Insanity time! Okay it is back with a rash!
Disclaimer, I don't own anybody or anything in the SP universe. I did make up the gamer tag and used my own later. BTW a COS player is one that puts on customs to imitate their favorite characters. I had this idea way before Xplay so SCREW YOU XPLAY! It was originally for doom3 but who says it is dead?
Chapter3, What happens when your partner is a COS. Player.
We now return to the worlds stealthiest not-Splinter Cells.
Then why did we hire them?
Cause we can't afford anyone else.
Not even Fisher?
Fisher? Fuck that dude he has the crabs.
Really?
Yes!
So why didn't we hire him?
Cause we are racists towards to people with AIDS, Gays, Lesbians, blacks and most importantly Mexicans.
So basically we are like the Christian mothers of America?
Yes, only we don't care about violence in video games.
Good point, now do your job.
Okay.
"Last recorded message between an announcer voice and President Gorge W Bushwhack. Oh and this one."
Two of the worlds best unofficial agents now are in Russia where they must find a missing author and report back to The Office of Racists People, oh I mean Congress. You know what this job sucks and doesn't pay enough, G4 please take me back.
This mission follows special agent Steven and special agent INU21. Also refereed as Jim in this story.
Steve slowly crawled
down the pole as two guards walked past him, "Um Bio GOD!" As
Steve recalls that means, "Oh my God!" in Russian.
"Jim I
need back up." Steve called as Jim fell on top of him. "Dumb son
of a bitch!" Steve called out as he shot one of the guards before
his partner knocked him out and shot the other two in the head with
the M 16.
"Are you okay?" Jim asked as Steve got up and dragged the two bodies and put them in a corner. "They are a little randy don't you think?" Jim asked as one was on the other's lap.
"Dude, that's totally sick." Steve then hit the guard on top and he got into doggy style position. "Holy Hell!" He then hit them again and then his head was on the man's crotch. "Screw it, come on we can take the elevator without hitting the guards." Steve then got in the elevator but Jim just stood there. "What is it?"
"I'm a Super Sayin I can fly!" He said proudly as he made the sound like something dying in a meat grinder but to him it sounded like he was powering up.
"No you're not now get your ass in here." Steve then got out and threw him in there and the elevator left. "Son of a dirty anime BITCH!" he shouted as Jim then rolled out of no where to the ledge of the building and crawled onto the ledge where Steve was.
"I told you I was a sayin! I am the prince of Sayins!" He shouted profusely.
"Will shut up with the Damn Anime shit? That show was the dumbest piece of crap ever invented." Steve called the elevator again. When it came down this time Jim shot Steve in the back of the head and rode the elevator up. Again he rolled out of nowhere to revive Steve.
"Please stop that." Steve got back up and called the elevator again.
"Stop what?" Jim asked like he didn't do anything.
"You know damn strait what the hell you did." He pouted as they both got in the elevator and rode it up to the next floor. Jim then hit Steve in the head starting a fistfight. Steve started to hit-and-roll making Jim mad. "Oh can't touch this." He sang then Jim took out his silenced pistol and capped him in the knee. "OUCH! What the hell was that man? You shot me in my knee, it was a fist fight." He complained as Jim healed him with magic floating medical pack.
"Okay the kid is in the room on the far left so check for trip wire beams." They put on their thermal vision goggles and Jim put his mask over his eyes.
"I'm little Slugger!" He announced. Steve just looked at him and shook his head.
"Stay here, keep guard while I grab the kid." Steve made some slick maneuvers to get over the trip wires as he opened the door he found the kid. He was wearing a TO Jersey as he sat playing GTA San Andreas.
"I need to make a co-op story for this one two." He talked to himself. Steve then knocked him out and took him to the hallway. All of a sudden his chat device was filled with clutter.
"Steve our commander is here and he isn't to happy." Jim talked through the headset.
"Hold on I'll be there in a few minutes." He quickly grabbed the boy and jumped over the trip beams and went to the hallway. There was Sam Fisher holding a magnum at Jim.
"Now which one of you got me fired by saying I have crabs?" Sam pointed the gun at the two.
"He did!" Jim pointed at Steve as he got shot in the groin by the magnum and fell over dead. Sam then licked his hand and gave Jim a high five.
"Now you have Crabs!" He said merely as he jumped down the elevator shaft hitting the floor and dying. They called the elevator up and rode it down to the drop zone.
"I finally had a partner that actually made it through a mission!" Steve shouted as they walked neat the lift zone but they got a bus piloted by the Christian mothers of America colt, I mean organization.
"Now who's the racists?" Ten women asked as Jim threw grenade. The explosion made their bodies fly in a patriotic flare.
"Did you really need to kill them?" Steve asked.
"Well yes, that was Fooly cooly!" He referenced another anime. Then the drop ship came down and picked up the two.
Mission complete for once.
So what did you think of the adventures of Steve so far. I know there is one person that has read this and has not reviewed, not to mention put it under your favorites so reviews much appreciated.
