A/N: Yay! I got two reviews- hahaha go me x)- so I decided to continue. Haha. I also think I'm going to add in stuff from Pirates of the Caribbean and Ocean's Eleven/Twelve!
Lei454: Psh... yeah... who would name a guy "jub"... winkwinknudgenudge. Hahahhahahah... Thanks for being my first reviewer! Lol. Keep on reviewing ;)
ADepressedSpooty: Lol, nice attempt at a flame . I don't think you're able to write a NOT nice review! Thanks so much you made me feel so good about my writing haha! I'm really excited when people find my writing funny... I have no idea why but it just means a lot to me x) I don't know why, but I like to make Harry a drug addict... Heehee...
Izzy/Rodio Girl/Whatever!: Yay, you reviewed! I'm so happy! Thanks so much! Yay I'm happy you're laughing! Read and review the later chappies, bitch! Woot! Never let go! Grody/gnarly/rancid... Bwahahahahah x) Oh! You have to read this chapter because I talk about Afrika! And how she called boobs bobs! I MISS AFRIKA AND HER BOBS! Remember when Karis slept on my bobs on Oswegotchie? ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!! Lylas ;) THAT WAS A JOKE DON'T MURDER ME!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the trillions of characters I would like to have in this story. Not even jub himself ;)
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"Hey, hot stuff, what's your name?" Draco Malfoy rubbed sleazily up against Manny. She was standing in a corner of the room. Trying to make it look like she had more cleavage. As if that was possible...
Manny looked up nervously. "Oh, I'm Manny," she said, not realizing that her bob (A/N: I accidentally typed this, and this is what my Spanish friend from camp called them, so boobs are now christened "bobs". The end) was hanging siliconely out of her shirt.
Malfoy raised his eyebrows up and down at the sight of it. He also raised something else. Except that wasn't on purpose.
Seeing the second raised body part, Manny was a bit concerned. She was used to guys getting boners, but it was usually after she made out with them for a while. Then she saw her dangling bob dangling danglishly. She shoved back into her bra. Then she grabbed Draco's arm and pulled him through the throng of characters and into the Entrance Hall.
The Entrance Hall had been decorated with large, leafishly shady palm trees to match the warm and artifically magical climate.
She shoved Draco into a broom closet and followed him inside. She shut the door quickly behind them and in negative eight nanoseconds the gong gonged very gigantically. In fact, it was so gigantic that there was an earthquake and one of the slim and shady trees fell crookedly and blocked the entrance to the closet. They were locked in!
Truthfully, both of them were somewhat intrigued at the idea. Sexually excited, that is.
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The gong had gonged itself painfully to announce the arrival of another group. Duh. The noise in the Dining Hall immidiately muted. Harry wasn't informed of the mutation, so he was standing there trying to speak but nothing was coming out of his mouth. But this often happened when he was high, so he just continued babbling mutedly.
Everyone not sexually excitedly looked at the entrance of the Dining Hall to see who was arriving.
For some reason, these guests arrived in fast motion instead of slow motion. They were the cast of Lord of the Rings! Whoopdeedoo! Except for some reason Legolas cut all his long, Barbie-like blonde locks off and dyed them curly black. How strange.
"Wow, look at that guy," Hermione gushed so gushedly she squeezed the gushing goo out of one of the Gushers she was holding in her now Gusher-covered gushing hand. Gushedly. Gush.
Hermione was looking at the new and improved Legolas Greenleaf, and she was talking to Ginny. She turned to ask Ginny why Ginny wasn't freaking out at the sight of Leglas Greenleaf. But she wasn't there! What the hey?
Oh well, more for me! Hermione thought giddily as she skipped on her ears over to Legolas Greenleaf.
"Hello, my name is Ginevra Maurice Weasley," Hermione ingtroduced herself, holding out a hand for Legolas Greenleaf to shake. "D'oh! I mean Homer Simpson! D'oh! I mean! Fuck! Hermione Granger!" She hit herself on the forehead with her hand that wasn't covered in gushedly gushing Gushers. Damn. She screwed up her intro with the infamous Legolas Greenleaf. Stupid! D'umbass!
"I'm Legolas," he said, putting a piece of that bread that fills you up for a long time into Hemione's hand, not knowing what else to do. "What's your name? Ginevra Maurice Weasley D'oh I Mean Homer Simpson D'oh I Mean Fuck Hermione Granger?"
"It's okay if you're stupid; you're still gorgeous." That was Hermione's response. That thing right to the left of these words. Or is it left to the right of these words? Jeez...
By that time, many more guests had arrived and were now patrolling the area. Ron and Harry were having a nice chat with Linus Caldwell.
"I'm Ronald," Ron introduced himself. He thought that he sounded more official being called Ronald. He didn't realize that there was a dirrty clown who advertised a dirty restaurant whose name was also Ronald.
"Linus," Linus Caldwell said. These people were slightly inferior to him. He didn't like it.
"Oh, I forgot to tell you, my name is Harry." That was what Harry said. Because the author COUGH forgot to introduce him. COUGH. Teehee that's fun... COUGH COUGH COUGH-
"Will you STOP coughing?!" Ron(ald) commanded. "Jeez..." He was annoyed.
"Doesn't that guy kind of look like-" Harry started.
"Don't! Don't even say it," Linus inturrupted inturruptingly in a Linus fashion. Caldwell.
"Jeez..." Harry grumbled. He scratched his nose. 'Twas itchy. 'Twas it not? Oh, my bad then.
Linus Caldwell tripped and stepped on Ron's shoe.
"Hey!"
"Sorry; tripped," Linus responded. He walked away, pocket a little heavier than before... Except, not really.
"Douchebag..." Ronald murmbled under his breath.
On the other side of the room three quarters of an eighth of negative twelve centimeters away, Ginevra Maurice Weasley was talking to Kathryn Merteuil.
"My middle name isn't Maurice!" she spazzed.
"In denial, are we? This should be fun..." Kathryn gooed.
Ginny made a face. "What's your favorite type of cheese?" she considered.
"Swiss. Yours?"
"I like bleu. It's spelled funnelly. Funnelly. Like a funnel! I peed into one of those once..."
"Thanks for sharing." A thought suddenly struck Kathryn Merteuil in her cruel brain. It was quite full to the brinking brim with cruel intentions. She suddenly realized that she could suddenly black mail the poor Maurice with the fact that she peed into a funnel once! Honestly, who pees into funnels nowadays? God.
She snickered and a Snickers bar came out of her nose.
"Has anyone seen Manny?" Shane Kippel asked. Whoopsie-daisy! I meant Gavin-Spinner. The dude who spins Gavins. Yuh-huh.
"No" Kathryn and Ginevra Maurice spoke in unison.
"My middle name isn't MAURICE! That's like, a boys name! Gross! Boys have cooties!" Ginny double spazzed. Then she turned to Kathryn. "Jinx! One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten! Hahaha! You owe me a... a..."
"What base have you been to?" Kathryn. Inturruptedly.
"Huh? Oh, in baseball, you mean? I got a home run once!"
"No, douchebag fucktard. I meant like what base." She used the secret eye code of eyelashes to explain what she meant.
"OH! ...Zerothe base..." Ginevra Maurice Manuella Santos- whoopsie-daisy! Wrong name! The annoying redhead said it...
"Well, I'll give you a free lesson for the jinx, how about that?" Kathryn arranged the puzzle pieces.
"Sure! I have no idea what you just said! Lets play with your rompecabezas!" Ginny skippishly gladded along being Kathryn until they got to another closet in the Entrance Hall. There were several trillions of those. Though, they weren't all closets in the entrance hall.
Just a few (thousandth) doors down, Manny and Draco were in their own little chamber.
"So," Draco started awkwardly. He's never been awkward before. But now Manny was here. And Manny was sexy. And he really liked Manny.
But before he could say anything else to make the awkwardness more apparent, Manny had knocked him over, licking his tongue and unbuttoning his pants.
He pushed her face away from his. "Whoa," he spoke whoaishly. "Whoa. Whoa." Then he ripped her shirt off and resumed kissing.
This time it was she who pulled apart, though. "Dude, that was my favorite shirt, eh?" she said, not really upset. "Have you ever noticed that people think that Canadian people always say "eh", but I don't think anyone's ever said "eh" once on Degrassi?"
"Huh."
They started making out again, Manny's shirt completely ripped from her mind as it was completely ripped from her body.
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As Ron and Harry stood aimlessly in the middle of the aimless and boring room, Ron realized that he still had his Sherlock Holmes outfit on but he had abandoned his search for if he was related to Ellie.
"Don't deny it; you forgot it, girl," he said, snapping his fingers and giving the air the evil eye. Then he marched off, swiftly whipping a magnifying glass out of his pocket and snooping around the room with it. Harry followed lazily behind, sneezing.
Soon he disovered Ellie grouching depressedly in the Depressed Corner. No, seriously, there was a sign made out of water- tears, more snarfishingly- hanging above it that said "The Depressed Corner". Obviously, Ellie was the only one scowling depressedly in it.
Ron sniffed his way up her body until he got to her face. Then he magnified her eyeball. "Are you related to me?!" he questioned scarily.
"Um... Who are you?" she asked depressedly (and rudely). Then she whispered, "Psycho."
"Ronald Nigel Weasely the Third," he announced lyishly. Liar!
"Oh... Weirdo..." Ellie grumbled, edging slowly away from him and slowly closer to the Depressed Corner.
"What's your last name?" Ron inquiered -ishly.
"...Nash... Why are you so obsessed with me? Go away, Nigel!" she commanded with a flick of her hand.
Ron felt as though he'd been pushed back. That was odd. Very oddish indeed. She didn't make any contact with her... And yet it felt as though she'd hit him in the face, practically sort of!
Suddenly it dawned on him. "Nash!" he triumphed. "Nash! Nash!"
"That's my name, don't wear it-"
"I don't like your attitude!" Harry threatened, stepping into the corner and raishing a threatening hand threateningly, growling with growlish and scary eyes.
"Nash! That's the secret codeword! NASH! You ARE related to me!" Ron exasperished ................Yeah...
"What the-?"
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A/N: Bleh, that was bad. I wasn't in as silly of a mood... :- pooh. Well, review anyway. I'll review parts of the chapter if you really don't like it.
