These mossy walls,
their stones are old.
More open lands you love, perhaps.
Here,
walk beside me. You look cold;
Around your shoulders, please, draw
this wrap.
Do you remember Grey Mithrandir?
With the
learned I have studied.
Ah, for his wisdom! If it were mine,
Would
my hands have stayed unbloodied?
Could I find in books
salvation?
Do not believe all wisdom's arms;
I lift my sword up
for my nation,
But learning deflects deeper harms.
Deeper
harms with wounds that linger.
If hearts are strong, bodies will
heal.
You and I, we know they mingle,
We know despair's sword,
sharp and real.
My father loved my elder brother,
When I
was small I saw his smile.
He sometimes even smiled for
others,
But not for me, his younger child.
My brother taken
from his side,
My father's sharpness cut my heart.
Though I had
thought to stem that tide,
To harden feelings, set
apart...
Defenses he always perceived,
Relentless force,
his comments pierced.
Would he have brought me to my knees?
I
tried to please; he remained fierce.
Oh father, why was there
no blessing?
Why did you turn your face from me?
If I gave my
life, never resting
Would my brother's smile be given
me?
Mithrandir told me father loved me,
That he would show
it nigh his end,
Why did his approval drive me
To his will, my
own to bend?
Now he lays in ash, no longer
Can I reach him.
But his voice...
I remember it grew stronger
After he had
made his choice.
Fragments I remember, dry
wood...
Smoke-scent, soft oil. Then the flames...
And somewhere
in that fire, I could
Hear my father scream my name.
Tangled
thoughts and tangled feelings,
Through my fevered mind they've
wandered.
Dire events - I still am reeling,
Come, walk with me,
and let me ponder.
These are dark times, do not mind me;
My
words stumble without a grace.
Thank you for your listening
silence,
The quiet moonlight on your face.
