Live These Words
Written By: Lucky Shamrock

Disclaimer: J.K Rowling owns all. I'm just a meager fan fiction writer.
Rating: R (Violence, Strong Language, Adult Situations)
Pairing: Remus/OC

Authors Note: This story is based off of the events in another story I have wrote, 'Now and Then' which is as of this moment discontinued because I didn't like where it was going. I think I'm one of those starving artists that is tries to hard to get things perfect. While I enjoyed my run with 'Now and Then' I also during these last months of writers block worked out the kinks in that story, noticed how slow-going things went, and how in general I wasn't happy with myself. I was lucky enough to receive kind reviews, and shouts of support so I just couldn't give up on 'Now and Again' all together.

This story as it stands is not 'Now and Then' re-wrote. This simply has the same basic (and I do mean basic) plotline. Meaning, if you've read 'Now and Then' you can still read this and think of this as a whole new story. Some things won't come as a surprise, and some things very much will come as a surprise because where I stand on this right now is that this story is an all new story.

For those of you that weren't with me for 'Now and Then' all you have to know is some love breaks the bonds of time, and that holds true more for a certain Remus Lupin. This is dedicated for all the Remus Lupin fans out there that want to see our number one werewolf happy in the end.

Thank-you,
-Lucky Shamrock


"It's Time Now - To Sing Out
Tho' The Story Never Ends
Let's Celebrate
Remember, A Year In The Life Of Friends."
Rent - Seasons of Love


Once in relationship, the bond between Twin Flames can only be compared to the bond between identical twins. They are aware of each others thoughts, feelings, desires and needs at a level that is hard to imagine. The depth of Love is such that to be apart even for a day is a hardship. What is meant by that is that their hearts literally hurt when they are separated from each other.


July 17, 1967

Remus Lupin loved the outdoors. No matter how dangerous his Mother always told him it was, he wandered about the forest behind their small yet cozy cottage, at eight years old he already felt as if he was immortal--nothing could hurt him! Not even falling down a tree, which he had of course done the week previous and got an earful from his Mother because of it. He was an "odd sort" according to his Father, which was simply because of Remus having a fondness of all magical beings that lived near their home. Remus had even made friends with the gnomes that ravaged his Mothers petunia garden.

Which was why today Remus was doing what he did best. Wandering around the forest, climbing the occasional tree, and wondering why that Bundimun growing on one of the oak tree's didn't want to chat. Although, it might have been because Bundimun's were fungus and only had eyes--not mouths. Still, it caused this young wizard to ponder about living life as a green glob that just watched people and things without speaking it's mind. Did it even have a mind? Complex thoughts for an eight year old, but Remus thanks to his Mother had already been schooled on a basic level. After all, she didn't want her son to go to Hogwarts with a box of rocks where his brain was supposed to be.

Although, it was in this wondering about the green blob with eyes and how horrible it would be to live a life like that, when Remus became lost. Which considering that he spent most of his day's in the forest was hard to believe. The sun was already starting to dim, pushing him out of his thoughts with a frown as he looked around. Hazel eyes darting up towards the sky, with a shake of his head.

"Mum's going to kill me." Stated out loud in a whine that only a young boy could pull off. He was, as the sun set--officially late for dinner. He hadn't meant to loose track of time, or where he was for that matter, it just happened. However, his Mother would have his head for being late. Out after dark, Remus would be surprised if she didn't send a search party.

That was the least of his worries at the moment though. Dread in his stomach about being yelled at once again by his parents started to fill his whole body. He was lost. The kid that prided himself on being the best of everything there was to be the best of had ended up lost in the woods, which were growing darker--and a tad more frightening then before.

He had managed to stay calm though, no tears, no yells for his Mother or Father --who should by now be home from work. Although retracing his steps was rather hard to do in the dark, since he kept tripping over fallen logs, and roots of trees that ended up in his way. At one point during his retracing he ended up tripping on a log, and skinning his knee on another one. Feeling the bark of the tree bite into his kneecap as he fell wasn't a pleasant feeling.

He sat there for a moment, just looking up at the sky which while was utterly dark, had oddly enough been allowing a bit of light into the forest. Full moon. Of course. He didn't have to worry though right? Nothing would attack an eight year old with a skinned knee in the middle of the woods. So instead of thinking about the horrible possible outcomes of the situation he went about looking over his skinned knee. The tanned flesh was already starting to bleed and Remus could only just smirk--that was so cool! He was a boy, what else did you expect?

It was in these few moments when Remus had forgotten all about being late for dinner, and about being lost in the woods. He just sat there, pressing his hand to his kneecap to get it to stop bleeding before he continued to walk. For such a young child he was calm about this sort of thing, this after all--wasn't his first skinned knee.

However, when the hair on the back of his neck rose he knew something was wrong. The feeling in the air changed, and that dread that had sat in his heart was now returning full force. Eyes darted around the dim forest, as he slowly came to a stand. His now blood covered hand was wiped on his well worn gray tee shirt, and his kneecap had finally stopped bleeding.

Standing there for a moment, he took a deep breath. Wondering how long it would take until his parents started to look for him. Of course this was answered with a shrill cry, "Remus John Lupin! You are in so much trouble mister!" His Mothers voice would never inspire angels to sing, or bridges to be built. It would however inspire Remus to start running towards the voice he heard. His Mother was mad, but once he explained that he was lost she'd be fine. At least he hoped so.

In his running he forgot about the dread he felt, the fact that it was the full moon, and the fact that his knee had been bleeding enough to warrant him wiping the blood onto his shirt. Although even if he remembered this he probably wouldn't have been saved. As he ran he heard it, something running behind him. He prayed that this was just his imagination, which he had been told by his Father several times that he had too much of. Yes, that was it...his mind was playing tricks on him.

All hope for that faded away when something heavy leapt at him, and tore into his shoulder. "MUM!" All he could yell in pain. This wasn't like falling down a tree, or scraping his knee--this was real pain. The kind that real monsters created. The kind of monster, he was doomed to become.


For a five year old, Kit Anderson was pretty smart. After all, with her parents always gone or asleep she had to learn to fend for herself. Knowing that as the sun went down, she would have at least a bit of time before someone got home, stumbling in home drunk, or angry. She had enough time to make herself a snack, and go up to her room to fall asleep while watching The Avengers which was a show that her parents had put their foot down to her watching whenever they were home.

They weren't home now of course, Daddy was at work, and Mommy was...doing "Mommy things" Kit wasn't exactly sure what "Mommy things" were, but she did know that in the end Mommy would come home and fall asleep wherever she ended up falling. Usually it was the living room floor. Which was the exact reason why Kit liked to get her snack out of the way, and get to her room before anyone came home. Bread was taken out of the bread drawer, and she went about making the best thing in the whole entire Universe. A peanut butter and Jell-O sandwich.

For a five year old this was like rocket science. Getting out the crunchy peanut butter from the pantry after using a kitchen chair to actually reach the shelf, she went about setting the jar on the counter next to the bread, and then managed to get the bowl of strawberry Jell-O out of the fridge. She was lucky in the fact that there was indeed food in the house. Grandma had come to the rescue in Grandmotherly fashion and ended up taking Kit earlier that day to the market, and getting enough food to last a month. Kit was thankful for this as she made her sandwich, which usually got her made fun of by her Daddy whenever he saw her making it. After all, it wasn't entirely normal to put Jell-O on a sandwich.

It was however what she liked, and she did it well enough on her own--even if her hands ended up covered in crunchy peanut butter. Soon her hands were washed, the bread, peanut butter, and Jell-O put back to their respected places. A glass of water was made, and the plate with her creation on it was grabbed. She was ready for the adventures of John Steed and Emma Peel alright, even if she didn't get or understand most of the jokes or situations for that matter.

Clad in pink footie pajamas the young one headed upstairs, her water dripping onto the carpet a bit--but it would dry before anyone got home. Kit's parents bought her a television because of the fact that they didn't want to have to entertain her. For parents they weren't very good at the whole parenting thing. In fact, they weren't even that good at the whole husband and wife thing come to think about it. Although Kit, in a way was happy. This was her life, she would accept it. For a five year old, she could imagine each and every other person in the world having parents like hers...so it wasn't that weird right?

First her plate would be set down on her mattress, and the glass of water set down on the trunk in front of her bed, before small hands turned her television on and turned the dial to five just in time for the opening credits to The Avengers. She sat in bed rather happy with herself, a day out with her grandmother, a yummy sandwich, the sounds of London floating in her window as the voice of John Steed lulled her to sleep, half finished with her sandwich, and water long since forgotten.

It would however be only a few moments before the young girl would wake up screaming. Her body was shaking so badly, and her shoulder hurt! Worse then anything before, there was nothing worse then this feeling. Not even the time when her Daddy accidentally shut her hand in the car door. She screamed, until her voice was gone, her face beat red, and covered with tears. The small child had fallen out of her bed at some point and managed to squeeze herself in a corner.

What had caused the pain? Why did she hurt so much? Unzipping the front of her nightwear she was able to see an unmarred shoulder. It hurt so much though! There should have been some kind of mark, even a five year old knew that. Although before she could think straight another wave of pain hit her, and she had passed out.


October. 3, 1993

Remus Lupin glanced at his reflection in the mirror. For a thirty-three year old he wasn't too bad looking. His body was lean, and lanky. He was in good shape, he just...looked sickly. Then again, the full moon had been the night previous. It was hard to stand on his own two feet, but he didn't want Snape to teach his class again--those poor children. In his reflection as he dressed he noticed his shoulder, bite marks from the very first brush with death he had ever experienced in his life.

The night he had become a werewolf. He of course remembered it like it was yesterday, the way the werewolf's breath felt against his neck, the way the warm blood just seemed to leak everywhere. The only reason he had been saved was his screaming. One moment the werewolf was on him, the next the creature was blown off of his back by a spell from his Father who had been out looking for him along with his Mother.

Of course his Father knew right away the life that Remus was doomed for. His Mother on the other hand was in denial, even when John Lupin carried their young boy back to the cottage yelling to get the fire place ready because Remus needed to go to St. Mungo's.

A sigh was given, and he shook his head with a frown before pulling his robes up to hide his scarred chest from view. He remembered that night too well. He didn't want to remember at all. Too much pain to remember the past, too many things lingered there that Remus would rather forget then mourn. Like Kit. A tired blink of surprise was given as he moved from the mirror towards his door. Had he really just thought that--about her?

Hands came up to massage the bridge of his nose before combing his graying hair back--it was going to be a long day if he kept his mind in the past. Thinking of her caused him to think about everything, James, Lily, Peter, Sirius of the past, and Sirius of the present--crazy, lurking somewhere out there. Remus didn't like thinking of these things. Remus never liked thinking of things that would cause the knot in his stomach to grow. Unfortunately once he started, he couldn't stop.

Kit had been his everything, his life literally revolved around her. If something was wrong he could always go to her with his problems, she understood. Not because she knew what it was like to be what he was of course, but because she had problems of her own. They took solace in each other. When he was with her, the pain didn't exist. Then she was gone--dropped off the face of the planet. Even Dumbledore couldn't find her. Leaving Remus alone. Even if he had great friends, he was still...alone. A werewolf with a girlfriend, that was rich. Funny if he thought about it.

He felt empty. Ever since he lost her he felt as if he was dying. Day by day a little piece of him gone until he stood now a shell of who he formerly was. He could smile all he wanted, he could form minds of young ones, and look at Harry Potter in just the right way and see James sitting there. It still wasn't enough to fill him up. He felt like a man that had walked through the desert for ages, and had nothing to drink--slowly dying of thirst as he walked on, searching for that water in the distance...

"Professor Lupin?"

Remus blinked, looking up from his desk with a frown. He had been so lost in thought that half the day had gone by already. The third year Gryffindor and Slytherin students now sat before him, with Hermione Granger taking the lead by getting his attention. Had he really been so lost in thought that he didn't even notice the students coming in? So lost in thought that he didn't even remember leaving his room and getting to his classroom? Didn't even remember the first class of the day?

"Ah yes, sorry--a bit lost in thought if you will. Please, turn to page 232; we will be learning about defensive tactics today." His voice cracked a bit...today. No wonder why he was thinking so much about the past--today was the day that Kit disappeared. He gave a sigh and turned to the chalkboard. He just needed to finish with this class, and then he could throw himself a pity party. He was surprisingly good at that. The class went on, and while he might have lost himself in explaining certain tactic's of wizards and witches long past--his thoughts were still on her. So much so that when he stepped out onto the floor to show exactly how to be on the defensive, he ended up bumping his knee straight into Ron Weasley's desk. Enough to pull his thoughts to the present with that sudden burst of pain. Sure, he had felt a lot of pain in his life, but it still hurt like the dickens to bump your knee into something as hard as a desk.

It was during this moment when he gave a chuckle with the class at his own expense that something happened. Remus wasn't entirely sure as to what, seeing as one moment his knee was aching, and he was laughing at his own lack of grace, the next the whole class gasped all together. He blinked, only in time to have his vision assaulted by the brightest light he had probably ever seen in his life.

Before he had time to grab his wand, before he had time to do something to protect himself...something was thrown against his chest--knocking him and whatever was thrown to him to the floor. For a moment he laid there dazed, now adding to the throb in his knee, his chest hurt. Sometimes it just didn't pay to get out of bed in the morning. Especially when he didn't feel all to well to begin with.

Hazel eyes blinked, his vision swimming for a moment before letting him look to see something--someone laying next to him. She was out cold, a small trickle of blood escaping her nose, and Remus felt his heartbeat explode in his chest.

Orange hair hung around her face in a manor that made it look as if she didn't brush her hair much, Hogwarts uniform was baggy on her small body, her pale skin made her look sickly, but she was wearing it--the silver charm bracelet around her wrist that robes would have hidden if she had been wearing them over her uniform. Four silver charms hung around that bracelet, a stag, a dog, a mouse (it was supposed to be a rat--but of course no one made a rat charm for a bracelet, go figure), and a wolf in a howling sort of stance.

Remus blinked, he felt his whole world spin. "Kit?" All he could choke out as he heard someone who sounded remarkably like James yelling for someone to get Madam Pomfrey. Remus didn't hear much after that, didn't feel much, because Remus John Lupin; had just fainted into oblivion.