5: Ratings
After gently putting the hobbit back onto his lawn-chair and setting the pipe by his fuzzy feet on the ground, Arden decided that perhaps this wasn't a lost cause after all. It was then she got another idea… if she couldn't get any dirt from talking to Frodo, then maybe she could by taking a peek inside of his house.
She pushed on the round, green door to see if it was open and then proceeded to go inside. The first things that Arden checked were the photo-albums. There were a few shots of him as a child, some family-stills, but no girlfriends or anything juicy. She tried the computer. Maybe he had an online diary or something (since she had already searched for a real diary).
Arden turned the monitor on and saw what she thought to be Frodo's buddy list. Something then caught her eye… iRuleDAgalaxE was the first screen name on the list and she had a feeling she knew who that was.
iRuleDagalaxE: hey dude, whas /\ ?
Arden thought fast. After sufficiently smirking and giggling at the hobbit's SN, she typed up something that might just justify this whole night.
HairyLILgiant: nm, hey dude, mind tellin' me again about how you felt when Obi-Wan first found out u were evil?
HairyLILgiant: just outta curiosity of course
iRuleDagalaxE: sure man. Well, it kinda made me…
So that was how Arden received all the information she needed and more—er—much more. She printed out their entire conversation and stuffed it into her purse.
iRuleDagalaxE: I just wish he'd give me some attention. I mean I AM the friggin chosen one after all, man. What is UP with that Windu guy, man?
HairyLILgiant: uh, dunno man g2g bye
THE NEXT MORNINGHer boss skimmed over the online conversation and listened to the tape that Arden had recorded. He grinned and told her she was going up in his book and with that told her to change the screen-names and put this stuff on the air as soon as she'd like. So that was what she did.
That day on Afternoon with Arden, she broke the shocking news of Frodo's alcoholism and Anakin's heart-wrenching thirst for attention. Ratings went through the roof! The audience cooed and cried until finally, they decided to pay visits and send cards to these two poor, troubled souls.
