Disclaimer: I don't own Yuffie, Vincent, or anything else from Final Fantasy VII. ^^

A/N: I realise that this is probably the most over-used status affliction of all. But hey, it had to be done! ^_^ Merry Christmas everyone. And quite possibly a Happy New Year, too, since I may not get another chapter up beforehand. I don't remember what the Lariat looks like. I miss FFVII.

Oh, and a note… Vinnie doesn't wear a Ribbon, everyone! I've just noticed that in the game, my Vincent is remarkably resilient even when I don't have any useful accessories or armour equipped. ^^ One reason I love him so much. One thing he does succumb to with startling regularity is Fury… which is good, because it means I get to use Chaos a lot! ^_^

It Lives!

"Well, look at you, Vinnie. You look like a glo-stick." Yuffie chuckled. Vincent gave her a weary look, his eyes narrowed slightly as he tried to shove back the pain of the poison in his veins. It was not yet serious, but he would prefer it prevented before it became such.

"I've always found glo-sticks rather fascinating." He responded dryly. "Yuffie, an Antidote, please…?"

"Fresh out, Vinnie." She gave him a helpless little shrug, and then her mouth stretched itself into a grin of frightening proportions. "But… we finally have a use for that stupid Heal materia!" She chirped in a bright and extremely irritating sing-song voice.

"…very good, Yuffie."

"I mean, seriously Vinnie – Cloud has actually given us a materia that we now find ourselves in need of. Isn't that, like, the most amazing thing?"

"…yes, Yuffie."

"I think he must've been totally sick or something, don't you? Or maybe he was confused? Because he never gives us anything helpful."

"Yuffie, I hate to point this out, but I am slowly dying and I have no more MP. Kindly cast Poisona so that we can move on."

Yuffie stopped in the midst of twirling in circles with said Heal materia and gave him a slightly embarrassed look. "Oh, right. Sorry, Vinnie. It's on your gun, right?" She crouched down next to the poisoned man. "Um… I guess you can't move much, huh?"

In response, Vincent gave her a baleful look. Yuffie cocked her head at him and calmly began unbuckling her shoulder armour. "This thing is way too bulky, y'know? I'll never get your gun out of your holster with that thing. I can't even lift it. You're really strong, y'know, holding it with just one arm all the time…"

Vincent's vision was fogging and he closed his eyes stubbornly. It was a choice between sinking into unconsciousness and risking death or listening to her prattling and risking insanity. Vincent heard soft thuds as Yuffie's armour hit the ground, and his eyes shot open in surprise as he felt her fingers on his belt. Yuffie seemed not to notice her companion's shock, her head low and eyes focussed on unclipping the holster from Vincent's belt. She was still babbling away, to herself more than him, and although she and the landscape around him had become nothing more than vaguely colourful blurs, he was aware that her hair smelled wonderful.

A loud oof! brought his mind swiftly away from that train of thought, and Yuffie dragged his beloved Lariat closer to her so that she could pick the appropriate materia out of its barrel. He saw her grey eyes through a fog as they smiled at him. "There we go. Poisona!"

A soothing coolness welled in Vincent with the spell, starting in his head and sweeping down into his legs, his fingertips.  He blinked. He could see much more clearly now. Yuffie stood up quickly, bouncing back to her feet and holding his gun carefully in both hands. He shook his head slightly to clear it of the slightly euphoric effect of the spell and took it back, resting it against his shoulder as he deftly reattached his holster.

Yuffie slung on her shoulder armour and cocked her head at him with a slightly loopy smile as she buckled it back on, yanking at the straps. She examined the Heal materia carefully. "It still has so far to go… we could walk all the way to the North Continent again before it'd be powerful enough to allow us an Esuna."

Vincent shrugged, held his hand out for it. "It was useful this time."

Yuffie's eyes remained on the materia as she reluctantly placed it in his hand. "Yeah. This time." She shook her head and poked out her tongue. "Y'know, you looked kinda good in green, Vinnie."

"……"

"Or maybe it was just the neon. Have you ever considered, like, neon purple?"

Vincent frowned. He knew he should have chosen unconsciousness.

~*~

A/N: =) Merry Christmas. Please review. The next chapter will be much more interesting, I promise. Fury! Sadness! And the scary, scary magic that are Hypers and Tranquilisers…