Chapter Eleven - Swing, Swing
Swing, swing, swing from the tangles of
My heart is crushed by a former love
Can you help me find a way
To carry on again?
"Swing Swing," The All-American Rejects
"You do realize that the guy's supposed to win the giant stuffed animal for the girl, not vice versa." Will joked as Jules pointed excitedly to the large giraffe hanging on the roof.
"I never was a big fan of traditional gender roles," Jules retorted with a grin as she took the giraffe and examined it. "I say we name her Sandy."
"Definitely not. I had a traumatizing experience with a Sandy in Elementary School. Lets just say it involved me soaked with milk and many sleepless nights. I'd rather not recall it." Will responded dramatically.
Jules looked up to him with an amused expression.
"Yeah, don't even ask," Will said, smiling, "and how do we know it's not a guy?"
Jules picked up the giraffe and turned it over, showing it to Will.
"Trust me, it's a girl." Jules said, wiggling her eyebrows. Will's eyes widened slightly before letting his laughter overtake him.
"Okay, that's more than a little bit sketchy."
"So Sandy's out." Jules replied, grinning once again. "How bout Abagail?"
"Nah. I think she's definitely a Suzie."
"Suzie! Brilliant!" Jules exclaimed, placing the giraffe down in front of them. She pulled out the straw from her drink and licked the drips away before pointing it at the giraffe's head. "I officially name this giraffe Ms. Suzie Vaughn."
"Vaughn?" Will exclaimed, pretending to be appauled. "Why does she get to be a Vaughn and not a Tippin?"
"I did win her, after all." Jules joked, jabbing Will softly in the stomache.
"Hey, no need to get violent," Will laughed.
Jules just smiled up at Will as she slipped her free hand into his and leaned into him. Will looked down in suprise, then sighed as they walked in silence out of the carnival and onto the boardwalk.
"So, it's only 9:30, you want to get some coffee or something?" Will asked.
"Actually, I was hoping, maybe we could head over to the beach...I know it's late and all, but it's just been so long..." Jules said nostalgically, looking over to the ocean, which was swaying rhythmically with the night.
Will looked over the boardwalk to the empty beach.
"Sure." He replied, walking her to the steps leading to the sandy shore.
"I know you must think I'm crazy," Jules said, shaking her head as they settled down on the sand. "sitting on the beach, in the middle of the night, on a cold day in December..."
"No, I don't," Will responded quickly as he started to take off his jacket.
"Keep it on," Jules said, shaking her head as she touched Will's arm. "My jacket's warm enough."
"Are you sure?" Will asked questioningly.
"Of course," Jules replied before she broke out into a fit of giggles.
"What?" Will stared at her in wonder. He had never met anyone quite like Jules before, and even though they'd only been out for a few hours, and he'd only known her for a couple of days, he already knew it would be tough to say goodbye. It had been a long time since he felt something for anyone other than Sydney. And it actually felt nice to have someone feel the same way he felt for them.
"Nothing," Jules said as she caught her breath. "You have to excuse my random fits of wierdness. I really have no control over it."
"Oh, I see," Will said smiling as he looked out across the ocean.
"Isn't it beautiful? When you live here you forget how amazing it is to have places like this at your fingertips. I used to love coming to the beach as a kid. There was always something so soothing about it. Even if it was packed with people."
"I know what you mean," Will started, running his hands through the sand, "recently, I've been coming down here a lot more."
Jules looked up at him, practically reading his mind.
"Because of Sydney."
Will snapped his head back up in suprise.
"Wha--How did--"
"I can see it in your eyes." Jules replied simply with a smile. "You like her don't you?"
Will sighed and looked up for a moment before making eye contact with Jules once again.
"Yeah, I used to. Keywords: used to. Something changed recently. Ever since I found out what she really does and what her life is really like, it's just hard to find myself wanting to be with her romantically more than wanting to just be there for her. It's painful more than anything to just sit back and let her go out and risk her life everyday with no one to protect her."
"But that's where you're wrong. She has Mike. It's Mike's job to keep her safe and I can promise you, he is the best guy for the job. Plus, from what I've heard, she can hold her own pretty well, too." Jules said, rubbing Will's arm comfortingly.
Will smiled up at her, then wrapped his arm around her shoulders, letting her rest her head on his shoulder.
"Yeah, I know. You know what? Let's stop talking about Syd. It's just you and me here enjoying our date."
"Here here. I agree." Jules said, as she sat up and moved across from Will. "And you wanna know what I want to do?"
"What?" Will asked with a chuckle.
"I want to know everything about you. Where you grew up, who your friends were, who your first crush was, your most embarassing moment...everything."
"Oh man," Will replied, smacking his head with his hand, "everything?!"
"Yes, or I'll get Mike to 'hunt you down'" Jules said, grinning evilly.
"Oh you so know I could take your brother down. There's no doubt in my mind." Will responded haughtily.
"Yeah, you're probably right. All you have to do is get his knees. That boy's got some weak knees, my friend."
"Thanks, I'll keep that in mind in the future." Will said laughing.
"So, let's see...Where did you grow up, Will Tippin?"
"Right here, Juliana Vaughn. The wonder that is Southern California. Santa Barbara to be precise."
"Hmm, very interesting. I guess that would explain those freckles you have on your face." Jules said, analyzing Will's face closely.
"Hey, I don't have freckles." Will retorted.
"Ha! Yeah right..." Jules said, grabbing Will's face and focusing in on the area next to his right eye. "I see, count em, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven...ten freckles. On this side alone!" Jules's laughing slowly faded away as she noticed the expression on Will's face. She let her hands slide down the side of his face as she locked eyes with him.
"Is that all?" Will said, barely above a whisper.
Jules nodded as her eyes zoned in on his lips.
"Yeah, that's it." Before she knew it her eyes were closed and her lips were on his. All she could see were colors. Colors everywhere. It was unlike anything she had ever experienced. She's kissed guys before. Tons of guys, for that matter, but none of them were like this. None of them has this much...electricity. This much emotion. She couldn't help but wonder what drew this man to her. There was just something about him that she couldn't resist.
The kiss must have lasted for an eternity because Jules could have sworn that everything was happening in slow motion. Her hands wrapping around his neck and her hands were running through his somewhat shaggy hair. She felt his hands exlore the expanse of her back, and though she desperately wanted more, she had to pull her self away.
I can't let this happen. Nothing is this perfect. I can't get too attatched to him...I can't get my heart broken again. I just can't. I don't have the energy for this. I can't keep living my life like this...
Jules quickly pulled away, and kept her eyes closed as she tried to catch her breath. She felt Will's forehead rest softly on the side of hers, and everything she told herself earlier was completely gone from her memory.
She opened her eyes slowly and smiled as she was greeted by Will's sparkling blue eyes.
It's not humanly possible for someone to have such blue eyes. It's just not.
"That was nice." Jules said with a smile as she felt her fingers wrap through Will's.
"Yeah, it was." Will said simply. Before she knew it, Will was leaning in once more, and she quickly put her arms out to stop him.
"Wait, Will..." She immediately felt bad as she saw a look of hurt and despair wash over his face. "I just want to tell you that..."
"What?" he asked immediately.
Jules didn't know how to say it without sounding completely crazy.
Yeah, so Will...I know I've only known you for what? a day or so, but yeah, I'm definitely falling head over heels madly in love with you, but there's one problem. I'm a raving lunatic who has let my past three boyfriends control my life and stomp all over me.
Definitely won't work.
"Nevermind," Jules said leaning in once again for a kiss.
"No, what were you going to say?" He asked as he pulled away this time.
Jules scratched her head and looked off into the horizon. There really was no need for her to be scared, and worst of all, express her fear to this incredibly sweet guy who really liked her. She was just letting the memories of those bastards that ruined months and months of her life control her even and. And why give them the satisfaction?
Now I have to tell him. Sh-t. I'm an idiot. I can never just enjoy life the way it is. I always have to bring up the past. The painful past, at that. Why can't I just move on?
"Jules, what's up?" Will asked, now concerned.
"Will, This is going to sound completely and utterly insane, I know, but just please bear with me. I can't help it, I'm a Vaughn, we're crazy people. It's in our blood."
He's smiling! Good sign.
"If this is about you leaving in two weeks I don't--" Will started, but was cut off by Jules.
"No, it's not that. It's not that at all." She responded promptly.
"Then what is it?" He asked, somewhat confused.
"Okay, I know you're a sweet guy..."
"Oh God," Will groaned, covering his eyes with his hands, "the kiss of death. You don't even need to continue. Wait, I thought we hit it off pretty well, didn't you?"
He's so adorable... Jules thought to himself as she laughed. She reached up and pulled Will's hands off his face and held them in her lap.
"No. No no no no no. I really like you, Will, but I just wanted to let you know that--I guess you could say that I've had more than my share of bad experiences in relationships. And I'm not saying we're in a relationship, we have only been on one date but--I just don't want to have to deal with the crap that I've dealt with in my past again. Am I making any sense?"
Will sat in silence for a moment, then stood up and ran a hand through his hand through his hair.
"Well then, I'm going to get out now because I'm an absolute jerk and will only treat you like crap." Will said solemly as Jules's eyes widened. "Bye Jules."
Will walked past Jules as she sat there, tears threatening to spill out of her eyes. She tried desperately to say something, but the words wouldn't come out of her mouth. She sat in shock and almost screamed when she felt someone's breath on her neck.
"Yeah, you definitely are insane." She heard Will whisper in her ear. Jules turned around right away and pushed Will onto the ground with all her might.
"You--" she said, trying to sound angry, but failing when her laughter drowned out her words as she fell on top of Will.
"So violent!" Will joked, as he held her wrists and she rested her chin on his chest. "Yeah, I think we've clearly had enough drama for one night and it's getting pretty cold. Let's get some coffee or something."
"Sounds good." Jules said, grinning wildly as she stood up.
~~~
Vaughn's Apartment
Michael turned his head, letting his eyes rest once again on Sydney's sleeping form. He just couldn't take his eyes off of her.
Okay, so I've slept for an hour or so after we "did the deed"...Yeah, I'm not really that fond of the term "sex" or "making love." I just think it's stupid to try to label this unworldly experience with one word or one phrase. It's inexplicable. And it should stay that way. Especially when it comes to Syd. I've always known I love her, but I guess it takes experiences like this to realy understand the magnitude of it all.
Not just the love. And yes, pardon my sappiness, I'm a tad out of it. Just the magnitude of everything. Maybe Jack is right. Maybe this is too dangerous. Because I do have to admit, after experiencing that, I definitely have a bias. And all of my reasoning completely flies out the window when it comes to her.
Can we really work this out? Form some sort of system where we can actually see each other? Be around each other without putting our lives and the lives of our loved ones in danger?
Sydney's eyes slowly began to flutter open. Michael smiled as Sydney looked at him and placed her hand over his face.
"You've got a little stubble forming, now don't you?" Sydney teased rubbing his face.
"You like it?" He asked, kissing her hand.
"I must say, it's quite sexy," she replied, grinning as she snuggled against his chest.
"I'll have to shave less often then," he said as she stroked her hair.
"How long have you been up?" Syd asked with a yawn.
"Awhile," Michael said grinning. He knew he'd been up for the last hour or so staring at her, but there was no way he was going to admit it.
"I'm kinda hungry," Syd said, yawning as she sat up and pulled the blanket around her bare self. "What time is it?"
Michael reached over the bed and turned the alarm clock towards him. He laughed as he read the time.
"It's ten."
"You've got to be kidding me." She replied laughing. "I guess we did have quite an evening."
"Yeah, I guess so," Michael joked, as he reached over the bed for his boxers and slipped them on. "And I'm thinking we still have time to make our night pretty memorable also."
Sydney rolled her eyes and pushed Michael playfully as he stood up.
"Do you really think you've got that kind of luck?" She asked, reaching down for her underwear.
"Clearly, you've never seen me hit the tables at Vegas. My luck is unparalleled. Seriously." Michael walked over to his closet and pulled out a pair of pajama pants and put them on over his boxers.
"Boo!" He heard Syd call from the bed. He smiled over to Syd as he tossed a pair of boxers and a t-shirt her way.
"Yes, yes, I know I have an amazing body and you would love to watch me parade around in nothing but my underwear, but I have this thing about walking around in my boxers." Syd laughed as she pulled the shirt over her head.
"And what might that be?" She asked, clearly amused.
"It's too drafty."
Syd rolled her eyes but couldn't supress her laugh as she made her way over to Michael. He reached back into his closet for a t-shirt, but she grabbed his hand before he could do so.
"What?"
"I like you like this," Sydney replied with a grin as she ran her hands over Michael's abs and up his chest. His eye brows rose as he noticed the glint in Syd's eye.
"What am I, your own personal Chippendale guy?"
"Yes." She said adamantly, wrapping her arms around his neck.
"Okay, cool." He replied, letting his hands settle on her waist.
"You're really strange, you do realize that, right?" Syd asked, laughing at his response.
"Yeah. And right back at ya." Michael retorted before leaning in for another kiss.
~~~
Outside Starbucks
"So what kind of 'relationship' troubles did you have to deal with that made you get so strange on the beach?" Will asked as they left the Starbucks.
Jules sighed as she reached the car.
"Trust me, you don't want to know."
"Oh no, trust me, I do want to know." Will said teasingly as he opened the door and sat down.
"Seriously, it wasn't pretty. Let's just leave it at the fact that I thought I was in love many-a-time and was basically left heartbroken because of my stupid naive hopes."
"Wow, that sounds pretty bad," Will said, more serious now.
"Yeah, it was," Jules replied sadly. "And I'd rather not talk about it. Or them. No wait, those things. I'd rather not talk about those things ever again in my life."
Will laughed at Jules's sudden stubborn tone.
"Okay, sounds good to me."
"But I have a better idea," Jules replied, grinning, "why dont you tell me about that little crush you had for Sydney."
"Umm..Uhh..." Will stuttered nervously.
"Wait, let me just say that you are so cute flustered and nervous. And, also, I don't think it's humanly possible for someone to turn the shade of red that you're turning right now."
"Let me just say that you're the only girl that wants to hear about her date's past crushes."
"Well, its more complicated when it comes to you, because your past crush is my brother's girlfriend and my soon to be close pal." Jules said matter-of-factly.
"Oh, and that makes it so much more less embarassing for me." Will replied sarcastically.
"Uh-huh. So speak."
"It was stupid. I had a crush on her ever since we were in college, but she never really saw me as anything more than a friend. She had Danny...They were engaged even. But when Danny died, I felt like I had the responsibility to be there for her. We got drunk one day, I kissed her, and basically made a fool out of myself for the following days, weeks even. By the time I found out the truth about her, I realized that she didn't need me to be acting like some stupid love-struck teenager around her. She needed me as a friend. And that's what I had to be for her. A friend, and nothing more."
"Awww," Jules said mockingly. "Now that wasn't too hard was it?"
"It wasn't a matter of being hard, it was a matter of being incredibly embarassing."
"It wasn't embarassing! It was cute!"
"Okay, if you calling that cute isn't embarassing, I don't know what is." Will said, smiling. "Plus, she loved Michael, so I was kind of out of the picture anyway."
"Is that jealousy I sense?" Jules joked, poking him.
Will smiled genuinely and looked over at Jules for a brief moment before looking back at the road.
"Only because he gets to see you so often."
Jules blushed as she smiled and tilted her head towards Will.
"You're the king of cheese, you do realize that, right?" She asked, leaning over and placing a kiss on his cheek.
"Of course."
END CHAPTER ELEVEN
