Chapter Twelve - A Step Away From What is True

I've seen suckers lose themselves in the games
They learn to play
Children love to sing but then their voices
Slowly fade away
People always take a step away
From what is true
That's why I like you around
I want you

"I Want You," Third Eye Blind


Jules walked into the apartment, sighing as she tossed her jacket onto the couch. She made her way to the sink to grab a glass of water when a note with her name on it caught her eye. She moved towards it and picked it up suspiciously.

Jules--

I hope you had fun tonight -- But not too much fun. I've got the bedroom for the nigth so I left your stuff on the couch. Hopefully you won't mind.

Love,
Mike

PS: Oh, and by the way, don't come in my room unless you want to be scarred for life.


Jules shook her head, and despite the voice in her head that was screaming for her to be grossed out and angry, she couldn't wipe the dopey grin off her face. It had been a long time since she'd felt this way for a guy. Come to think of it, when she had, she had her heart trampled over...

I can't get too attatched...Just think of it as a fling. I'll only be here for the next couple weeks or so, and then I'll have to go back to Boston. Back to my old life. Without Will.

What am I talking about? I'm making it seem like we've been dating for months or something. This won't be hard. He's a sweet guy but it's not like he's my soulmate or anything...

But how am I supposed to find out if I only have two weeks. It's not fair. What if he
is the one? The man that I'm meant to spend the rest of my life with, but I'm just going to blow it off...

Okay, yeah, I'm definitely going crazy and I need to calm down. Soulmates? Marriage?

Breathe, Jules, breathe.


Suddenly, the door to Michael's room slowly squeaked open. Jules looked up from her position by the counter and watched as her brother walked out of his room with a sparkling smile stapled to his face.

"Oh God, please don't begin to describe anything." Jules joked, rolling her eyes.

"Ha ha, real funny. I came out to check on you," Michael said, jumping up onto the counter. He pulled a box of cereal towards him, opened it up, and tossed some into his mouth.

"In case you forgot, Michael dearest, I'm actually 29. I don't need you to check up on me."

"Well clearly you do seeing that you just snapped at me. It may have been a Jules snap, and therefore was sickeningly polite, but it was a snap nonetheless. So how was your date? And don't say good just to protect Will from the ass-kicking of the century."

"No, that's the thing. The date was perfect. Absolutely perfect." Jules repled dreamily as she walked over to the couch and plopped down on it.

"Then what's the problem? I just realized that you are an incredibly tough nut to crack, Juliana Vaughn," Michael responded, jumping off the counter and heading over to the couch. "You're like a walnut or something." He said under his breath as he sat down beside her.

Jules couldn't stop herself from laughing.

How did such a nerd get to be so popular with the ladies?

"You're not much of a peanut yourself, brother." Jules mocked, leaning her head on the back of the couch.

"But really, Jules. What's up? Why are you so distressed? If you're worried about Will, I was just kidding about kicking his ass...he's a good guy. I know him. He'd never do anything to hurt you. He's not anything like--"

"Just stop, Mike." Jules snapped immediately. "Just stop."

Michael looked across the room then turned his head back towards his sister.

If I had been back in Boston when all this sh-t was going on in her life, it never would have happened. I'm telling you, it wouldn't have. She says she hates my overprotective nature, but look what happened when she didn't have me there to protect her...

"Mike, I know what you're thinking and you can't always be there to protect me and 'shield me from harm.'" Jules said, shaking her head. "You're my older brother, yes, but that doesn't mean you have to feel like you have this God given duty. How do you expect me to grow into my own self if I don't experience things like that."

"I see what you mean, but obviously, it's been months since you broke up with him and you still haven't gotten over it. He treated you like crap, Jules, and you didn't have to take it."

"Mike, please, not now..." Jules pleaded, resting her face in her hands.

"Okay, okay," Michael replied, wrapping an arm around Jules's shoulders. "Now tell me what's really on your mind."

Jules sighed and buried her face into Michael's shoulder.

"I don't know, Mike. I just don't know. I was really happy and excited when I came home, but then I got around to thinking..."

"That you'll be leaving in a couple weeks." Michael finished Jules's sentence.

"Yeah, and I really like Will, I really do. But I just started thinking, what if this is the guy for me? What if I was meant to come here and fall in love with him and--"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop right there." Michael said, pulling away from Jules and looking her in the eyes. "Falling in love? Jules, don't you think it's--"

"Well, not really falling in love, per se..."

"You've only been on one date with the guy!" Michael exclaimed, standing up. "Jules, you can't set yourself up for heartbreak like this."

"Okay, just forget I even said anything." Jules whispered loudly as she marched towards the bathroom. Michael caught her arm and shook his head sadly.

"I'm sorry, Jules. I didn't mean it like that. What I just mean is..." He tried to find the right words. He didn't know Jules was always able to do it; give the perfect advice and always be supportive. Or not always, but almost always. How she was able to always know what to do, yet always hit these strange obstacles within herself. "Why do you have to go and fuss about this now? You have two weeks, maybe even a little more to spend with the guy. Get to know him, figure out if your intution is really right...if you do really love him. And once it's all said and done and there's no way you could possibly leave him behind and go back to Boston, we'll figure out a plan of action. Until then, enjoy it. Because you don't know how long it'll last."

Michael looked down at his feet, then over to his door. Jules smiled, and put her hand on his face, turning it back towards her. "Thank you, Mike. For once you actually had something insightful to say. I don't see it happening again any time soon. And don't worry about it. You'll find a way. You've always been able to, before. What should stop you now?"

She's obviously never met the beast that is Jack Bristow.

"Yeah," Michael replied smiling also. He shook his head then looked back up at her. "So everything's good?"

"Everything's good." Jules said with a grin. "Now go back and don't be too loud becase I will seriously consider burning my ears off."

Michael gave her an 'Are you out of your mind?' glare, and she just laughed.

"I kid, I kid."

Michael glared at her one last time before he made his way back to his room.

"'Night, Jules."

"Goodnight, Mike."

He softly closed the door behind him and slowly crept towards the bed, making sure he wouldn't wake Sydney up. As he crept back into bed, Syd turned towards him in her sleep and nuzzled her face in his chest.

"You're an amazing brother, you realize that, right?" She asked tiredly, her warm breath sending chills down his spine.

"Those ears of your's are damn good." Michael said, laughing. Syd lifted her head with a grin spreading across her face.

"What can I say...You were talking pretty loud."

"I'm sorry--"

"Don't be." Syd responded. "Don't be." She settled back down into her prior position and started to close her eyes as Michael spoke.

"Yeah, I know I am."

"You know you're what?" She asked.

"An amazing brother." He replied simply. She laughed and smacked his arm. "What?! I am..."

~~~

The Next Day

"Hey, Syd, where have you been?" Francie asked just as Syd walked through the front door.

"Oh, Hey Fran!" Syd exclaimed as she took her jacket off and placed it on a chair beside her bag.

"Don't 'Oh, hey Fran,' me. Will told me all about your little rendezvous with that Michael of your's from work..." Francie responded devilishly.

"Oh, he did, did he?" Syd replies, shooting Will the death stare.

"Indeed he did. And you're going to be telling me all about it...But later. I have to head out to the restaurant now."

"What?! But you just came back!" Will complained, taking a bite of his cereal.

"I know, I'm sorry honey. I'll be back a little later though." Francie picked up her jacket and keys and practically raced out the door.

"Oh man, that restaurant is really eating up her time, isn't it?" Will asked, turning his attention back to the newspaper in front of him.

"You...You..." Syd said accusingly as she pointed a finger in Will's face.

"What?" He asked with a grin. Syd rolled her eyes and sat down on the stool beside him.

"How was your date?" She asked tiredly. She had to admit, she liked the fact that Will and Francie both knew. There was nothing to hide anymore. Alteast that's what she figured. And as long as Francie doesn't go around opening her big mouth...

"It was amazing, Syd. Amazing." Will replied, beaming.

"Really? Amazing, huh?" She had never seen Will this happy...atleast not in a long time. She liked it.

"Jules...She's like...Oh man. I don't even know what she's like. All I know is that she's unlike anyone I've ever met..."

"Oh, thanks." Syd quipped sarcastically.

"You know what I mean..."

"Yes, of course!" Syd said, walking towards the fridge. "Where did you guys go?"

"The carnival." Will answered laughing.

"The carnival? Will Tippin, you are one smart man. You know the key to a woman's heart. Excellent choice for a first date. Excellent."

"Why thank you."

"And then what did you do...?" Syd asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Well...We went to the beach..."

Syd gasped and clutched her heart dramatically.

"The beach?!" Will couldn't help but laugh as he saw tears froming at the edge of Sydney's eyes. "She's a lucky woman, Will."

"Well, she was actually the one who asked to go down there..."

"Oh. Then scratch that. You're a lucky man."

"Trust me, I know." Will said, turning back to his cereal. "I think I'm going to see her again tonight..."

"Awesome!" Syd said, pouring some milk into her own bowl. "Be sure to check with me before you make a fool out of yourself, fashion-wise."

"Hey! I take offense to that! I pride myself of my personal-style." Syd laughed and rolled her eyes mockingly.

"Well, I'm glad you had a good time," Syd added, turning serious.

"Yeah, I am too," Will replied, nodding. "I--"

All of a sudden, Syd's cell started ringing.

"Oh God, don't tell me that son of a bitch, Sloane, wants you to go back to work." Will said exasperatedly.

Syd picked up her phone and read the number.

"No...It's my Dad...Excuse me." She stood up and made her way towards her bedroom. "Hello?"

"Sydney. Meet me at the warehouse, right now. This is urgent."

"What happ--" Before she could ask any questions, Jack hung up. Frantic about what might have happened, Syd put on her jacket in record time and grabbed her keys. "Sorry, Will, but I have to go. I'll be back a little later."

~~~

At the Warehouse

"Dad, what happened? What's going on? Is everything alright?" Syd asked desperately as she ran into the warehouse to meet Jack.

"No, Sydney, everything is not alright." He responded, shaking his head.

"Wha--What happened?" Syd asked, out of breath.

"Sydney, I know you have been intimate with Agent Vaughn, but it needs to sto--"

"This is what you called me here for?" Sydney was fuming. No, fuming is an understatement. "You say it is urgent, you say it is an emergency, and this is what you call me here for?"

"Yes, Sydney. Because this is an emergency. You're practically throwing your life away and you don't even care--"

"No, I'm not going to discuss this with you." Sydney called out as she turned around and began walking towards the exit.

"I already talked to Agent Vaughn..."

"You what?" Sydney asked, turning around.

"Yes, I saw him leaving your house the day after Christmas. I thought atleast he would understand the absurdity of this all. What danger you're putting yourselves into. Secret covert affair...Going to each others houses with barely any precautions. You've practically signed your death certificate. But no, he kept talking about happiness. About how you both were happy and how 'that's all that matters.' He doesn't seem to realize that 'being happy' does not matter in the life we live. You learn to deal with it, because it's the only way you will survive."

Sydney sat in front of her father, staring at him intently. Her look of curiousity slowly changed to burning anger.

"You were spying on me?!" She exclaimed angrily.

"You asked me t--"

"No, I didn't ask you to confront Michael. I didn't ask you to butt your nose in our affairs. I asked you to take care of secruity section for one day, one day so I wouldn't have to spend Christmas alone. I'm not going to live a sad and lonely life, like you Dad, just because of my fear. I'm sick of being afraid to love, Dad. I'm not going to let Sloane control every little part of my life anymore. I'm a grown adult and I can take care of myself, I don't need your help. Or advice for that matter."

"Sydney, I know you don't mean that."

"Like Hell."

Jack sighed and looked up towards Sydney.

"You may not care about what I have to say now, but let me just say it. You're life is never going to be perfect. You will never go riding off into the sunset with your knight in shining armor and live happily ever after. You're life isn't going to be a Cinderella story. At best, it'll be Romeo and Juliet. At best."

Jack turned around and walked towards the exit.

"I'm not going to lose my daughter because of her own stupid naivety. I can't lose another person in my life, Sydney."

Once Sydney saw that Jack had left the warehouse, she fell into a heap on the floor. She felt her face scrunch up and she knew the tears were flowing but couldn't feel them. She didn't care about any of that...She didn't want to live a perfect life. She just wanted to be normal. For once in her life.

Maybe Dad is right, she thought as she pulled her cell out and dialed, There's no way this can end well. No way. No matter how hard we work to hide it, we'll never be safe.

"Vaughn."

Oh God.

"Meet me at the Warehouse." She says simply, in tears.

"Sydney, are you al--"

Click.

Syd sat there in silence for the next twenty minutes. The only sound that could be heard throughout the whole warehouse was the sound of her uneven breathing. She couldn't stop crying and she had no idea why. She could always stay in control. Always. Why did that change now?

No matter what she told herself, nothing seemed reasonable. Nothing seemed safe. Everything was wrong.

It felt like she had waited an eternity when she finally snapped her head up and saw Michael jog into the warehouse. She stood up and felt the sobs wrack her body as he walked through the chain-link fence.

"Sydney? What's wrong?" He asked, pulling her into his arms.

The words couldn't come out of her mouth, so she decided to just let it out. Let all the pent up anger and frustration and fear and everything...just let it all out. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she could feel him rubbing soothing circles on her back and whispering things in her ear.

I can't give this up. I won't. He's wrong...He's wrong...

Slowly, her breathing steadied, and the tears started drying up. Michael gently pulled her head off of his chest and looked into her eyes.

"Sydney, please tell me what's wrong. You're scaring me."

"My Dad...He..."

"Did he come to see you?" Michael asked, the realization suddenly hitting him.

Afraid that the tears would start to spill out once again, she simply nodded her head.

"Dammit. Don't listen to anything he says, Sydney. He has no idea...No idea..."

"But Michael..."

"No buts. If he just saw, for one second, the look on your face...How happy you are when we...He just has no idea, Sydney."

"Michael, how will we--"

"We will find a way. We will work something out. And I swear I will not let anything happen to the two of us. Nothing."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Sydney," he said tiredly as he sat on a crate, "life isn't easy. You have to work to get what you want. Sometimes some people have to work harder than others. Just because it'll be a little tough doesn't mean we should just give up altogether. We have a connection unlike anything I have ever experienced, and I'm not going to just throw that away. I love you, Sydney."

"I love you too, Michael," Syd sighed, crying once again as she wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shirt. He gently lifted it up and wiped the tears off her face.

"Just please don't cry. I can't stand to see you like this. It takes a lot for you to actually do this, and I don't want to be the cause of any of your pain."

"Never," she placed her hands on his face and held it for a moment. "You'd never be the cause of any of my pain. Ever." She rested her forehead on his, and before they knew it, their lips were on each others.

Michael slowly pulled away and wiped the fresh tears off of Sydney's face.

"What is this?" He asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Uhh...Tears of joy...?"

END CHAPTER TWELVE