Chapter 2: Toothpaste

So Harry left the hospital wing, and walked up the stairs towards Gryffindor Tower, however he didn't reach for his quill and parchment, he had absolutely no intention to do his homework. Ron was clearly in denial about his feelings for Hermione and Harry could only think of two people who could come up with an idea to get him to admit his feelings to himself. So he picked up a fistful of glittering Floo powder put his head in the fire and said "Weasley's Wizard Wheezes".

"Fred, George!"

"Blimy! Hello Harry, what brings you here? Is ickle Ronniekins causing you grief?"

"Or you don't know what flowers Ginny likes?" George added

"What?" Harry said, cracking his head on the fireplace.

"Nothing," George replied quickly, he was well aware of how close to the surface Harry's temper is these days "So what's up with Ron?"

"He's in love with Hermione." Harry said simply

"And I'm assuming that neither of them know the truth?"

"Yup."

"Have you tried locking them in an enclosed space?" Fred suggested

"No, Hermione's claustrophobic and it's against Hogwarts rules."

"Locking two people in a cupboard is against Hogwarts rules?"

"No, its what they might get up to in the cupboard that's against the rules."

"Ah, that would be a bit of a problem. I'm surprised that ickle Ronniekins knows about that sort of thing!"

"Shut up Fred!"

A bell tinkled somewhere and both twins looked up, Fred said

"I'll go" quickly and George sat there looking thoughtful, but no more ideas came.

"Never mind," Harry said, "Ginny might have an idea on what to do."

"Ok, see you later Harry." and with those words, George disappeared from view to join Fred.

When Harry came back to the common room, the bell had gone and people were beginning to arrive to relax before tea, including Ginny and her friends.

"Gin, can I have a word?" Harry was painfully reminded of asking Cho Chang to the Yule ball in his fourth year when Ginny's mates began giggling incessantly. Ginny sensing Harry's awkwardness gave her friends a look that scorched - no doubt inherited from her mother, they fell silent and Ginny and Harry walked out of earshot.

"So what is it then Harry?" Ginny appeared to have been practising cheering charms that afternoon too.

"Its Ron," Ginny's face fell for a fraction of a second, then she carried on as if nothing had happened.

"What about him?"

"He's not admitting to liking Hermione, and I want him to at least admit his feelings to himself, do you know how much it tortures me seeing them like that every day, every lesson. You get the jist."

Ginny looked thoughtful for a second before her face lit up then fell again

"No locking them in a cupboard won't work - Hermione's claustrophobic."

"Fred suggested that," Harry told her dully, then her face lit up for a second time.

"I've got it - make Ron jealous, flirt with Hermione!"

"Gin," Harry complained "I like my face the shape it is - cant you ask Dean to do it instead?"

"Dean won't even give me the time these days, not since I ditched him." Harry looked at Ginnys face, it was too good to be true, he didn't know why his heart lightened at this news, and he couldn't help but wonder why his stomach flipped like when you miss a step going downstairs.

"You dumped Dean?"

"He just wasn't for me, and I'm not putting up with second best until the right person comes." she gave Harry a very significant look as she said this.

"Oh." Harry's mind seemed to have filled with this blank buzzing.

"If I think of anything I'll let you know."

"Thanks Gin."

Harry went up to his dormitory to get a library book that needed returning, trying to ignore the blank buzzing that was stopping him from thinking straight, wondering numbly why he had that strange feeling in his stomach when Ginny told him that she'd ditched Dean. He walked across the crowded common room and climbed through the portrait hole. Harry was just considering popping into the hospital wing on the way back to see if Ron and Hermione had got anywhere in his absence when he heard his name being called.

"Harry, HARRY!"

"Oh hi Ginny!"

"I've been racking my brains Harry and I've got an idea, all I need is a quiet word with Hermione and it's in the bag."

"Aren't you gonna tell me this master plan?"

"Sorry Harry, no, Ron will probably be with you when it happens, and I don't want you to accidentally let Ron smell a rat."

"I'll take your word for it, I'll be with him when what happens?"

"I'm not going to tell you Harry, sorry but we'll need Hermione in on this, I know that she's fancied Ron for ages you see, and I cant see any reason why she'll turn down this plan, she won't know what its really for. He'll never work up the guts on his own."

"You're going to tell her why we're doing this? Wouldn't Ron get a bit mad if he found out?"

"She's not gonna know why, neither will Ron, I've got a ready made reason."

"Reason for what?"

"Harry I'm sorry, but no, I won't be long, she shouldn't take much persuasion."

"Ginny tell me."

Ginny sighed "Harry please I know what to do, why don't you go back to the common room?"

"And do homework?" Harry shuddered

"Haven't you got that essay to do for Potions?"

"Aww Ginny! You could take over Hermione! Give me a break please!"

"Go on then, see you Harry."

"Bye Ginny."

With these words, Harry headed along the corridor to the library, his mind buzzing full of theories, all of which involved locking Ron and Hermione in an enclosed space, or risking the shape of his nose.

The next day Ron and Hermione were out of the hospital wing and snapping at each other again as always. Hermione seemed to be keeping something quiet about Ron, and if anything she was arguing with him more, as if he had upset her, however neither Harry nor Ron noticed this.

The weeks passed quickly and there was no sign of anything from Hermione about Ron, or Ginny. Harry had given up on asking Ginny what she was planning for Ron, he had almost given up on seeing anything unusual intended for Ron. That was all Harry knew, Ginny had asked Hermione to do something to Ron, or for Ron. Harry was now beginning to dread what it might be.

About a month after that fateful lesson, Harry and Ron were heading back to Gryffindor Tower after a wet and muddy Quiddich practice, where Hermione had promised them that she would be doing her homework. Harry was trying a new tactic in the absence of Ginnys plan, as he hadn't seen anything that seemed aimed to get Ron and Hermione together.

"So, Ron got a crush on anybody we know?" Harry asked as casually as he could.

"Harry are you alright mate?"

"Yeah why shouldn't I be?"

"You seem to have taken a sudden interest in my love life, you never bothered before."

"No, I was just thinking about how much you argue with Hermione, you two are beginning to sound like an old married couple."

"You fancy her don't you Harry?" damn it's backfiring Harry thought desperately

"I do not!"

"You do, you mentioned her name first!"

"You jumped to conclusions!"

"He hath denies too much!"

"Shakespeare? What are you on Ron?"

"Yeah Harry go on, admit it, you've liked her for ages haven't you?"

"NO, I DON"T FANCY HER! YOU DO!"

"You just wanted to see my opinion of her to see if the coast is clear, didn't you Harry?"

"No! For god's sake Ron, why are you so fussed, you fancy her, and you're my best mate, I'd never do that to you."

"I don't fancy her. I…"

"DO YOU TWO WANT TO COME IN OR NOT?" shrieked the fat lady who had been listening to the argument for the past five minutes, trying to get her views heard.

"Sorry, mimblewimble." Ron muttered, his ears still glowing scarlet from when Harry first mentioned Hermione, Harry burst out laughing at the look on Ron's face when the fat lady yelled.

When they entered the common room, it was deserted.

"Hermione?" Harry asked

Ron went to look behind the table, which still had her books lying open on it.

"Oh my God!" Ron squeaked suddenly "Hermione please no, no!"

Harry ran round to find Ron crying over Hermione, she was lying unconscious on the common room floor, her face pale.

"Ron you idiot check for her pulse, and if shes breathing!" Ron immediately started running his fingers around Hermione's wrists muttering distractedly

"God Hermione, not before NEWTs, we won't survive, Hermione, I love you, I don't want you to leave without me, please Hermione..."

Suddenly Hermione's fingers closed around Ron's hand and her eyes snapped open.

"Ron do you really mean it?" Ron took one look at Hermione sitting up in his arms, nodded slowly and fainted.

"Hermione what the hell happened, does this have anything to do with Ginny?"

"Yes, she said that she wanted me to do that to Ron in revenge for putting toothpaste in her hair during the summer."

"I see."

"I'm surprised he said all that though, I'm amazed he had the guts."

"Hang on Hermione, He's waking up."

Ron was stirring, he groaned and sat up, causing him to groan a bit more. He stared at Hermione kneeling in front of him looking concerned, his memory suddenly came back to him, he looked at Hermione with fearful eyes.

"Hermione, are you ok? What happened?"

"Ginny persuaded me to trick you, after you put toothpaste in her hair over the summer."

"Oh, so it was just a joke!" Ron groaned again sitting up further.

"Harry can you do me a favour and get Ron a drink of water, sorry Ron but you look like you need some."

"I know I look like a gargoyle."

"Maybe not that bad."

"Hermione can I ask you a question?"

"Go on."

"When I thought you were dead, did you by any chance hear what I was saying?"

"What do you think Ronald, you were right next to me!"

"Well…I…um…" but his words were interrupted by Hermione.

"You idiot! You're not telling me that you don't know that I feel the same!"

"Hermione, that's not funny."

"Do I look like I'm joking? Surely you would've worked out by now that I love you!"

With that, she kissed him full on the mouth and Ron, whose ears were glowing brighter then the sun, seemed rather dazed. Hermione looked up to find Harry and Ginny almost dying of silent laughter, standing in the shadows by the dormitory stairs.

"I don't think it's fair really," said Ginny giggling "Ron gets the girl of his dreams and I get hair smelling of Colgate for three months!"

"I thought you were getting water Harry." squeaked a very calm Hermione, considering the fact that she had just been caught snogging one of her best friends, by none other then his little sister and best friend.

Ron was still trying to get to grips with what had just happened, when he finally remembered how to talk he muttered,

"That was bloody brilliant!" then he fainted with shock.

At this point Harry, who had been having trouble breathing from laughter, went blue in the face and fainted.

"Oh jeez, I thought it was girls who faint, not boys!"

a/n: Wow thanks so much guys over 200 reads on chapter 1 and no complaints (that I've heard of…)! Can I have some more reviews please? I want to know if I've done anything wrong…