Tobias

This was bad. This was very bad. Jake's parents were next in line to have their heads stuck down a Yeerk Pool. I just kept on going over in my mind how Jake must be feeling. It wasn't fair to him that he was the one that had bad things happening to him.

I was on my way flying to Cassie's when I spotted Marco and Rachel on their way there. They reached the gate where Cassie was and I found my perfect opportunity to tell them all at the same time. I flew down and perched on the gate.

"Hi Tobias," Rachel smiled at me pleasantly. Any moment I would have loved that smile, but right then I was frantic. Jake seemed homicidal to me when I left him and that probably wasn't the best way to end a day.

((Guys, we have a problem,)) I said, quickly. ((It's about Jake.))

"Is he alright?" Cassie said worriedly.

((He's alright for now,)) I said. ((The Sharing is holding a dedication thing for Tom and his parents are going.))

"You're kidding me," Marco said angrily. "How's Jake?"

((How do you think he is?)) I asked, sarcastically. ((We need to find a way to get his parents out of this or we've lost our fearless leader for good.))

"The barn is the closest, safest place to morph," Cassie said quickly. "Come on."

The three of them raced back to Cassie's barn and I flew off to tell Ax. When all four of us were in the sky, I explained to them how Jake had acted and what I thought he meant by that quote.

((It doesn't mean he's going to kill everyone at the Sharing,)) Cassie said, nervously.

((No,)) Marco agreed. ((But he's heading down that path.))

((Guys, we need to do something quickly,)) I said.

((About what?)) Rachel asked.

((About Jake,)) I explained. ((Look these series of events, they have to be happening for a reason. It's like someone is trying to destroy him mentally. Once he's down mentally, there's no need to destroy him physically.))

((Yeah, and without him there's no Animorphs,)) Marco said. ((Let's face it, Jake isn't exactly the best strategic person around, but he leads us into a fight and he gets us out again. Nobody else can do that as well as he can. No questions asked.))

((He is a true prince,)) Ax said proudly. ((I am very much honoured to serve him.))

((If Jake were here, he'd tell you to be quiet Ax,)) Rachel laughed.

We neared Jake's house. What were we supposed to do when we got there? I hadn't planned anything out. Were we supposed to comfort him? Give him advice? Tell him we'd always back him up? Tell the leader of our group what to do? Nobody was going to enjoy this.

Jake's window was still open when we reached his house. We all flew in to his bedroom. He was at his desk going through papers. He turned around and watched us demorph, with the exception of me.

"Okay, Jake we're here," Cassie said, the first one to demorph. She hurried over to him and gave him a hug. He didn't repay the favour.

((What are those?)) I asked him, indicating with my beak to the papers on his desk.

"These are reports of known controllers," he said.

"You have reports on known controllers?" Marco said as he became fully human. "What are you with? The CIA?"

"It's good to know who we're dealing with," Jake shrugged. "Besides, I might need to take advantage of their weaknesses."

We all exchanged looks.

"Jake, what do you intend to do?" Cassie asked apprehensively.

"I'm not about to let them take my parents, Cassie," Jake said.

((We're not going to let them,)) I said, solemnly.

"Yeah," Jake laughed, it wasn't a humorous laugh; it was more of a sardonic laugh. "Just like I was going to save Tom, right?"

"Jake…" Cassie started, but Jake cut in.

"Look guys," he said. "I appreciate this, I really do, but I've already told my parents I'll be there and I don't need back up on this."

"I think you do," Marco said and then he gave Jake a look. Something had happened that only they knew about, something that had made Jake look bad as a leader. "You're not thinking straight. You could expose us."

"I'm not going to expose us," Jake said, shooting Marco a look back. "I know what I'm going to do."

"I'm going with you," Rachel said, as if the conversation had ended. "I am Tom's cousin after all."

"You don't want to go for Tom," Jake snapped. "You want to go so you might bring down some Yeerks."

"Isn't that what you want?" Rachel shot back. "Look at you, Jake," she said. "You're turning into me."

"What?" Jake laughed. "I don't think so."

"Jake, listen to me," I could hear the sincerity in Rachel's voice as she spoke. "You don't want to become like me, you don't. You don't want to become a ruthless killer. You have a conscious. I lost mine a long time ago and look what I've become. I need this war for the killing. That's who I am now. I don't want you to become like me," she sighed. Jake had lost his humour and refused to look at her, but she continued. "You're a good person, you're an in control person. That's why you're our leader. I could never be leader because I'm not calm, I don't look for the right way to go about things, and I take the easy way out, because I'm ruthless," she paused and I looked at her. She wasn't crying, or smiling, she just had this painful look on her face. "Jake, do you want to know why I made that offer to you? I didn't make it to you so you could become more like me; I made it because I wanted…I needed you to stay as our leader. I thought that would be the one reason why you would stay. I was wrong. I've seen the damage I've caused and I want to stop it. I don't want you to become the person I changed to when this war started," she took a breath and looked around her. She looked at me and I cocked my head, urging her to go on. Jake needed to hear this.

"Listen to me, cousin," she said, coming closer to Jake, who still refused to look at her. "You're not me. You're a good person. You've always thought of other people before yourself. But you're turning into me and it's scaring us. Don't punish innocents for this. Because in the end you're only going to hurt yourself. You'll never be able to live with yourself. I can handle it, you won't be able to."

She finished with a sigh as though she was relieved. I flew over to her and perched on her shoulder. She stroked my feathers. I looked around. Jake was still sitting at his desk, turned away from the rest of us. Marco was sitting on his bed, acting as if he heard none of Rachel's speech. Cassie was standing the closest to Jake, watching him with concern. Ax was standing in a corner, face expressionless.

"Is that it?" Jake asked coldly. "Are you finished with your speech?"

Rachel nodded. I don't think we've ever seen Rachel as emotional as she was these couple of weeks, but it certainly was a change from her cold self.

Then from downstairs we heard a shout. It was Jake's mum, telling Jake to get downstairs so they could leave. Jake shouted his response.

He got up and opened the door, but before he left he said, "I don't want you there."

We were left there. Utterly bewildered with Rachel's speech.

"I'm going," she said.

"What?" Marco said, mockingly. "You've snapped back into Xena mode now?"

"Shut up," Rachel snapped. "You know I only said that for Jake's benefit."

((One thing you're right about though, Rachel,)) I said. ((Jake is turning into you.))

"There's a scary thought," Marco said softly, as secretly we all thought the same thing.