Disclaimer---- Me lazy. Me no disclaim. Me get arrested. Ouch.
AN- Hi…. (blink) hisashiburi da ne, minna! I was considering for a while that maybe I'd just kind of… leavethe storyoff there… but then… I really wanted to do some more, so I'll see how much I can churn out. Yay!
As for my most recent reviewer, Animegirl13… As sweet as your sentiment is, I did mention the time that passed in my bio, and from what I can remember, you can't post an author's note by itself on this site. Additionally, if you really cared, you might have reviewed the story more often before…?
Whatever. I'm just slightly bitter. Omataseta ne… gomen!
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koko made no arasuji (story thus far)
Hiei is free as a bird, free to fly through Shuuichi's house, which he now occupies. No more issues with his abusive dad, no more worries… or are there? After all, Shiori wasn't big on this whole adopt-a-delinquent idea, and she herself is dying…
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Dinner at the Minamino residence even a week after Hiei's arrival was unusually subdued, with all three "family" members harboring their own secret worries- Hiei, terrified of making a bad impression, Shiori, thinking of the added cost he would bring and a doctor's appointment earlier that day, and Shuuichi, only just beginning to realize what he had asked his mother to do for him.
"So, Hiei," Shiori began tentatively. "Do you have everything you need?"
"Umm… yes. Thank you," he added as an afterthought.
"I gave him the blanket and the pillow," Shuuichi reported dutifully. "He said he can sleep on the floor for now." Those words he regretted instantly, as the implication of discontent in the statement became clear.
"Yeah, it's fine," Hiei said quickly. "I really don't care, and it's nice of you to even keep me here anyways…"
Shiori nodded. "Do you have homework, Shuuichi? You do remember that you still have school tomorrow."
"No, we don't have anything."
There was a scraping sound as Hiei pushed his chair back and stood up. "Umm… I'm finished… it was very good… Where should I put the plate?" He jerked his head in the direction of the aforementioned china.
"You can set it by the sink for now."
He did so, walking out with an apologetic expression on his face. "I have some problems to do for math. I didn't get to finish them in class."
Shuuichi stood up halfway. "Do you need me to help?"
"I'll try them myself first." He tried to smile a little to avoid coming off as an ungrateful, self-confident idiot, the gesture nevertheless seeming to him a bit forced.
"Okay!"
Shiori waited until Hiei was gone and the door to the room closed before she spoke once more. "You know I had a doctor's appointment today." Her voice was filled with a forced calm.
"Yes." He had taken special care to remember this time. And though he dreaded the answer to his next question, propriety demanded it, and he had a duty as her son to know. "Any news?"
"It's spreading faster than they expected." She swallowed hard. "The doctors think I may not make it to see you graduate from high school. There are some things they can do, you know, to hold it off for a few months, but there's no way we can afford it."
The statement hit him with all the force of a bullet through the heart. "If… Hiei weren't here…"
Her face softened. "It wouldn't matter. The kind of money they're talking about is an amount we'd never be able to come up with."
He shook his head, refusing to accept her words. "What about the money for my schooling? Can't we use that? I've seen the bank statements; it must be able to cover most of what you would need."
"No, Shuuichi."
"But…!"
"No! Shuuichi, look at me!"
He did so unwillingly, emerald eyes beginning to fill with bitter tears.
"You are not giving up your entire future for something that might not even work. Do you understand me? This is my choice. I choose to die knowing that you can pay for university rather than live wondering if you'll even be able to stay at Meiou." She smiled, a smile so convincing that Shuuichi began to wonder how many other times she had lied to him with that smile. Had she never stood a chance against her illness in the first place?
It hurt him to doubt his mother, but he was seeing more and more how much she wanted to protect him.
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Why is it that humans placed into terrifying situations react with denial? It seems a strange adaptation, one that costs valuable time and destroys the mind's ability to come up with a solution to the supposedly nonexistent problem. Yet on the other hand, the side that is opposite yet the same, it is a method of protection. We think more clearly in the absence of panic. Perhaps denial is a chance for the subconscious to evaluate the situation.
Still, it is a curious balance, one that could fall in any direction. Though it could be argued that, after a point, the truth and lies are only a matter of perception.
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"What took you so long?" Hiei asked curiously.
Shuuichi rubbed his eyes, wiping away the last vestiges of tears. "Talking to my mom." The sentence, choppy as it was, was all he could force out under the circumstances.
"Something wrong?"
"No."
Okay, so he was clearly lying. Only someone in denial would answer so quickly and so succinctly. This much Hiei knew, despite his tragic lack of experience in the realm of human feeling. "Umm… you know you shouldn't bottle it up, right?"
"Yeah, you're a shining example of THAT one. Can't you see I don't want to talk to you?"
"No, I can't, because you won't tell me that anything's wrong!"
"Just leave me alone."
"Fine. I'll be sure to stay on the far side of my little rug over here."
There was a long silence, during which Hiei sat down, arms crossed, mentally beating up his uncommunicative roommate.
After a few more minutes, Shuuichi's repentant face appeared over the edge of the bed. "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to yell at you. Are you mad?"
"Are you going to tell me what your problem is?"
"Ummm…"
"Then I'm mad. Horridly mad. I will curse you and your spawn for seventy-three generations."
When Shuuichi didn't show any sign of amusement, Hiei uncrossed his arms and stared the redhead straight in the eyes. "Come on, aren't you going to tell me what's wrong? I mean… Aren't we friends?"
"My mom's sick."
"Yeah, I think you told me before."
"Well, they'd been saying that it was just something she'd have to live with, but that she would actually live with it, you know, but today they did some more tests, more accurate ones, and now…"
"How long do they think…?"
He didn't answer for a moment, trying to collect himself, willing himself not to choke on his salty tears. "There might not be anybody there for me when I graduate."
"I… I'm sorry," Hiei whispered, the words of consolation sounding foreign to him. Then again, as a virtual orphan, he'd always found Shuuichi's relationship with his mother to be special. It was rather surreal that one of the most important days to both of them might be spent alone.
"I guess it had to happen one day. I just didn't want to believe it… I still don't want to. Any second now, I wonder if the doctors will call back and say they messed up the results. I don't want to be by myself."
"Hey, you won't be by yourself. I'll be there, won't I?"
He blinked in surprise, then felt a shadow of a smile flicker across his face. "Yeah!"
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That's the chapter… I apologise profusely for being late… Actually, I wrote the whole thing in one sitting, which took about an hour, which isn't so bad. Maybe my writer's block was psychological.
Please review… I love all of you! (Minus you people who don't show appreciation through reviewing. Does it really take that long to leave a short comment?)
