Disclaimers from the gang!

McKay: Hi all… ummm… due to copyright laws and all… we have to disown all the songs featured in the… musical. (coughcough)

Sheppard: That's enough Rodney, just get to the point.

Weir: Yeah, I'm sick of standing out here.

Teyla and Ford come out to. Teyla puts her hands on her hips impatiently.

Teyla: I need to get my beauty sleep major!

Sheppard: Wasn't me! It was those copyright laws… and Weir…

McKay: (yawn)

Sheppard: Anyway the first song went to… umm…

Ford: Kolya… but he can't speak for himself… he did Hey Jude by the Beatles.

Sheppard: God that was bad…

All: Amen.

Teyla: Who was next?

Ford: I believe it was one of the Wraith… must have been Steve, since Bob took his revenge on Steve's death…

Sheppard: Yeah yeah yeah! That's right, he starting singing We Will Rock You by Queen.

McKay: That he did… (yawn)

Ford: And after that lame attempt of revenge? Who was next… I don't remember it being very good…

Sheppard: That's because you have NO taste in music… it was Beckett… he was singing Take It Easy by the Eagles.

Teyla, thoughtfully: I like the Eagles.

Sheppard: Good… we can have an Eagles party… let's go and leave this lame stuff to the fic writers.

Seanait, Nightpheonix, and Weir: GET BACK THERE!

Everyone whimpers.

McKay: Okay… that takes on a whole new meaning of "Big Brother watches over us."

Sheppard: More like "Big Sisters watch over us." I can see them all gleaming with pride up there…

Ford: Probably…

Teyla: Let us get this lame part over with, shall we?

Sheppard: Yeah… next?

They all start to laugh.

Sheppard: Well? Who!

Teyla: I believe it was you major.

Ford: Yeah sir… with your dying pigeon dance!

McKay: I see it now… Major John Sheppard and his rendition of Edward H.'s War. Or whatever it's called… what's his name anyway? I can never seem to remember it…

Sheppard: It's four letters right?

Ford: Yeah.. it's umm… what is it?

McKay: WAIT! I got his name all wrong… it's Edwin Starr.

Ford: Like Ringo Starr?

McKay: Sort of, but Ringo Starr's name is a pseudonym.

Ford: A what?

Sheppard: A false name. His real name is Richard Starkey.

Teyla: I can see why he changed it…

Ford: Oh no… Bob was next…

Sheppard puts his head in his hands.

McKay: Sympathy for the Wraith? Now who manipulates a great song like Sympathy for the Devil like that?

Sheppard, Ford, and Teyla: The Wraith.

McKay: Good point.

Sheppard: And that's by the Rolling Stones.

McKay: Exactly. Now the guitar thing… that was weird.

Ford: Yeah I thought so too…

Sheppard: Me three.

Teyla: I fourth?

Sheppard: Haha… after that was the intermission…

McKay: Damn I'm starving after that! (picks up some food next to him and eats it.) PAH! LEMONS! WHO PLANTED THIS HERE! BATES!

All start to snicker as McKay rampages.

Sheppard: Anyway… who was after that? (mutters) Bloody puddlebox.

It comes zooming from offstage, nails Sheppard in the head, and keeps going.

McKay: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Sheppard: Daaaaamn! That was strange! Ow…

Teyla: The band started to play Michael Jackson's Thiller for me.

She does a little more moonwalking.

Ford to McKay: Dang is she good…

McKay: Yeah…

Sheppard: Hey! McKay, you started singing All Across the Universe by the Beatles didn't you?

McKay: Actually, yeah!

Teyla: Then you all sang and the room rumbled.

Sheppard: Jai guru daya…

All: Ommm…

(Rumble)

McKay: See, now that's just weird!

Ford, chuckling: Then you and Zelenka couldn't help but sing Two Of Us also by the Beatles.

McKay: We like that song!

Sheppard: Uh huh… little too much fun…

McKay: Oh yeah? Well then you started singing the theme song to Mission: Impossible.

Sheppard blushes.

McKay: HA!

Ford: He got you there sir.

Teyla: That he did.

McKay looks proud.

Sheppard grins at the next part: Ah yes, then Elizabeth starting singing Rescue Me by Motown. And somebody got a little jealous.

McKay, blushing: I did not!

Teyla and Ford snicker loudly again.

McKay: Hey!

Teyla: It is your own fault doctor.

Sheppard: She has a point there McKay, but then you slapped really bad!

McKay blushes even deeper.

McKay: Shut up…

Sheppard: Oh wait… missed one song… after I got rescued Weir sang Dream On by Aerosmith to Rodney, didn't she?

Ford: Oh yeah!

Teyla: I believe you are easy to target as you say…

Ford: Sir… act four you started to sing our Atlantis song… you know the one where people wanted to get on the show?

Sheppard: Actually, I believe the credit goes to SG-1…

Ford: Ah…

McKay: That explains a lot.

Sheppard, grins slyly: And everyone knows what was after that?

All except Rodney: I like pink Wraiths!

They start laughing hysterically.

McKay: Maaaan… what have I done?

Ford: Then, sir, you started It's the End of the World As We know It or whatever it's called, by REM and Weir, McKay, and I joined in.

Sheppard: That you did!

Teyla: Then we all decided to sing We Didn't Start the Fire by Billy Joel.

Sheppard: How'd you know that?

Teyla: Doctor Weir tells me these things…

Sheppard: Good point.

McKay: That was a huge song.

Ford: I'd have to agree.

Sheppard: Then who was next? Or what was next?

Teyla: Well, Bates again accused me of working for the Wraith.

She growls.

Ford: That's definitely not normal…

Teyla: The Wraith part of me can be overwhelming sometimes…

All step away from her.

Sheppard: Oh?

Teyla: Never mind major… can you not take a joke?

Ford, nervously: Oh, see, she was kidding!

Sheppard: Yess…. Then Weir killed Everett.

McKay: Thank god… he nevers paid attention to us scientists, but no when the whole city croaked…

All: He finally listened.

Sheppard: We know Rodney… next song anyone?

They all think hard.

McKay: Me with A Hole in the World Tonight by the Eagles.

Sheppard: Riiight… and the tomato I believe. How'd that taste?

McKay: Great…

Teyla: Then McKay assaulted you major…

Ford: That's true!

Sheppard: (grumble mumble…)

McKay, ignores last comment: And then…

All: The Moody Atlantians!

McKay: Heh, if we had a newspaper in Atlantis, the headline would be… "AT-1 and Comp. Perform Moody Blues Question."

Sheppard: That was a great song. With the lights and all! Ford, I didn't know you could play guitar.

Ford: I didn't know you could either sir.

Teyla: Then came the infamous Act 5.

All groan.

McKay: My back's killing me.

Sheppard: Well, you did fall from the puddlebox…

McKay: Good point.

Ford: I don't think act 5, in places, was nearly as good as the others.

Sheppard, sarcasm: Well, I wonder why… maybe because… we didn't want to do it?

Ford: Touché.

Sheppard: Thank you.

Teyla: And we all sang Dirty Water who is by… we never figured that out did we?

Sheppard: Nope… is it by Boston?

Ford: I didn't think so…

McKay: Lemme think for a sec…nope, gotta blank…

Random person: The Standells!

All: The Standells?

McKay: I thought they were just oldies…

Ford: Me too.

Sheppard: Me three.

Teyla Who are they? And what about Dr. Kavanau-

Sheppard: Don't go there…

Teyla: Where?

Ford: It's an expression Teyla. It means don't bring up the subject. Kavanaugh doesn't deserve recognition.

Teyla: But the song must.

Sheppard: No one knows who first sang it, but… Mr. Golden Sun by anonymous child.

McKay: What makes you think a child first sang it?

Sheppard: Seems reasonable.

Ford: Besides the fact that children don't generally come up with songs.

Teyla: He is right; very few people can do that...

Sheppard: Ah hush, we're done here. You guys can release us now!

Doors open to reveal Weir and the two writers.

Weir: Good job, now we won't be hunted down for bad disclaimers on songs…

Seanait: Even if we did change the lyrics here and there.

Nightpheonix: You guys can leave.

They get 50 feet from the door.

Nightpheonix and Seanait: Get ready for next season!

All groan audibly.