Stay With Me

- Goodbye, Love -

By: Lil' Amethyst Angel

Warnings: Slight swearing, shounen-ai, violence (weapons), and mentions of past abuse.

He had once read that 'nothing gold can stay'. That's true. Innocence will always be tainted, happiness always broken. He wasn't being pessimistic, just realistic.

Drake sighed for what seemed like the thousandth time that day. JJ had been acting oddly that morning. He wouldn't look Drake in the eye and he was avoiding him it seemed. Drake was worried he had done something wrong or maybe JJ was just having regrets about being with him. He wouldn't admit it, but he was feeling very insecure. The sandy-haired man lifted his head and looked through his bangs at his partner, who was sitting across from him, appearing deep in thought.

JJ hadn't noticed his lover's worried glances, or frowns, or constant sighs. He was drowning in his own problems. He had decided to meet with Sean today. He had to face his fears. He had to do this in order to move on. He couldn't really explain why. He didn't tell Drake or any of the others because he knew they would try to talk him out of it. They wouldn't, couldn't understand.


Drake sat, slumped in the break room, staring into nothingness. Movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention finally. Drake turned to see Dee leaning against the counter.

"What's up with you? You've been like that for a while. You didn't even notice me come in."

Drake frowned deeply. "JJ."

"Ah, of course. You guys in a fight?"

"No…as far as I know. He's been acting weird lately, but every time I ask him if something is wrong he just brushes it off or changes the subject. What if he's in some sort of trouble? What if he's just bored with me?" Drake mumbled, looking down.

"You're an overprotective worry-wart, y'know that?" Dee teased. Drake rolled his eyes. Dee stopped grinning, and sobered. "You're the best thing that has happened to JJ in a long time. He really cares about you."

Drake suddenly had a thought, but was reluctant to voice it. "The last time he was acting like this it was because…Do you think it has to do with Sean?"

Dee was caught off guard by the question. "No…" The answer sounded uncertain, even to Dee. Trying to lighten the tense atmosphere, Dee gave a nervous laugh, "JJ's over Sean, right?"


JJ stared up at his old apartment. He was sitting on chilled wooden bench across the street from the building that held so many memories…so much pain. What would happen if Sean asked him to go back? Would he? Flashes of Drake ran through his head.

Flashback

It had been two weeks since the two men had become a coupleJJ returned home late one night to smoke-filled apartment. He rushed to the kitchen only to find Drake, decked out I a sauce-covered apron, mumbling something about possessed stoves.

"What the hell happened?" JJ exclaimed.

"I was, uh, trying to make dinner for you, but it didn't exactly turn out." Drake said sheepishly. As if to stress this point a strange red substance began to bubble over the rim of the pot on the stove, emitting a hissing noise. Needless to say, they both ordered out that evening. Secretly, JJ thought Drake looked adorable, especially when blushing, and he appreciated that Drake would cook for him. The saying was true- it's the thought that counts.

End of Flashback

JJ chuckled slightly. He continued to think of his memories with Drake.

Flashback

The lights in the theatre gradually brightened as the movie's credits rolled.

"Those were some cool effects. What did you think of it?" Drake asked.

JJ cocked his head to the side, as he sometimes did, reminding Drake of a puppy. "Yeah, it was pretty good. But it was even better that I was here with you." JJ leaned over and pecked Drake on the lips.

A disgusted noise came from behind them. Drake turned to find two boys in their late teens. He distinctly heard one of them mutter, "Sick fags." Drake was furious, but before he could do anything, his partner ushered him out of the theatre, while giving the boys the finger on the way out. Once they were outside Drake angrily slammed his fist into a wall of a nearby building. It was dark and the streets weren't very busy.

"Calm down, Drake." JJ soothed.

"How can you be so calm? Doesn't shit like that bother you?"

The lavender-haired man sighed. "People like that just aren't worth it. They're closed-minded idiots and I'm not going to waste my time and effort with them."

Drake calmed slightly, breathing deeply. He smiled at his partner. JJ really did surprise him sometimes.

'Thanks for stopping me from attacking that ass, I probably would have beaten him to a pulp."

"You need to learn to control your temper." JJ admonished teasingly.

Drake pouted, then shot back, "I'm not the one who karate chopped Ted for trying to steal my doughnut."

End of Flashback

The young man smiled fondly at the memories. 'No, I would never go back to Sean. Now I know what it's like to be in a good relationship, without the abuse. I can finally accept that's what it was- abuse. And anyways, I love Drake…very much.' He thought to himself. Finally being able to draw enough courage, JJ stood and walked into the building, knowing that the confrontation he was about to face would change his life.


Drake was even more concerned after his conversation with Dee. He had to talk to JJ.

"Hey, Ted, have u seen JJ?" Drake called to his friend.

"Naw, I think he took off early."

Drake groaned. He was about to pack up his own belongings when he noticed JJ had left his laptop on his desk. Going over to shut it off, he noticed that a program had been left open. Clicking on the icon on the bottom tool bar, an e-mail popped up. It was a reply from Drake's stomach did a flip. He quickly skimmed the e-mail and almost dropped to the ground as his legs became weak. It read:

JJ,

Thanks for agreeing to meet with me. I can't wait to see you. I'll see you tonight at 8, I'm sure you can remember how to get there. I've missed you.

Sean

JJ, his JJ, was meeting with Sean! Drake's mind raced. This wasn't happening, not again. He ran to Dee and Ryo, bursting into the locker room where they were getting their things together to go home.

Drake's thoughts were unfocused as he immediately started babbling, "JJ went alone. Why would he lie to me about this? God, he could be in danger!"

Ryo rested a silencing hand on his friend's arm. "Calm down. What's wrong?"

"When I went to turn off JJ's laptop there was an e-mail from Sean up. They're meeting tonight." Drake rushed out, rather frantically. His fellow officers paled.

"We have to go after him!" Ryo exclaimed.

"Where are they meeting?" Dee asked at the same time.

"I'm not sure. I'm assuming at their old apartment. As far as I know Sean never sold it."

A silent agreement passed through the three and they all made their ways to their cars.


JJ stepped in front of the door that led to his destination. This door had always led to pain and blood and tears in the past. He knew it was silly to be scared of an apartment, but he couldn't help feel the chilling grip of fear just by standing in front of it. He was about to enter the place that not so long ago he was laying half dead on the blood-stained carpet in. JJ hesitantly knocked on the door. It swung open without delay, revealing his ex-lover standing there with a warm smile. That smile had always drawn him in, had given him false comfort and reassurance. JJ took a moment and just stared. He stared into the face of the man that had damaged him so- his lover, his destroyer, his addiction. He stared into unrevealing eyes. He stared into possibility. (2)

JJ wandered into the living room and took a seat on the couch unsurely. Sean followed him in and leaned against the wall opposite him.

"How have you been, JJ?" Sean asked politely. His voice, like his eyes, gave nothing away. They could never be called warm, but they were really cold either.

"Fine," was the terse reply. Silence reigned for a few moments. JJ decided to get the meeting over with and ask the question that had been plaguing him.

"Why did you do that to me?" The young man's voice was surprisingly steady. Though it was said softly, the question savagely slashed through the quiet. Sean, having anticipated the question, sighed exasperatedly.

"Oh, JJ, don't you get it yet? It's your fault." The statement was said easily and slowly, as if he was explaining it to a child.

JJ, for his part, was shocked. He managed to choke out a strangled, "What!"

"You were- are- weak. You were always messing up. You needed to be taught your place. I was doing it for your own good. I was only trying to help you become better. I loved you." JJ was frozen. He had heard this all before from the man in front of him, but Drake said it wasn't true…Drake said it wasn't!

"No!" JJ's cry tore through the apartment. Sean looked momentarily shocked. "It wasn't for my own good! Don't try to defend your perversions now! You used me! You didn't care about me at all; you just wanted someone who you could control, someone you could have power over. And I," JJ's voice broke, but he continued, "I let you! I let you hurt me, break me." JJ stopped and took a deep breath to calm himself. "No more. I won't let this happen again." Having said what he needed to, the young officer turned to leave. Sean's growl followed by a familiar metal clicking noise stopped him in his tracks. JJ whipped around to find Sean aiming a gun at his head.


Drake was the first to reach the apartment complex. He shakily got out of his car and ran into the building that held so many horrid memories, sprinting up the stairs. Soon two more sets of footsteps echoed behind him, signaling Dee and Ryo's arrival. Drake reached the desired floor and ripped it open, running down the hall, stopping only when he reached JJ's old home. Dee and Ryo were still quite a few flights below him, and he was too anxious to wait for their backup. The officer banged on the door fiercly, receiving no answer.


Sean's eyes darted to the hall which lead to the front door at the noise. He sent a ferocious glare at his former lover, making JJ shiver in remembrance of the pain that look had always brought in the past.

"You brought your fuck-toy with you? Well great, now you can die together." Sean grabbed JJ and pulled the man firmly against his chest, pointing the gun at the lavender-haired man's head, waiting for the front door to burst open.


Drake had had enough. He knew JJ was in that apartment. He couldn't explain why, but he just knew. He pulled out his gun and clicked off the safety. Refusing to wait any longer, Drake summoned his strength and with one brutal kick sent the door flying off its hinges. Rushing into the apartment, he cautiously stayed close to the wall, making his way to the living room. He held his gun carefully and remained alert. For a moment Drake wondered if he should put his gun away. He hated Sean. He hated him with a passion. He hated what that monster had done to his JJ. He wasn't sure if he could stop himself from shooting the man if he saw him again. The fleeting thought left his head as he peeked around the corner into the living room. His heart seemed to stop and the scene before him. Drake forgot to breathe for a moment and his blood ran cold. There was Sean, who was red in the face and breathing heavily- probably due to anger- pointing a gun to JJ's head. JJ stood rigidly still, his eyes wide. All sense left Drake when he saw his lover in danger and, aiming the gun at Sean, moved from behind the corner.

"Freeze! Drop the gun!" Drake bellowed. If he had been thinking clearly at the time, he would have realized what an incredibly foolish thing it was to do and that it could have had deadly consequences. Sean could have been so startled that he shot JJ. Luckily, he didn't. Sean did not lower the gun however.

Sean smirked sadistically. "Lower your gun, or I swear I'll kill him" Sean nudged the man in his arms. "You may shoot me, but he'll already be dead. Is it worth it, Drake?" Sean drew out the name lazily. "Put your gun down and I'll consider lowering mine."

Drake didn't know what to do. Should he risk it? He couldn't just shoot Sean, or he would risk hitting JJ. Cursing silently, the officer placed his gun on the floor and took a few steps away from it.

"Good boy." Sean turned his attention, then, to his former boyfriend. "It was really stupid of you to come, JJ. Some would think you have a death wish. Or maybe you just can't bear to be without me. It's too bad, if you had been more well-behaved today I may have taken you back."

JJ scowled and shot a disgusted look sideways at his captor. "Have you not heard a thing I've said? I don't want you! Never again will I put myself through that. And I…I love Drake now." JJ turned teary eyes to his lover, whom looked helplessly at him.

Seeing the exchange, Sean sneered, "He can't save you this time." The writer was not happy about JJ's little love confession. JJ was his, his possession. How dare he go after some other guy! He would show them. No one was going to betray him or make him look like a fool. Sean gritted his teeth and tightened his hold on the weapon. Refocusing his attention on Drake, Sean spoke, "Lucky you, you get to watch you lover die."

Drake's hands were balled into fists and it was taking ever ounce of control not to lunge at Sean. Sean saw this and leered at him. Then, turning back to JJ, Sean pulled him into a forceful kiss. Immediately after, Sean pushed him roughly away and had aimed the gun at JJ before Drake had time to move.

"Goodbye, love."

BANG!

To Be Continued

1) Yes, I know, it's not the most creative e-mail address…And the triple 6 does have a meaning- the Devil's number.

2) I was going to go more into what I meant by "possibility", but decided I'll leave this up for everyone to interpret in their own way.

Author's Note: So sorry for the long wait (I know some of you were ready to kill me). The next chapter will be the last (tear tear). Thanks everyone for the reviews! I apologize for any spelling/grammar mistakes, I was so excited to have finally finished, I posted it without going through it.

athana233- O.OUh, sorry for not updating fast enough. Thanks so much for the review (and hugs of course! lol). Don't worry, dramadiva was just teasing me, but thanks for standing up for my story. :)

kasumi sono ookami- Not the present-past tense mistakes, noooooo! Lol. Thanks for the kind review, I wanted to make the story as realistic as possible (so JJ and Drake didn't suddenly fall in love one day and pine away for the duration of the story; I tried to make it gradual).

NeekerBreeker- I saw your review for the FAKE fic, "Goodbye". I just wanted to thank you for standing up for my story.