PART XV: THE CALM BEFORE THE DINNER

"ANGRY! HUNGRY!" Kenishiro shouted. "Come forth…we must have a forced meeting…about Forced Gluttony."

"You mean…" Angry said unsurely, "…there is a way to counter even that?"

"Of course," Kenishiro replied. "Have you ever heard of the technique…Spoiled Baby?"

"The technique that once again brought power back to the virii…and ultimately was able to destroy the maverick Navi who challenged me?" Hungry asked in a relieved yet anxious tone.

"You moron, that wasn't Spoiled Baby…you ate him to death, you pig!" shouted Angry, very angrily as usual.

"Oh right," Hungry replied with a somewhat childish yet sinister grin. "He was delicious!"

"If you two are quite finished…I have a new technique to teach both of you," Kenishiro said, lowering his head. "It only works if the two of you are alive, and you'll need to be at equal levels of power to use it, for that is how the technique works."

"Very well," Angry muttered. "What is this technique…the Spoiled Baby?"

"Listen carefully," Kenishiro whispered. "The secret of the Spoiled Baby is…"

DENSAN CITY MIDDLE SCHOOL

Lunch break. The one hour of school where time seemed to pass normally, the one hour where students could escape their classes and just relax and eat with their friends. And yet for one student named Netto Hikari, such relaxation would not come, for he feared the coming of an impossible decisive battle.

Netto sat idly, a grim expression plastered into his face and his brown hair spread across his sky-blue bandanna. How would Rockman be able to build up enough stamina to use Forced Gluttony in time for the attack of Angry and Hungry?

"Netto-kun, if I'm not up to the technique, who is?" Rockman asked his operator sternly. "We may not be the smartest, but we are certainly the most powerful of the team."

"Rockman…I'm afraid," Netto murmured ominously. "If you get eaten to death…"

Rockman felt a chill run up his spine, and cried desperately, "Netto…PLEASE don't mention that fate…I don't think I can stand it."

Suddenly, Netto felt a stinging pain manifest in his right cheek, and before he could react to it, a sudden blast of force that followed knocked him to one side. He knew immediately what had happened, even if he hadn't seen it. Meiru had slapped him. Hard.

"You baka, Netto!" Meiru cried. "What business do YOU have fighting against Angry and Hungry? Why can't someone else do it?"

"Ohhh boy," Rockman and Roll muttered simultaneously, putting themselves into Sleep Mode to avoid witnessing Meiru's hissy fit.

Netto did what he usually did to get out of these awkward situations with Meiru: he made up a flurry of rapid-fire excuses. "I have a father with plenty of scientific genius to mooch off of. I'm one of the youngest and most skillful Net Saviors in Japan. I have a strong hatred of telemarketers…"

"You gonna do the whole catalog?" Meiru murmured. "But anyway…can't you see what would happen if I had to live without you?"

Netto hated this part the worst: the standard run-of-the-mill soap opera scene. No matter what threats Adver Man was capable of, absolutely nothing could match the hideous horror of a young woman whose mouth was at full, furious efficiency. Deciding that ignorance was the better part of valor, he decided to take a passive stance in the argument:

"Meiru…uhhh, mm hmm."

"Then what WOULD happen, Netto?"

"Mm hmm."

"I don't understand why you won't listen to me! You're always like this! Why do you toy with my emotions and place your life on the line without thinking about what I feel?"

"Mm hmm."

"And don't you realize it? This is a battle you can't win!"

"Mm hmm."

"Then why, Netto? Why are you being so stupid?"

"Mm hmm."

"Netto…I have a gun to my head."

Netto's head perked up. "Er, Meiru, what are you doing?"

"Oh, so NOW I have your attention, do I?" Meiru muttered under her breath. "Fine. If you have to be this stupid, then I'll have to be stupid along with you."

"Are you sure?" Netto asked, raising an eyebrow. "If that's going to be the case…you've got a LOT to live up to…"

"I'll fight Angry and Hungry with you."

"M-Meiru-chan…"

"Netto, it's the only way to break you out of your insanity. I'll have to place my life on the line with yours. It's the only way you can ever train with full intensity…as if your life depended on it."

Netto placed his roller skate attachments onto his sneakers and solemnly turned to Meiru, saying, "If that's the way you want it, Meiru-chan. I know how stubborn you are, so I won't try to talk you out of it. I should warn you, however, that we may have to use the Soul Unison technique to defeat him. Are you…up to it?"

"Of course, my darling little…er, Netto! Ignore that last part!"

"Women," Netto shrugged as he skated off into the distance. Meiru turned back to a shadowed figure waiting around the corner and said, "Was that surprising?"

"Yes, it was," the shadowed figure replied. "I'm surprised he learned the secret of Roll's stamina and added HP abilities during Soul Unison. I suppose he didn't become a Net Savior at his age for no reason. He reminds me of myself as a child."

"So…do you think we convinced him?"

The shadowed figure around the corner made a satisfied smile, then replied, "That was…perfect."

ELSEWHERE IN JAPAN…

"What an incredible technique!" Angry cried while grinning maniacally. "With both of us using this technique…we are sure to win!"

"Indeed," Kenishiro replied, making a mirror image of Angry's grin. "Now you realize why the two of you are called the Undefeatable Gluttons Bonnie and Clyde."

"WHO GAVE US THAT NAME?" Hungry shouted, even angrier than Angry.

"Er…well…I did," Kenishiro replied, his grin dissipating.

"After our battle," Angry forced himself to say between clenched teeth, "remind us to go after YOU."

"Understandable."

"Angry…it's time for us to go," Hungry said to his comrade, and with that, the two Adver Metools disappeared, on their way to properly dispose of Rockman and his friends.

THE NEXT DAY…

"Thanks for meeting me here, Meiru," Netto said, smiling at his companion.

"What are friends for?" Meiru replied cheerfully, while winking and patting Netto's messy mane of hair.

"Well then…shall we get started?"

"Absolutely. Slur?"

Slur materialized in a blinding flash of white light. Obviously, Netto and Meiru came prepared, for they had already donned their sunglasses.

"I came as I was ordered," Slur said solemnly. "Rockman, Roll…prepare yourself! Virus Summon!"

A vast army of various types of virii materialized before Roll and Rockman as both of them performed a Soul Unison to become Roll Soul Rockman. Now ready to face the overwhelming numbers, the combined Navi prepared itself to train, and train hard.

A FEW HOURS LATER, THAT SAME DAY…

"Keep going, you two," Slur shouted at Roll Soul Rockman as he continued to pummel a vast virus army. "With your soul completely in alignment with Roll's, Rockman, this many virii should be easy for you."

"Is…this…necessary?" Roll Soul Rockman huffed. "We've…already…leveled up…by two levels!"

"That's not enough! You still don't have enough stamina or health to match Hungry in Forced Gluttony, much less Angry in attack points!"

"And why are you wearing those?"

"These?" Slur asked, pointing to her whistle and a cap with the word "COACH" etched onto it. "It makes the training that much harsher."

"Not for me, it doesn't."

"Thinking like that will get you nowhere! As the subordinate of Duo assigned to try humanity for survival, it is my job to make you worthy of fighting off evil! Now again! LEVEL UP FASTER!" she shouted forcefully as she blew her whistle.

Unfortunately, the resulting effect was not quite one that Rockman or Slur wished to see. The entire virus army disappeared, and their surroundings suddenly became pitch black.

"No…" Slur murmured, knowing something ominous was about to manifest. "They're not ready…anytime but NOW!"

An ominous black storm cloud approached Roll Soul Rockman and Slur, who entered their battle-ready poses in nervous anticipation. At last, just before the cloud engulfed them, it began to disappear as both Navis suddenly heard two high-pitched voices.

"Prepare yourself for the ultimate end!" shouted one gleeful voice.

"For no one has ever been able to defeat us!" shouted the other temperamental yet still high-pitched voice.

"It's them!" cried Roll Soul Rockman. "The ultimate Bonnie and Clyde duo…"

"…ANGRY AND HUNGRY!" shouted the two voices simultaneously. "PLEASED TO MEET YOU, DAMMIT!"

The dark cloud dissipated and two Adver Metools appeared; one with a fork and spoon, as well as a stupid grin on its face; and the other with an anime vein popping wildly on his forehead, with weapons on either side of his body resembling incredibly powerful blaster cannons.

Roll Soul Rockman manifested his right arm into a bow and arrow, preparing to destroy the two evil monstrosities, when Slur put her hand on his shoulder and shouted desperately, "No! You aren't ready! We have to retreat now…modesty is the better part of valor!"

"DON'T USE QUOTES I CAN'T POSSIBLY UNDERSTAND!" screamed Netto. "Roll Soul Rockman! Attack them NOW!"

"DOUBLE ROLL ARROW!" Roll Soul Rockman fired a precisely aimed Roll Arrow at Angry and Hungry, which then split into two. Amazingly, just before the attacks made impact, both of them disappeared into thin air. The only noise that was ever heard was a slight whoosh, as if a delicate breeze had just passed over the battlefield.

"What…what is that?" Meiru muttered, an expression of hopelessness on her face. "Before the attack could even made contact…it was neutralized!"

Angry suddenly popped up and shouted, "Aren't you forgetting someone? If there is one thing I dislike, it is being ignored by the likes of both of you! Feel the sting of…ULTIMATE ANGERED BLAST!"

Another slight whoosh passed Slur's ear, and she grabbed Roll Soul Rockman and jumped out of the way. In a deafening blast of energy, Angry annihilated a patch of Internet off in the distance, nearly a mile in diameter.

"Wow, Angry!" Hungry shouted gleefully while jumping up and down stupidly. "That was wonderful…and you weren't even at full power!"

"Wouldn't want to overheat the big guns!" Angry replied, almost sadistically. "Considering the extent of my abilities, I'd say that was about…ten percent!"

"Same here!" Hungry shouted happily. "We make a GREAT team, Clyde!"

"If you call me that again, I'll destroy YOU…BONNIE!"

Meiru shuddered and moaned, "Ten…percent? So…this is the power of Angry and Hungry…" Looking over at Netto, she expected to see a horrified and hopeless expression of forebearing doom, but a sweat drop manifested on her forehead when all she saw was a cocky grin.

Netto whistled and then said in an impressed tone, "So you're Hungry, and you must be Angry, eh? I think I'll test you out before this fight."

"Do your worst!" Hungry yelled happily. "That last attack was good! Give me more!"

"You got it!" Roll Soul Rockman replied. "How about the main course? Roll Annihilator! Twenty percent!"

With that, he manifested his hand into a pink buster and shot a blast at the two of them that was nearly as wide as his body was tall. Again, the attack disappeared before he did any damage.

"Wait a minute…" Slur thought to herself. "Roll Soul Rockman's attacks aren't disappearing…Hungry just eats incredibly fast!"

"I wonder," Netto said while rubbing his chin and grinning, "how do you two defend and attack so well?"

"Since you'll die anyway," Angry said ominously, "I see no problem in revealing the secret of our techniques to you!"

"Do tell," Slur replied.

"ABSOLUTE MOUTH CONTROL!" Hungry replied, stretching his mouth so that it extended 15 feet in either direction.

"ABSOLUTE POWER CONTROL!" Angry replied, expanding his cannons into two very powerful-looking and impressively gargantuan battleship cannons.

"Good…God…" Meiru cried. "With a mouth like that, no wonder Hungry has no trouble defending against and absorbing our attacks!"

"Heh…and with cannons like that," Netto said cockily, "no wonder Angry can attack so powerfully!"

"Since you went through the trouble of making yourselves known as threats to our existence," Hungry said, grinning maniacally as Angry continued, "we'll make sure to make your final battle an exciting one!"

"And since you're attacking us as a pair," Slur said, grinning, "we shall be sure to make your last battle a fair one!"

Netto looked dramatically into the sky as fire raged in his determined eyes. "Finally…my instinct for battle has provided me with worthy opponents! Now, Roll Soul Rockman! Attack!"

"Not without me!" shouted Slur as the two of them rushed headstrong into the flame of battle.

As the two sides rushed to attack each other, an ominous aura surrounded the battlefield. An aura that signaled that not only would this battle cause massive destruction, sorrow, and pain, but that this was a desperate all-or-nothing fight to the death.

The Angelic Defenders of the Internet, Roll Soul Rockman and Slur.

The Unstoppable Bonnie and Clyde duo, Angry and Hungry.

Light and dark, good and evil came together in a blinding flash and a deafening clash of weaponry, and what happened next…had to be seen to be believed.

END PART 15