chapter 4!
Becca- I am not in denial! I DO NOT like Sirius like that! I mean come on, he's James's best mate. And he has a new girl friend every other week for heaven's sake! I think he's going for a record or something. He wants to have a plaque made for him that says "Sirius Black, Womanizer", awarded for having dated every female to ever enter Hogwarts. Then he can have it hung in the trophy room and be a hero to all future pricks that think they're the best thing to grace this planet. I bet he's even taken McGonagall on a date before. I think I'll ask him too, I can just picture it. "Soo Black, how'd you're date with McGonagall go last night?" ewe! Bad mental images! How can you think I'd like such a gitt! Ugg. And you call yourself a sister! For the love of Merlin, I remember when we were like 4 and he ran around the house starkers! But anyway- James is doing great. Lily is doing as well as can be expected-seeing as its November 7th. And that other person I'm not going to mention (I sooo do not like him!) is also doing well. But I swear he's going mad. No. Scratch that. He IS mad. He started this club last week called Skrewt Lovers Anonymous. You should have seen all the girls that showed up. (And no. I WAS NOT one of them!) They were all crowded around him, hanging on to his every word. Some were even taking notes! For the sake of all evil monkeys, why would anyone start a club devoted to BLAST ENDED SKREWTS? Okay well Hagrid might (seeing as he's the one that bred them)but then Hagrid's never been all there when it comes to dangerous creatures! My point IS why would anyone in their right mind start a club devoted to Blast Ended Skrewts? Anyways, Remus is also good and so is everyone else. It's starting to irk me how Lily and James are always flirting and acting all lovey dovey and don't even relies it. I really need to do something about them. Its quiet obvious that they like each other. Hell, they've liked each other since 4th year! Any suggestions on how to get them together? It's really annoying listening to Lily talk about him or mention him all the time. "You won't believe what James did today!" "James told me…" "James has this weird theory…" "James and I did that once!" it's sickening really. And I think all of us would be much happier if they just quit all the talk and find a broom closet somewhere. Well, I should probably go. I have to finish an essay that's due tomorrow. 5 rolls of parchment! (Explain all the uses for gillyweed. I swear, who doesn't know all the uses for gillyweed? Sprout might not have assigned it to us though if Sirius and James hadn't started eating it and conjuring fish bowls full of water to stick their heads in. really; they act like 5 year olds sometimes! I can't wait to get married and change my name to something like Collins so no one can associate me with him.) Say hi to mum and dad for me.
Lots of love,
You're not in love with Sirius Black, sister
Rachel sealed the letter and sent it off with her snowy owl Luvenia, muttering under her breath about crazy family members. She took out some parchment and settled down on her bed. Had she not turned on the WWN she would have heard a loud thump come from somewhere in the wall behind the mirror.
Previously(like on TV lol):
Lily let out a small squeal and James inhaled sharply. Lily was gripping James' shoulders so hard that she was probably leaving crescent marks in his skin. She was afraid that if she let go of James she would go spinning of into nothingness. So she pulled herself closer to him; if that was even possible. A couple seconds later they landed hard in what seemed to be . . . another closet?
Lily and James landed with a thump in a small, dark, musty room that seemed to be some sort of closet. Lily was thoroughly confused by this, as they had just been in a different closet 3 seconds before.
"James. Where the heck are we?" Lily said, a note of annoyance in her voice.
"Don't sweat it Lil. We're just outside your dorm. See look behind you." Lily turned around, and while expecting to see a door that led to the hall way, but all she saw was a long window that looked into her dorm room. But that wasn't possible. There wasn't a window at this angle of the room. She could see the window from this angle!
"Jaaammmmeeesssss." Lily said slowly and drawn out. "What exactly is going on here?" James knew that tone, and knew it darn well. Even though he was a lot taller than she was, she seemed to be a million feet tall. when she used that tone. So he very quickly explained to her where they were.
"Well you see Lils; this here window is not actually a window. Have you ever heard of a one way mirror?" Lily let out a noise that sounded curiously like a growl. "Ok. You have. Well, did you notice that we are positioned right behind you're mirror? You're mirror is actual a one way mirror. It looks like a mirror from the other side, but people on this side you can see out through it like a window. Savvy?"
"Yes, I understand, but how could we have not noticed it before? I mean, we've lived here for that last 5 ½ years!"
"You wouldn't have noticed it, unless you tried to take it from the wall and then you would have discovered the opening."
"Hmm" Lily said thoughtfully. "How do we get out then Mr. smarty-pants?" she said with a playful look.
"At a certain time each day, a door appears on that wall. The passage leads to ride outside the kitchens. Don't ask me how though."
"What time does it appear then?"
"Uhh………12:00 midnight."
"James! You mean we have to wait for…."she looked at her watch "……4 ½ hours! Are you crazy! We have an essay due for Sprout tomorrow! And I still have 3 pages to write! At least in the library we could have done something! In here all we can do is sit!"
"Who said there's nothing to do?" He said with a devious grin on his face. She slowly turned to face him.
"Wait a minute...just how long have you known about this little passage thingy?" James quickly realized he had just dug himself into a big hole. He gulped audibly. "Umm….about 3rd year."
"And you come here often? Do you? Come to peep in on us?"
"No! We discovered it by accident! And we've only been 3 or 4 times!"
"Oh really?"
"Well, maybe a little more then 5 times, but we haven't been in here since the middle of 4th year; I swear!"
"Alright, I'll let you off...this time, but this won't be the end of it!" She sat down and leaned against one of the walls. James sighed with relief. He'd thought for sure that she'd hex him. If she found out about some of the things we've seen, she probably would. But he shook himself, trying to stop thinking about…..that.
"So, how'd you discover this? No doubt there's an interesting story behind it." Lily grinned up at him as he sat down next to her.
"Well, Sirius and I were planting some dung bombs in Ms. Pince's desk when Peter came to warn us that she was coming back from lunch. We could have gotten away sooner, if we hadn't started arguing about who had to carry the dung bombs back; you know they smell even before they're set off." Lily nodded and laughed, encouraging him to continue. "Well, before we knew it she was headed straight for her desk. We froze immediately. Luckily, she was reading a book and was so engrossed in it that she didn't even notice us! So when she looked away for a second, we dove into her closet. She stayed there all day so we couldn't get away without her seeing us. You know she gives the worst detentions of all the teachers. Well, we'd fallen asleep against the back wall. Peter was the 1st one to be transported. You should have seen him when I got there. He had nearly wet himself! He was huddled in the corner whimpering and shaking. Then Sirius appeared and landed right on top of me! It was quit confusing the first couple minutes. Peter was shrieking and I was yelling at Sirius to get off me, while Sirius was shouting at me that he couldn't move! I ended up having to untangle myself as Sirius had gotten 'beaten up' by the tunnel!"
By this time James was gasping for air and Lily was rolling on the floor laughing. " Turns out Sirius had been so freaked out by waking up in a swirling tunnel, he had started flailing and was covered in scrapes and bruises! It was so hilarious."
Lily and James spent the next 3 hours reliving memories of their childhood, and years at Hogwarts. Around eleven there was a lull in the conversation, but neither of them minded. They sat comfortably in each other's company; thinking their own thoughts.
After some time Lily sighed deeply and leaned her head on James' shoulder, letting a single silent tear slide down her cheek. James immediately noticed and pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her. She turned her head and cried into his shoulder. He knew that this would come eventually, and now that it had there was nothing he could do. She would talk when she wanted to.
A couple minutes later Lily pulled away from him slightly, yet remained in his arms. She drew a shaky breath and whispered "Do you know what today is, James? "Of course I do Lils, how could I forget?"
"Do you realize that it's been 4 years? It's been 4 years!"
She curled up and cried into his chest as another wave of tears over took her). They sat there together for sometime, before either of them spoke. "I just miss her so much. Sometimes I dream about us together, listening to music and talking and goofing around. I keep thinking that if I had been! There to protect her she would….she would still be here." James pulled back and looked her in the eye.
"Don't think like that Lily. There's nothing you could've done, if you had been there you'd be dead too. If I lost you,...I don't know what I would have done." He pulled her even closer and held her tight.
"I guess you're right. Sometimes I still think of what we would be doing if she hadn't been murdered. There's just too many 'what if's'. What if I had been there too? What if both of us had died? Or what if I had been there instead of her?" "We can't dwell on those things Lil, or else we'd go mad." He whispered comfortingly in her ear.
"But she was my sister,damn it! She was my bloody sister!" Lily banged her already hurt fist on the stone floor, making it sting even more. She began sobbing again into James shirt, his arms wrapped comfortingly around her. "And do you know what makes me feel even worse about the whole thing?" Lily whispered. "I wish that it had been Petunia James. I wish it so badly. I wish that Petunia had died instead of Iris."
After a while Lily got over her emotional crash and closed her eyes, leaning her head on James shoulder. (She was now sitting beside him.) He had an arm around her waist and was leaning his head on top of hers. Even under the circumstances, James couldn't imagine being anywhere but there, and felt privileged that he was the one that got to wipe away her tears and get her through this.
"I'm sorry. You must think me horrible now." Lily sniffed. James wasn't used to seeing her like this-she very rarely showed this kind of emotion (the crying anyway). But he loved her more for it.
"Of course not Lils. You have every right to feel like that." Lily sighed and looked up at James, her amazing emerald eyes glimmering with strong emotion. "Thank you James; for always being there for me."
Now there faces were only inches apart. Lily could feel his breath on her face. she had wanted this for so long, but something went off in her mind. Something that was close to a big flashing sign that screamed 'WARNING! WARNING!'
James' heart caught in his throat as Lily pulled away.
"I'm sorry Lily." His voice came out horse "I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't be taking advantage-" Lily cut him off.
"You weren't taking advantage of me James."
"Well, then I shouldn't have assumed that you….that you wanted to…kiss me." He barley whispered the last 2 words. He was sure that those words would permanently damage whatever he had ever had with lily. He could just see their relationship tumbling over I gigantic cliff. What a stupid thing to say! He thought. And he had defiantly thought a lot about this. Probably more than he should have. This is not how this is supposed to happen!
Lily's head was spinning in circles. WHY could I have not just kissed him! She thought. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!
Finally the 'closet' door opened and they were able to escape from their cage. After the 'kissing incident' as they were both secretly referring to it, little was said between them. Since they missed dinner, they headed to the kitchens together. While waiting for their food, James attempted to make small talk. "So…. My mom sent me a letter this morning. She said to tell you hi, and that if you overwork yourself like you tend to do, she'll personally come up here and bash your head in. But you don't have to worry about her bashing your head in, because she won't get the chance if I get to you first." They both laughed. Ok. So far so good. He thought. Just keep her smiling.
Lily lay in bed that morning (as it was already 3:00a.m.) and mentally kicked herself. The whole evening had gone REALLY horribly. Except for the first part, in the library; that had been quite good. It had actually been quite excellent until they had almost kissed, almost being the key word. During the last hour she had actually considered that she might like him. No, she realized that she REALLY liked him. But now that the moment was gone all she could think about was how stupid she was to have thought that she had WANTED to kiss him. I mean, come on. He was like her best friend! So, as she drifted off to sleep she decided that the best thing would be just to forget the whole 'kissing incident' because she was sure that James had done just that.
