Title: Brooding
Chapter: 4 of ? of Watching.
Author: Jen
Disclaimer: I don't own PR, Disney does. I do own Jordan however, so no take, no trouble.
Author's Notes: I apologize for the delay. I had Chapters 4 and 5 written a long time ago and they were promptly lost when my computer crashed. So I had to work this from memory and ended up going in another direction with it. Anyway, I finally got to where I felt was a decent stopping place, even though the chapter ended up being pretty short. Enjoy, and as always, feel free to comment. the real vampire: Thanks for pointing that error out to me
Man, I am such a fool. How could I have ever thought that Jordan would wait for me to get up the nerve to ask her out? That no one else would ever see the things in her that I did? The things that made her special? It was only a matter of time before someone else took the chance I was too chicken to take and now all I could do was kick myself for it.
What was worse, it was one of my own best buds that did it. True, they hadn't even gone out on the date yet, but Hunter could turn on the charm when he really wanted to. The dude may be dark and brooding most of the time, but when he felt like it he could be a great guy. Jordan may act tough and hard-to-impress, but I knew it was only because she wasn't accustomed to people looking out for her. Deep down, she loved it when I forced her to stop working so damned much and enjoy life for a change, not that she would ever tell me that--not in words anyway.
And Hunter was very good at taking care of people from looking out for Blake for all of these years. Dude probably wouldn't get it right the first time, but Jordan wouldn't hold that against him. Man was I screwed. I couldn't say anything now. It so wouldn't be cool. Buds don't go after bud's girlfriend dude, it just wasn't right. Besides, if I tried to stop this, would never forgive me. She already suspected that I didn't think she deserved a love life like everyone else. I wasn't about to ruin a really great friendship over jealousy. No way.
This was going to be fun though. With my luck they'd hit it off great and end up getting married or something and have a whole brood of kids. Yeah, I know, melodramatic, thy name is Dustin. So sue me. The girl I loved in secret was interested in a close friend of mine. I was entitled to a little irrationality. So there.
"You okay over there?"
I grunted. I don't wanna talk to you. Go away. I just wanna sit and feel sorry for myself for awhile. But, no one ever accused blond and broody of being perceptive.
"Dustin?"
"What?" I asked in annoyance.
"You okay man?"
"Why?"
"I dunno. I just don't think I've ever heard you be this quiet."
"Yeah well, Energizer bunny I'm not."
Hunter raised his hands in defense. "Okay bro. Just wondering."
I tried to hide it, but a snort slipped out. Yeah, I wasn't in a real friendly mood with King Broody himself. Bite me. I felt him eye me for a long time before the tense silence was broken again.
"Dude, you mad at me for something?"
Thank you, Captain Obvious. I debated for a long time whether or not he deserved an honest answer. Level with him or let him wonder? But my tongue got the better of me.
"What are you doing?"
Hunter had apparently given up on getting an answer to his question, because he looked up in surprise. "With what?"
"Jordan." I said plainly.
He raised an eyebrow. "She told you about that?"
"Come off it Hunter. We all saw you flirting with her last night." I pointed out, avoiding the question.
"Is that what this is about? That I asked Jordan out?"
"I just don't want to see her get hurt. You aren't known for your long attention span when it comes to girls Hunter."
"Yeah bro, but Jordan isn't just any girl. You really think I'd screw over half the team that keeps our asses out of the fire? She'd probably put live scorpions in the Insectizord's pilot seat."
I didn't laugh. "She was there for me so I'm going to be there for her. Don't screw around with this Hunter."
Hunter put down the part he was working on to give me his full attention, looking serious. "I don't want to see her hurt any more than you do Dustin. I like her. I like her a lot."
"Since when?" I pressed quietly.
"Always. I've just never really had a chance to talk to her you know? She never does anything with us outside Ops and I didn't want to make her mad at me for interrupting her when she's working. I saw a chance last night and I grabbed it. Are you cool with that?"
Yeah right. But I had no choice. I turned back to my work, dismissing the matter. "I'm cool as long as she's happy."
I felt him watch me for a few seconds, as if debating whether or not to push further. Risk was his middle name. "You don't like her like that do you?"
I froze, then forced myself to keep working. "Does it matter?" I retorted quietly, avoiding the question.
"Yeah, it matters. I'm not gonna give up a chance to find out what can be, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have a fair shot too."
Damn it, he was too honorable for his own good. "Why bother? I mean, why would she agree to go out with you if she liked me?"
"You never know dude, you might be surprised. I mean, all of us thought you were hung up on Marah. Maybe she thinks so too."
"Yeah okay, that doesn't change the fact that you're the one she's going out with." I muttered.
"I asked her for a chance. It could be just that, a chance. She might not feel the same way. I know that. But I have to see that for myself. Otherwise I'll always wonder what could be. You do what you have to do man. Just consider this: do you really want to regret not finding out or worse, find out someday that you could have had a chance with her?"
I didn't answer him, but damn if his words weren't working on me. He might have a point. I was already kicking myself for thinking it wouldn't ever be too late. How would I feel if I finally got the guts to tell her how I felt and she told me that if I had only told her sooner we could have both been happy? But what if she did like Hunter? Just because she let him make the first move didn't mean that she didn't want him to.
It wasn't the first time Jordan had been asked out--the few times she ventured out of Ops to hang with us here she was a regular distraction for the dudes that stopped in. But she always turned them down. Did she say yes to Hunter out of friendship or did she really want to go out with him? And if she did accept as a friend, what would stop her from doing the same to me? Regretting not asking might hurt man, but having her accept out of courtesy would hurt a hell of a lot more.
I growled under my breath and flung my rag into the barrel. Either way I was screwed. Why did my life have to be so complicated?
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Next Chapter: The date
Sorry for the short chapter, but I've been trying to get this out for ages after having my last version of it and Chapter Five wiped out on another computer. Well, Dustin is having his share of regrets, but will they be enough to spur him into action before it's too late?
