Disclaimer: Need I point out for one more time that I am not the original owner of Harry Potter? I am not making any money off of this story. But, oh, wouldn't that be loverly? By Golly Gee Whiz Ya Betcha!
Nothing ever
stops all these thoughts and the pain attached to them
Sometimes
I wonder why this is happenin'
I felt something touching me. I couldn't tell what it was but it was annoying and it hurt. Didn't the thing that was touching me know that I was just scratched within an inch of my life? Wouldn't you think they'd be gentle? But no, of course, no one is that gentle.
It was my own fault anyway. I could have let that chimera tear Malfoy apart. Why didn't I? Here I was in the most pain I had ever been in and I had a choice of doing it or not. How stupid am I?
Wait a second! Where am I? Am I at Hogwarts? St. Mungo's? Who's touching me? Am I dead? Is this what it feels like to be dead? A zillion thoughts rushed by in a whirlwind in my head. Thoughts that puzzled me and confused me even more. And all the time I couldn't concentrate on one thought because with each touch the person gave to me I felt even more pain.
Ever so slowly things started to come back together. I could hear a little bit at a time. Even though it was soft and muttered, I could make out just enough to give me some information. With every bit of information I got, I grew steadily more confused.
"She isn't expected to live," A voice said with a crack in their soft voice.
"We need basilisk blood right away. She won't live otherwise!" Another said in a hurried tone.
"You know how rare that is!" Someone else protested. "She won't live...it's a great loss," one said sadly. Someone sniffed and blew their nose loudly. What was happening?
"But...Malfoy...lped." Yet another said.
"Lped! That's a new one," I thought giggling in my head. What kind of crazy word is that? Then a thought struck me. Maybe lped was just a part of a word. Duh on me! I was suppose to be smart! I promised myself that I would not die until I found what the word lped was. I lay there for what seemed like a lifetime, when in reality it was probably only about five minutes before it hit me.
Helped. Why would it take me so long to figure that out? Helped! Such a simply word!
Malfoy had helped me! It was such a weird thought that I couldn't quite grasp it. I had never seen Malfoy even say thank you when someone passed something to him, why would he help me? Let alone help me in such a big way that it saved my life?
Or almost saved my life. The voices around my bed were certainly sure that I was going to die. Weirdly enough I was not afraid of this. It was almost calming to know that it was almost over actually.
I was tired. It had been a long time since I had gotten a good rest. I slowly slipped into unconsciousness thinking about how Malfoy had helped me.
It's like nothing I can do would distract me when
I think of
how I shot myself in the back again
Cuz from the infinite words I
can say I
Put all pain you gave to me on display
I don't know when it was that I awoke next, but I supposed that it was the next day or later that evening. The voices that used to be around my bed had gone away and a new pair of voices were talking very heatedly. I tried opening my eyes, but all I could see were blurbs moving around the room and occasionally throwing a hand out to make a point.
"You have to understand," A voice said desperately. "This has only happened twice in history." There was a pregnant pause. "Ever recorded, mind you," the voice added. I knew that it was Dumbledore talking. The voice had an air in it that sounded superior and well educated.
"To who?" The second voice asked. The person was a man and I had no idea who it was. It sounded like I should be able to remember but I couldn't. It was in a tone that I didn't recognize.
"Derek Shneeble and Tara Carson, back in 1908. And the other pair was James Potter and Lily Evans," Dumbledore said and I could almost hear him smile.
"James and Lily Potter? How? What?" The voice asked in falsetto. I was surprised too. What had happened? What did they go through?
"Yes Mr. Malfoy," Ah, so it was Malfoy. I didn't recognize his voice, because it didn't have its usual whine in it. He was taught to hate Dumbledore, but he was also taught to respect his elders. I guess he got something right in his education. "But I'm afraid that that story is for another day and time." Dumbledore turned away from Malfoy and looked at me studying me for awhile before he smiled slightly, "Ah, Ms. Granger. How are you feeling?"
I tried to talk back, but I couldn't. It was taking all of my strength to open my eyes to the tiny slits that they were. There was no possible way I could respond. I just blinked slowly trying to say that I wasn't feeling very well, thanks for asking. Dumbledore nodded his head almost seeming to read my mind. "I will go fetch Madam Pomfrey. Perhaps she has something that could be of assistance." He glided away and Malfoy bounced up and down on the balls of his feet awkwardly.
He looked around like there were interesting paintings on the wall. There were none of course, but I knew that he didn't want to look at me. Again he cleaned the dirt from under his nails and tried to focus on getting them cleaner. After Dumbledore had been gone a long time he finally shot a glance in my direction. He looked extremely uncomfortable.
"A-are you alright?" he asked looking at my injuries. I too looked down at my left leg that was put in a cast. I tried wiggling a toe but I couldn't feel if I had any left. My right arm was in too many bandages to even tell I had an arm anymore.
I tried to make a noise of disgust. I wanted him to know that no, I was not alright. I was just attacked by an animal that had it out for him! How could I possibly be alright, if I couldn't feel my toes? I half snorted and half coughed. It hurt like the dickens. My chest tore painfully. I felt hot tears grace my eyes. I would have thought that Malfoy would get the message I was trying to get across, but he didn't.
"What's that supposed to mean, Granger?" he hissed. Great! Now he's being the mean Malfoy again!
Before I could try talking to him again, Dumbledore interrupted us. He was carrying a large tray filled with different types of potions. There were blue ones that bubbled, purple ones that hissed, and yellow ones that looked tasty. He set the tray down on the bedside table and picked up a tall, skinny bottle and fed it to me. "That's to help with the pain," he explained. He then grabbed the blue bubbly potion and gave it to me. It tasted horrible. "That one is for moving a bit more loosely." It burned my throat on the way down, but after a moment I could feel my toes again!
"So, Ms. Granger, how are you feeling?" he asked pleasantly, organizing the potions absentmindedly, as if I wasn't lying on a bed in too many casts to count.
"Frozen," was my sophisticated remark. Why did I just have to say that? I try so hard to be intelligent around Dumbledore that I come out more of a dork. "Because all my muscles are jammed up or something," I continued trying to make up for my slip of brilliance.
"Yes, I suppose they would be frozen. But, right now we have more important things to talk about," he said shifting around in his seat glancing at Malfoy for a second. Malfoy nodded and took a seat on the other side of my bed.
Took what I hated and made it apart of me
Never goes away,
Never goes away
"Well, first of all, I need to know exactly what happened out there," he said placing his fingertips together thoughtfully.
I let Malfoy take over for that one. "Well, Weasley, or um, Ginny," I could tell he had trouble saying her name without disgust. "She screamed and I went to see what the problem was. I guess she did too," he said waving his arm in my direction instead of, God forbid, saying the name Hermione. "Ginny had apparently just seen a crow, which she's terrified of and screamed. We were walking back to get to work again when we heard the bushes rumble."
I was not surprised to see that Malfoy left out the minor detail that he had been unmercifully teasing me before the chimera attacked. I scowled deeply at him and he rolled his eyes. I believe Dumbledore saw this but didn't remark on it.
"Then the chimera stepped out of the bushes. Draco and I stood still hoping that it would pass us by, but it didn't." It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be to say his name. "So, the chimera stepped forward to attack him, and I jumped in front of him." I thought for right now I would leave out the part that he turned his back on it. I have no idea why, but it didn't seem important at the moment.
And now
You've become a part of me
You'll always be right
here
You've become a part of me
You'll always be my fear
"Ah, I see," Dumbledore said running his hand through his beard thoughtfully. "Have either of you ever heard of the Goshawk Blessing?" He asked looking at us hopefully. I had read something about it a long time ago, but I couldn't remember anything about it. I should remember to take notes on everything! We both shook our heads. "Well, it's a curse or a blessing depending on how you'd look at it. I assume for you two, it would be a curse." Curse? I gulped. "Well, it's very old magic. Older than the four founders time actually. It's a rule in the Wizarding World. If you help another Wizard by saving their life, they're in eternal debt of you until they return the favor in a large amount."
I'm pretty sure my jaw dropped to the floor then. How could this be happening? Just because I do a favor for Malfoy he has to do one for me? That hardly makes any sense! I'm doomed! Malfoy will never do a favor for me!
I can't separate
Myself from what I've done
Giving up a
part of me
I've let myself become you
I took what I hated and made it apart of me
"So you both realize now then, that Mr. Malfoy will have to return the favor to you Ms. Granger in a great amount."
"Ya, b-b-but, how can you--" I tried reasoning. There had to be a way out of this. There were ways that dark wizards had weaseled out of things, there had to be a way to get out of this. What would happen if we didn't get even?
"I'm sure that this is Goshawk's Blessing. There are many ways to know for sure and we've checked into them."
"Like what things?" Malfoy asked almost rudely. Dumbledore didn't hear the malice in the comment. Malfoy's face was an odd color of red as he looked from Dumbledore to me. He was getting very angry very quick.
"That, is for another day too, Mr. Malfoy." His eyes twinkled merrily almost enjoying putting us through this. I could have sworn I heard him laugh under his breath, but it would have been hard to tell. Malfoy was taking very deep breaths now trying to gain some control.
"And what if I never have the time to repay her?" Malfoy forced out. Dumbledore eyed him suspiciously, and so did I. I had wanted to know the answer to the question too, but I think there was a more appropriate way of doing so. Dumbledore ignored Malfoy anger.
"I would not know. The favor has always been repaid. Let's not be the first," he said heading toward the door. I followed his slow easy steps. He turned to me when he opened the door and leaned back in to add: "Please get better Ms. Granger. You've already missed a lot of school, and I'm sure you're friends are wanting to talk to you. They've been in and out for the past couple of days." With that he left.
Get away from me
Give me my space back you gotta just
Go
Everything comes down the memories of
You
I kept it in
without letting you
Know
I let you go so get away from
Me
Give me my space back you gotta just
Go
Everything comes
down the memories of
You
I kept it in without letting you
Know
I let you go
Malfoy stared at me like I was a poisonous bug about to sting him. A scowl rose on his face like the morning sun. "I didn't ask for this either!" I shot at him.
"Oh, and this is just something that I prayed for then, huh?" He said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. He sat rather roughly into a chair across from me and sat pouting to himself, muttering things about stupid mudbloods and stupid headmasters. I ignored him and tried to think to myself. I looked around the room for something to focus on. My eyes landed on a bed across the room from me. The unmistakable head of Luna Lovegood stuck out from under the covers.
"What's wrong with Luna?" I screeched forgetting that I was mad at Malfoy. He looked at me his eyebrows raised. He didn't say anything for a moment, then he looked over at Luna slowly and then back at me.
"Oh, that," he said nonchalantly like it was no big deal. "When you left her in the woods, she was attacked by something. Great going on taking care of her, by the way!"
"How dare you!" I snapped. "If you hadn't been out pulling pranks in the first place, none of this would have happened! How can you even say that it is my fault?" But deep down I agreed that it was my fault.
"Well, it's quite simple. You just make your vocal cords vibrate in the right way," he sneered.
"Is she alright?" I asked trying desperately to change the subject. Malfoy shrugged it off.
"How should I know? She's not one of my friends."
"Argh, you're impossible!"
"That's what everyone keeps telling me," he said sneering a little almost smiling.
At first I thought it was stupid. Then as I thought about it, I thought that his last remark was kind of almost funny. He had never made conversation with me before, and this was almost close to funny. "Everyone who?"
"My father."
I dropped the subject. There's a dead end to a conversation. Malfoy's father was not something someone talked about lightly. Especially someone like me and someone like him.
So I sat for a while thinking everything over.
If Malfoy didn't repay the favor to me what would happen? Would we be alive until he did? Would we die a death worth a thousand deaths? What would happen? The thought scared me. I knew that Malfoy was not keen on helping me in any way possible. He loathed me and I loathed him. That was as far as our relationship went. If he were too actually save me from something wouldn't it require us getting even just a pinch closer?
I shivered at the thought of us getting to be friends. I had for a brief second the image of Malfoy and I sitting in a room on a couch talking about the latest gossip of Hogwarts. How absurd. Malfoy talking to me? Us talking about gossip? I was no the gossip type. I didn't even talk to Ron or Harry about gossip. I think it's disgusting.
Malfoy was just a big jig-saw puzzle. I thought of him as a test question that just needed to be broken down. It's like trying to solve a particularly hard math question without obeying the simple rules of FOIL or PEDMAS. If you do one thing out of order then the whole thing is messed up until you go back and fix it. Another puzzling thing about Malfoy was the fact that no one actually knew him.
He had masks up all the time. He wouldn't let anyone get too close. I'm not sure exactly why. I'm sure that growing up in the manor that he did it was tough to get close to someone without feeling weak, but I think that he's old enough now to form his own opinions about life, right? But what if, to solve this curse, Malfoy would have to get close to me? What if---
"I'm going to class," Malfoy said getting up from his chair suddenly, almost scaring me. I had been so lost in my thoughts that I had forgotten he was even there. I just nodded as an answer, not sure of what to say.
He paused at the door for a moment. He looked back at me his eyes meeting mine. His shone with something I couldn't read. I know mine stopped being full of anger and changed to something a little softer toward him. His hand rested on the brass handle of the door. He opened his mouth to say something, but quickly closed it, shook his head, and walked out of the room.
And then
You've become a part of me
You'll always be right
here
You've become a part of me
You'll always be my fear
I
can't separate
Myself from what I've done
Giving up a part of
me
I've let myself become you
I've let myself become you
I've
let myself become
lost inside these thoughts of you
giving up a
part of me
I've let myself become you
I took what I hated and made it apart of me
Author's Note: I'll be back on schedule kind of now. Updating and all. Thanks for all the loverly reviews! Please don't by shy!
