Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or anything that resembles it.


Saiyans and the internet don't mix

Part 2 – Raditz' Revenge


Golden rays shimmered through the lavender clouds of the early morning, highlighting the hemi-spherical shape of the main Capsule Corporation building. It was a peaceful morning, blue birds chirping as they bathed in one of the Brief's luxury bird baths.

A lone figure made its way across the garden toward the main house, rubbing its eyes tiredly. If one looked close enough, they could just make out the mane of spiky hair that almost trailed behind the figure. He reached the side door to the main house, and was just about to turn the handle when the doors flung themselves open.

"RADDITZU! YOU'RE LATE!" A heavy male voice boomed only centimetres from the first figure. The mini-hurricane and sonic boom produced from the smaller man caused the mane of hair to puff up and stick out, rather like a hedgehog. The larger saiyan, known as Raditz, scratched his head in dismay. There was only one explanation that he agreed to move into Capsule Corporation, ok maybe there were two…

The first reason being; that he could escape his brother's insane methods of training…and reason two being he wanted to find out all the tricks that the Prince now used in battle. It would help him in the future Budokai tournaments. There was a third reason, but it didn't count on his part. Vegeta had practically dragged the eldest saiyan back to Capsule Corporation after realising that he'd basically 'defeated Kakarotto' very easily.

The maned saiyan shook his head as the lecture continued. It wasn't something that he was unused to, having to deal with the temperamental prince for most of the younger saiyan's adolescent years.

"I've missed a whole hour's training waiting on your lazy backside! You're not fit to be in the presence of royalty, now get moving!" The short saiyan prince bounced behind the elder saiyan, shoving him at super-saiyan speed toward the Gravity Room. One inside, he pounced upon the controls, setting it immediately to five hundred times earth's natural gravity.

Raditz immediately found his body weighing well over five tons. A lot of the weight was concentrated in the dorsal direction of his body. Very few people realise exactly how much hair can weigh until they were subject to heavy gravity. The large saiyan burst into super-saiyan mode to help ease the tremendous weight he was bearing.

A whistle cut through the dense gravity, causing the elder saiyan to jump. Poor Raditz barely had time to dodge the punch aimed at the side of his head.

'It's definitely going to be one of those days' the larger saiyan thought, just in time to get slammed into the wall of the gravity room.


A little while later, a rather bruised and bloody first class saiyan was scarfing down a late breakfast, while keeping one eye wary of his prince. Vegeta had basically mopped the floor with the poor warrior and it was obvious that the saiyan prince still had a lot of pent up energy.

"Why don't you just call Kakarotto out for a spar?" Raditz suggested after getting glared at for the one hundredth time that morning.

"For once you have a useful idea." Vegeta scoffed before reaching for the phone. Bulma wandered into the kitchen, fully suited up for a day full of board meetings. She frowned at the sight of the prince mouthing off at Goku at such an early hour. The commotion he made over Raditz waking up too late had woken her up. The blue haired scientist was not pleased, not pleased at all.

Vegeta hung up on the younger sleepy saiyan, just in time to catch a briefcase to the head.

"Onna!" The prince squealed, holding his cranium delicately where it throbbed with pain. Humans, as he discovered, didn't need to be powerful to cause trouble, or minor pain. Bulma, at first, was a bit cautious of the large saiyan staying within the Capsule Corporation grounds. However, it seemed that this situation only seemed to inflate Vegeta's ego to no end.

"Vegeta, be nice, otherwise I'll deactivate the Gravity room AND you can sleep on the couch for the next month. I swear." She threw her arms up in exasperation "I'll be back this evening."

"But…" The door slammed shut, leaving a saiyan prince doing his best goldfish impression. Raditz snickered quietly at the situation, only to cop a death glare from Vegeta. The larger saiyan gulped, excusing himself from the table.

The prince of the Saiyans took a moment to admire his handiwork. Yes, he was in charge once again, seen as he finally had at least one subject that respected his superior. The short saiyan threw back his head, laughing in a semi-insane fashion. He raked his fingers through the flame of hair before blasting off over the horizon to beat up on the saiyan known as Kakarotto.


Raditz sat at his desk later staring at the screen with an almost impish look on his face. It was less than two months ago when Goku had scared him into becoming a super saiyan. A large grin graced his features as he stared at the prize information, or rather websites that he had found. Ah, yes he'd get his revenge… and in a way which meant that he couldn't get beaten up in the process.

During his boredom, he'd been searching the internet. Of course out of experimentation, he'd started to put people's names into the search. After doing a little more digging, something interesting had appeared. There were several sites with "yaoi" content. He'd soon learnt that this meant relationships between two males. Somehow, the popular content of many sites was Vegeta/Goku (Kakarotto). The large saiyan rubbed his hands in glee, knowing that this relationship was NOT true… but he could torture both of them for giving him several heart attacks since he had been wished back to life.

"Heh… Let's see you talk your way out of this one… if either of you actually stay conscious…"

Raditz took to the air snickering like a ten year old on Halloween.


Goku and Vegeta were sprawled out over the grass near the Son residence. Both were battered and bruised, however extremely satisfied. They'd been sparring for a good five hours straight giving both saiyans the exercise they needed for all the excess energy reserves they had.

A large shadow loomed over the pair as a familiar walking hairball peeked down at the two younger saiyans.

"I take it you enjoyed your little 'spar'?" Raditz asked, with a small grin smothered on his face.

"What's it to you?" Vegeta hissed, bouncing to his feet. The large saiyan turned his back to the prince with a nonchalant shrug.

"I just found out some rather tasty information about you two."

"WHAT!" Goku and Vegeta shrieked, glanced at each other for a moment then back to the taller saiyan, only to find that Raditz had vacated the area. Goku whipped his head around, looking at the house suspiciously. After a few moments, the brain damaged saiyan struck a pose, pointing to a room on the first floor of the house.

"He's up there!"

"Well don't just stand there, baka! After him!"

Vegeta swatted the larger saiyan across the head before charging into the house. Chichi was humming quietly, preparing food for supper when one short blue blur followed by a larger orange blur sped through the kitchen and up the stairs. Nature took a few moments to rearrange itself along with all the kitchen contents. She twitched, looking at the kitchen that spontaneously fell apart as soon as she breathed.

Upstairs, Vegeta and Goku had cornered the largest saiyan with his laptop. He'd just sent E-mail to both Bulma and Chichi with links to the various Yaoi sites that he'd found. Unfortunately he now had to face the music.

"So what was oh so 'tasty' piece of information you found out?" Vegeta advanced on the larger saiyan trying to look at the laptop which was obviously the source of the information. Goku stood off to one side scratching his head.

"I thought you hated computers since…." Raditz paused in what he was doing to glare evilly at his little brother, his tail fluffing up to three times its normal size. Goku lifted his hands and chuckled nervously "Nevermind…"

A few minutes later, a smug Raditz had organised a series of sites full of NC- 17 images of Goku and Vegeta.

"I'll leave you two to it. It's quite self explanatory." With a hasty wave, the large saiyan made his escape… through the nearest window. Which happened to be closed. Raditz sweatdropped as he shook glass shards from his hair. 'I hope Chichi doesn't notice any time soon.' He thought with a nervous twitch.


Goku sat down in front of the laptop, blinking cluelessly. "It can't be anything too bad…" He mused while maximising a few of the windows that his brother had left open deliberately. Several things happened at once.

The orange clad saiyan let out a shriek of terror while turning tomato red. He sprang from the small wooden chair, darting around the room holding his eyes. "It burn's it burns! It's not true! It's not!" After several moments of acting like he was being branded by hundreds of hot pokers, Goku's heart finally gave out and the large saiyan collapsed in a dead faint.

Unfortunately, this saiyan was particularly heavy, thus the floor gave way sending the larger saiyan crashing down to the ground floor, landing on the already destroyed kitchen table. Vegeta lifted a brow at the abnormal behaviour.

"Coward, what could be so…. S-s-so…" The prince caught a glimpse of one maximised image. All the synapses in his brain fired at once, overloading his brain. The shorter saiyan also fell victim to unconsciousness, not even bothering to comprehend how such material had been available publicly.


Several days later...

"Vegeta, I need a word with you." Bulma looked up from her coffee calmly, not offering the saiyan prince the luxury of escaping this confrontation. She dragged the short saiyan into an office where one of her internet ready computers stood, with the dreaded NC-17 images maximised on screen.

"I got this the other day. Care to explain?" The blue haired scientist tapped her fingers on the desk irritably. Vegeta went through several shades of red before he got control of his fear, and then channelled the energy towards his anger. The temperamental prince threw back his head, bursting into super saiyan mode before screaming.

"RADDITZUUUUUUUUUUUU!"

A certain first class saiyan looked up from his laptop in the general direction of Capsule Corporation, glad that he was not within range of the saiyan prince.

'Yes revenge is truly sweet' Raditz thought in delight.

One lesson to all, never underestimate a saiyan.


End Part 2

Well how was it? I have an idea for a third and final part. If i get good reviews then I'll go ahead with it.

Turles: Please don't I dont wanna suffer too

Tough. Bwaahahaaa.