Author's Note: I would like to thank wooster from jeevesandwooster for the help! I warn you all, this is my first House MD fanfic so…yeah. Have fun.
Chapter 1: Oh, shut up and pop a Vicodin!
Gregory House walked into the hospital tiredly, as usual. He looked at Cuddy angrily. She merely rolled her eyes and smiled knowingly.
"What?" House snapped. "What are you smiling about?"
"No reason," smirked Cuddy, showing him the file on his following patient. "It's a kid—I think he got something up his nose."
"Ugh. You're too happy—you do know it's way too early, right?" House snapped, snatching it from her hands.
"And you're too much of a jerk—but you know that, right?"
Cuddy watched him go, sighing. Why did he always feel the need to dump clinic hours? He did nothing else anyway.
Suddenly, his image began to blur. She felt herself go woozy. She covered her head with her hands and took deep breaths. She grimaced, hoping it would go away like it did before…
Cuddy tried to remember what had happened last night to explain this feeling. She remembered going somewhere….with….with….someone….
What was WRONG with her…?
She struggled her way to her office. On her way, she passed Dr. Chase, one of Dr. House's ducklings. She paused, and felt her body turn toward the receding figure of House.
"Uhh, Dr. Cuddy? Are you okay?" He gave her a worried look. "You look really tired…do you need any—"
He stopped, staring at the woman.
Cuddy had begun to sing, and dance, and all this to the tune of "All That Jazz", no less….
"C'mon
House
Go do your clinic hours
And get off my back!
Y'know the patients here
Could use your diagnostic powers
So get off my back!
You know that you
Have to do it my way,
So quit your bickering
And just do what I say
I don't care what you want,
So don't make a crack,
And get off
My
Baaaaackkkk...!"
House ran over as Dr. Chase caught Cuddy mid-fall.
"What the hell—" Cuddy started, breathing hard.
"You're having some sort of seizure. Or... a delusion of some kind," he said, popping a Vicodin into Cuddy's mouth, which she promptly spit back at him.
"Hey!"
"I am strong—And I don't need no Vicodin--" She stopped, gasping. "Love—is—a—Battle—" Cuddy paused, looking alarmed. "Holy Shiiii—"
"Just don't start doing anything Michael Jackson." House quickly stabbed her with a syringe and she went limp.
"What did you do to her!" Dr. Chase asked. House rolled his eyes.
"I gave her a tranquilizer, you idiot. What, does it feel weird holding a woman? Your first time and all, is it?" House smirked inwardly as Dr. Chase blanched and continued. "Anyway, it'll only last a few minutes, so put her in quarantine before she lapses into Spongebob Squarepants."
"Why? Don't you know what's wrong with her?" Dr. Chase saw House stare at Cuddy's limp body critically.
"She's either incredibly drunk—which I find highly unlikely—or she's acquired the random tendency to burst into song." House muttered darkly, "Hopefully she hasn't watched any Bollywood films recently…."
"What?"
"I'm not sure what she has." House snapped and started limping away, not looking at Dr. Chase. "Meet me with the other ducklings in Meeting Room A."
"But where's the quar—"
"Turn right."
Dr. Chase looked right, and saw a door with "Quarantine" on the door. "Uh, ok. C'mon, Dr. Cuddy…" He grunted and lifted her so that his hands were under her thighs and back (princess-style!), and took her to the room.
End Author's Note: Well, did everyone enjoy their first dose of my musical? Review please!
