The Malfoy Code of Conduct
Author's Note: I began posting this a few months back as a kind of preface to future fanfiction I have planned. However, it was deleted as this was reported as not a story, but a list. It was true, I suppose. So I've written a story around it now. Hopefully it won't ruin the Code itself.
Disclaimer:I am in no way affiliated with Harry Potter, JKRowling, or Warner Brothers. No money is being made off of this.
Ethan Malfoy, son of Draco Malfoy, and the latest of the Malfoy line lay sprawled over his bed, glaring up at the ceiling. Two days ago he had received for his thirteenth birthday, amongst other things, a giant tome on which the words, "Malfoy Code of Conduct" were inscribed.
This present, while clearly the most important to be given to him, also caught his attention least. After all, if one must choose between the newest racing broomstick and a big dusty book...it really is an easy choice for most kids.
He had thanked him parents and promptly gone outside with his friends to play Quidditch. His parents hadn't minded. Draco, his father, understood the drudging task of reading their family's list of rules and regulations.
"Most of the rules," Draco had said, "Are a bit ridiculous and you can easily get away with not following. Really, the secret to The Malfoy Code of Conduct is common sense. As long as you use that, you should be fine."
And so, knowing that he was expected to read it before Winter Holidays came to a close, he had taken it upon himself to finally read the book.
He stared at the leather bound cover morosely. The title stood out, printed in silver, and the Malfoy emblem sat at the bottom of the cover. It looked like any other older book that could be found in the vast library on the four floor of the Malfoy Manor in Wiltshire.
His father had assured him, however, that the book was not a thousand years old as it looked. It was just over eight, actually. At that point his father had left the room muttering something about ancestors and enchantments. Also, Ethan could have sworn he heard the words, "baboons with bloody sticks."
The boy smiled slightly and flipped the cover open.
Malfoy Code of Conduct
Written by Icarius Malfoy, b. A.D. 330
Last updated by Draco Malfoy, 2004
Table of Contents
Foreward
Section 1: of Birth and Death
i. Requirements of birth
ii. Acceptable circumstances of death
iii. Procreating
Section 2: of Food, Appearance, Behaviour, and Shelter
i. Acceptable food and drink
ii. Acceptable Appearance
iii. Acceptable Behavior
iv. Concerning the Malfoy's Word
v. Acceptable Living Standards
Section 3: Business Conduct
i. Regarding others
ii. Regarding self
iii. Important note that deserves a Roman numeral of its own
Section 4: Leisure Conduct
i. Foreward
ii. Regarding others
iii. Regarding self
Section 5: Relating
i. On platonic relationships
ii. On 'romance'
Section 6: of Enemies and Warring
i. Foreward
ii. Ostensible treatment of enemies
iii. Secretive treatment of enemies
iv. Siding during wars
Section 7: in Practising Magic
i. Requirements
ii. On Dark Magic
Closing Notes
Ethan raised an eyebrow, thinking to himself, "There is a section on procreating?"
"This is ridiculous," he muttered to himself, popping a truffle into his mouth from the tin of never-ending truffles and other fine confectionaries. It was one of the presents he had received from his parents, although his father wasn't aware of it.
He emitted a sigh and scanned the table of contents again.
"The foreward…and so it begins."
Malfoy Code of Conduct
– Foreward by Draco Malfoy–
It really is rather interesting, I think, that in the beginning, when I had been given the grudging task of rewriting the Malfoy Code of Conduct,I wasn't terribly excited about it. I wasn't in the slightest bit interested, to tell the truth. The truth of the matter is that I have better things to do than sit around rewrite a giant tome.
So, it's taken me about six years to actually get the motivation to do such a daunting project. How long it's taken me to do the actual writing is exactly five months and seven days. Rewriting rules, adding onto them, making others more accurate, and making completely different ones isn't as simple as you may think. Especially with the ridiculous amount of rules that there are.
Something to keep in mind about the Code is that it's terribly archaic. It's been updated every one hundred years, give or take, since Midas' time, but 1893 really is a very different time than 2004. So much had to be updated. The problem is that the rules cannot be taken off. Malfoys are free to add on and revise, but taking a rule and completely getting rid of it is out of the question. It's simply not possible due to the enchantments that are placed on each book.
A note on the enchantments- they're also very archaic and it took me two weeks to figure them all out...what's rather depressing is that I had complete instructions to them, as well. Eternity Charms are embedded into this book and all the past Code books. Once a new one is written, the old one loses its magic, and infuses the new book thus causing the latest one to look like it was thrown into a herd of stampeding elephants even though it hasn't left my desk once in the five months I've been writing it.
After getting well into Section 1 of this book, though, I was very amused. Here I was writing the book over again and able to add my own words, thought, and opinion into it. What other way to make my future generations more interested in reading this book than by being obnoxiously sarcastic on some of these with comments?
I have to mention also that most of the older comments have been erased by me because they were unreadable due to some of our ancestors' illegible handwriting and spelling. Also, let's all thank the Great Vowel Shift or else I would have been completely lost.
So I present you with the latest edition of the Malfoy Code of Conduct. Hopefully five months of attempting to be witty paid off and will make this more amusing for all of you. As far as I know, my main portrait is going to be in the Lake Wing of the Manor so be sure to visit me after I'm dead. It'll be appreciated. I cannot stand the thought of having no one to talk to but our ancestors. Sweet Merlin, Nyx Malfoy, for leading such an interesting life, has very boring tales she likes to tell. Stupid bint.
