Title: No Sense In Running
Disclaimer: Purely for entertainment. No infringement intended.
Pairings: Possible Faith/Jess, possible Faith/Buffy.
Rating: R for language, themes
CHAPTER 3
- You were sitting your fingers like fuses
Your eyes, like cinnamon...Stolen Car, Beth Orton
The vampire walked down the dark and deserted street, beside his pal. Angel watched as they passed him, and one muttered something about a slayer being in town.
He stepped into the phone box and lifted the receiver, and tapped in some numbers from memory. He waited until someone responded and then cleared his throat.
'Hey, Dawn, is your sister home?'
He listened intently for an answer that would allow all to become clear.
'No, she's outta town, but can I take a message? Can I ask who's calling?'
He hung up the phone and stepped out of the phone box, and looked ahead. He began heading down the street and muttered to himself, 'Thank god it ain't the other one.'
- - -
The gentle purr of the engine rumbled beneath the group as they drove along the barely lit street. The warm air drifted into the car through the open windows, and made a gentle whooshing noise, the only apparent sound being made in their presence.
Buffy shifted into third after turning a corner, and sighed. Everyone was being silent, concentrating on the streets and the moving bodies in them. Or the lack of. She sensed the eeriness straight-off, it had become a second nature for her. As she glanced across at Wes in the passenger's seat, she noticed the apprehension in his face.
'Why didn't you call me sooner?' she finally said, her tone blunt, but a tone of calmness managed to overwhelm it.
He looked over at her and sucked in a breath, before wiping his mouth over with the palm of his hand. 'I didn't know until today.'
'I mean about Angel…'
'You mean Angelu-'
'I've been down that road before with him, if it's the mind-walk you're after I can get straight to it.' She lowered her voice. 'If I can seek him out.'
'I know…this is hard for you, Buffy, but Faith-'
'Doesn't know how to reach him…not the way I do,' she interrupted, again, her voice employing a rather harsh tone.
Wesley took a deep breath and looked briefly at his weapons. 'Why don't you just have a little faith?'
'Already had my share, can't say I was all with the warm fuzzies, not that she isn't good at 'em,' she quipped. 'I'm referring to Faith's idea of 'caring' for someone. Doesn't mean trying to kill their friends and take away everything else they have. But apparently she thinks that it does.' She exchanged a look with Wes and then concentrated on the road.
'Faith's changed, Buffy.'
'As far as I'm concerned, she'll never change. Only thing I ever saw in her was power, then evil, in that order. Of course…her idea of being a slayer wasn't exactly taken for a bet.'
Wes glanced over his shoulder at Gunn and Fred, to see their curious faces looking his way.
He looked back over at Buffy and exhaled. 'Buffy, Faith isn't exactly a saint, I agree, but she's-'
'I think we just passed him, Wes.' Buffy frowned and looked in her wing mirror. Her foot eased up on the accelerator and she shifted down a gear.
'Who, Angelu-'
'Do me a favour, Wes; no questions.' By this moment she'd brought the car to a complete halt and was already unfastening her seatbelt and getting out of the car.
'I-'
'Just keep lookin' for Faith, I'm gonna hang back, and see if I can catch up with him. He can't go too far now that I'm this close to him.'
Wesley nodded his head in agreement, having realised almost straightaway that stopping her wouldn't work. Plus, she knew what she was doing. If she was this confident about being able to do the whole mind-walk with him, then all he could do was let her to it.
'Here. You might need this, in case he gets too feisty,' he said, handing her the tranq-gun. He shifted over into the driver's seat and pressed his lips together, and looked into her eyes a moment. 'Be careful.' He pressed his foot down on the accelerator, heading away from her, and she began to walk backwards, watching them drive away, then turned on her heel and ran in the opposite direction.
- - -
As the tyres ran through the sand, the car slowed, and when it came to an eventual halt, a car door slammed, and footsteps were created as Jess trod through the dry sand towards the ocean.
I hung back, just letting her be for a moment. I looked down at my cigarette packet and grabbed it. Thank god for night-time gas stations.
I sucked it up and exhaled long, and silently. Safe. I loved the feeling. Of the smoke. The tobacco…what it did to me. Sure, whatever, I could die from it, but what the hell…could die from an axe. Seems more likely.
I flicked away the burnt ash and watched it flying away into the ocean air. It could go anywhere it wanted now…it was free. But me…I'll always be trapped.
She sat in the sand and hugged her knees to her chest and I watched as I sat upon the bonnet of the car, the warmness of the metal comforting to me. I pulled my leg in towards me, and let the other just stay. Soon my eyes were rolling back into my head and my eyelids were falling closed. They stung so much, I'd forgotten the feeling. Never got tired inside. Had too much energy buzzin' through me.
Sounds like something a hunter would say. I could feel it runnin' the course of my veins, pumping, like adrenaline, only smarter…it was oxygenating and breathtaking at the same time. Cos without it, I'd die, but with it, I would kill. The blood was like…a drill in my ear. Buzzing, yelling at me to do something with all my energy. And hunting down that flesh would burn up that energy good for me.
Huh.
'Shit, Jess,' I mumbled and opened my eyes. I was trying to keep an eye on her behaviour, just in case if she did something stupid. But I dunno.
The girl's smart. A hell of a lot smarter than I'll ever be. But she's just as fiery, pent up about everything as I am. Ballsy, beautiful. I dunno. She could go AWOL.
It seems strange. Thinking that she's a 'potential' Slayer. And we get on so well.
Once we were training together, doin' sit ups. I remember how we twisted our legs in together so we were anchored. We'd been talking about why we always trained.
Turns out my reason was exactly the same as hers. Cos we're fighters. For when they come for us. Or for when we go for them. Either way. We need to be prepared.
Naturally all that training makes me ballsy and hungry for some sort of kill, and patrol used to settle that tingle I get. But since I was inside…obviously not gonna start stakin' the inmates.
But it was hilarious. I was about to tell her how patrol would go down, how juiced I would get from knowing I could dust a vamp, got shivers right down to my toes, and she chimes in, tellin' me how her Watcher would take her out patrollin' and she'd find herself jonesin' for someone to put it there for her, the slaying a turn on from the rush of adrenaline.
Made me think about how B said she desired 'low fat yoghurts.' Sure.
Point is, the rush, the true feeling we both get from slaying. Hearing B's reaction disheartened me a little, but I kinda felt 'in place' when I talked about it with Jess.
'Seriously; the buzz is eccentric, there's nothin' like it,' she said as she tried to catch her breath.
'Tell me about it,' I said, still doin' sit-ups…seventy-five, seventy-six…
'Nothin' like a hot fix to finish off the night perfectly, though.'
'I reinforce my statement.'
'But I was never about the special thing. Do me, I'll be satisfied. OH…well…dependin' on the skills a brotha's willin' to play, can't be havin' none of that soft shit, it's gotta be hard, fast…I like an element of power.'
'It's a real rush…'
'What do you think they feel?'
I always thought I felt sex more than others. Cos I was so aware of my senses (touch more than anything), and all this strength, whatever. I always thought that the rushes and the tingles and the ecstasy's were more intense. Could be a Slayer thing. Could just be hormones.
I opened my eyes and before me was the same image as when I closed them. The ocean. The moonlight shining down on it. Jess, sitting still, looking out towards the ocean.
What could I do but stay away, let her be. My whole life I've been travellin' around in a tight circle…consisting of me…and me. That's how much I trusted peoples. Never did. Until B. Then everything that happened between us sparked off my violent shell…the need to be tough, to look after my own.
Jess came along and has been nothing but there for me. She's been a friend. A friend. To me.
I found myself sitting down beside her, and dragging fingers along the smooth skin on her upper arm. She looked towards me, her eyes red and sore from where she'd been sobbing.
'For the first time in my life, I'm crying because I lost someone I cared about,' she said distantly, her eyes still on the ocean. I felt deprived of her attention and I placed my arm on her back, then slid it around her shoulder. She leant in close to me, and I brought my other arm up to hold her, and soon her arms were holding me.
'It's so hard,' I told her gently, not meaning to distort any thoughts in her mind. Just…wanted to let her know that I knew how she felt.
- - -
Never thought I would end up here, in front of someone I thought I'd said goodbye to for good. Never occurred to me that she could be here. Why would she be? Not enough problems back in Sunnydale?
So it happened like this. I was driving around town (after the beach) trying to think where to go. Ended up bumpin' into Angel's crowd, and Wes gave me the evilest eyes, would think I trampled on his book or somethin'; well, that and I tried to kill him, and broke outta jail right in front of him. Think he was slightly against me breakin' outta jail.
So Jess and I explained to him what we were doin' out of jail. That we were headed to Sunnydale to get with the Scoobs, find out what the deal is with this whole apocalypse trip. Wes told me he they were dealin' with their own kind of apocalypse right back here, and I wondered why I'd heard nothin' of it.
Wes explained to me what was goin' on with Angel, that his soul had tripped out on him, he needed me to…fix him.
So he sent me in the direction of him, Jess stayed behind with himself, Gunn (hot!) and Fred. Offered to set me up with Gunn's shotgun but I told him it was a salvage operation not a search and destroy. My boy's been there for me so long, I'm not about to pull the nasty on him.
So I headed out to this old, abandoned warehouse, pitch black, smelly. Had no sign of him there. Til I saw this body moving around in the darkness, talking to what seemed like themselves.
I climbed up a few metal stairs and jumped across a few boxes, tryin' a get closer to this person. Then I saw.
Her.
I couldn't believe how fast all that hate and anger flooded back to me, reminded me straight away of years ago, when I first met her, the girly girl she was.
Still is.
But ouch. She hit him hard across the face. Slapped him hard. He chuckled. Bone-chilling laugh. Not the laugh I knew him to have. It was so different. Colder.
This wasn't my Angel.
I stumbled over a few metal bars and fell down a floor to where he was, and he turned, saw me, and the smile fell from his face. His eyes pierced mine, good and hard. Still had the same effect. Melted away my tough exterior. But I couldn't. couldn't let her see me as the calm, collected Faith that had learned how to deal with her 'killing' issues. No. she had to see that I was still as tough and hard as ever. Better. Better than her.
But when he looked at me, his face free of expression, his eyes penetrating me deep, I stood. Still.
'Faith,' he said, seemingly surprised.
'Faith,' came that lighter, more bouncy tone from behind him, and I glanced at her.
I ignored her and looked into Angel's- I mean…Angelus's eyes. 'Angelus.'
'Well!' he started. 'Fancy that. Two slayers, here to cook me up a lil storm! How'd you break out Faith? Snap the necks of your prison guards? Cos I wouldn't put it past ya, I've seen you crack some neat tricks over the years including trying to kill off your sister slayer.'
'What are you doing here?' Buffy asked me gently, her voice echoing through the warehouse.
I took a step back, seeing Angelus take a step towards me. B's words went straight over my head, and I looked at Angelus, the smile upon his face frozen from emotion.
Too much detail goin' on to explain the whole fiasco, but one thing I gotta tell for sure is how messed up the Angel crew are.
- - -
So apparently the others took care of the demon thing that blocked out the sun. Fair enough. Wasn't about to get my fist on, in terms of connecting it with brick wall type demons, and ouching about how my bones got crumbled. Had Angelus for that.
I don't understand why, but it seemed Angelus was more keen on understanding why I was there, and not his precious lover B. Turned on her, punched her hard in the gut and sent her flying over the poles of the scaffolding down to the ground. I didn't see where she landed but I figured she must be knocked out, if not, worse. A floor of concrete down could shatter your skull let alone bring on the tweeties.
I looked at him, his cold glare a freakish nightmare I was hesitant to explore. No thank you. But it seemed I was the one set up for the job, I couldn't back out. Angel had been there for me. I couldn't just back out on him now.
As it always is, we ended up battling it out, me trying to get him down, him not having any of it. It ended up with the shot gun I'd taken from Gunn (just in case) landing in his hands, and with him taunting me with it, me at the foot of the stairs, him, on them, pointing the gun in the direction of my head. I glanced over at Buffy, who sure was knocked out on the floor, and silently wished she'd wake up.
What was I thinking, I didn't need her. Sure, I got myself into these situations but I could get myself out. No help needed. Especially not hers.
He cocked the gun and chuckled, watching my anxious eyes looking up into the cold emptiness of his.
'Wow… you really have gone soft, now haven't you? Hey, you remember that time you tried to get Angel to kill you because you felt all weepy over being such a bad little girl? Do you still feel that way? Do you still want to die?' His tone was so piercing. He really knew how to reach me, could scrape against my insides with his voice and know that he was scratchin' me out and he could just watch. As I squirmed and admitted how pathetic I was. WAS. Let's keep it in the past tense.
'No,' I muttered under my breath, hoping he'd let it slide just as easily as he did years ago, when he was comforting, and gentle.
'What's that?'
'No…' Again I muttered under my breath, and this time he taunted me with his words rather than the gun.
'I can't hear you…!'
'No!' I finally exploded. Yes. He managed to reach me again, get right into my spot where all defences tried so hard to keep hidden.
He cocked his gun and I clamped my eyes shut and clenched my jaw hoping to god this wouldn't be it.
'Too bad… 'cause you're gonna.'
He racked his gun again, and again, and soon I realised what he was doing. My eyes came open to this sight before me and a little bit of my emotion stumbled upon me as I let out a breath I was holding. Thank FUCK.
It seemed he had a lot of strength in him, and he managed to kick me down, and leave me there. Then came the wicked part.
So it turns out Wes found this weird Orpheus shit. A type of enchanted drug as it is. Apparently the effects are wicked trendy. No apparently needed anymore. Trendy with a capital T. Vamps suck off humans, they go all whack and trippy, the effects last for a hella long time.
I didn't realise the trip would be just as trendy for me, being super-strengthy, being able to surpass whatever. But not for me.
The mind walk told me all I needed to know about Angel, he saved some people and things, reversed it by succumbing to his vampish tendencies and the rest is history.
I woke up to havoc back at Angel's and ended up having to knock out his kid, Connor, must have had a feisty hate for him, I caught him trying to kill him. Too much history in it I'm guessing.
But it all played out okay. Willow helped fix things, I kept Connor from becoming stab-happy. All settled down fine.
I watched him as he watched LA city and it's many colourful lights, his elbows leaning upon the balcony bars. I ran my hand up and down them as I watched him thinking about what I'd just said.
'We never stop fighting,' he mused gently, and I closed my eyes a moment, the thought of stopping appealing to me.
'Hey, I was gonna but then someone got all pep-talky on me.'
We exchanged words a little longer and he smiled as I playfully punched him on the arm. Our laughs died down and my face became serious.
'Angel, I…' I began, but realised that what I would say might just complicate things. 'Buffy's erm…' I scrunched my forehead, wondering how to end the sentence fast.
'Expecting you?'
I gazed into his wide eyes and smiled a little. 'Yeah…' I blinked and looked away from him. 'I should make a move…' I said, draggin' my words out and stepping away from the balcony railing.
'I'm so glad you were here to help me, Faith,' he told me, stepping away from the railing also, and standing, just inches from me, his beautiful self concentrated on me.
I flashed a grin at him and then nodded acceptingly.
'I mean it, I wouldn't have it any other way…'
'And there was me thinkin' B was ready to give you the mind trip all focussed and shit…'
'Ah, that's her.'
'Yeah, focussed alright.'
Silence.
'But your calling is just as important.'
'Yeah n' you want me fightin' at her side…'
'It's the only way to fight this war.'
'So you know?'
He shrugged, and as I looked up into his eyes and watched him resolve this inside his head, I thought about how beautiful he truly was.
'Like I said. We never stop fighting.'
