Chapter Two
The hosptial has pratically
no patients in it, yet everything seems to be in a whirlwind. Atleast on our floor. Lucky us, we get to have the CIA
agent that just happens to have some unknown virus that could very well kill us
all and, oh yeah, did I mention that Elliot is still lusting over this
man?
She put on a fresh set of scrubs, applied ungodly amounts of makeup, and put
her hair up in one of those plastic clippy things and
now she's trying to seduce him. She's trying to seduce a man who's on the verge
of death, who quite franky, isn't all that gorgeous,
when she has a Greek God of a man named John Dorian standing only feet away.
When will she ever learn?
"Can I get you some new pillows, Mr. Vaughn?" She asks in her
bubblegum sweet voice. I think I'm getting a toothache just listening to her.
She might as well wear a sign that says "Hi, my name is Britney, what's
yours?"
**Daydream**
Elliot turns from her position by this man's side and strikes the typical
Britney pose, raising her chin and letting her hand rest on her hip.
"Oh baby, baby. How was I supp-osed to
know..." Mr. Vaughn sits up and she pushes him back down onto the bed and
comes my way. "That somethin' wasn't ri-i-i-ght. Oh baby, baby, I shouldn't have let you
go-o..." Did I mention how hot she looks in the naughty school girl
outfit?
Naughty, Elliot, naughty!
"Show me, how you want it to be, tell me baby--"
**End Daydream**
"Dude, I'm not gonna lie, you're creeping me out
standing here singing "Hit me Baby One More Time" and doing that wierd-ass dance you do."
Oh, Turk, you know you love it.
I stop quickly and pretend like nothing happened. Okay, so I totally forced
that daydream just so I could imagine Elliot in that hot outfit, but it
was sooo worth it.
"Hey, Turk, what's up dawg??" I
stick my hand out and me and Turk do our classic secret handshake, ending of
course with the slamming of our chests together as a show of our utter
masculinity.
"I heard about what's going on with this CIA agent. How crazy is this?!
We've been in our residency for God knows how long at this hospital, and never
once were we enlightened by the fact that it's a CIA hospital. That's damn
cool. We so have to tell all our friends that we, ebony and ivory, salt and
pepper, chocolate and vanilla, have treated a CIA agent. Dude, my dream
when I was a kid was to become a CIA agent."
"Please do go blabbing your mouths off to everyone, little ones, because
I'd ahab-solutely love to see a hit put out on
you guys so that I'd never have to see your grovelling
babyface, newbie, and that hideous mole on
yours Captain Turk."
Wow, that was harsh. I don't think Dr. Cox has ever told me he actually wanted
me to disappear off the face of the Earth before. Okay, wait, he really has,
but not in the getting killed sense. He always had sweet insinuations that I'd
be taken away by aliens.
And the aliens, I imagined, would of course look like J.Lo
and would serenade me and give me lap dances all day and night til they couldn't shake those huge asses of theirs anymore.
Glorious.
Before Turk or I could speak up, Cox was gone again.
"What's going on with this guy must be really serious, Dr. Cox seems more
ruthless than usual." I say to Turk as we turn our backs and lean against
the counter.
"Man, could we really die?"
Just as I am about to flip a sh-t and freak out all
together about the utter terrifying-ness of the situation we are currently in,
the doors fly open and the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life
floats through the doors. She has that heavently glow
about her, and I'm pretty sure there are little baby birds carrying the tail of
her coat with their beaks so it doesn't hit the floor.
Awww, baby birds!
I snap my head back up as the woman approaches us. Oh sweet jeebus.
"Michael Vaughn...I need to see Michael Vaughn." She says, clearly
distressed.
Oh, baby, let Dr. JD heal your boo-boo. Where does it hurt...Just tell Dr. JD
where it hurts...
"Uh he ah yah uh ummm yah..." Me and Turk
babble incoherently, and the woman standing before us...the sole woman who
embodies all that is good and pure in this world...looks like she wants to bite
our heads off.
"Where. Is. He?" She says, more sternly this time. Me and Turk just
keep babbling...I'm trying so hard to stop, I really am. Dammit,
JD, MAKE SENSE!
All of a sudden, Carla walks up, slaps both of our heads, causing our mouths to
shut (thank God) and she steps behind the counter. "Maybe I can help you.
Who are you here to see, again? We aren't allowing any more patients or
visitors, unless you have clearance."
She pulls out her wallet from her jacket and flashes her CIA identification
card.
Dude, I WANT ONE!!!
**Daydream**
"Yeah, I'm CIA, jackass," I flash my card and shove it in his face,
"now give me the kegs..."
"Weeeee! Turk! Lookie
what I got with my new card!"
**End Daydream**
"My name is Agent Sydney Bristow, and Agent Michael Vaughn is my
handler." So that's the Sydney he was mumbling about. Damn.
Carla looks at the ID, then hands it back to her. "Right this way."
She says, leading her to who I've now dubbed 'da man'
seeing that women are flocking to him despite his verging on unconcious state.
"Dude, I'd sooo handle her," I laugh
and turn to Tod, who of course is being his usual
perverted self, "if you know what I mean! Score!" Oh you horny,
horny, surgeon. He sticks his hand up and gives me and Turk his trademark high
fives. "Now if you'd excuse me, I'm off to summon the sentimental Tod who can provide a troubled woman with a shoulder to cry
on and headboards to shake all night long." I gotta
say, I could really do without the gyrations. But whatever float's his boat.
Me and Turk turn around to watch the scene playing out with Mr. Handler and his
hot agent. Carla brings Elliot to us, and we all sit around and eavesdrop,
essentially. What we do best, of course.
"Ha, that Sydney doesn't have anything I don't have..." Elliot
mutters under her breath.
"You just keep telling yourself that, sweetie," Carla says, patting
her shoulder sympathetically.
Sydney walks up to his bed and stands there, staring at him sadly. I never
found myself to be the sentimental-type, but I gotta
say, this sight tugs at JD's heart strings.
**Flashback**
Kate loves you, Leopold, she really and truly loves you. Why else would she
travel through time just to be with you?!
**End Flashback**
Okay, maybe I am just a bit sentimental...
She pulls up a chair and takes a seat beside him. There's a box of laytex gloves by his bed, and she pulls out a pair and puts
them on. Finally he stirs, and shifts his head to look at her.
"Hi," he says softly, but warm, like they may perhaps have more than
just an 'agent-handler' relationship.
Does it seem like I'm narrating a soap opera here or something? Because I'm
pretty sure it feels like that. What the Hell, I've always wanted to be in the
soaps...
"Hi," she responds, taking a deep breath, then pausing for a moment.
There is so more to this relationship than what meets the eye.
"Ten bucks says they're dating." Carla says quietly.
"Nah, I say they want to be together, but can't because of CIA
protocol." I say, getting into it.
"I'm with JD on this one," Turk adds.
"Ten bucks says she's a slut." Elliot quips bitterly. We quiet up
again as she starts to speak once more.
"I talked to my mother, there's an antidote. I'm gonna
go get it." She says, her voice filled with sadness.
Antidote? This CIA sh-t is wayyy
too creepy for my tastes.
"How dangerous?" He asks, clearly having difficulty speaking.
"Getting the serum? Nah it'll be easy..." She pauses and they stare
into each other's eye and it's like there's some unspoken declaration of love
taking part, but no one can hear it. Thus the unspoken. "But i need to take some of your blood with me, okay?"
She reaches over and preps his arm for the needle.
"Uh, should you be letting that woman take that man's blood?" I turn
my head and lucky me, the janitor is hovering over me like the frightening ogre
he is.
"Shhh," I say, waving my hand, trying to
get the point across that I want him to shut the Hell up so I can keep
eavesdropping.
"Did you just shush me?"
"Yes, now go!"
"She doesn't look like a doctor. Therefore, I don't think she should be
taking this deathly ill man's blood. But what do I know, I'm just the janitor."
"Yeah, you are, so shut up and leave." I immediately regret my words,
for I know this has just sealed my fate. A month or two of complete and utter harrassment by the one man I try to avoid all contact with
the most. Wedgie ala Janitor, here I come.
"I'm not gonna forget this," he says as he
walks away, and points at me angrily. "You're gonna
regret the day you ever met me."
Trust me, I already do.
I turn eagerly back to the scene that's playing out before our eyes.
Aww, they love each other so much! He better
not die. Oh God, I will do all I can to save this man because if I have any
duty in life, it's to allow two gorgeous people like them (fine, I admit it,
the man is a hottie...Thank God I didn't say
that out loud) to reproduce and populate this world with more gorgeous people.
"In a couple of days you'll be doing windsprints."
She says, placing the vial aside. He looks deep into her eyes once more, and
this time takes hold of her hand, and pulls it close to him.
"Be careful."
God, I wish I could get a woman to look at me the way Sydney is looking at this
Michael Vaughn guy. She looks down at their clasped hands and places her free
hand over his and strokes it soothingly.
Am I tearing up? Oh God, please tell me I'm not tearing up...
I quickly wipe the tears away, then feel less embarassed
as I see that I wasn't the only one. Turk, Carla, and even cold, heartless
Elliot were affected by this little exchange.
Why, oh why can't I have a Sydney who'd hold my hand and tell me I'd be
running windsprints in a couple of days? Oh yeah, I
don't run...
That I'll be channel surfing like a pro in a couple of days?!
Life isn't fair, I'll tell you that.
"Syd, I'm sorry I'm so tired," he pratically whispers, turning his head away and slowly
closing his eyes. Oh no, this can't be good. Sydney stares at him intently, the
tears flowing freely now, and she just continues to stroke his hand.
Suddenly, all the machines connected to him begin to go off, and Dr. Cox,
Carla, and a couple of other people run up to him.
"VAUGHN!" Sydney exclaims as she jumps up and backs away from the
bed.
"He's bleeding internally. Call Kelso, we're heading up to the OR."
Dr. Cox says seriously as they roll 'Vaughn' away.
Carla stays behind and Sydney runs up to her.
"Wait, wait, wait, what's going on? Is he going to be alright?"
Sydney asks frantically.
"We don't know, but you have to wait here. They told me to tell you that
your designated cover is that you're with the State Department's Bureau of Arms
Control. Your name is Rita Stevens. Give no details about his illness."
Sydney wipes her tears quicky, and as she turns
around, she's approached by a petite blonde with short hair. Eh, I give her a 4
out of ten. She ain't all that, and a bag of chips.
Hey, that saying is so still in.
"Who's she?" Elliot whispers.
"I don't know..."
"Excuse me? Did they tell you anything?" The blonde woman asks,
frazzled.
"No." Sydney responds, hiding her emotions very well given what state
she was in only moments before. I guess that's what they teach you at Spy
School.
"The paramedics called...They asked me what his last meal was and if he
was allergic to any medications...I got to the hospital as fast as I could. So
you work with Michael?"
Oooh, Michael. Not Vaughn. Family member maybe? Or,
dare I say...GIRLFRIEND?
"Yeah, we're in the same bureau at state. I'm Rita."
No, you're not, silly girl! You're Sydney! The nymph sent from above to take me
away from this Hell hole so I can live a life filled with sex, sex, and more
sex. With you of course. Ha, Rita...
"I'm Alice. I'm listed as his emergency contact...I'm Michael's
girlfriend."
All three of us gasp at this sudden realization, and I couldn't help but speak
up...
"Dayyyum."
END CHAPTER TWO
