Okay so here's the big R-rated chapter. It took so long because I really, really didn't want it to be cheesy - but love scenes are kind of inherently cheesy, so I did my best. And I need a cold shower. XD

consummation
chapter three
words are very unnecessary

Dizziness and heart palpitations didn't stop John as he walked out of the dining area towards the bedroom. This mutual admission of love was what he had been wanting so badly for months, and now that it was here. . . He kept reading Kate's words over in his mind - I love you too John - and he feared that actually hearing them might make him faint.

He paused in an attempt to compose himself. This wasn't very heroic behavior, he scolded himself. But he had never been in love, and as far as he knew no one had been in love with him. And his mother never talked about love or anything like it, from, he figured, a desire to suppress her own experiences and the belief that it just wasn't that important to their mission.

So here he was, a blithering mess of emotions and hormones. He took a deep breath and, throwing caution to the wind, entered the bedroom.

Kate was propped up against some pillows, writing in a new notebook. She didn't look up as he walked to the other side of the bed and sat down.

He was trying unsuccessfully to find some words as she put the notebook away, still not looking at him. "Kate, I . . ."

"John," she interrupted him. He turned to look at her; she was sitting on her haunches not a foot away from him, smiling, her hair in her face, her eyes shining. "I love you," she told him in a tone of voice that said That says it all.

He managed to swallow. "I love you, too," he replied, breathless. They were the most sincere words he had ever spoken.

John would have said more, but Kate leaned in and kissed him, wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning into him. He held her tightly, and as she pushed him back onto the bed he became incredibly dizzy again. He'd only done this a couple of times, back with one of Salceda's daughters who just liked to have fun. And that was a long time ago, and --

Kate was now straddling him, and as he fretted she backed away from kissing him and looked into his eyes, and the love and trust he saw there made all self-consciousness leave him.

He reached up and held her face in his hands, overwhelmed. He felt drunk, this didn't feel real - but Kate kissed him again, and it was real, all too wonderfully so.

They managed to disrobe each other almost without stopping the kiss, but when she lowered herself onto him he couldn't help but gasp, and she took the opportunity to start kissing his neck. He hadn't quite caught his breath again when she worked his way back to his mouth, but that was okay. If he were to suffocate, at least he would die happy.

She started to move, slowly, but he didn't want to go there yet, he wanted to stay like this, just the two of them together.

Kate made a small sound of surprise as he sat up, but quickly adjusted and wrapped her legs around him. They held onto each other as he kissed her neck, working his way down her chest. Her breathing was speeding up, and she clearly wanted to step up the action now. He released his grip on her, allowing her space to move, which she began to do.

Her eyes were closed, and John just watched her face, literally high on her beauty. There was one trick he knew; it wasn't a fancy one, but her eyes flew open when he reached down and used it. She bucked up, moaning a little, and he held his breath as she came. She was just too beautiful, too smart, too perfect to be his.

But she was, and as her body continued shaking he laid her down on the bed. She wrapped her legs around him and ran his hands through his hair as they kissed. They moved together like that, still kissing until it was his turn and he buried his face in her neck, muffling his cry.

They gazed at each other, panting, and Kate reached up and held his face as he had held hers.

He lay down next to her, not even self-conscious about his nakedness, and wrapped an arm around her waist. He wanted so badly to say in words what he felt in his heart, but as if she sensed what he was thinking, she gave him a kiss and turned onto her side, nestling against him and holding onto the arm that remained wrapped around her waist.

John put his other arm under her head for it to rest on, and soon he felt her body relax against him as she fell asleep. He gently laid his own head against hers, breathing in the scent of her hair. It smelled of sweat and government-issue shampoo, and it was the most beautiful scent in the world.