Konnichiwa minna-san. I am Kei Hao Asakura. I am an author! I

have made three or so Naruto stories. One got taken off. I was sad.

Then I have two other ones that I have not updated forever. Which is

bad. At the moment, I am working on three stories. Two anime and

one video game. (Naruto, Bleach and Kingdom Hearts) This isn't

about me though. It is about Naruto. NOT EVEN NARUTO! The star

for this fan fic… OROCHIMARU! And the sidekicks and/or comic

relief, Kabuto, Sakon, Zaku and Kimimaro! I only wanted them cause

I really don't care about the other otonins. Most of all, KIN! I HATE

her voice so much. If that bothers you, then I won't bash her at all.

Promise. Poor Chouji, Neji and Shikamaru. Spoilers are most likely to

happen in this fic. If you are new to Naruto, not have read over

chapter 180 or so, haven't seen episodes like… 118 or somewhere

around there, then you may not want to read this. I got the idea when

I was talking to one of my friends about Ayashi no Ceres then Q-san,

then her voice actor who is also Orochimaru! She said that she loved

his eye shadow and I said that I loved him and the idea popped into

my head. A story about how he got all his cool clothes. YAY! That and

I watched a silly little parody of final fantasy 7. This isn't a parody. My

friend, Rena Tsukino told me of an anime called umm… something. I

can't remember well… I think it was… um… Magical Shopping Arcade

or something like that. I better start the story. Sakon-chan, you do the

disclaimer.

DISCLAIMER:

Sakon: Kei Hao Asakura does not and never will own Naruto, any big

labels that you know that she doesn't have her name on it and of

course, Orochimaru-sama's eye shadow.

Kei: Yes, I know. It is sad.

WARNING! Gag yaoi. Meaning that men are liking each other, but

only for the sake of the humor of the story. I am a yaoi fan, but I know

there are some people who hate it. I am fine with that and that is why

I am making it only gag. Cause if it was for real, then not many people

would read it, would they? Sadness. Ha. Anyway, it would be called

shounen ai since nothing is graphic or naughty. Hehe. Umm.. I better

start!

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"Orochimaru-sama, you seem… distant. Is something troubling you,

sir?" someone asked the snake like man.

The pale long haired brunette looked away from the fly on the wall

and saw his number one subordinate, Kabuto. Orochimaru sighed,

shaking his head. Something was missing. Missing in his heart. He

looked down at his clothes and hissed in disgust. He looked so…

NORMAL! His jounin vest, long sleeved black shirt, black pants and

his sound headband. He could only sigh and looked up at Kabuto.

"Kabuto, I feel like I am missing something. Tell me, do you know

what can make me… different?" he asked, clasping his hands in front

of his heart.

A pink background went behind Kabuto, pink bubbles, rainbows and

sparkly eyes surrounded both Orochimaru and Kabuto.

"O-Orochimaru-sama… I think… I think… YOU SHOULD GET A

MAKE OVER!"

All the shoujouness disappeared and little anime dots appeared over

his head. A little cicada made a noise and Orochimaru slowly looked

up at Kabuto.

"Kabuto… THAT IS THE BEST IDEA EVA! Go get Zaku, Kimimaro,

Sakon and Ukon! Hurry! We have many things to do and so little

time!" Orochimaru said with glee, jumping from his throne like chair.

Kabuto stared at him for a moment then looked down at his clothes.

He too looked 'normal'. Normal shirt, normal pants, normal shoes.

He wanted to stand out just a bit. Just a little. So with a sigh, he

walked out the door to leave Orochimaru to plot. Yes, plot. Like a

good little antagonist! Ku ku ku ku.

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Zaku was in his room, sneaking up to Kin who say on his bed, clad

only in her underwear!

"Heh heh heh. Sensei Zaku thinks that student Kin-chan has been

bad and needs to be punished," he said, walking towards her, an evil

grin on her face. (can you believe they are 14?) She pretended to be

scared as he jumped on the bed, pouncing on her! He was about to do

the … thing… when there was a knock on the door!

"Crap! Hide!" he whispered, picking her up and throwing her into the

bathroom connected to his room.

It was Kabuto, asking to come in. Zaku looked around, found a shirt

and slipped it on. Trouble was, it was Kin's! He opened the door and

saw Kabuto staring at him.

"Y-Yeah. What is it you need?" he asked in his annoyed tone voice.

Kabuto smiled, trying not to look down at his shirt.

"Orochimaru-sama wants to see you in the meeting room as soon as

possible. That is all. And um… you may not want to wear that.

Orochimaru-sama may think you are… something you shouldn't be.

Ahem… well… see ya," Kabuto said, walking away, trying so hard to

hold his laughter in.

Zaku glared at his back, slammed the door and heard a light moan.

"Man, Zaku, that hurt. I hit my head on the toilet!" Kin said as she

walked out.

But she didn't say anything else as she saw what Zaku was wearing.

Glaring at him, she stomped over to him, snatched the shirt right off

his back, put it on and stormed out of his room.

"D-Damn you Kabuto. I WAS GONNA GET SOME!" he yelled, kicking

the wall as hard as he could.

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Kabuto was almost traumatized after seeing Zaku in a girls shirt.

What next? Oh yeah. He knew. He knew exactly what was next.

Kimimaro. If seeing Zaku in woman's clothing was bad, Kimimaro

was the end of the world. Secretly, he always watched him. Kimimaro

I mean. Always when he was training with Orochimaru. Ever since he

was young. They would fight over who loved him more. Not in front of

Orochimaru of course. But they kept on fighting for his attention. If

he could win one million dollars to tell his one and true rival, Kabuto

would blurt out in a heart beat 'KIMIMARO!' But since he won't get

money for this, we will just say that he blurted out Kimimaro out

loud. That made him seem like a psycho. It's alright Kabuto, we

already know you are a psycho! And so, he trudged to the dreaded

Kaguya clan's Kimimaro, hoping that he didn't have to talk to him

much. The door seemed to loom over him. It was the end of the world.

He had to talk to this… boner guy! Taking in a deep breath, he

knocked on the door.

"Kimimaro-kun, may I talk to you?"

"Coming."

Kabuto sighed then waited for a moment as he heard footsteps

coming to the door.

Kimimaro opened the door and when he saw Kabuto, he glared and

asked what he wanted.

Kabuto put on a fake smile and said, "Orochimaru-sama wants to see

you."

The frown faded from his face and was replaced by a smile. The

shoujouness came back and Kimimaro's eyes turned also Shoujou.

"O-Orochimaru-sama wants to see me? ME? Oh what for, Kabuto-

san? What for?" Kimimaro asked, taking Kabuto's hand into his.

Kabuto winced, but still had his fake smile and answered, "He wants

to take a couple of us shopping."

Kimimaro's face turned into the biggest smile ever and suddenly, he

turned chibi!

"Oh joy! Orochimaru-sama wants to see me! I shall go! Please excuse

me!" he said, his voice high pitched.

Kabuto watched as the chibi Kimi-chan ran down the hall, flowers,

hearts and rainbows following him along with the pink background.

"My gawd, what I have to deal with just to take over the world,"

Kabuto sighed, walking down the hallway to Sakon and Ukon's room.

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Well, that is all. I hope it's alright. Review if you like it. If you hate it…

please… be gentle. I am a frail girl who can't stand to be hurt. Umm…

if I get at least one review then I shall make another chapter. That is

all. Please review. Maybe Kabuto will be happier. I know Kimi-chan

can't be anymore happier. Haha.


Kei Hao Asakura