Bittersweet and Salty

By

Kelsey


Disclaimer: Not mine. Though as I've said before, you'd think with all the "Law and Order"s out there, they could spare one.

Author's Note: Guh-uh. Well, I actually checked over this chapter. Sorry for the mistakes in the prologue.

Summary: Someone comes back into Olivia's life, but someone else is already there. Will old love prevail, or does new love run stronger? Femslash, O/A, O/C.

Rating: PG-13 this chapter


Chapter One

"Oh."

Alex is the first one to recover, and she takes in the scene, turns on her heels and leaves. Olivia watches her go, wishing she could follow her, but she knows that any overtures she makes towards Alex right now will be rebuffed, and there's someone here who she might have a prayer of actually getting to listen to her. "Casey."

"Liv." Her nickname, that's good. "Alex is safe?"

A smile spreads across Olivia's face; she can't help it. "She's really safe," she says softly, feeling it sink in for the first time.

"And she's coming back." Casey's voice is flat.

Olivia crosses the room and puts her hand on Casey's arm. The ADA lets her, but her body remains stiff and unwelcoming. "Case, she's important to me. She's my friend, above all else."

Casey nods. "I know." She relaxes a little. "I always knew this wasn't meant to last," she says.

Olivia looks up sharply. "Not… Casey, this wasn't a fling."

"No," she agrees. "But I always knew that when Alex came back I'd have to vacate." She smiles bitterly. "It's okay."

"No, it's not!" Olivia exclaims. "I never meant for you to be an interim-fuck!"

Casey looks at her fondly and a little sadly. "I know you didn't, Liv. You let me stay in your bed and become part of your life. I know you love me in a way. But I see the look in your eyes when you look at Alex. It's just… more."

There is silence for a few long moments and then Olivia looks at the floor and shakes her head. "Casey, it's four am and I've just had the world's most crazy talk with you and total emotional exhaustion wrought upon me by Alex. Can we just go back to bed?"

"Sure." Casey turns and walks back into the bedroom, and Olivia follows her close behind. They return to bed, Casey to the way of sprawling limbs and body that she always sleeps in, Olivia curled up onto her side the way she sleeps. Neither of them sleeps.

Olivia watches Casey in the dark, the ADA's eyes stubbornly closed, and ponders this. The kind of comfort they feel, sleeping their own ways. Casey's bodily sprawl would annoy a less tolerant person, and Olivia's curled-in ball has caused more than one bedmate to wonder what they've done to upset her. But there's an easy comfort here, Olivia tolerating and even finding cute Casey's limbs all over her space, and Casey knowing that Olivia doesn't need comforting, she just sleeps better this way.

As soon as Olivia's eyes close in determination to fall asleep, she feels Casey's gaze on her. "Go to sleep," she says a little grumpily. "It's what you wanted."

Casey recognizes her not-actually-upset tone and laughs lightly. "Okay. Sleeping now."

Silence reigns in the bedroom and slowly, both occupants start to fall asleep despite raging thoughts.

Morning is awkward and quiet. Even though they were able to put aside feeling and just try to sleep when Alex first left, now they are both full of doubts. Olivia sees Casey's in her eyes as she sits at the breakfast table with coffee and yogurt, and her own are constantly running through her head. Should she have gone after Alex? Why does Casey think she's only a stand-in? How the hell is she going to figure this mess out?

Luckily, work calls, and they both leave shortly after the conclusion of the very quiet breakfast. Casey rides her bike to work, despite the fact that the early morning not-quite-May temperatures are still fairly cool, and Olivia catches the subway. Unless a pressing case comes in, they won't see each other again-- Casey has arraignments and a trial, Olivia will do paperwork and wait for a call. It's New York City and there's no shortage of twisted perverts-- SVU always has work.

Elliot is waiting when she gets there, outside. There's a cup of coffee and a paper bag in one hand and a pair of car keys in the other. "Already?" is all Olivia says.

He nods. "Came in ten minutes ago. Couldn't get a hold of you, figured you were in the subway."

Subway reception varies from bad to nonexistent, and Olivia just nods before taking the keys from her partner's hand. "Eat," she says before he can protest. "I got to eat already."

Elliot is quiet and a little jumpy during the ride. Halfway there, Olivia stops at a red light and turns to face him. "What is it, Elliot?"
"Nothing," he lies unconvincingly.

She pulls away from the light but looks over to send him a glare. "I know you. What's going on?"

Elliot fidgets a little. "You didn't by any chance get a midnight visitor last night, did you?"

Olivia looks over at him sharply, then quickly returns her eyes to the road. "Alex?"

"I guess you did."

"Well, it was more like four am, but yeah."

"She spend the night?"

Olivia doesn't look over. "No."

"Well, I guess there wasn't much night left…" he says open-endedly.

Olivia isn't in the mood to pussy-foot around the subject. "Cut the crap, Elliot."

He does as told and asks her bluntly "Why didn't she stay, then?"

"The atmosphere got a little chilly when the current guest came out of the bedroom," Olivia replies coldly.

Elliot goes quiet for a moment. "Well. I guess that would put a damper on the mood." He cocks his head. "But she's been gone months. Surely she didn't expect you to spend all of it without company."

"I don't think it was the company," Olivia replies. "I think it was the company's identity."

Elliot raises an eyebrow, but she refuses to talk about it anymore, and they're almost at the crime scene, anyway.

The crime scene is dull, forensically speaking, and the victim is dead. There's very little for them to do on-scene, so they return quickly to the squad room. Cragen is up in arms about something, and Olivia figures that means Alex hasn't paid him a visit yet. He could never be in that bad a mood right after he got that good of news.

She finds out she figured correctly when a tall blond in a pair of subtle but dressy slacks and a v-neck purple blouse walks a little anxiously into the squad room around lunch time, her two FBI bodyguards at her heels this time, instead of standing protectively in front of her. Munch and Fin rise from their desks in expectation of a victim in need, then surprise and shock and pleasure cross their faces in quick succession.

"Alex!"

Alex grins and envelops first Fin and then Munch in a tight hug. "It's good to be home," she says. She nods her head towards Cragen's office. "He here?" she asks.

Fin nods and Elliot steps up. "What, I don't rank a hug?" he says teasingly.

Alex rolls her eyes and hugs him. "I thought that was what the midnight visit was for," she says.

"Hey, how come he got a midnight visit and I didn't?" Munch asks.

Pulling out of Elliot's arms, Alex lowers her eyes and answers pragmatically "because I didn't know how to get to your house."

Olivia is thinking that she should be saying something or it will look funny, but then the door to Cragen's office opens, and she is off the hook, at least for the moment. "Alex!"

Alex smiles fondly and opens her arms. "I've been getting that response a lot lately," she says.

Cragen hugs her tightly, his eyes a little wet and his grin encompassing his whole face. "It's good to see you," he says. "Really good."

"Glad to know I was missed," Alex says, a little flippantly.

Getting the unspoken message, Cragen pulls away and smirks a little, something that looks very strange on the face of their captain to the detectives. "Had it with emotional reunions already, Cabot?" he asks. "That's just like you."

Alex rolls her eyes for the second time, and Olivia thinks that as horrible as it has been, perhaps something good has come out of witness protection. Alex certainly seems more relaxed than she did… before.

Even in her mind, Olivia sometimes has trouble thinking about 'before.' And she's so grateful that she got a chance to see Alex a few months previously, but the former ADA had hardly been like herself. Quiet, withdrawn, just wishing that it was all over… it hadn't been Alex.

The visit had left Olivia more troubled than before, hoping that witness protection wasn't slowly killing her lover's spirit.

She's glad to see that Alex's spirit is alive and well.

Now that Alex has said hello to everyone except her, the expectations mount, and the blonde turns reluctantly to her former lover. "Olivia," she says, and Olivia can't figure out what that tone means. It isn't really cold or unfriendly, and the look in her eyes isn't either, but it is guarded.

Olivia smiles, and decides to just go with the truth. "I'm so glad you're back, Alex."

"You seem to have been managing," she says, and her eyes travel over all of the detectives but Olivia knows it was mostly meant for her. Elliot shoots her a glance and Olivia ducks her head, not wanting to deal with her nosy partner.

"We may have managed, Cabot, but it sure was lacking," Munch replies, and she smiles at him.

Olivia finally puts a finger on something that has been niggling at the back of her thoughts since Alex walked in. "What's with the bodyguards?" she says.

Alex shifts a little uncomfortably. "It's nothing," she says, well aware that she is facing five people who tend to be very protective of her. "Just a precaution."

"And what would you need to be taking precautions against?" asks Cragen.

"Velez is dead. The bodyguards are just to make sure none of his lieutenants want vengeance," Alex divulges reluctantly.

"Aren't you supposed to stay in witness protection until they're sure it's safe?" Elliot asks.

Alex shrugs. "I couldn't. So they saddled me with these guys." She jerks her thumb over her shoulder, a movement entirely too unsophisticated for the old Alex, but somehow it looks right on her.

There is comfortable silence for a few minutes, then Alex settles herself down in Elliot's chair. "Well, I'm sure you have work to do. If you don't mind, I'll hang around for a bit."

Cragen glances over her shoulder and Alex follows his gaze. "Don't worry, they won't report to the Feds," she says. "Right, guys?" Alex's tone still has the forceful tenor that Olivia remembers best about her in court, and she smirks a little to herself when she notices that the younger of the two suits appears totally cowed. The older one is harder to read, but they both nod obediently.

The captain smiles then, and claps Alex gently on the shoulder. "Well, then, of course you're welcome," he says. Turning to the detectives, he puts his hands in his pockets and gets into work mode. "What have we got?"

Alex leaves around lunchtime for a meeting with her mother, and it isn't a moment too soon. Ten minutes after the doors close behind the blonde former ADA, Casey Novak is striding into the squad room. "We've got a problem."

Olivia and Elliot, the closest to where she is standing, look up. "What is it?" asks Elliot.

"Judge Brown is threatening to throw out the knife in the Sarcofa case."

Elliot's face twists in anger. "What!"

"That was a clean bust!" Olivia adds.

Casey isn't happy herself, and she just shakes her head. "I know, I know. But they're arguing that the warrant was signed two minutes after you busted open the door."

"So what do you need from us?" Elliot asks.

"For you to appear in chambers."

"When?" Olivia asks suspiciously. They appear in court all the time. If Casey thinks it's something they might be upset about, something must be going on.

The shoe drops. "Now."

"What? Casey, we've got an open rape/homicide and Munch and Fin are working a sexual assault. We're swamped."

"Like I'm not?" she replies a little snappily. "We've all got full plates. But I can't clear this unless you can testify that you called Fin after watching the Judge sign the warrant, and not before."

"This is bull!" Olivia exclaims. "There's no way we would be that sloppy, and the defense knows it."

"Of course they do. We've got Sarcofa dead, and they know it. It's a stalling technique. But that doesn't mean that we can just ignore it."

Elliot stands up and starts to pace, and Casey reaches over to touch Olivia's wrist gently, but she's in no mood to be calmed. "When?" she asks resignedly.

"As soon as you can get there," Casey says, straightening. "Judge gave us an hour to be there."

Elliot stops in front of the desk and nods. "Alright. Well, let's get going."

The ride to the courthouse is brief, but the wait for Judge Brown to finish whatever he was doing when they got there is much longer. Casey, never the picture of patience, glares at the door and paces, Elliot leans against the wall and affects a bored posture, and Olivia sits on the bench and stares at the ceiling.

Finally, they are called in and it takes the Judge all of six minutes and a few pithy remarks about their detective skills to decide that the knife is in. Casey breathes a silent sigh of relief, but Olivia, Elliot and the defense attorney are mostly just ticked off, for separate reasons. The afternoon mostly over by this point, Casey starts to walk them back to their car.

As they are nearing the door to the courthouse, Alex's voice rings out throughout the hall. "Detectives!"

Olivia and Elliot turn. Casey takes a breath before she joins them. "Alex. Hey."

"Casey." Alex's voice is a little cold, but mostly controlled. "Olivia, Elliot. Here on a case?"

"Just the defense trying to make our jobs harder," Casey says blandly.

"They like to do that." Alex's statement is equally void of emotion.

"Are you here checking up on old friends?" Olivia asks, and Alex nods.

"Amazingly enough, some of the judges actually liked me."

Olivia grins. "Now, I wonder how that happened."

"I wonder." Casey's face is blank and her tone is equally bland.

"Been having judge troubles lately?" Alex asks with the slightest undercurrent of …something.

Elliot is looking between the women, and understanding is beginning to dawn on his face at the tenor of their interactions. "Nice seeing you, Alex," he says. "See you later, Casey?"

The redhead nods, and Elliot, taking Olivia's arm, walks them quickly from the courthouse. As soon as they have cleared the walls, he lets go and turns to her, giving her an incredulous look. "Casey?"

Olivia plays dumb momentarily. "What?"

Elliot rolls his eyes. "Oh, don't give me that, Liv. I saw what was going on in there. Casey-frickin-Novak was your houseguest last night when Alex showed up?"

Sighing, Olivia gives up on playing dumb. "She was there. So what, Elliot?"

"So what? You never told me." He looks a little hurt, and Olivia looks away.

"I didn't think you would like it."

"Why?"

"Because you didn't like her very much."

Elliot's eyes narrow. "Wait. This is more than a one-night thing?"

Olivia focuses her eyes on the brick edges of a planter. "It's been a couple months now," she admits.

"And you're what? Dating? Friends with benefits?"

"Dating. Quietly."

Elliot scoffs. "I'll say. And you didn't think to tell me?"

"You had your own problems."

His masculine pride somewhat put aside, Elliot runs a hand over his hair and looks her in the eyes. "Wow. So I bet this is awkward as hell, huh?"

Relieved that he's done being mad at her, Olivia shrugs. "Not so much. Casey took it really well." She looks away. "She said she always thought we were only until Alex came back."

Elliot takes her hand and starts walking towards the car. "So, were you?"

"No! Well… I never really thought about it, Elliot. It was hard to think about Alex, and not knowing if she'd ever be home at all…"

He nods understandingly as he walks around to get into the driver's seat of their car. "So, what do you do now?"

Olivia lowers herself into the seat and sighs. "I wish I knew."


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