"Agent Next, there's a problem in classics today."
I looked up from the paperwork I had been working on, glad of something that would take me away from my desk just for a little bit. "What's happening?"
"Trouble in the Aeneid. It seems Dido got really fed up with Aeneas and instead of ignoring him in the Underworld, she kicked him in the crotch."
"Ouch."
"Twice."
I tried not to chuckle. Aeneas was a bit of an arrogant bastard, I couldn't deny that he had it coming. "How many readers were there?"
"Three hundred, a few college classes, and some pleasure readers. One radical feminist group is trying to seize on it, so we need to get it cleaned up right away."
"Right. Send in an A-3 to replace Dido for a few readings and make sure that Aeneas hasn't been damaged, he's got to have children a few books later."
"Yes, ma'am." The Agent scurried off.
Five book world emergencies this morning and it wasn't even time for lunch yet!
