
"Why do you insist on coming with me?" he asked irritably. She gave him an appraising look.
"Because I know that look in your eye as well as anyone else, and I don't like it. You're planning something, and nothing good can come of it." Sirius rolled his eyes.
"So you think you're going to stop me."
"Yes, I do." She grinned. "That's the job of the little sister, isn't it? To keep her older brother out of trouble?" Sirius couldn't help but smile back, but he was still annoyed that he wasn't going to be able to shake her off.
"Well, if you won't leave me alone, you're going to have to witness what I'm going to do." She shrugged.
"So I will."
"You're not going to like it," Sirius warned.
"It's not going to happen," Jesse reminded him. "I'm not going to let it." Sirius rolled his eyes again and turned right towards the Ravenclaw common room. The dog looked at him in confusion when he supplied the correct password, but swung forward anyway.
"How did you know the password?" Jesse asked suspiciously.
"Marauder-in-training," was all he replied.
They climbed through the portrait hole and into the Ravenclaw common room, which was practically empty. No one spared them a second glance as they entered the room, which was remarkably like the Gryffindor common room. Sirius glanced around, then approached an armchair by the fire. The back of someone's blonde head was barely visible over the top. Jesse grabbed his arm and held him back, realizing whom he'd come to see.
"What do you think you're doing?" she hissed, dragging him back to the portrait hole where they could talk without Alyssa hearing them. He glared at her, trying to pull out of her grip.
"Giving that bitch a piece of my mind!" Jesse tightened her hold on his arm.
"Like hell you are! What d'you think you're going to say?" Sirius shrugged.
"Whatever comes out. Let go!" Jesse glared at him furiously and held on even more tightly.
"No. I'm not letting you do this-it's completely pointless! We're all upset about Remus, but screaming at Alyssa isn't going to help anything!" Her voice was about normal volume again, and Alyssa heard her name. She turned around in her chair to see who was talking about her.
"Black? What are you doing here?" she hissed, getting up and approaching them. An essay for Professor Binns was clutched in her hand. "How did you get into my common room?"
"You have a very kind brother," Sirius replied with a sneer. Alyssa blanched.
"What did you do to him?" she whispered dangerously. Others in the common room were now staring at them, having realized there were two non- Ravenclaws in their midst.
"Nothing. He gave me the password willingly." Sirius paused a moment. "He really is a cool kid." Alyssa glared at him venomously.
"What are you doing here, Black?" She glanced from him to Jesse and back again. Sirius finally tore his arm from Jesse's grip and turned to face Alyssa squarely.
"I want to talk about Remus," he said bluntly, then glanced around the room. "Let's go somewhere less...public, though." Alyssa looked around as well, then glared at him again.
"And why would I want to do that?" she hissed. "I don't particularly feel like talking to you, I have an essay to finish." With that, she turned to go back to her chair. Sirius grabbed the essay as she turned and whipped it out of her hand.
"What essay?" he murmured, shoving it into his pocket. Jesse gaped at him, Alyssa glared at him, and their audience muttered angrily amongst themselves. Sirius crossed his arms in front of him, waiting for Alyssa to say something. She glanced around, then rolled her eyes.
"Fine, come up to my dorm room," she finally agreed, though she looked far from happy about it. Sirius followed her up the spiral staircase, her essay still crammed into his pocket, Jesse at his side. She looked ready to hex him if he did or said anything too stupid.
Alyssa pulled chairs from one corner of the room and sat them facing her own bed, then gestured for Sirius and Jesse to sit down. She sat on her bed, leaning against the wall and watching them warily.
"What do you want to say, then? Just get out with it, and then I can get back to work." Sirius stood behind his chair and leaned on it, staring angrily at Alyssa. He suddenly realized he didn't know what he wanted to say; he'd expected the words to just come to him, but they weren't. He looked to Jesse for help, but she shook her head firmly and looked away. "Well?" Alyssa prompted, annoyance prominent in her voice.
"You-" Sirius began, hoping that by starting to talk, something would happen. But his mind remained blank. "Come with me," he said finally. If he couldn't tell her, he could show her. Alyssa snorted.
"Like hell I will. If you don't have anything to say, just give me my essay and get out of my common room." Sirius glared at her furiously. She wasn't cooperating! How was he supposed to prove a point to her if she wouldn't do as he said? He grabbed her essay out of his pocket and held it up for her to see, then turned and strode from the room.
Jesse watched him go angrily. Sirius was being such an idiot...what was he hoping to gain by doing this? Alyssa's face was turning red, and she glared at Jesse as if this was her fault.
"Get your boyfriend to give me my essay back!" she yelled. Jesse looked at her in surprise.
"He's not my boyfriend, and I have no control over what he does," she said evenly. Despite herself, she was getting rather angry; what right did Alyssa have to get angry with her? She hadn't done anything.
Alyssa bit back a frustrated scream, then followed Sirius out of the room. Jesse sighed, then joined her.
They followed Sirius all the way to the hospital wing, always a step or two behind him. He kept her essay in plain view, but was careful to keep her from getting it. He wondered, as they entered the wing, why she didn't go straight to Madam Pomfrey and report him. The truth was, she was a bit curious, despite herself.
Sirius went straight for Remus' bed, hoping Madam Pomfrey wouldn't kick them out before he could prove his point to Alyssa. She came up behind him and, before he could stop her, grabbed her essay.
"You idiot!" she hissed, shoving the paper into her pocket. "Don't you ever do that again! Stay away from my things, stay away from me, stay-" But she was cut off mid-sentence by a loud scream from the bed next to her. She looked in shock at the bed, staring through the darkness to see who it was. Remus stared back at her, his eyes blazing yellow and narrowed ferociously. She watched, transfixed, as his scream subsided and his eyes became steel gray again. He looked at her, trying to figure out who she was, or perhaps why she was there. Only moments later, his eyes became pain-filled, then flashed yellow again. He opened his mouth in another scream, showing sharp vampire teeth. Sirius turned to Alyssa angrily.
"See what you've done to him?" he hissed when the hospital wing was silent again. Jesse had moved around them and was at the head of Remus' bed, gently stroking his arm, which was tied to the head of the bed. Alyssa shuddered and looked away, straight into Sirius' eyes.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I did no such thing." She was visibly shaken, the echoes of the screams replaying in her mind, but her voice was clear and even.
"Don't try to deny it!" Sirius said warningly. "You made him a vampire, knowing full well that he's already a werewolf!" Alyssa gasped, her eyes suddenly very wide.
"He's a-a what?!" she hissed. Sirius stared at her for a moment.
"You mean...you didn't know that?" His voice had lost all of its anger, his expression was almost perplexed now. Alyssa shook her head. "Then...all this...it was an accident?" She stared shamefully at her feet.
"I wouldn't say that," she mumbled. "I-I meant to bite him, I just didn't know it would...do this." Sirius shifted his weight.
"You followed your instincts, you mean," he said quietly. "That still wasn't right. You knew you'd either pass on the curse, or kill him." Alyssa nodded.
"I know, but I couldn't control myself. It had been so long...and I knew his taste by that time, it was awful to know that he was within my reach, but I wasn't doing anything about it. Then one night, I just...couldn't take it anymore. I lost control, let the vampire do as she wished..." She heaved a sigh and looked up to meet Sirius' eyes. "I'm sorry. I know it was wrong, but..." Then, to her surprise, Sirius nodded.
"You followed your instincts," he repeated. "I understand." He sighed and looked her straight in the eye. "And I forgive you. You didn't wish this," he gestured to Remus, who was lying quite still, "on him, you just acted without thinking. You couldn't have known." Alyssa stared at him in shock, then threw her arms around his neck.
"Thank you, thank you! I never thought you'd understand..." Sirius shrugged, and she let him go.
"Well, I figure it's kind of the same with werewolves as with vampires..." Alyssa nodded, tears in her eyes.
"I'm so sorry, for you and for him!" she whispered. "I never meant for this to happen...I even felt bad the next morning, after I'd done it, even though I didn't know I'd done more than infect him. I hate cursing other people...but it just comes naturally." Sirius sighed and nodded.
"You can go, I guess," he said finally. "But you'll have to tell all this to Remus when he's feeling better." Alyssa looked rather pale at that, but agreed. It was, after all, only to be expected. She flashed Sirius a thankful smile, then retreated back to her common room.
Jesse half listened to the conversation, making sure Sirius didn't get out of hand. She was rather shocked that he told Alyssa of Remus' curse, but the girl needed to know about it to understand what was really going on.
Most of her attention, however, was focused on Remus. He was looking at her, his gray eyes boring into hers, with an odd expression on his face. She rubbed her hand up and down his arm, wrist to elbow and back, hoping it was somewhat comforting. He seemed to have stopped screaming, at any rate.
But the look in his eyes was somewhat disconcerting. It wasn't malicious, or anything bad, but Jesse couldn't quite understand it, and it bothered her. She had been best friends with Remus for ten years, and was used to knowing everything he was thinking. But since she'd come back to England and found him again, she'd realized she never knew just what was on his mind. He was almost always angry with her, which she couldn't even begin to understand, but there was more than that. He never looked at her as he used to, and he seemed forever careful to keep his thoughts hidden from her. From her first day at Hogwarts, she'd found herself drifting away from him. The more time she spent with him, the more he felt like a stranger.
But that wasn't quite right, either. Recently, he'd been acting more civil towards her again. He still closed off his thoughts, still refused to let her get as close as they used to be, but he was more friendly now. Jesse supposed it had started on karaoke night; he'd certainly seemed different then. But shortly afterward, he'd closed off and become cruel towards her again. So when had she noticed a definite change?
A few days ago, she finally decided. The day he woke up after Alyssa's attack. He'd given her this same, strange look that day, too, as if deciding something about her. Whenever she'd visited after that, he'd been just as friendly with her as with the others.
Had he forgiven her for whatever terrible thing she'd done?
But that didn't seem possible. They hadn't talked about it even once-Jesse still didn't know why he was so angry.
Then again, that was just like Remus. He rarely wanted to get into rows about things, preferring to ignore the topic until it went away. Hadn't he done that to her enough times, especially the first few days? Refusing to discuss a sensitive topic, necessary as it may be to talk about, was something Remus was known for among his friends.
Jesse sighed and pulled a chair forward with her free hand. She settled onto it and leaned forward, her right hand still on Remus' arm.
"How are you feeling?" she whispered. He smiled slowly.
"I'm okay, actually," he replied in a quiet voice. He was hoarse from screaming so much, but did indeed look relatively calm.
"Does it-does it still hurt? Even now?" He considered her question.
"No...only when they're actively fighting." Jesse knew from his eyes that it had been a lie, and wondered briefly why he'd said that.
"That's good," she said, playing along. If he was going to lie, he had a reason, and she didn't want to put him in an uncomfortable situation. As if he already isn't, she thought bitterly, eyeing the ropes around his wrists with hate. He followed her gaze and gave another little smile.
"I hardly notice they're there, half the time," he lied again. Why is he lying about all this? Like he's shielding me from the truth or something...
"That's good, too." She paused. "They seem to be pretty calm right now. It's been a few minutes since anything has...happened." Remus nodded.
"Don't know why, they're usually really active right now. Maybe one of them is finally winning..." A glimmer of hope welled up in Jesse. If one of the monsters was beating the other, that meant he'd soon be free!
"That's wonderful!" she whispered. Remus gave a light laugh and looked away, and the hope died in her. It had been another lie. She looked up at Sirius to find him receiving a tight hug from Alyssa. This shocked her greatly, and she almost laughed out loud. So Sirius had quelled his anger, after all. That was certainly a first...
Jesse looked back at Remus, who was staring at her again. She noticed, not for the first time, how interesting his eyes were. Though mostly a dark gray, they were shot through with silver and black. There was a twinge of color, a dark green, around the outer edges of his irises. She thought she could remember a time when his eyes had been all green, but that had been so long ago...when they were toddlers. And besides, that didn't make any sense. Why would his eyes have changed so drastically?
Something Sirius had said a long time ago came to the surface of her mind. "...he was young at the time-I think four, maybe five." Jesse gave a small gasp. Then...his eyes had once been green! They must have changed when he was bitten.
She shook her head. But Sirius must have been wrong. Remus couldn't have been bitten when he was that young, or she would have known! How could he have hidden it from her for five years?
Remus had heard her gasp, and was staring at her expectantly. She locked eyes with him and gave his wrist a gentle squeeze.
"Remus? We need to talk."
Sirius watched Alyssa go, not quite believing what had just happened. He'd forgiven her...was he even allowed to do that? It was Remus' place to forgive or not to. He was the one who was truly suffering.
But that wasn't quite true. Remus had to deal with the physical pain, but his friends had to live knowing that he was suffering so much, and they could do nothing. Sirius had simply forgiven Alyssa for bringing that kind of tension upon the group, not for biting Remus. Well, he'd done that too...but she understood that it was only his forgiveness, not Moony's.
Didn't she?
Sirius shook his head to clear it. Whether she understood or not, she would soon enough. As soon as Remus was feeling better-and he would be, and very soon-they could talk. Not that Remus would want to...it wasn't really his thing to discuss delicate subjects. But they would talk eventually. They had the whole school year, for goodness' sake!
He was about to turn and see how Remus was doing when he heard something he wasn't sure he was ever going to hear.
"Remus?" Jesse whispered. "We need to talk." And then, unbelievably, miraculously, Remus agreed.
"Okay." Did he understand what she meant? For it was obvious to Sirius, just from the tone in her voice. But perhaps Remus didn't quite know what she wanted to discuss... "I guess I've put this off long enough."
Well, that settled it. Remus knew exactly what he'd gotten himself into. Sirius smiled and slipped away without saying anything. He found Madam Pomfrey and pulled her aside.
"Remus and Jesse are talking," he said quietly. Her eyes narrowed, and she looked about to say something, but Sirius was quicker. "I know Dumbledore said not to visit him at night, but this is really important. And besides, he's tied up and she has enough common sense to keep her distance." The nurse glanced over to where the two were, still looking disagreeable. "They really need to talk," Sirius repeated. Pomfrey gave an exasperated sigh.
"Fine. I'll give her half an hour." With that, she walked off. Sirius grinned as he left the hospital wing. He knew that, despite what she said, she'd give them as much time as they needed. Madam Pomfrey's definition of half an hour was very different from most.
When Sirius finally crawled into bed that night, he fell asleep almost immediately. He'd made peace with Alyssa, Remus was making peace with Jesse, and everything was beginning to look much better...
More Apologies
James was in an excellent mood when he returned to the common room later that evening. Quidditch practice had gone really well, he'd made a spectacular save that had more than made up for last week's abysmal one, and Remus was getting better.
But when he crawled through the portrait hole and joined his friends by the fire, his joy was not reflected in their faces. Lily looked about to cry again, Peter was staring disconsolately into the fire, Sirius was glaring at his fingers, and Jesse was avoiding looking at all of them. He stared around in confusion and sat down next to Lily on the couch.
"What's wrong?" he asked, fearing the answer. Surely Remus hadn't relapsed in that short amount of time? He'd only just begun to get better!
"Remus, of course," Sirius told him fiercely. James knew his friend wasn't mad at him and dismissed the tone in his voice. "And that bitch Alyssa. She's-" His voice choked, more from anger than anything else. "She's turned him into a bloody vampire!" James closed his eyes and let this sink in. It made sense, of course. Remus had survived a bite from a vampire, so he was doomed to live with that curse. As if he didn't already have enough to deal with.
"And that's not all," came a soft voice from his side. He looked down at his girlfriend's sad face. "The vampire and the werewolf...they don't agree. Dumbledore says they're fighting each other for control of Remus' body. They're killing each other, and it's hurting him something awful." Her voice shook, and James put his arms around her, holding her close. From her armchair, Jesse saw this small comfort and felt a twinge of jealousy. She missed having that kind of person in her life. Then again, she couldn't say that she ever had, exactly. The only person she'd been that close to was Remus, and that had been years ago.
Peter was saying something, his voice heavy. Jesse looked up at Sirius. She was rather worried about him; he was really upset about what was happening. Of course, they all were, but Sirius tended to dwell on things when they were really bad. And this was looking really bad.
"I'm sure he'll be fine," James said firmly, always the rock of support in the group. Jesse wondered briefly if he ever wanted someone else to take that role. "Remus is strong, he's proven that plenty of times. If anyone can handle this, it's our Moony." Lily smiled encouragingly and settled her head against his shoulder. It was so wonderful to have a boyfriend who had such faith in his friends.
"Hey, why don't we go see him before we go to bed? I don't think anyone feels like sleeping much, and I haven't gotten to talk to him a lot yet." Peter shifted uncomfortably.
"We can't. Dumbledore says he has to be isolated at night, because that's when the vampire is awake and fighting the werewolf. With both creatures alert, he's simply too dangerous." He shivered. "We had to tie him down to the bed, or he might have hurt someone-or himself." James stared at his friend in shock.
"You're serious?" No one made the familiar joke, and the silence hung heavier than usual.
"He'll still be going to classes and all that," Peter explained after a while. "We just have to make sure he's back in the hospital wing before dark." James shook his head in disbelief.
"What about his change? That's less than a month away. What'll happen if the vampire is still in him?"
"We don't know," Sirius said angrily. "We just have to wait," he spat out the word like poison. "Wait and hope." James sighed.
"Then there's no use in dwelling on it," he said, all practicality again. "Let's get some sleep, we can see him tomorrow. Thank God it's a weekend." Everyone nodded and reluctantly got up to go to their respective dorms. Lily gave James a tight hug before following Jesse up the stairs to their dorm room.
"See you in the morning," James called out, managing to sound halfway cheerful. Lily smiled at him but didn't reply.
Saturday was overcast and gray, but the rain had all but stopped. A light drizzle kept everything at its soggy best, but it wasn't enough to soak anyone who needed to go outside.
Nevertheless, the five disconsolate teenagers stayed within the walls of Hogwarts. They'd all gotten up very early, after having slept little, and had gone to see Remus. But he'd been fast asleep, exhausted after the night-long battle. They'd left him quietly and decided to come back later that day.
In the meantime, they had to find something to do to occupy their minds. It was no good trying to talk-every conversation somehow turned back to Remus, and that was not what they needed to think about. James got out a pack of Exploding Snap and a chess board, and they began having tournaments. No one was really into the games, but they served to pass the time until lunch.
Lunch was a loud affair. Everyone had heard by now that Remus was awake, and most had heard his screams of pain throughout the night-especially the Hufflepuffs, who had their common room near the hospital wing. They were used to being the bottom of the school, generally ignored without being disliked. Now they knew something the others didn't, and they were milking it for all it was worth. Their table was crammed with students, and the Ravenclaw and Gryffindor tables were all but empty.
The Slytherins, most of them, didn't seem to care much. This was no surprise to anyone, especially the Marauders. They sat with their backs turned to the mass of people at the Hufflepuff table and ate their lunches in silence. They were about to visit Remus again, and all of them feared what they would find.
Remus was awake when his friends entered halfway through lunch. He'd just finished his own meal, which consisted of a thick liquid that held all the nutrients he needed. He was glad he'd already finished; it made him feel rather ashamed that he couldn't even keep down solid food.
He smiled genuinely when they pulled up chairs and circled around his bed. To them, his smile was heart-wrenching; he looked so small and pale, propped up against his pillows, and the smile looked as if it was too big for his face. But they grinned back and greeted him casually, knowing how much he hated being mothered and worried over.
"How're you feeling?" James asked offhandedly.
"Not too bad," Remus replied with a shrug. "Kind of tired, but I'll get over it."
"How did you sleep?"
"Better than all of you, it would seem," he commented, raising an eyebrow. "I told you not to worry about me." Sirius rolled his eyes.
"And when have we ever listened to you?" They laughed lightly, feeling a bit nervous around each other. No one really knew what to say to Remus, what would make him mad and what would make him feel better.
"How was Quidditch practice?" Remus asked of James. James' face brightened. This was something he could talk about happily. He immediately launched into a play-by-play of the night's practice, re- enacting his spectacular save and making humorous comments on various mistakes the team had made. He kept them all entertained for at least half an hour, going over everything that had happened. Remus watched with genuine interest; Quidditch was something James really, truly loved, and hearing him talk about it made it seem like the best thing in the world.
Just as James was finishing up, Madam Pomfrey came over, a vial of potion clutched in her hand.
"That's quite enough, Mr. Potter," she said sternly. "No need in exciting my patient more than necessary. He needs his rest now, so you five had best be moving along." She gestured towards the door with the bottle of potion, then turned to Remus.
"This is for a dreamless sleep, as I'm sure you know. It should help you get some rest before tonight." She glared at the others, who were still huddled around his bed, and they reluctantly went on their way, waving good- bye to Remus. He gave them another happy grin and took the potion from Madam Pomfrey.
"What d'you think she meant, 'before tonight'?" James asked as they trooped out of the hospital wing.
"Before the vampire wakes up, of course," Peter said unhappily. "I doubt he can sleep with that going on inside him." James nodded, feeling the familiar sadness settling over the group at these words. He searched for something to say that would brighten them, but in vain. He began wishing for Monday to come so they would have something to do to pass the time.
Remus was still under the effects of the sleeping draught when night fell, but a shock of pain from deep within his body startled him awake. He stared around the darkened room groggily, unable to figure out where he was. Pain wracked his body again, and he forgot to care.
The monsters in his body were battling again. He tried to subdue them, but they were a part of him and would not be beaten that easily. Wave after wave of pain ripped through him as the monsters tore at each other, but he clenched his teeth and refused to cry out. He would not give in to the pain, he would not be that weak.
The next morning, Remus could tell from the look on Madam Pomfrey's face that he had been unable to contain his screams completely. He looked away in shame, wondering what he sounded like and whether he kept her or anyone else awake. It was only by pure luck that there were no other students in the hospital wing.
But that was about to change. Just as Madam Pomfrey gave Remus a potion for sleep, a second-year stumbled in, retching something terrible. The nurse quickly got him settled on a bed across the room from Remus and went to get her bucket. The student didn't look very sick now that the nurse was away, and he kept looking over at Remus curiously. Remus gave a low, exasperated growl and downed the potion. The sooner he fell asleep, the better.
When James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, and Jesse entered the hospital wing after lunch that Sunday, Remus was still fast asleep. They turned to go, then noticed something different about the hospital wing.
"Where did all these people come from?" Sirius asked, looking around at the many occupied beds. There were students everywhere, vomiting, coughing, sneezing, or even clutching broken bones. Madam Pomfrey was bustling about in a fury, trying in vain to attend to all the sick or injured students. As she passed the five healthy teenagers, James stopped her.
"What's going on?" he asked. She looked up at him, her face drawn and tired.
"Sick! Everyone's sick or hurt! It's like a huge epidemic has swept the school, but everyone is complaining of something different!" She looked ready to faint.
"Do you need some help?" Lily asked immediately. She was rather good at helping sick people, and had actually been considering training to be a medi-witch. Any experience she could get would be needed.
"Oh, you're an angel!" the nurse said, grabbing Lily in a huge hug and practically breaking down in tears. "In my office, you'll find everything and anything you need. You have no idea what this means to me!" With that, she rushed off with the barf-bucket.
Lily looked at the others.
"What say we pass the time in here?" she suggested. "We're going to need something to do over the rest of the day. Besides," Lily added, "this way we'll be here if Remus wakes up or needs help." At this, everyone agreed to stay.
"Good idea, Lily," James murmured, giving her a light hug. The moment was broken by the sound of violent vomiting nearby.
"Let's get going, then," Jesse said in a sarcastically bright voice. They laughed and went to the nurse's office to gather materials.
The time passed much more quickly when they were busy helping people. It soon became apparent that most of the students had made themselves sick or hurt just so they could get a close-up view of Remus; no one knew that he was both vampire and werewolf, but it was apparent that something odd was happening to him. The students' curiosity was rather annoying, but there wasn't much anyone could do about it. Sick students were sick students, whether they wanted to be ill or not.
As night fell, a kind of hush came over the hospital wing. Everyone began to watch Remus more closely, and all the students were pinching themselves to stay awake. The unlucky ones who had been given sleeping potions carefully dumped their draughts into their pitchers of water or vaporized them with their wands. No one was going to miss what they'd come to hear.
Madam Pomfrey approached her five helpers.
"I suppose you'd better be off, then," she said with a small sigh. "I can handle anything that happens in the night."
"Maybe one of us should stay with you," Jesse said quickly. "We won't get much sleep tonight anyways, and this way you have help if you need it." The nurse hesitated; she obviously wanted to accept, but it was against her better judgment.
"But Professor Dumbledore-"
"Professor Dumbledore said we couldn't visit Remus at night," Sirius interrupted. "Not that we couldn't help you out." To everyone's relief, a smile crossed her face.
"Alright then," she consented, then became stern again. "But one word from the Headmaster, and you're out!" They all nodded, and she turned to go back to her office. "Whoever is staying to help me, there's a student in bed 12A who needs a sleeping potion."
They looked at each other uncertainly, then Sirius spoke up.
"Who's got dibs on that guy?" Jesse volunteered and went to get the potion while the others spread out, continuing whatever they'd been doing before.
Jesse filled a vial half-full of sleeping potion and took it to the student in bed 12A. He obviously needed it, so she stood by his bed to make sure he actually drank it. He did, but not happily. In moments, he was fast asleep.
She took the vial back to be cleaned, then looked around the room. A few students were still vomiting; they seemed to have used spells on themselves, and one or two had been a bit too strong for their own good. One girl was vomiting nonstop, and Lily had given her a bucket to keep by the bed.
Jesse turned to help a student next to her, who was coughing horribly. Suddenly, the coughs were drowned out by a blood-curdling scream. It echoed through the hospital wing and down the corridors, chilling everyone who heard it. Some of the students began to think they didn't want to be there, after all-the Marauders and the girls among them.
Jesse quickly tended to the coughing boy, who was looking very pale, and turned to find Remus. He was lying in his bed, wide awake. His arms were tied to the posts at the headboard, his legs at the other end. It was a humiliating position, and he seemed to realize that. As Jesse watched helplessly, he twisted and pulled at his bonds, his eyes that frightening yellow again. She reached out a shaking hand and touched his wrist lightly; he felt the feather-light touch and turned to her as if noticing her for the first time. His eyes flashed gray for a split second, and she shuddered at the anguish in them. No one deserved that kind of pain.
His face suddenly contorted in pain, his eyes squeezed shut and his mouth opened in another scream. Jesse kneeled by his bed and leaned her forehead against the side of the mattress, her hands wrapped loosely around his wrist. Perhaps her touch was comforting somehow, for he calmed down quickly afterward. She stood slowly and looked around the room, remembering her duties. A girl in the bed next to Remus' looked about to throw up, although she had come in complaining of a broken arm. Jesse ran to get a bucket, but Lily had it covered. On her way back out of the office, Jesse passed the mirror over the sink in Madam Pomfrey's bathroom; she was shocked to see tears streaming down her face.
"Now that won't do," she told her reflection firmly, wiping them away. "No need to upset the patients even more." She grabbed a sleeping potion and went back out to see who was in need of it.
The rest of the night was spent dishing out sleeping potions. Once the students realized there was nothing exciting or cool about Remus' suffering, they were keen to escape from it. As they weren't allowed to leave the hospital wing until the next day at the earliest, they suddenly wanted their discarded potions again.
But there simply wasn't enough of the potion to go around. Jesse gave everyone a half dose and hoped it would at least get them started on sleeping, even if it wouldn't stay in effect the whole night. She was tempted to give Remus a dose, as scream after scream ripped from his throat, but Pomfrey was adamant.
"The Headmaster says he needs to be awake during this time, or the monsters won't fight."
"But how is that bad?" Jesse asked incredulously.
"Isn't it better that he suffer now, and get rid of one of them, rather than take a sleeping draught before going to bed every night for the rest of his life?" Jesse nodded and turned to administer said potion to a student nearby.
Monday was far from fun for all of them. They'd gotten up early to pick up Remus before breakfast, but the nurse wouldn't let him leave. She told them firmly that he needed sleep more than food, and that they could come by shortly before class.
They'd done as told, though none of them were excited about letting him go to class on an empty stomach. James grabbed a piece of toast for him, but Remus didn't eat it, saying he didn't need anything. It was shoved in James' book bag and saved for later.
Classes had passed slowly. James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, and Jesse stared warily at Remus all day, half expecting him to collapse in seizures or something. This annoyed him greatly, as he felt perfectly fine in daytime- except for the fact that he was very tired, and direct sunlight made him feel sick. But, aside from those things, there was nothing wrong with him. He got enough odd looks from other students, some of whom he didn't even know, and he didn't need that from his friends as well.
After their final class, Sirius ate dinner quickly and escorted Remus up to the hospital wing on his own. They'd decided to take turns doing this, so Remus wouldn't feel too mothered. When they got back to Remus' bed, the ropes were already tied to the headboard and footboard, laying in ominous coils on the carefully made bed.
Sirius glanced cautiously at his friend, but Remus said nothing. He sat down on the bed, not bothering to use the sheets and blankets, and dutifully began tying his feet to the ropes. Reluctantly, Sirius helped. That done, Remus stretched out on the bed and held his hands up for Sirius to tie them down. Sirius was relieved when Madam Pomfrey arrived to help him; he felt sick tethering his friend to the bed, like a dangerous animal. And Remus' quiet acceptance was not helping-Sirius almost wished his friend would start kicking and screaming, put up some sort of fight...
When Remus was safely tied down, Sirius bade him a dull "good night" and left the hospital wing. There was only one person Sirius could blame for all this: Alyssa Mant. She'd bitten Remus, she'd started all this, and now she was going to hear from Sirius.
Sirius turned down a well-lit corridor, headed for the Ravenclaw common room. He'd been there many times, as he mostly dated girls from Ravenclaw, but realized when he got to the familiar portrait that he didn't know the new password. At the beginning of the school year, it had been 'butternut squash,' but it usually changed every month. How was he supposed to guess it now?
"Sunglasses," he tried, saying the first thing that popped into his head. The golden retriever wearing glasses and reading a book blinked at him sleepily, woken from his nap. "Purple cow, hedgehog spine. Uh...pumpkin patch? Christmas spirit. Yule log. Shit! How in hell-"
He stopped short when he saw the dog portrait swing forward. Before he had the chance to turn and hide, a young boy crawled through the hole in the wall and dropped to the ground. Sirius guessed he was about second year. The brown-haired boy looked up warily, checking to see that the hall was empty. When he saw Sirius, he gave an audible gasp and backed against the wall.
"Who are you?" he whispered as the portrait swung closed. The dog glared down at him disapprovingly but remained silent.
"Sirius Black," Sirius said amiably. "And you?"
"Er...Bobby Wilkins." Sirius grinned.
"Your real name? Don't worry, I'm not going to get you in trouble for being out past curfew. Have you noticed that I'm not in bed, either?" The boy seemed to relax a bit.
"That's true...alright. I'm Jason Mant." Sirius looked at him in surprise.
"You wouldn't happen to be related to Alyssa Mant?"
"Sure, she's my sister. I know I don't look like her, but she takes after my mom and I after my dad." Sirius nodded.
"I'll buy that. Odd, though. Your sister is who I'm here to see. She wouldn't happen to be up, would she?" Jason rolled his eyes.
"She has a boyfriend," he pointed out exasperatedly, as if he'd done this many times. Sirius laughed.
"I'm not here for that. I just...need to talk to her. Is she up, or what?" Jason shook his head.
"I don't think so. She isn't feeling so good. You can come back tomorrow, maybe after class. Password's 'leopard spots.'" Sirius thanked him and walked away from the portrait hole with him, hoping he'd be able to sneak back later that night.
"So what are you up for?" Sirius asked casually after a while. To his annoyance, they were walking in the general direction of the Gryffindor tower. With his luck, they'd walk all the way there before he'd be able to turn around and backtrack.
"Goin' to the kitchens," Jason admitted. "My friends dared me a few days ago. We're all taking turns doing stuff, and this was my assignment." Sirius grinned, pleased that there were others Marauding the school at such a young age.
"You got the good job," Sirius told him in a fatherly tone. "The kitchens are easy, and the elves will give you anything." Jason looked a little brighter.
"Yeah, that's what I've heard. Is it really that easy to get in there? It seems like it'd be better protected if it was forbidden to students." Sirius scoffed.
"Protected? The only thing you have to watch for is Filch, and he doesn't go down there much. Mrs. Norris, of course, loves the place-there's more rats there, 'cause of the food." Jason nodded, absorbing all the advice eagerly. Sirius looked sideways at him. "You do know how to get in there, right?" Jason looked away uncomfortably.
"Well...I know where it is, and I know which portrait it's behind, but I don't know the password or anything. I figured I'd just guess or something." Sirius laughed softly, careful to remain quiet now that they were in the heart of the school. Filch could be lurking anywhere.
"There is no password. On the portrait, just tickle the pear and it'll let you right in."
"Pear? What pear?" Sirius raised an eyebrow.
"What pear?" he echoed. "Well, well. Seems you have the wrong portrait, after all." He paused, weighing his options. "Tell you what: I'll go with you-just this once. Show you what to do, how to act around the elves." Jason grinned up at him.
"That'd be great!" Sirius shushed him quickly.
"Lesson number one: don't talk above a loud whisper except when absolutely necessary. Mrs. Norris could be anywhere." Jason nodded, looking as if he wished he had a notepad to write all this down on. Leave it to a Ravenclaw, Sirius thought to himself, rolling his eyes. But he found he quite liked the kid; he showed signs of being the next James Potter, or even (dare he think it?) the next Sirius Black. He grinned as this thought crossed his mind and decided then and there to take the boy under his wing, bring him up as the Marauder he had the potential to be.
They reached the corridor where the kitchens were and Sirius watched happily as Jason glanced around the room, looking for the pear. He spotted it quickly and tickled it just so-and the painting swung forward.
"Cool," Jason whispered, looking past the painting. There was no portrait hole, like in the common rooms, but a large hole cut out of the wall that reached from floor to ceiling. The painting was big enough to cover it all.
Sirius steered his charge through the doorway and into the kitchens, which were brightly lit as always. Immediately, half a dozen elves converged upon them, holding out platters covered with food and chatting happily to the boys. Jason looked around in awe, amazed at how easy it was to just take a bit of food and stick it in his pocket. Sirius was already filling his robes with food, occasionally eating some. Jason eventually followed suit, gathering enough to fill himself and his friends. Even when he was done, the elves offered more and more types of food.
"Are they always this chipper?" he asked around a piece of donut. Sirius nodded, swallowing a bite of freshly baked pie.
"Yeah, they'll always help you out-whether you want it or not. But don't tell your friends that," he added quickly. Jason looked up at him quizzically. "Lesson number two: play a prank whenever possible. When you go back tonight, give them the food and force them to thank you a million times for what you've done. Tell them you had to dodge both Filch and Norris, and that getting past the portrait involved answering a complicated riddle, and that the elves were vicious and tried to beat you up as you took the food." To Sirius' joy, Jason grinned.
"And that I barely made it out with my life, only to run into Mrs. Norris again," he added, getting into the spirit. "I had to run and hide in an old classroom for ten minutes before she finally left." Sirius laughed.
"Now you're getting it! Then, when they all come down with you next time, you'll have a great laugh."
"I think I've heard of you," Jason said suddenly. Sirius waited for him to continue. "I wasn't sure before, but now I am...you're one of the Marauders, right?" Sirius grinned.
"You got it! The one and only Sirius Black. Remember that name-it'll be all over the papers someday!"
"This is so cool! Now I can tell everyone that I was taught by the infamous Sirius Black! You have no idea how popular this will make me among the guys." Sirius laughed, flattered.
"Well! Never realized how much of an impact I have on the little ones..." He grinned mischievously. "This calls for some serious corruption of young minds..." Jason looked up at him expectantly, but Sirius shook his head. "No, no. You'll find out what I'm planning when the rest of them do." Or when I do, he added silently. Lesson number three: never let anyone know when you haven't got a plan. But Jason would have to learn that one by himself; it was getting early, and they had to get moving before someone got up and found them.
"Okay, back to bed. We can't get caught now that we've performed the deed, that'd be even worse than beforehand." Jason nodded and followed him out of the kitchens. Sirius left him at the entrance hall. "You think you can get back to Ravenclaw without getting caught?"
"Sure I can, I've been taught by the best!" Sirius laughed and waved good- bye. Jason didn't realize it, but he still had plenty to learn if he wanted to live up to his teacher.
Sirius made it to the Gryffindor common room without incident and sank into an armchair to wait for the others. It was already dawn, and there was no use in going back to bed so soon before breakfast. Despite all he'd eaten, his stomach growled in anticipation of the meal.
It was odd, now that he thought about it. He'd gone to the Ravenclaw portrait in anticipation of finding Alyssa and chewing her out about Remus. Making her feel awful. Making her do something to stop his pain. Instead, he'd found her brother and had spent the whole night pleasantly teaching him a bit of what he knew. He'd grown to like the boy, despite how much he hated Alyssa.
Sirius eventually dropped off to sleep, despite himself. James and Peter left him there when they went down to breakfast, and as a result, he was only able to catch the last few minutes of it. He'd been woken up by Lily and Jesse, but had been slow in dressing and getting ready. He crammed a sausage into his mouth and watched sadly as the rest of the food disappeared.
"Alright, we've got Charms first," James announced as they stood up and gathered their things. "Let's go get Remus and see if he's feeling up to going to class." They followed James to the hospital wing and to Remus' bed. It was empty.
"He's already on his way to class," Madam Pomfrey explained, approaching them and looking quite worn out. She had a bucket in one hand and a pepper- up potion in the other. "Too bad you all have to go to class today...I could really use some help." They all sympathized, then thanked her for telling them where Remus was. She sighed heavily when they went off to join him, and James had the distinct feeling she was hinting at them to skip class and help her out.
Professor Flitwick was his usual perky self that morning. He beamed at each student as he or she filed into the classroom, then hopped up onto his pile of books just as the bell rang. James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, and Jesse all sat next to or near Remus, who was already seated in the second row. He smiled at them, but said nothing. He looked very tired, even more so than Sirius. Nevertheless, when the professor had explained what charm they'd be practicing and had set them loose in pairs, he jumped up from his seat, his eyes alight, and looked actually excited about practicing the charm. Charms and Transfiguration were Remus' best classes, and he usually didn't care much about practicing them since they came to him so easily.
"Why so excited today?" Sirius asked casually. He was partnered with James, Remus with Peter, and Lily with Jesse. They were all working right next to each other, though, and basically acted as one large group. Remus shrugged in response to Sirius' question.
"Anything's better than lying in that damned hospital wing all day." Sirius agreed with a nervous laugh, then turned to perform the charm on James. A beam of purple light shot out of the end of his wand, and James' hair turned bright orange.
"Oh, excellent, Mr. Black!" Professor Flitwick exclaimed, hurrying over to inspect his student's hair. "You've performed a perfect Color-Change charm on Mr. Potter's hair!" Half the class laughed behind their hands; they were supposed to be performing the charm on various blocks of wood and strips of parchment. James gave Sirius a friendly glare as the professor went away again, squeaking excitedly.
"Perfect except that you missed," he pointed out in an undertone. Sirius flashed him a Marauder grin.
"Who says I missed?" Everyone nearby laughed happily, and Lily changed James' hair back to normal.
After all their classes that day, it was James' turn to take Remus to the hospital wing for the night. Sirius gave him a sympathetic glance and went back to his dinner. Shortly afterwards, though, he stood and grabbed his things, a strange look on his face.
"Where are you going?" Jesse asked with a slight frown. She didn't like the odd gleam in his eyes. "Sirius?" He shook his head.
"Just to the common room." She stood up, too.
"Then I'll join you. I'm done here anyways." Sirius shot her a meaningful glare, which she ignored.
"I can make it up to the common room on my own, I think I know where it is by now," he told her lightly, rolling his eyes. But Jesse knew he was planning something else. By the looks on Peter's and Lily's faces, they knew too.
"Well, you can help me with my books, then," Jesse said cheerfully, but firmly. Sirius looked at Peter and Lily, who were staring at him, and realized that if he didn't let Jesse go with him, they all would.
"Fine, you can walk along in my presence," he said with a grin. "But you're carrying your own damn books." Jesse laughed and grabbed her bag, then followed Sirius out of the hall. He was walking quickly, as if trying to lose her. She matched his pace.
"It's not going to be that easy," she scolded, panting along beside him. Sirius was certainly stronger than she, and appeared to be rushing along effortlessly. He shot her a look when she continued to keep up with him. He was obviously annoyed, and not very good at hiding the fact.
"Why do you insist on coming with me?" he asked irritably. She gave him an appraising look.
"Because I know that look in your eye as well as anyone else, and I don't like it. You're planning something, and nothing good can come of it." Sirius rolled his eyes.
"So you think you're going to stop me."
"Yes, I do." She grinned. "That's the job of the little sister, isn't it? To keep her older brother out of trouble?" Sirius couldn't help but smile back, but he was still annoyed that he wasn't going to be able to shake her off.
"Well, if you won't leave me alone, you're going to have to witness what I'm going to do." She shrugged.
"So I will."
"You're not going to like it," Sirius warned.
"It's not going to happen," Jesse reminded him. "I'm not going to let it." Sirius rolled his eyes again and turned right towards the Ravenclaw common room. The dog looked at him in confusion when he supplied the correct password, but swung forward anyway.
"How did you know the password?" Jesse asked suspiciously.
"Marauder-in-training," was all he replied.
They climbed through the portrait hole and into the Ravenclaw common room, which was practically empty. No one spared them a second glance as they entered the room, which was remarkably like the Gryffindor common room. Sirius glanced around, then approached an armchair by the fire. The back of someone's blonde head was barely visible over the top. Jesse grabbed his arm and held him back, realizing whom he'd come to see.
"What do you think you're doing?" she hissed, dragging him back to the portrait hole where they could talk without Alyssa hearing them. He glared at her, trying to pull out of her grip.
"Giving that bitch a piece of my mind!" Jesse tightened her hold on his arm.
"Like hell you are! What d'you think you're going to say?" Sirius shrugged.
"Whatever comes out. Let go!" Jesse glared at him furiously and held on even more tightly.
"No. I'm not letting you do this-it's completely pointless! We're all upset about Remus, but screaming at Alyssa isn't going to help anything!" Her voice was about normal volume again, and Alyssa heard her name. She turned around in her chair to see who was talking about her.
"Black? What are you doing here?" she hissed, getting up and approaching them. An essay for Professor Binns was clutched in her hand. "How did you get into my common room?"
"You have a very kind brother," Sirius replied with a sneer. Alyssa blanched.
"What did you do to him?" she whispered dangerously. Others in the common room were now staring at them, having realized there were two non- Ravenclaws in their midst.
"Nothing. He gave me the password willingly." Sirius paused a moment. "He really is a cool kid." Alyssa glared at him venomously.
"What are you doing here, Black?" She glanced from him to Jesse and back again. Sirius finally tore his arm from Jesse's grip and turned to face Alyssa squarely.
"I want to talk about Remus," he said bluntly, then glanced around the room. "Let's go somewhere less...public, though." Alyssa looked around as well, then glared at him again.
"And why would I want to do that?" she hissed. "I don't particularly feel like talking to you, I have an essay to finish." With that, she turned to go back to her chair. Sirius grabbed the essay as she turned and whipped it out of her hand.
"What essay?" he murmured, shoving it into his pocket. Jesse gaped at him, Alyssa glared at him, and their audience muttered angrily amongst themselves. Sirius crossed his arms in front of him, waiting for Alyssa to say something. She glanced around, then rolled her eyes.
"Fine, come up to my dorm room," she finally agreed, though she looked far from happy about it. Sirius followed her up the spiral staircase, her essay still crammed into his pocket, Jesse at his side. She looked ready to hex him if he did or said anything too stupid.
Alyssa pulled chairs from one corner of the room and sat them facing her own bed, then gestured for Sirius and Jesse to sit down. She sat on her bed, leaning against the wall and watching them warily.
"What do you want to say, then? Just get out with it, and then I can get back to work." Sirius stood behind his chair and leaned on it, staring angrily at Alyssa. He suddenly realized he didn't know what he wanted to say; he'd expected the words to just come to him, but they weren't. He looked to Jesse for help, but she shook her head firmly and looked away. "Well?" Alyssa prompted, annoyance prominent in her voice.
"You-" Sirius began, hoping that by starting to talk, something would happen. But his mind remained blank. "Come with me," he said finally. If he couldn't tell her, he could show her. Alyssa snorted.
"Like hell I will. If you don't have anything to say, just give me my essay and get out of my common room." Sirius glared at her furiously. She wasn't cooperating! How was he supposed to prove a point to her if she wouldn't do as he said? He grabbed her essay out of his pocket and held it up for her to see, then turned and strode from the room.
Jesse watched him go angrily. Sirius was being such an idiot...what was he hoping to gain by doing this? Alyssa's face was turning red, and she glared at Jesse as if this was her fault.
"Get your boyfriend to give me my essay back!" she yelled. Jesse looked at her in surprise.
"He's not my boyfriend, and I have no control over what he does," she said evenly. Despite herself, she was getting rather angry; what right did Alyssa have to get angry with her? She hadn't done anything.
Alyssa bit back a frustrated scream, then followed Sirius out of the room. Jesse sighed, then joined her.
They followed Sirius all the way to the hospital wing, always a step or two behind him. He kept her essay in plain view, but was careful to keep her from getting it. He wondered, as they entered the wing, why she didn't go straight to Madam Pomfrey and report him. The truth was, she was a bit curious, despite herself.
Sirius went straight for Remus' bed, hoping Madam Pomfrey wouldn't kick them out before he could prove his point to Alyssa. She came up behind him and, before he could stop her, grabbed her essay.
"You idiot!" she hissed, shoving the paper into her pocket. "Don't you ever do that again! Stay away from my things, stay away from me, stay-" But she was cut off mid-sentence by a loud scream from the bed next to her. She looked in shock at the bed, staring through the darkness to see who it was. Remus stared back at her, his eyes blazing yellow and narrowed ferociously. She watched, transfixed, as his scream subsided and his eyes became steel gray again. He looked at her, trying to figure out who she was, or perhaps why she was there. Only moments later, his eyes became pain-filled, then flashed yellow again. He opened his mouth in another scream, showing sharp vampire teeth. Sirius turned to Alyssa angrily.
"See what you've done to him?" he hissed when the hospital wing was silent again. Jesse had moved around them and was at the head of Remus' bed, gently stroking his arm, which was tied to the head of the bed. Alyssa shuddered and looked away, straight into Sirius' eyes.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I did no such thing." She was visibly shaken, the echoes of the screams replaying in her mind, but her voice was clear and even.
"Don't try to deny it!" Sirius said warningly. "You made him a vampire, knowing full well that he's already a werewolf!" Alyssa gasped, her eyes suddenly very wide.
"He's a-a what?!" she hissed. Sirius stared at her for a moment.
"You mean...you didn't know that?" His voice had lost all of its anger, his expression was almost perplexed now. Alyssa shook her head. "Then...all this...it was an accident?" She stared shamefully at her feet.
"I wouldn't say that," she mumbled. "I-I meant to bite him, I just didn't know it would...do this." Sirius shifted his weight.
"You followed your instincts, you mean," he said quietly. "That still wasn't right. You knew you'd either pass on the curse, or kill him." Alyssa nodded.
"I know, but I couldn't control myself. It had been so long...and I knew his taste by that time, it was awful to know that he was within my reach, but I wasn't doing anything about it. Then one night, I just...couldn't take it anymore. I lost control, let the vampire do as she wished..." She heaved a sigh and looked up to meet Sirius' eyes. "I'm sorry. I know it was wrong, but..." Then, to her surprise, Sirius nodded.
"You followed your instincts," he repeated. "I understand." He sighed and looked her straight in the eye. "And I forgive you. You didn't wish this," he gestured to Remus, who was lying quite still, "on him, you just acted without thinking. You couldn't have known." Alyssa stared at him in shock, then threw her arms around his neck.
"Thank you, thank you! I never thought you'd understand..." Sirius shrugged, and she let him go.
"Well, I figure it's kind of the same with werewolves as with vampires..." Alyssa nodded, tears in her eyes.
"I'm so sorry, for you and for him!" she whispered. "I never meant for this to happen...I even felt bad the next morning, after I'd done it, even though I didn't know I'd done more than infect him. I hate cursing other people...but it just comes naturally." Sirius sighed and nodded.
"You can go, I guess," he said finally. "But you'll have to tell all this to Remus when he's feeling better." Alyssa looked rather pale at that, but agreed. It was, after all, only to be expected. She flashed Sirius a thankful smile, then retreated back to her common room.
Jesse half listened to the conversation, making sure Sirius didn't get out of hand. She was rather shocked that he told Alyssa of Remus' curse, but the girl needed to know about it to understand what was really going on.
Most of her attention, however, was focused on Remus. He was looking at her, his gray eyes boring into hers, with an odd expression on his face. She rubbed her hand up and down his arm, wrist to elbow and back, hoping it was somewhat comforting. He seemed to have stopped screaming, at any rate.
But the look in his eyes was somewhat disconcerting. It wasn't malicious, or anything bad, but Jesse couldn't quite understand it, and it bothered her. She had been best friends with Remus for ten years, and was used to knowing everything he was thinking. But since she'd come back to England and found him again, she'd realized she never knew just what was on his mind. He was almost always angry with her, which she couldn't even begin to understand, but there was more than that. He never looked at her as he used to, and he seemed forever careful to keep his thoughts hidden from her. From her first day at Hogwarts, she'd found herself drifting away from him. The more time she spent with him, the more he felt like a stranger.
But that wasn't quite right, either. Recently, he'd been acting more civil towards her again. He still closed off his thoughts, still refused to let her get as close as they used to be, but he was more friendly now. Jesse supposed it had started on karaoke night; he'd certainly seemed different then. But shortly afterward, he'd closed off and become cruel towards her again. So when had she noticed a definite change?
A few days ago, she finally decided. The day he woke up after Alyssa's attack. He'd given her this same, strange look that day, too, as if deciding something about her. Whenever she'd visited after that, he'd been just as friendly with her as with the others.
Had he forgiven her for whatever terrible thing she'd done?
But that didn't seem possible. They hadn't talked about it even once-Jesse still didn't know why he was so angry.
Then again, that was just like Remus. He rarely wanted to get into rows about things, preferring to ignore the topic until it went away. Hadn't he done that to her enough times, especially the first few days? Refusing to discuss a sensitive topic, necessary as it may be to talk about, was something Remus was known for among his friends.
Jesse sighed and pulled a chair forward with her free hand. She settled onto it and leaned forward, her right hand still on Remus' arm.
"How are you feeling?" she whispered. He smiled slowly.
"I'm okay, actually," he replied in a quiet voice. He was hoarse from screaming so much, but did indeed look relatively calm.
"Does it-does it still hurt? Even now?" He considered her question.
"No...only when they're actively fighting." Jesse knew from his eyes that it had been a lie, and wondered briefly why he'd said that.
"That's good," she said, playing along. If he was going to lie, he had a reason, and she didn't want to put him in an uncomfortable situation. As if he already isn't, she thought bitterly, eyeing the ropes around his wrists with hate. He followed her gaze and gave another little smile.
"I hardly notice they're there, half the time," he lied again. Why is he lying about all this? Like he's shielding me from the truth or something...
"That's good, too." She paused. "They seem to be pretty calm right now. It's been a few minutes since anything has...happened." Remus nodded.
"Don't know why, they're usually really active right now. Maybe one of them is finally winning..." A glimmer of hope welled up in Jesse. If one of the monsters was beating the other, that meant he'd soon be free!
"That's wonderful!" she whispered. Remus gave a light laugh and looked away, and the hope died in her. It had been another lie. She looked up at Sirius to find him receiving a tight hug from Alyssa. This shocked her greatly, and she almost laughed out loud. So Sirius had quelled his anger, after all. That was certainly a first...
Jesse looked back at Remus, who was staring at her again. She noticed, not for the first time, how interesting his eyes were. Though mostly a dark gray, they were shot through with silver and black. There was a twinge of color, a dark green, around the outer edges of his irises. She thought she could remember a time when his eyes had been all green, but that had been so long ago...when they were toddlers. And besides, that didn't make any sense. Why would his eyes have changed so drastically?
Something Sirius had said a long time ago came to the surface of her mind. "...he was young at the time-I think four, maybe five." Jesse gave a small gasp. Then...his eyes had once been green! They must have changed when he was bitten.
She shook her head. But Sirius must have been wrong. Remus couldn't have been bitten when he was that young, or she would have known! How could he have hidden it from her for five years?
Remus had heard her gasp, and was staring at her expectantly. She locked eyes with him and gave his wrist a gentle squeeze.
"Remus? We need to talk."
Sirius watched Alyssa go, not quite believing what had just happened. He'd forgiven her...was he even allowed to do that? It was Remus' place to forgive or not to. He was the one who was truly suffering.
But that wasn't quite true. Remus had to deal with the physical pain, but his friends had to live knowing that he was suffering so much, and they could do nothing. Sirius had simply forgiven Alyssa for bringing that kind of tension upon the group, not for biting Remus. Well, he'd done that too...but she understood that it was only his forgiveness, not Moony's.
Didn't she?
Sirius shook his head to clear it. Whether she understood or not, she would soon enough. As soon as Remus was feeling better-and he would be, and very soon-they could talk. Not that Remus would want to...it wasn't really his thing to discuss delicate subjects. But they would talk eventually. They had the whole school year, for goodness' sake!
He was about to turn and see how Remus was doing when he heard something he wasn't sure he was ever going to hear.
"Remus?" Jesse whispered. "We need to talk." And then, unbelievably, miraculously, Remus agreed.
"Okay." Did he understand what she meant? For it was obvious to Sirius, just from the tone in her voice. But perhaps Remus didn't quite know what she wanted to discuss... "I guess I've put this off long enough."
Well, that settled it. Remus knew exactly what he'd gotten himself into. Sirius smiled and slipped away without saying anything. He found Madam Pomfrey and pulled her aside.
"Remus and Jesse are talking," he said quietly. Her eyes narrowed, and she looked about to say something, but Sirius was quicker. "I know Dumbledore said not to visit him at night, but this is really important. And besides, he's tied up and she has enough common sense to keep her distance." The nurse glanced over to where the two were, still looking disagreeable. "They really need to talk," Sirius repeated. Pomfrey gave an exasperated sigh.
"Fine. I'll give her half an hour." With that, she walked off. Sirius grinned as he left the hospital wing. He knew that, despite what she said, she'd give them as much time as they needed. Madam Pomfrey's definition of half an hour was very different from most.
When Sirius finally crawled into bed that night, he fell asleep almost immediately. He'd made peace with Alyssa, Remus was making peace with Jesse, and everything was beginning to look much better...
