Me in Paper Mario instead of Mario, Chapter one, Prologue
As I boarded the ship, I had no idea what awaited me. My arrival in Rogueport was less than comfy. When I got there, I noticed a man in a bizarre costume attacking a small female goomba. No fight had begun, but I gathered that he wanted info on a "crystal star". The goomba didn't know anything, and didn't appear to want to give them the info. "Whoa, stop!" I yelled, "What's this about?"
"She has information on the crystal stars, and we want it!" said the man in the outfit.
"Why?" I asked.
"Grodus wants them, and what Grodus wants, Grodus gets."
"Are you Grodus?"
"No, I'm Lord Crump."
"Well, I must ask you to cease and desist."
"You ordering me around, that's rich, Buhuhuhuhuh" and he dove.
I should explain something, first, no RPG battle system, and second, I watch a lot of wrestling, hence my battle style.
He went for his standard jumpy thingy, and I quickly caught him and shifted his momentum into a T-bone suplex. He quickly got up and started to lunge again. I ducked. He fell. I quickly slapped him in a Boston Crab. It pained me to put his feet so close to my face (according to the Jabbies after Chap. 2, his feet stink). "I give, uncle, I give!" he screamed. I let go. "Well, you beat me, but now it's GO TIME!" he yelled, sending millions of his little cronies after me. I crawled out with the Goomba, and we fled the scene.
"Thanks for that," the goomba said, "I've just got to give you a little reward (exact line?)," and with that she kissed me. It was a short peck.
"Thanks," I replied, "but I'm not sure it would work out."
"Yeah, I know," she replied, "by the way, I'm Goombella." I'll skip ahead here, because it's al the same as the game until here. Enter battle with Goombas. Goombella took the regular Goombe, while I took the spiked one. I drove his head spike into the ground, beating him without pain at all, my specialty. The paragoomba was on the ground one tombstone Piledriver later.
"Let's get out of here," the regular goomba, freshly headbonked into a world of pain by my new partner in crime, screamed. So they did.
"Let's keep going," said Frankly, so we walked to the door. "Hold your map up here," he continued.
As I held up the map, the ground around me started glowing. Suddenly, on my map, a star appeared over by a picture of a castle. "Oh," said the professor, "You want to go to Hooktail Castle."
I was on my way. I saw what looked like a tentacle in the water, so I yelled, "Anyone there?"
"Bloop blib blop blap." Was my reply. Fortunately, Goombella told me that it meant that the Blooper didn't speak English.
"We need to get by," I said, as Goombella translated. The ground shook and the blooper moved. I hopper across the water and jumped down the pipe. END OF CHAPTER
