Chapter 18: Sweet n' Sour
The two cars approached Anne swiftly, about to crush her in the middle. Suddenly, a pink and black blur dropped near her.
"Ana, Move!" the figure yelled, tackling her off the road. "Stay down," she said as the cars passed over them, barely missing each other.
"Pilipa?" Anne guessed her identity, feeling that this person looked familiar. Her savior was a pink and black HUcaseal of similar height. Similar to Anne, the middle area of her torso, abdomen, and her knee-high boots were white. Her face, however, had fair synthetic skin, red lipstick, and grey realistic eyes. She also had pink hair, mixed of synthetic and metal, that covered half of her face and a three-pronged pink and black bow.
"Stay down!" she replied, taking out her blue boomerang-like Spinner. "Fire!" she yelled loudly as she threw the Spinner at one of the turning cars. Suddenly a flurry of photon bullets began to fly at both cars, causing both of them to crash into the ground and grind to a halt.
"What's going on?" Anne asked, bewildered.
The pink HUcaseal glanced around for a second before getting up and announcing, "It's cool guys!"
"Friggin' Newks!" said a large, black, flattop-headed RAcast with glowing yellow eyes as he walked out of an alley, carrying a Sniper rifle.
"It's always somethin' with them," said another RAcast, following the previous one of the alley. This one was purple, slightly shorter, but wider, had a shogun-like head, and also carried a Sniper.
"Wait'll I get my hands on those shits!" shouted a redheaded, tanned HUnewearl hopping out of a second story window near the group. She was wearing a black jacket, a short yellow miniskirt, and thigh-high boots.
"Watch out!" Anne shouted. "There's another one!"
"Don't worry about her," said a dark-skinned RAmar wearing light blue armor and a headband to keep his violet dreadlocks out of his face. "She's on our side." Sure enough, she walked over to one of the wrecks, punched a whole into an undamaged window and yanked out the driver.
"Maraico?!" she yelled angrily at the grimacing Newman she held by the collar. "You asswhipes are still pullin' this shit?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
"No hablo ingles," he replied, smiling arrogantly.
"The fuck you don't!" she shouted, slamming him against the vehicle.
"You okay, Ana?" the other HUcaseal asked, ignoring the constant stream of swears.
"Thanks," Anne said, rising to her feet. "What are you doing out her, Pi…?"
"It's just P," the pink one said. "If you have to say my name, call me Pikalika. I'm with the ABC team now. That girl with the dirty mouth is Q," she nodded toward the HUnewearl who was now battering each Newk unconscious. "Um, she has coprolalia."
"What?" Anne asked.
"It's a Tourette's Syndrome thing," P said. "She can't help it."
"I'm K," the RAmar said, shaking Anne's hand. "And those two are Capital G and Heavy D," he said, motioning toward the black RAcast and the purple RAcast.
"Ma'am," the black G nodded, as did the purple D.
"So, do all of you have names that start with those letters?" Anne asked. They nodded in response. "And since when did you have skin, Pili…?
"Cool it with the name!" P shushed. Then, she smiled, "So ya' like my new look, huh?"
"Ladies," K interrupted, "this isn' a good time or place to talk about that. There're still plenty of Newks around here. We need to get that candy and get out."
"Hey, Q!" G yelled to the HUnewearl. "Bring one of those guys over here!"
"And make sure he's still conscious!" P added. Then she commented to the others, "I swear, if it weren't for us, that girl would kill somebody."
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"Whew!" Mina panted as she appeared in the Caves 1. "It's hotter than the desert in here!" She stepped through the opening metal door and saw why. She saw the lava flows on both sides of the cave that T-65 had told her about. She also heard the sharks that appeared. Knowing that she only had a couple of hours before sunset, she raced into battle with her trusty Mind Autogun. She tossed a ball of fire at each. Two shots of the Autogun later, both sharks were on the ground. She stepped away from the door, seeing another door on the other side of the cavern.
"This place is huge!" she thought, noting how high the ceiling was. It was probably over 50 feet high. She noted that the cave was artificial, since there were doors and a few stairs to even out the ground. What especially caught her attention were the various puddles of blue-green liquid on the ground. As soon as she left the final step, she heard the distinct sound of teleporting behind her. She was startled by 7-foot, white lilies that seemed to stare back at her. She slowly backed away, not comfortable with the way they tracked her movement. Then, they arched back and spat green goop at her, which she was able to sidestep. Suspecting that what they weren't trying to be friendly, she simply walked toward her previous destination. As she approached the next door, another pair of giant flowers appeared, this time blocking the door. She was starting to suspect that these creatures had the same mentality as the forest animals.
"I don't have time for this," she frowned. She dashed forward, determined to bypass the flowers. The plants, startled by her action, stood straight up and closed their buds. The sudden shrieking noise they emitted shocked her, but it was the sudden loss of feeling in her body that caused her to trip and fall between the flowers' stems, dangerously close to the edge of the floor next to the boiling lava. When she tried crawling up to the door, she realized that it was locked. The evil plants then began to snap at her with their beak-like blooms. Too numb to feel anything, she tried to blast them with a Technique. Nothing happened, except the plants began to snap at her outstretched hand. When she stretched out her other hand to shoot the plants with her weapon, they knocked it out of her hand and into the lava.
"Shimatta!" she yelled in frustration, scooting closer to the door and out of their range. The plants finally stopped snapping at her. Instead, one reared back and spat the green ooze at her, while the other snickered as it splattered on her helpless form. She immediately felt the effects, as she curled into a ball grasping her pained stomach.
"It…feels like I'm having an ulcer!" she thought painfully. "Must be some kind of absorbent poison… I refuse to go out like this!" she thought, as a purple darkness began to surround her, shadowing the glowing lava on both edges next to her. She thrust her arm outward, as her hand was engulfed in darkness. She fired a cloudy, dark ball of energy at the lily that tried to snap at her. Its entire form was disintegrated in purple flames as the plant shrieked in pain. Mina then took another painful breath, charging a second Technique and disintegrating the other plant a few seconds later. Her dark aura faded as she calmed down and used another Technique to heal herself with blue and green sparkles, not of minor wounds, but of the poisoning. The pain instantly subsided as she leaned against the door, sighing of relief.
"Gotta' get this over with," she said, remembering her time limit. She took out her special tool, made just for opening locked doors.
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"Get ready guys!" Gun Snipe announced as the Dragon dove underground. "Stay close to the walls and watch the radar!" The Dragon burrowed toward her. She hopped right onto its form, seemingly surfing along the ground. "Yeehaw!"
"What the hell, man?!" Xero exclaimed. "Is she crazy or somethin'?"
"Just wait for it!" Seth yelled at him. The Dragon abruptly blasted out of the ground, as Gun Snipe rolled down its back and fell clumsily to the ground. "Now!" Galactica, T-65, and Xero moved in to attack, while Gun Snipe and Seth stood back.
"Bust a cap in his scaly ass!" Gun Snipe yelled to the Rangers. "Right in the head!"
"Swing at its feet to off-balance it!" Seth called to Xero. The Dragon landed with a thunderous crash, causing a shockwave to knock down all but Galactica, who had a solid stance. Even Seth and Gun Snipe had been shaken out of their unguarded stances.
"Dammit!" Xero cursed, with his face flat on the ground.
"I always forget about that," the RAcast thought out loud as he stumbled to his feet.
"Looks like its time for me to step in," the RAmarl said, kneeling with a smile.
"Hold it, Gun Snipe," Seth smirked. "Let's give them a chance to redeem themselves."
"You're no fun," Gun Snipe pouted, sitting back down.
Then the Dragon snarled angrily as Galactica shot it in the eye. Unlike any time before, it suddenly gave its full attention to her and stomped ominously towards her.
"That's different," Galactica commented stepping back. The next shot she took was the last straw for the legendary lizard. It spat a fireball and sprinted toward her, completely ignoring T-65 and Xero. "Help!" she yelled running the other way.
"At least she pissed it off," Gun Snipe shrugged, getting to her feet.
"This is a fiasco," Seth sighed. "Go for it." He then broke into a run towards Galactica.
"Here we go!" Gun Snipe said joyfully. She tried to equip her rifle from her ISL, only to remember that it had been destroyed. So instead, she jogged over to T-65, who along with Xero had been watching the saurian monster gain on the RAcaseal. "Hey, you! Gimme your Rifle!"
"Why?" he asked, handing it to her.
"I'm going to take that thing down in one shot," she replied, removing the green energy vial on the gun and replacing it with a pink vial. "It's just like taking out Wyrm Drakes back home on Motav, 'cept this bastard doesn't have armor." She took careful aim using the scope.
Meanwhile, the Dragon was snapping at Galactica as it got closer to the surprisingly swift Android. Seth had made his way over and tackled Galactica to the side. The Dragon stumbled to a clumsy stop to turn itself toward the two. It made another growl before a pink photon bullet entered the side of its head and exited on the other side. The beast paused in shock before keeling over.
"Are you hurt?" Seth asked the shocked RAcaseal.
"It didn't do anything like that before," she said, staring at its fading body
"And that's…how you take down….a Dragon," Gun Snipe breathed heavily, walking forward with the other two hunters. "You guys aren't too bad…Just be a little more careful…and work on your aim."
"You okay?" T-65 asked the seemingly exhausted RAmarl.
"I'm fine," she said, smiling euphorically. "I'm perfectly fine."
"So we can go home?" Xero said. "Because it's getting kinda late."
"That might explain the Dragon's unusual behavior today," Seth said.
"You mean the rumor's true?" T-65 asked.
"Apparently animals get more dangerous when the sun begins to set," Seth clarified.
"Let's not stick around to find out," Gun Snipe said, opening a green telepipe.
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By that time, Mina had found out that there was some truth to the rumor. The monsters in the Caves had begun to fight more aggressively. She was no longer in the oppressively hot area full of lava flows. She had made her way through the large, lava area and made it to a section that was much more pleasant. It was cooler, full of damp rock, and pools of water. What amazed her the most, besides monsters and architecture that Pioneer 1 personnel had obviously installed, was that there were actually trees and ponds in various chambers that had light creeping through the ceiling. The ponds were alive with small fish, while the corridors had ghostly jellyfish that floated in the air and disappeared into the wall at any sign of a threat.
"Shimatta!" Mina cursed, as she destroyed an entire corridor's worth of floating trap mines with a chain of electricity. Someone had placed these throughout the Caves. She didn't know why and she didn't care at the moment. She was running out of time. With less than an hour before evening officially started, she had been running through the Caves, having to avoid staring at the marvels she found. The next room she entered was one of the less impressive parts of Caves 2. It was a dimly lit room with a single hole in the center of the ceiling to let in light and a constant drip of water. She had learned to be cautious of the ankle-deep water she had to wade through. Previously, she had encountered a slime creature that could slide through the water unnoticeably and suddenly strike with a razor tendril.
"Stop right where you are!" someone said from the other side of the room.
"Who's there?" Mina asked, holding her Staff close.
"What are you doing here?" the person asked. "Shouldn't you be leaving? It's almost sunset."
"I have a mission to finish," Mina answered. "I don't want to fight anyone. Have you seen three sisters around?" An electronic noise sounded from the other person and a hologram of a smiley with a thumbs-up appeared, illuminating the darkness around the person.
"Blasted Symbol Chat!" the obvious FOmarl cursed, turning her back on Mina, so as not to reveal her identity. From the brief glimpse of her that Mina got, the FOmarl was in a red and black dress, holding a scythe. "You may proceed." She suddenly summoned a portal and left.
"Strange," Mina said, moving on to the next door.
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Anne, along with several members of Team ABC, had arrived at an area where a dealer sometimes appeared. It would still be difficult to tell exactly who was the dealer. Most of the hunters hid in the alley, while Q stood out on the corner.
"Are we sure this is the right place?" Anne asked. "All I've seen are a bunch of thieves, whores, and other scum."
"Q knows what she's doing," K said confidently.
"Yeah, she knows a lot of people around here," P agreed. "Probably beat up half of 'em." They became silent as a scantily clad female Human approached Q.
"Hey there," she said in a sulky voice. "You wanna' come have some fun with me?"
"Fuck off," the Newman said, not moving from her spot. "I'm straight."
"Are you sure?" she asked teasingly. "It'll only cost a few Meseta."
"I only deal with guys, bitch," Q said with relative calm. "And the only whores I mess around with are the guys at Regalia. Y'know… where they have a license to do that shit. Now get the fuck outta' here."
"Aw come on!" the woman complained. "Those overpriced sluts wave around their fancy licenses and come into our territory…" Q lost her patience and slapped the woman, knocking her down.
"What'd I just say, bitch!?" Q yelled angrily.
"Q!" K yelled to her. "Calm."
"Calm," she repeated breathing in. "Shit."
"Stop," K said soothingly.
"Stop," she exhaled. "Fucking little…" The woman got the message and quickly left.
"It's really not her fault," K explained to Anne. "Q's disorder makes her say things she doesn't really mean."
"She sure does follow up on what she says," Anne muttered.
"What can I say, bot-girl?" Q said, hearing the comment. "Tourette's is some strong shit. I just gotta' curse. Kinda like when you have to sneeze."
"Ahem," Anne sounded.
"I know," Q said, turning to Anne. "You bitches don't sneeze. Well, the shit's hard to resist."
"Q?" asked another lady, this one a Newman in a black shirt and brown shorts. "What are you doing out here?"
"I've been waiting for your ass!" she yelled.
"Calm," K repeated.
"What do you want?" the other Newman asked, as Q inhaled.
"We need some candy," Q said. "We'll take anything ya got."
"Sorry, I'm all out," the dealer said.
"What the fuck?!" Q yelled. "Ya gotta' be shittin' me, Sue."
"It's been sold out since yesterday," Sue said, moving her red-pink hair out of her face.
"Fuck!" Q yelled, pulling her own hair.
"Come back in a few days," Sue said, leaving.
"So, where to now?" asked, walking out of the alley.
"Fuck if I know," Q replied. "If she doesn't have the shit, no fucker does."
"There's plenty of dealers around this area," P said optimistically.
"I'm sure someone will be willing to sell something to us," K added. "We just have to keep going."
"Fuck that!" Q shouted, turning around. "I'm outta' here!"
"Hold on!" G called out. "We're not finished!"
"No-no-no!" Q said quickly, turning back. "You, here. Me, there. Fuck you fuckers! I'm goin' home!"
"Do you four have any connections?" K asked the Androids, now that their Newman source had just left.
"I already sent a friend to Sector 13," Anne said, finally speaking up. "If the 'Droids have anything, they'll probably let him have it. I think it's about time I get in touch with him." Suddenly, a cab flew onto the scene and pulled up next to Anne. The back door opened and Miguel popped out.
"Finally found ya!" Miguel said, stepping out. "I managed to get something out of them. Get in."
"See ya, sis!" Anne said, hopping into the cab.
"Didn't we put C in Sector 13?" P asked, as the cab lifted off.
"She opted out of this one," K replied. "I don't think she wanted to use her influence like that."
"Great," P said dryly.
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Mina had found her way into a third section of the arduously lengthy Caves. This one was much more developed than the previous two. Many of the walls were painted or metal-plated; there were imposing columns in corners; there were also vents to let in fresh air and signs that gave directions. Unfortunately, the monsters were here in force. She was currently evading two large, yellowish shark creatures in a large chamber. She then got an idea for dispatching them easier. She led the somewhat slow mutants to a small dragon that was minding its own business in a corner. When it noticed her getting to close, it turned directly toward her, opened its mouth and shot a blue beam that tore through the air. Mina sidestepped out of the way, leaving the beam to slam into sharks behind her. The dragon then flapped its wings and flew across the room, to a more comfortable distance.
"Stupid sharks!" Mina thought, as she continued on her way. "I've been down her for half an hour and not a sign of anyone." As she headed through a misty hallway after passing another door, she saw a sign on the ceiling that read "Restricted Area. High-Voltage Ahead." What really caught her attention was the sweet smell of baking coming from the next room. She made her way through another door and saw another amazing sight. There was a very large device in a wide room filled with supply boxes, giving off electrical discharge along the ceiling. Some of the cables that were connected to the ceiling had broken and were hanging. In the corner of the room were several blonde identical women in blue miniskirts and an RV, colored in pink and red, and labeled "Three Sister's Shortcake Wagon." Mina couldn't believe her eyes.
"Are you the bakers I'm looking for?" Mina asked, timidly walking to one of the women standing beside the van.
"To tell the truth," she began, "we aren't just bakers. We're the Cake Sisters! You'll never taste a cake better than ours!"
"Okay," the FOmarl replied, not knowing what to say.
"What do you think of the humidity?" the woman asked, enthusiastically smiling. "It's perfect! Pioneer 2 didn't let us make cakes, so we came down here! Hey, wanna' try one?"
"Wait," Mina said, snapping out of her trance. "How did you all get past the guards at the main transporter? And what about the monsters around here?"
"Guards? Monsters? Our will to bake cakes can't be stopped by petty things like that," the Cake Sister announced triumphantly.
"Are you surprised," asked another sister by the van, "to find a cake shop in a place like this?"
"Yes!" Mina said, clasping her forehead. "It…it boggles the mind! You're not even hunters and you managed to get through here without a care in the world!"
"Uh huh," the nearest sister said, not seeing her point.
"It must be the RV," Mina thought, walking to the counter on the side of the vehicle.
"Welcome to Naura Cake Shop," the sister at the counter said from atop the RV. "Which would you like to purchase?" She was pointing at a menu on Mina's level. The choices were Strawberry, Peach, and Blueberry.
"Strawberry, I guess," Mina shrugged. "Is it photon storage-able?"
"Mmm hmm," the counter woman replied, smiling just like the others. "You don't have to pay for this. We're happy to just make them and see the happy look on people's faces."
"Can I have another one?" Mina asked, realizing that she hadn't had anything like that since Pioneer 2 left Coral.
"Sorry, I can't give you more than one," the woman said, handing her a box of the cake, which was transferred into Mina's ISL. "We weren't really expecting anyone to buy anything down here. We were going to give these out on the ship in secret."
"I see," Mina said understandingly, making a Telepipe. "You all shouldn't stay here too long."
"We were just about to leave," one of the triplets said. "We hope to see you again!"
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"This was too much work for 1500 Meseta," Anne said, stepping out the cab with Miguel at the Hunter's Deck. "So what did you get?"
"Sweet Strawberry Wine," Miguel replied.
"I don't think that counts as candy," Anne said cynically, turning towards the HUcast.
"The 'Droids added a whole lotta' sugar to this," Miguel explained, "so it'll do." As they walked towards the Hunter's Guild, a flash appeared next to them, and in its place was Mina.
"Hi," Mina greeted, about to walk away.
"What've you been doing on Ragol this late?" Anne asked. She noticed that Mina's dress was dirty and damp. Her hair was frizzled and messy, even though it was still in a clip.
"It was a long quest," Mina said, stopping. "I don't think it was worth the 1500 Meseta reward."
"What'd ya have to do?" Miguel asked, getting suspicious.
"Find some stupid sweets," Mina said tiredly. Anne and Miguel glanced at each other, and immediately understood. They couldn't let Mina beat them to the client.
"You look kind of roughed up," Miguel said, putting his hand on her shoulder. "What happened?"
"I'll finish our quest, Miguel," Anne said casually. Miguel materialized a box containing the bottle of wine from his ISL and gave it to her. She then began to walk away.
"What did you two retrieve?" Mina asked Anne.
"Just stuff," Anne said, still walking. "Stuff that a person couldn't usually get. Now, I've got to finish this before someone else does."
"That reminds me!" Mina remembered. "I have to hurry with this. Miguel, I'll tell you what happened in a minute." She tried to hurry away, but Miguel held onto her shoulder.
"What's the rush?" he asked innocently.
"Let me go," Mina said, trying to shake his grip.
"Move it, Anne!" he yelled, grabbing Mina with both arms. The HUcaseal began to run. Mina got the hint and easily broke free of his grasp. Then, he tried to grab her again; surprised that she broke his grip so easily.
"Seoye-nage!" Mina shouted, grabbing his wrist and chest plate, pulling him forward to off balance him, pivoting in the opposite direction, and tossing him over her back by his arm, all in one swift motion. Then, lifting her dress, she gave chase to Anne who had a good head start.
"I've got the stuff, Trekka!" Anne said, bursting into the Hunter's Guild. She immediately stopped, shocked at what she saw.
"You're not going to beat me to this one!" Mina said, running up next to her and immediately stopping in response to what was happening. Trekka, the client, was enjoying a lollipop out of a box of sweets given to her by the FOnewearl in white in front of her.
"Mmm," Trekka sounded. "Th…Thanks, Daniela! You can get your Meseta!"
"All right," Daniela said, heading for the counter. "Thank you, Misha!" she thought.
"Whoa!" Anne shouted. "We brought stuff, too! Don't we get anything?"
"I'll gain weight if I eat too many sweets," Trekka said absentmindedly "Sweet food is really addictive."
"What's up?" Miguel asked, appearing in the doorway.
"Someone else beat us both to it!" Anne said angrily, stomping out of the room.
"All right!" Miguel cheered. "More alcohol for us! I got 5 of those bottles."
"Why is everything so easy for you?" Anne said. The disillusioned FOmarl went to the FOnewearl, Daniela, to talk.
"Where'd you get your stuff from?" she asked.
"My little sister, Misha," the Newman replied. "I don't know where she gets it from." Anne and Miguel glanced at each other and left.
"….Cake?" Mina offered meekly.
Notes: And so, we leave this weak ending. What have we learned? Stronger monsters come out when dusk approaches. Sweets are illegal on the ship. Newks are jerks. And Androids really like alcohol.
Next time on PSO: Sidestory: T-65 takes another quest, thinking he's ready to seriously take on the caves. It's a stroke of good and bad luck on his part. His client(s) don't seem to be especially trustworthy. It's almost Native Research all-over again. Speaking of which, Mina picks up on some information from other scientific experts. Suspense, intrigue, and just a hint of conspiracy are all included in "A Little Secret." Can you keep a secret…Only Toonami!
