Instinct: an inborn pattern of behavior characteristic of a species and shaped by biological necessities such as survival and reproduction; a powerful impulse that feels natural rather than reasoned.
Instinct
Teyla was late to the debriefing, but they waited for her. She entered the room on crutches and stopped at the first available seat. Rodney pulled it out for her.
"Thank you, Dr. McKay."
"You're welcome."
Dr. Weir smiled at Teyla. "Shall we get started?"
At everyone's nod she continued.
"Now, please tell me what happened on your mission to PGP121."
Silence.
"Anyone?"
McKay spoke up, "We went through the Stargate ….."
Sheppard didn't want to hear it. He'd lived it, wasn't that enough? He looked at the pad of paper in front of him and picked up the pen. When nothing came to him immediately, he began to tap the pen on the table. He could hear the low murmur of Rodney's voice, Ford added something and then Rodney continued.
Sheppard glanced down the table at Teyla and sighed. He was in love with her. He'd come to the realization this morning while he watched her sleep, and it scarred him to death. She was a friend, a good friend and a trusted member of his team. If they became romantically involved things would change, but if they didn't…… Sheppard shook his head. He wasn't the type of person to suffer in silence and just the thought of seeing Teyla with someone else was more than he could handle. He really didn't have a choice.
"Major Sheppard?"
His pen stopped, Sheppard looked up at Dr. Weir, "Yes?"
"Would you like to pick up the story from there?"
He frowned, "From where?"
"Lt. Ford said that Teyla went over the cliff and that you jumped after her."
Unwanted memories flashed across his mind. "I caught her or she caught me, I'm not too sure which. Ford and McKay pulled us over the cliff and I carried Teyla through the gate."
"Did she land on a ledge or-?"
"No, there was nothing there except about a one hundred and fifty foot drop."
Dr. Weir looked around the room. No wonder they were so subdued. To watch someone you know go through such a horrible experience while you struggled to save them had to be a nightmare.
"I spoke with Dr. Beckett and he tells me that Teyla will need a month, at the very least, to recover from her injury. I am also taking you three off duty for two weeks. All of you will have at least two sessions with Dr. Heightmeyer. We'll play it by ear from there. Please turn in your reports by the end of the week. Are there any questions?"
Silence
"Then you're dismissed."
Sheppard was nervous. He'd reasoned from Teyla's response to his kiss that she would be open to the idea of becoming more than just his friend, but he could be wrong. What if she said no? Sheppard could feel the panic tighten his chest making it difficult to breath.
Teyla stood on the balcony facing the doorway, "What is it that you wished to speak of Major?"
Sheppard smirked, "John."
She smiled softly, "John."
Sheppard watched as the last rays of the setting sun surrounded Teyla, her hair blew gently in the breeze, and her eyes sparkled. "God, you're beautiful."
She dipped her head hiding a blush. Sheppard stepped closer and placed one hand on each side of her face, tilting her head back. He gazed into her eyes. "I want you to be mine."
Teyla's brow knotted in confusion.
Sheppard explained, "My girlfriend, my companion, my mate." He watched the emotions cross Teyla's face.
"Are there not rules among your people about such things?"
He slowly nodded, "Yes there are, for me, they don't apply to you."
She chose her words carefully, "Why now?"
He sighed, "Because I………….When you went over that cliff, I thought that I………"
Sheppard closed his eyes and rested his forehead against Teyla's, "I can't loose you." He pulled back and looked into her eyes, "I need you."
She smiled, with her eyes, her face, her whole body.
Sheppard smiled back, "So are you willing to give us a try?"
Teyla slipped her arms around his waist and gave a gentle squeeze, "Yes."
One Week Later…….
Nice and easy. If Sheppard never heard those words again he'd be more than happy. He and Teyla had talked about their relationship. They'd both agreed that for now, it would be a good idea to keep it to themselves. They'd also agreed that take things slow physically. And at the time he'd agreed whole heartedly, and the next day, and the day after that. It wasn't until the conversation where Teyla told him that she was still a virgin that it had become an issue. He'd taken it all in stride. True, he'd been a little surprised, but deep down a part of him enjoyed the idea of being the one to introduce Teyla to the joys of sex. His body, on the other hand, had developed a mind of it's. He was fine as long as he didn't see, hear, touch, smell, or think about Teyla; which meant that he was basically screwed. Ha, irony in a word. To make matters worse, it seemed as if he still had trouble sleeping unless she was with him, which caused a couple of damned embarrassing mornings. All because of three little words.
Sheppard gave a long sigh.
"Will you stop that?" Dr. McKay complained.
"Stop what?"
"All of that sighing. You sound like a love sick cow."
Sheppard smirked. "You should talk."
McKay was confused, "What is that supposed to mean?"
Dr. Beckett, Lt. Ford and Major Sheppard all looked across the lunch table at McKay and laughed.
"Oh Elizabeth," Sheppard began, "you hair is so clean."
Ford added, "Your teeth are so white."
"Your breath is so fresh." Ford and Sheppard looked at Beckett and cracked up.
"Oh, shut up! I say no such things."
"You don't have to Rodney it's written all over you like a bad tattoo."
McKay looked at them as they nodded their heads in agreement. He closed his eyes and sighed.
"Who's the love sick cow, now?"
McKay had a dilemma. If everyone else could see that he had feelings for Dr. Weir, it was only a matter of time before she realized it herself. He had two choices; he could start pursuing her or he could wait for her to make the discovery and see how she reacted. The thought of waiting drove him crazy. After all, he was a man of action. Wasn't he? McKay sighed. Okay, so maybe not a man of action, but self preservation told him to act now, and he agreed. The only problem was deciding what to do.
McKay paused outside of Elizabeth's office. Here goes nothing. He walked in.
"Dr. Weir, I have a report on the Ancient memory device that we found in the chamber with the 'truth chair'.
McKay looked up from his file. "I was wondering if you……"
Dr. Weir's face was pinched in pain.
"Elizabeth?" He approached the desk. "Are you alright?"
Dr. Weir rested her thumb on her temple and brushed her fingers across her forehead hoping the pain would go away.
"I'm fine Dr. McKay, it's just a little tension headache."
"Have you been by to see Dr. Beckett?"
"Yes, he gave me some medicine, but it doesn't seem to be working."
McKay snorted. "That's because you push yourself too hard."
Weir looked up at McKay, his face showed his concern.
"You know," he said, "if it really is a tension headache what you need is a massage."
Weir smirked, "The next time you run into a masseuse, you let me know so that I can schedule an appointment."
McKay was quiet for a moment. "I know someone who can help you."
Weir looked at McKay amused, "Really, on what planet?"
"Actually they're right here on Atlantis."
She was intrigued, "Who?"
"Me."
"You?"
McKay smiled, "Would you like for me to give it an 'ol college try'?"
"I don't know Dr. McKay?"
"Oh, come.. There's no harm in trying and besides it will give me something to do while I tell you about our discoveries."
Weir sighed, she had to try something. Her neck was stiff and her head was pounding. What harm could it do?
Weir smiled at McKay, "Alright."
McKay swallowed. She'd said yes. Him and his big mouth. Give it an 'ol college try'. College was well over fifteen years ago and that was about the last time he had given his lab partner a neck massage. Well, you're stuck now buddy, deal with it.
Dr. Weir noticed McKay's hesitation. "Rodney if you don't feel comfortable I'll understand."
"No, no I'm fine. After all, I did suggest it." McKay laid down his file and walked around the desk behind Weir's chair. "Just sit back and try to relax."
Elizabeth sat back in the chair and closed her eyes.
"Now, the device that I mentioned earlier, we're been calling it the 'memory prompter'. It's very similar to the device that the Tok'Ra uses to recall and amplify memories, but this device is a bit more sophisticated. You can actually see a visual image of the memories and record them to a……….."
Elizabeth dropped her head forward and sighed. She was in heaven. The deep timbre of his voice was soothing. Initially, Rodney barely touched her, but now that he was concentrating on his report, his hands had a life of their own. They were nice hands, strong but not rough, firm but not pinching. She could slowly feel the tension melting away.
Elizabeth thought about Rodney. The Dr. McKay she'd met when she first arrived in Atlantis would neither have noticed nor cared about her pain. But this Dr. McKay had stood beside her when the Genii invaded the city and fought with her to defend Atlantis against the Wraith. He had changed, and in his place stood a stronger, more caring man. Thought he could still be abrasive, Rodney was slowly becoming a charming person. She smiled. Her Rodney was growing up.
Elizabeth tried to clear her mind. She focused on the slow circular movements from the warm hands on her shoulders. She breathed in deeply and let out a long sigh. The shiver that slid down her back caught her by surprise.
"Uh,….Dr. Weir?"
Elizabeth's head flew up and McKay's hand froze.
Sgt. Bates stood in the doorway. "I'll come back later."
He turned and left before Elizabeth could find her voice.
"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea."
"On the contrary Dr. my headache is gone. As for your report, is it possible for us to finish discussing it later?"
"Sure, would you like for me to come back here?"
She shook her head, "No, too many interruptions." Weir turned to McKay, "Would it be okay if I came by your room later on this evening and we finished it then?"
McKay contained his joy. "Sure, how about seven?"
"Seven is fine. I'll bring dinner."
"Seven it is then. I'll see you later." McKay came around the desk grabbed his file and headed for the door.
"Rodney?"
He turned, "Hhmm?"
"Thank you."
McKay smiled, turned and walked out of the door. He'd save his happy dance for later.
McKay glanced at his watch, seven thirty seven. He was beginning to believe he'd been stood up. Well, might as well eat. Rodney sighed as he walked to his mini fridge. His hand was on the handle when the door chimed. His door slide open to reveal a very weary Dr. Weir.
"I'm sorry I'm so late. I was in such a rush to get here that I forgot to get dinner. Do you think we could reschedule?"
McKay noticed the thumb at her temple and the fingers brushing her forehead, it was a telling sign. McKay stepped back from the doorway. "Come in."
Elizabeth raised her brows in question.
McKay grabbed her by the arm and pulled her through the door. "First, I'm going to feed you and then I'm giving you another massage."
"You don't have t-."
"March." McKay stood back and crossed his arms giving her a stern look.
Dr. Weir smiled and walked into the room.
Teyla lay on the bed with her arms at her side.
"The object of this little exercise is to see how much you trust me." Sheppard smiled at her from where his head rested on her abdomen. "Now, close your eyes and relax."
She did as he asked. The room was silent. She felt the feather light kiss along her ribcage. Sheppard spread his hand across her stomach. Teyla heard the pop of her waistband and the gentle tug of the zipper. She grabbed his hand, "John?"
He met her eyes. "You trust me don't you?"
"Yes."
"Then relax."
Teyla closed her eyes; she could feel his gentle kisses moving down her side. She sighed. This was the man that she trusted with her life and her heart, so she relaxed and let him have his fun.
