Chapter 14

"We already have a plan," Josh says to her.

"We do?" she asks skeptically. So far, I'd say she's not such a big fan of the plan.

"Yes, it's called The Being Together For The Rest Of Our Lives Without Ruining Our Careers Plan," he says emphatically. I think he hears the Imperial butter fanfare when he says the title of the plan. You remember that commercial? Whenever someone said butter, you'd hear a little trumpet fanfare? Well, I think Josh hears that in his head when he says the title of the plan. He gets this look of…pride in his eyes. Anyway, when he says the title, CJ stares at him for a brief second and then starts laughing. Toby looks down and laughs quietly himself.

"That's your title?" Toby asks.

"Yes."

"That's your title?" he asks again.

"Yes, what's wrong with it?"

"It's not a title, it's a novel." And when he says that, I laugh.

"Donna!" Josh squeaks at me.

"I'm sorry, honey, I love you." I string out the word love and kiss him on the cheek.

He huffs for a few seconds while the rest of us try to control ourselves, then mumbles to himself, "It's a very good plan," which only makes CJ start laughing again.

Finally, we calm down and CJ says, "Ok, tell us about your very good novel plan."

He looks at her like she's evil, which, let's face it, she is. "I don't like you very much."

"Really? I put you and Donna in a bed together, which led to your marriage. I'd think you'd like me a lot right now."

"First of all, there was no question that someday Donna and I would get married, you just bumped up the timeline. Second, that was not your intention when you put us in a bed together, and third, well…you're being mean to me."

"Are you going to tell us the plan, or are you just going to whine like a child all day?" Toby asks him. Then he turns to me. "You just signed up for a lifetime of this." I just nod.

"Ok," Josh says a little loudly. "I think we've picked on Josh enough. Let's get on with the plan."

"Yes," says Toby. "Let's."

"Thank you Toby. Step one on the plan was to get married in a very non-drunk sort of way. Flowers, limousines, pictures, proper rings, proper attire, etc. We've completed step one."

"Very good," CJ says sarcastically.

"Step two on the plan…"

"Josh," I interrupt.

"What?"

"They don't need to know what step two was."

He smirks at me. "Really?"

"Really," I say giving him a look. He knows what look he's getting.

"I think they do."

"They most certainly do not."

"Step two included lots and lots of wedding night sex," he says to Toby and CJ, and then looks at me again. "You should have though about that before you laughed at the plan title," he says, raising his eyebrows at me. That's my husband. Very mature, isn't he?

"I gather you've completed step two of the plan," Toby says.

"As a matter-of-fact, yes," Josh says to him.

"I'm getting those details at lunch later this week, right?" CJ asks me.

"Absolutely."

"Donna!" Josh squeaks again.

"You should have thought about that before you spouted off about step two," I say the same way he said it to me.

He looks at me for a few seconds, with that same look of evilness he gave CJ, and then grabs me by the back of the neck and plants a long deep kiss on me before my brain even has time to register that it's going to happen.

"Ok, let's move on with the plan details," Toby says, disgusted with the pda going on.

"Right, sorry," Josh says. "Actually, no I'm not sorry." He leans over and kisses me again.

"The plan Josh, the plan," Toby says a bit more sternly.

"Right. Step number three on the plan is…hmm…I don't remember."

"You don't remember?" Toby asks.

"A little preoccupied with step number two there, were you?" CJ asks.

I smile and step in for my brilliant husband. "Step number three was telling the two of you."

"Yes," says Josh. "Step number three was telling the two of you and that step has been completed. Step number four is the four of us telling Leo."

"The four of us?" CJ asks.

"He can't hurt me with witnesses in the room."

"But he can fire you," Toby says.

"Ahh…but he won't. Because we're going to be a team, Toby," he says, stressing the word team. "And we're going tell him how we're going to deal with the press."

"And how are we going to deal with the press?" CJ asks, stressing the word we.

"Ahh… that would be step five of the plan."

"The Being Together For The Rest Of Our Lives Without Ruining Our Careers Plan," CJ deadpans.

"Yes, that's the one."

She turns to me. "The rest of your life." Then she turns back to Josh. "And what is step five?"

"Honesty. Complete and total honesty. Full Disclosure. But that's as far as we got. That's where you two come in."

"So basically, the plan was get married, have sex, and then beg CJ and myself for help," Toby says.

"Exactly!"

"Honesty. You think that'll do it?" she asks.

"Yes."

"So I just walk into the pressroom and say, 'by the way, Josh Lyman married his assistant this weekend,' and there will be no questions?"

"No, there will be questions, but instead of no comment, you answer them."

"I answer them?"

"Yes."

She ponders this for a second, which is precisely when my phone rings. I pull it out of my purse and look at the display. "Oh no," I say quietly.

"What?" Josh asks me.

"My parents," I say in a voice of dread.

"Ohhhh…." he says slowly, stifling a laugh. I shoot him a death glare.

"Have you told them?" CJ asks.

"Kind of," I say weakly.

"She left it on their machine," Josh says, in a not so supportive voice if you ask me.

I shrug. "They weren't home."

"Go ahead," Josh says to me, trying to keep from laughing and failing.

"Noooo…." I say, shaking my head back and forth.

"Donna…"

"Fine," I huff at him, and hit my send button. "Hello?"

"Married?" my mother screams into the phone.

"Mom, hi. I can't really talk right now."

"I come home from church to a message saying you got married, and you can't talk? You will talk, Donnatella."

"We can talk later, but…"

My mom interrupts me. "Are you pregnant?"

"What? No!" I scream.

"Calm down, I was just checking," she says calmly.

"Mom, I have to…"

"Are you going to bring him home for Thanksgiving next month?"

"We haven't really…"

"Your grandmother is going to be heartbroken that she wasn't there. She wanted you to wear her dress." I glance over to see Josh staring at me and smiling. I give him an evil eye and he just smirks at me.

"I know, but it was a spur …"

"And Mary Boggs asked me today if you were ever going to settle down and have children. I can't wait to call her and…"

"You can't tell her yet, Mom."

"Fine. Are you going to be moving out of that dreadful apartment of yours?"

"Yes, although it's not dreadful. I'll be mov…"

"Oh, you need to register. Everyone will want to know about gifts. And I'll need your new address and phone number."

"Mom, can't we discu…"

"And you should plan a party. Like an open house, here in town." Josh is still laughing. I hold the phone out for him to take it, but he shakes his head back and forth and whispers, "I'll be good."

"Mother. Listen to me. I can't do this right now. We're trying to hash out some work..."

"They aren't going to make you quit, are they?" I look at Toby, who's very amused at my expense as well. He gets the same evil eye Josh got.

"I don't know. That's what…"

"You tell them that that man wouldn't be half the politician he is without you there with him."

"Mom, it's not that sim…."

"He wouldn't last a day without you."

"Mom, I have to go. We'll talk tonight."

She takes a long breath. "Fine. Give my son-in-law a kiss for me and tell him he has to come up here and meet the family."

"Yes Mom."

"And you're going to e-mail me pictures tonight?"

"I promise."

"And you're happy?"

I can't help smiling when she says that. "Happier than ever."

"I knew it. Love you Honey."

"You too. Talk to you tonight." I hang up and kiss Josh on the cheek. "That was from my mom."

"Good thing you didn't use tongue then," CJ says. Josh and Toby both cringe.

"Ok," Toby says. "As fun as it was to watch Donna's face contort in pain, I think we should get back to the plan."

"The Being Together For The Rest…"

"We've got it," CJ interrupts Josh, which makes him pout. She looks at me and points to him. "The rest of your life."

"So, complete honesty?" Toby says.

"Yes."

"They'll think you've been dating in secret," CJ says.

"Point out my last failed relationship with Amy."

"Joshua, I thought I told you not to say her name."

His eyes get big. "But, if I'd referred to her as 'the bitch', they wouldn't have known who I was talking about."

"Yes we would have," CJ says.

"Absolutely," Toby adds.

"Ok… but still. We've both openly dated other people within the last year."

"That'll help," says Toby.

"They'll ask if she's pregnant," CJ says.

"Maybe, maybe not," says Josh.

"My mom just did," I say.

"She did?" he screeches.

"Yep. Maybe you should just announce it when you announce the wedding. 'Josh Lyman and Donna Moss got married this weekend, and no, she's not pregnant. They're simply in love,'" I say, kidding.

"Yeah, that'd go over well," Josh says, chuckling.

"Actually," says Toby. "That's exactly what I'd do. I'd give all the information up front. 'Josh Lyman and his senior assistant, Donna Moss were married in a private ceremony this weekend in Atlantic City and no she's not pregnant. And before you ask, no, they haven't been dating, in fact they've both recently dated other people. There simply comes a time when you stop fighting the obvious, and for them that was this weekend. We at the White House are ecstatic for both of them, especially for Josh, who has definitely married up. As far as work is concerned, they're both planning on staying in their current positions for the foreseeable future, unless Donna gets sick of him and takes one of the many job offers she receives on a regular basis. Carol's passing out some jpeg's of the beautiful ceremony for you to publish as you see fit, and Donna's apartment will be going up for rent this week if anyone's looking.' You make it all sound light and funny, but before they can speculate, you've taken away the notion of pregnancy, them living together before getting married, or Donna being fired. You also make Josh look like the lucky one and point out her reputation of being amazing at her job, which will deflect the name calling."

"I could ask the President for a comment. Keep everything positive. We couldn't be happier," CJ says.

"Maybe arrange for a few republicans to comment on record that they're happy for us," Josh says.

"Matt Skinner," I say.

CJ looks at me. "Be prepared to show documentation of separate hotel rooms on business trips, in case it comes up."

I nod. "We keep all receipts, I can pull up any trip they ask about."

"So," says CJ. "This is the plan."

"This is the plan. The Being Together For The Rest Of Our Lives Without Ruining Our Careers Plan. You can make it work?" Josh asks her hopefully.

She nods. "You'll get a little lip, but I can keep it to a minimum, and I'm not calling it that."

"Ok, then," Toby says, handing Josh the bill for breakfast. "We better get going, we've got a three hour drive. Josh's buying." Josh doesn't even complain; he just tosses a few bills on the table, takes my hand, and we head out.

"We'll call Leo on the way and have him meet us at the office," CJ says as we leave the restaurant.

As we walk through the casino on our way out of the hotel I look around at the slot machines and blackjack tables. "A weekend in Atlantic City and I didn't gamble at all. Not one bit."

CJ looks at Josh and then at me. "Oh yes you did."

zzzzzzzzz

The end. Thanks so much for taking time to read it. I hope you enjoyed.