ZE DELETED SCENE!
In Phantom's lairPhantom: No one would listen…no one but her… and the annoying little chipmunk that gnaws on my toes when I sleep…what's the difference?
Stares at drawings of ChristinePhantom: Sob. This is almost frightening.
Chipmunk: Dude, it is frightening. Get a hobby.
Phantom thwacks chipmunk with statueSad home audiences in 2004: This is good. Why wasn't this in the movie?
Assmunch: because there are no Jedis in it!
Authoress smacks him again
Authoress: Shut up and watch the movie or I'll give you something to complain about.
Phantom: I miss her, Chippy. What should I do?
Chipmunk: Wanna get hammered?
Phantom: NO. Last time we did that, you ralphed all over my lair.
Phantom and chipmunk sigh in unisonChipmunk: When's that chick gonna bring that quiche? I'm tired of eating your nasty lemon bars.
Phantom: Fine. I slave over a hot stove all day just so I can be griped at. I must be the joke of the universe. Throws lemon bars in water.
A steaming quiche appears by the portcullis
Phantom: It's Christine!
Chipmunk: It's quiche!
Phantom: Hey there's a note.
Note: To phantom: this restraining order comes fondly. Don't bug me again. ♥ Christine.
Phantom: Now I realize how irksome it is to get notes.
Phantom throws quiche downPhantom: I think I want to get hammered now.
Chipmunk: You see, Erik. That's why I'm your friend!
Phantom: You're not my friend. You're vermin.
Chipmunk: Just VERMIN? How dare you. I'm the mastermind of this duo and you know it!
Phantom: Whatever. Just give me that vodka.
Fin. At last.