Title: How Hermione Granger Became Insane

Disclaimer: ...I can almost hear the copyright people knocking at my door. So I suppose I shall say... Harry Potter does not belong to me! Bummer!

Rating: M

Summary: "…the explanation of why I am in the Head's common room, backing Draco Malfoy up against a bookcase." DMHG


Chapter two: In which Draco can't finish his transfiguration essay

"But Dracooo! Why do we have to go to the library!"

"I never said you could go." he spat.

He had tried to venture into the library, knowing it was one place Pansy abhorred and would maybe refuse to follow him in.

Unfortunately the gods must have hated him that day because she followed him in anyway.

This girl was driving him mad! The squealing, the hollering, that little- Calm down. Remember, chivalry.

He scowled menacingly at Pansy, which proved to no avail as the girl latched onto his waist, almost being dragged as he tried to walk rapidly away from the girl.

"You annoyingly mad wench! Let go of me you undeserving brat." he menaced loudly receiving stares and glares from a few students happening to hear his harsh words which interrupted them from their work.

"Draco Malfoy! You and Parkinson shush this instant or I will make you two stay after and catalogue stray books in the right order!" Madame Pince whispered to them, screechily.

He winced but shoved Pansy off him anyways.

He did what any desperate teenage-boy would do in that situation…

…He ran.

He ran like mad!

"DRACO!" Pansy squealed after him.

'Where to go? Where to go!' Draco thought as he ran past bookcases and studying students. Finally, after almost being backed into a corner by Pansy, 'Unlikely, I know. I'd have thought my stupendous Quidditch skills would've outrun her already.' I managed to duck her leap towards me and through the bookcases once again to finally exit the library.

I could her Pansy's loud obnoxious moan and the students and Madame Pince sighing gratefully just before returning to work as I left the library.

That girl, no, she wasn't fit to be called a girl, that banshee, was flaming crazy! Surely I have made a mistake in snogging her once. Yes, that's right, I admit to making a mistake. I, Draco Malfoy, admit to making the mistake of snogging Pansy Parkinson. And I have learned a lesson to never take advantage of an eager and willing girl such as Pansy Parkinson, ever again.

Ugh, Merlin only knows what she thinks now!

'I only snogged her once, 3 years ago after the Yule Ball, and now she acts as if we're in love. Love? Ha. Hilarious. Love. With that... that, thing. Ha! I don't think so.'

The most horrible thing about it was she never let him go. No matter how much he spit words of disgust in her way, she never lets go. It's pathetic, really. A stranger from afar could see it. He could almost pity her in a way.

Almost.

It wasn't as if he loathed her. He just... didn't like her very much at all. Sure she was a pretty thing once in a while when her nose wasn't so pig-shaped and her eyebrows were at least plucked in the middle. She strutted too much like a cheap whore, she fawned over every man she thought she could corrupt, and was nauseating in any way possible.

Sure he was seventeen, he was young. Boys his age were supposed to play around with girls like her, in his case it was expected to lip-lock with pure-blood Pansy. But...

...She was a nut-case! She was mental, that woman!

And boy was he running as fast as ever, making sure he was out of her sight!

Maybe running a little too fast as he harshly shoved a fellow slytherin in the arm.

"What the-"

"Watch where you're going, Blaise!" He growled at him, stopping. He knew he had been far enough from Pansy that she probably would've given up by then.

Scoffing, the other slytherin replied nonchalantly, "Malfoy, Malfoy, where could he be heading to in such a hurry? Is he caught up in an affair the Hogwarts student body hasn't heard rumors of yet?" turning to Draco he continued, "You know Hogwarts will know sooner or later who this person is you're in such a hurry to snog?"

Smirking, Draco replied. "As much as you think you've got this in the bag, Zabini, you're wrong yet again." Walking away he said, "Pansy's being a piss in the pants again."

Blaise laughed mockingly at Draco and follwed him, walking beside him.

It was hard to tell their relationship. The two boys had been friends, (if that was what you called their relationship) since they were young. Their fathers met quite often, most likely discussing death-eater business of course. Since then, they had been, err, friends. The both of them always got on each other's nerves, always argued and disagreed, and always taunting each other. Whatever their friendship was, it was an odd one indeed.

"That's pretty tough. Pansy's been off her rocker lately, hasn't she?"

Draco scoffed at him, "Are you just noticing that now? That is one crazy tart, I say."

"She's not that bad. There are some worse ones out there, you know."

Scowling he replied, "I suppose you're right, there."

Nodding, Blaise continued, "There's Eloise Midgen the plumpy-pimple lady, Millicent Bulstrode the man-in-disguise, and," he smirked, "Mudblood Granger."

At this they both laughed.

After running out of breath, Draco got to the point of being able to breathe correctly as he said, "You're right there, mate. No one's worse than Granger." He said with a fake shudder.

Blaise chuckled, "But you know..." he started, but saw Draco's raised eyebrow and said, "nevermind. Let's change the subject."

Draco raised his eyebrow even higher, "No, I don't think so, Zabini. What were you going to say?"

He shook his head and nervously said, "Nothing, it's nothing." He tried to say it as nonchalantly as possible, but it sounded like a little kid telling a lie more than anything.

"Spit it out, Blaise." Draco said forcefully.

Blaise noticed Draco's stony, unchanging face and sighed annoyingly.

"Fine." he said bitterly.

A few seconds passed with no words between them. Looking at him, Draco asked, "Well? Blast-ended skrewt got your tongue?"

"Alright, alright! I was just going to say... mudbloodisn'tlookingsobadnowadays."

Draco stared at him, a confused expression on his face.

"...Care to repeat that, Zabini?"

Blaise grunted and repeated his words slowly, "I said, the mudblood isn't looking so bad nowadays." He turned his head away from Draco's bewildered and disgusted face.

"What are you on about, Zabini! Are you talking about the same mudblood I'm talking about? I can't believe you fancy Granger!" Draco said in a fast and repulsed fashion.

To Draco's surprise, Blaise shrugged and said evenly, "I don't fancy the mudblood. I'm just saying she doesn't look as bad she used to. You have to admit yourself," at this Draco scoffed, Blaise ignored it and continued, "she's not the beaver with moss for hair, anymore."

Draco cracked a mad smile at him, at which soon became a full on evil/crazy laugh. 'He's going mad.' Blaise thought.

"Something I miss?" He asked the still laughing Draco.

Inbetween laughs the blonde replied, "I can't-haha-believe you think mud-haha-blood is decent looking!" He laughed for just a little more as he finished it off through small gasps of air.

Draco expected maybe a "I don't think she's decent looking! She's hideous!" or even a "Are you mad! Forget about it! Mudblood is dirt for all I care." but instead was shocked to hear Blaise's reply.

"So? She may not be gorgeous but she is quite decent looking. And even then," he chuckled a bit at this, "it's always the bookworm types that are the freakiest, if you know what I mean."

Disgusted, Draco waved him off. "Get your foolish behaviour away from me."

"Whatever, Malfoy." He left Draco at the portrait of an old actor as he strutted off.

'Most likely to go snog and comfort Pansy.' Draco thought disgustedly.

"Password?" The actor in the painting called out to Draco who was staring off in space.

"Hic habitat felicitas." he answered. Once he entered the common room he rolled his eyes. 'Dumbledore, that crazy old fool should pick better passwords.'

He fully knew that 'Hic habitat felicitas' meant 'Here lives happiness' in Latin.

He scoffed knowing it was far from that.

'Happiness? Here? With Granger?'

Draco shook his head. He was allowing his mind to think about her too much. He had to put an end to it. "That mudblood is invading my thoughts!" he growled lowly to himself.

He violently plopped onto the soft sofa letting the heat of the fireplace a few feet from him warm him. He sighed.

He mentally checked off things he did that day, 'Turn in potions assignment, knock frog-legs into Longbottom's potion, taunt Potter, manage to outrun from Parkinson, ignore Blaise's foolish ideas, finish Transfiguration essay that's due tomorrow.'

"Pig-swallow!" He croaked out. 'I forgot the transfiguration assignment due tomorrow!'

That was far unlike him! Normally he would've finished it a couple days after the paper was assigned but he forgot to do it. He hurriedly gathered some parchment and a quill nearby and brought them to his desk to the side of the common room.

He sat in the chair, quill in hand, he wrote:

The transfiguration of marine animals to land animals relies on-

And that was where he stopped.

Why was his mind blank all of a sudden!

Growling, he pulled himself out of the chair and headed to the book case to the side of the room.

He could have sworn he heard a chorus of loud, girly giggles come from Hermione's room but shrugged it off.

Draco was relieved the first day he entered his common room that a few bookcases occupied the side of the common room containing books he and Hermione might have needed for their studies. Being Head was a tiring job already, and having to go all the way to the library for a needed book was asking for a little too much. He felt gratified, knowing he had a miniature library in his own common room.

Standing in front and staring at the bookcase, he flipped through some books searching for a certain one which might have helped him in his transfiguration essay.

He heard a door creak open and shut quickly.

'Probably just Granger.' He thought, still intently searching for a book.

He heard a few steps, soft but distinct, come his way. He chose to ignore it, thinking she was just going to exit the common room. He tried so hard to keep his eyes from straying away from the book case to the girl who was slowly coming his way.

Through the corner of his eye he could see Hermione's slim figure strutting to him in a short, sheer, nightgown that stopped above her knees.

Wait.

Was he thinking correctly?

Hermione Granger...strutting towards him, IN AN IMMODEST NIGHTGOWN!

He resisted the urge of running around, screaming madly about how the world was coming to an end. First of all, Hermione Granger did not strut. Second of all she just did not wear flashy, showy gowns like that. Or atleast that's what he had thought.

He was able to observe her more as she came next to him, laying a hand lazily at the bookcase, at which he couldn't help but turn his whole head at her. His eyebrow immediately shot up.

He tried his best to put on his best 'I'm better than you, what do you think you are doing breathing my air?' face. It barely succeeded because all he could stare at was her.

Her hair wasn't the pile of overgrown moss as he had thought he had seen back, years ago. It was decent. More than decent, actually, it was... nice. With the large, chocolate curls framing her face. But Draco would never admit to that. Of course he wouldn't. Actually he wasn't even thinking that right now...

Because Draco was too busy staring at Hermione's face.

'Whoever put makeup on her had done a miracle.' He thought, but waved it off. He knew that truthfully she looked like what she had always looked like any other day. But today he only realized it more as he could glance at her up and down and realize he had to take Blaise's word that she was 'decent-looking'.

Maybe even more.

'NO NO NO!' He shoved off that last thought, disgusted at himself for thinking that.

"Mudblood, what in Merlin's name are you-" He found his mouth shut as she stepped closer to him. If that was even possible, as she was already inches from him. He felt the spine on his back meet in alignment with the bookcase.

'Is-is that a smirk?' He could have almost seen that same exact smirk on a familiar face. Oh yeah. It had only been worn many times before on his face.

"Shh..."

I could've almost screamed at her and thrash about, telling her not to touch me ever again.

She DARED lay a hand on my chest! Her. The Mudblood. Ugh!

The most shocking thing at that moment wasn't the fact that she was doing it, but that he, himself, wasn't doing anything about it!

'Oh Merlin.' He gravely thought as he felt her trace circles on his chest.

'What is she trying to do? Seduce me!' he thought obliviously.

It wasn't until he finally felt the whole of her body push against him that he felt a part of him jerk inside to her touch. Her feel... it was like their body's merged to fit perfectly beside each other.

He felt her breasts push up to his chest. Thinking, 'Never again will I think Granger was flat as a pancake!'

Suddenly she tiptoed so her height was met with his and their eyes met once more.

A feeling inside of him felt so alive. He just wanted to push her away but found himself not doing so as a feeling of, dare he think it, lust took over. Just as he was about to maybe let out a sound, any sound, he felt her move her soft cheek to his own. She was... nuzzling his cheek.

He felt a tingling sensation as he felt her arms snake up his shoulders and soon carressing his hair, his head. He never dared touch her before, of all the six, now almost seven years of knowing her. And now she was feeling him more than he thought he would ever experience with her. Ever.

He felt the warm feeling of her cheek leave his as she cut the motion short and moved her lips to his right ear and...

'Was... did she just...? Did mudblood just growl at me!'

Of course she had done so in the past. Many times, actually. When she was annoyed at his little taunts. Oh but this one was way different. It was the type of growl a lover would make to another in the throws of passion or seduction.

But soon, he didn't care that she had been releasing him at that moment. Or even that she was almost in a fit of giggles leaving the common room. He was concerned about that whole event.

Meeting with silence and the own ticking of the grandfather clock at the corner of the room, he said loudly and with as much emotion he could muster, "What in Merlin's name was that!".

He could laugh. He could yell. He could faint. He could throw things.

But he settled with shaking his head, turning around to finally find the transfiguration book he was looking for and heading over to the desk with the book in his hand. He flipped to the first few pages, finding himself reading the same line over and over. He stared blankly at the pages, the former event still clearly fresh in his mind.

He glared at the book, slamming it shut.

"Damn you, Granger."

Odds were he wasn't going to finish his essay that night.


A/N: I am fully aware that in the first chapter, in the beginning it says that Hermione shared a room with Parvati and Lavender. Uhh... heheh. Whoops? Sorry about that. Just pretend she was in there because they said they needed help on their homework. She really shares a Head's common room with Draco. Don't worry, I'll be fixing that chapter soon after.

And as for the summary, I changed it to "…the explanation of why I am in the Head's common room, backing Draco Malfoy up against a bookcase." instead of a wall.

Also, this is taking place in their seventh year, February-ish. Yes, I definitely will add a Valentine's Day scene.

As for my reviewers. THANK YOU SO MUCH! I didn't think I'd get nearly as much reviews as I had thought!

And thanks for the lovely ideas! Ooh, I'm so excited to write some of the coming tasks! Eek! And if you have more ideas, please please please dont hesitate to add it in your review.

So, I shall leave you with this:

Review, please with sugar on top. :)