Chapter 2: Little Kurt
"It's the circus, nobody will know it's not a costume."
Margali hadn't expected much to change with her newly enlarged family; after all she had raised both Stephani and Amanda on her own. When the circus stopped to camp for the night after the fire, she named her new charge Kurt. It seemed only fitting since the strongman had rescued them both. Kurt, the quintessential gentle giant had blushed when she told him, but took it as an honor. The child was passed around from performer to performer and all agreed that once they got used to him, he was pretty cute.
The new Kurt quickly became quite a sensation amongst the troupe. Since they had all played some part in pulling him from the burning house there was the general consensus that he was not Margali's child, but theirs. He was mentioned so often in conversation that he was designated "Little Kurt" while the Strongman became "Big Kurt" so not to confuse anyone.
But at the end of each day Little Kurt slept in Margali's trailer and she loved him like one of her own. That didn't stop her wondering exactly what she had gotten herself into. She was worried when he didn't seem able to sit up like other babies his age, but this fear was quelled the day she found him "perched" with his knees bent double and his hands on the floor. His unique hands and feet made him adept at climbing and it seemed that he learned to crawl and climb on the same day. Of course there was his tail, which he used as kind of a counter balance making him the fastest crawler that Margali had ever seen. And he was nocturnal.
Much to Margali's relief Kurt slept most of the day, allowing her to work as a fortuneteller while he napped in a covered bassinette beside her. The downside of this was that he was up most of the night. This was fine at first; during the night she would find him awake in his crib, sucking the tip of his tail, looking at her with wide yellow eyes that glowed like a cat's when the light hit them. When he saw her he would stop, grin toothlessly, and reach out with his little hands. Margali would occasionally oblige by picking him up and carrying him to her bed so he could curl up next to her.
Once he learned to climb and crawl however, those peaceful nights ended. Margali and her children often woke in the morning to find that things had moved during the night, usually toys and books scattered about the floor but sometimes things like silverware and plates. Margali thought it was Stephani or maybe Amanda at first but they insisted that they slept through the night. The only other reasonable culprit was Kurt, but that was impossible. He couldn't possibly climb out of his crib at night, at least not without being heard. And so the family blamed each evening's mischief on "the mysterious nightcrawler".
The mystery lasted until Margali, during a bout of insomnia watched in amazement as Kurt slowly pulled himself up, climbed up the bars of his crib, and then climbed down the bars head first, using his tail like a rappelling device. He dropped gently to the floor and crawled over to the children's' toy box. He turned around and when he saw her sitting up in bed, smiled, crawled over and leapt into the bed like a cat.
Margali stifled a laugh. Kurt really was the nightcrawler. The name stuck even when he graduated to "night walker" status.
When the show was over and the public had gone home a common sight was that of Big Kurt strolling through their campground with Little Kurt perched up on his shoulders. He was small for his age but far more agile than he should have been. He knew all the performers by name and would greet them in their own languages. When he saw Margali he would leap down into her arms wrapping himself around her in a giant hug. Everyone thought it was cute, but Margali was wondering how much longer it would be before he became too heavy to catch.
He had been raised collectively by the circus and so he was welcome in every tent and trailer. His unique abilities made him popular with the roustabouts when it came time to raise or lower the tents. Kurt would scale the poles and thread the ropes for them. Margali would shut her eyes, he looked so tiny way up high, but he always made it back to the ground safely.
Kurt was so precocious that Margali worried about her other children feeling left out. She tried to make sure that each one of them knew that they were just as special. Amanda didn't seem to care and often followed Kurt around the grounds, sharing in the attention. Stephani, Kurt's elder by nearly four years, didn't admit to jealousy but she had seen him glaring at Kurt's antics more than once. Kurt never seemed to notice however and Margali was pleased to see that whenever the two brothers were together, the animosity melted away. In fact, the three of them played so raucously that she was forever kicking them out the trailer so they could raise hell outside.
And so life went on like that for several years. They traveled around Europe doing shows during the summer and spent the winters in the south training and doing an occasional performance. The circus was like a large nomadic family, working and living together and within that family Margali had her own. As they got older, she delighted in the way each one of her children found their own identity. Stephani showed little interest in performing or circus work but read everything he could get his hands on and even talked about going away to school. Amanda, Margali noticed was beginning to show an aptitude for magic. She'd expected this; women were naturally magical particularly those in ther family. Kurt was fascinated by the acrobats.
Circus Gehlhaar's acrobatic and aerialist troupe was another family within the circus family. They were from Sweden and they called themselves "Lycka på Himmelen" which meant "bliss in the sky" in Swedish. There were 9 members in all: a husband and wife with a son and two daughters, plus various cousins. They were all blonde with pale skin and fine features. Kurt watched every practice perched in the top row of the stands. Their youngest son, Lars was his age and he was beginning to learn the trapeze. Kurt was wild with envy. He had been up on the platforms, had even helped hang the trapeze rigging, but he was forbidden to climb or swing on them.
Everyday, when it was Lars' turn to practice Kurt watched him swing out and back and out and back while his father controlled the safety harness he wore. Then Sven, Lars' cousin would swing out and catch Lars by the wrists so that Lars could release the trapeze with his feet and swing to the other platform. Kurt was sure he could do it too.
He devised an elaborate plan. If he was to learn the trapeze with Lars, he would have to get the troupe's attention first. While the family practiced, he quietly left his usual seat and snuck along the side of the tent until he was at one of the diagonal ropes that was anchored to the ground to support the high wire platform. After testing its strength Kurt slowly inched his way up, gripping the scratchy rope with both his hands and his toes. Kurt hated shoes and only wore them when it was too cold to go without.
At the top of the platform he looked down. The trapeze rig was just below him, he had planned to walk out on the high wire, leap off of it, turn a forward somersault and catch the trapeze below him. He would then use his momentum to gracefully swing to the platform to everyone's amazement. He'd seen it in his head so many times, but now he was having second thoughts.
The high wire, which always appeared so thick coiled on the ground, looked suddenly very very narrow. Kurt took a tentative step on to it and then another. In order to keep his balance he had to take another step and then one after the other until he was out in the middle between the two platforms. He stopped and tried to balance himself using his arms and his tail but it was impossible. He had intended to time his jump carefully to insure that there was actually a trapeze to catch, but his body pitched forward and when he swung his tail around as a counterbalance he went over backwards.
Kurt hardly had time to get his bearings and when he looked down, Sven was swinging forward, ready to be caught by Papa on the opposite trapeze. He yelled a warning before colliding with Sven in midair and wrapping his arms around him. At the same time Kurt caught the trapeze that Sven had just left with his tail and the two of them were pulled backwards. For a split second Kurt thought everything was going to be fine, but Sven was too heavy. His tail loosened and the two of them fell into the net in a tangled heap.
"You could have just asked." Sven said.
The acrobats, now accompanied by Margali were standing in a semi circle around Kurt who sat rather than perched on the lowest row of seats with his tail hanging down limply behind him. Kurt glanced at Margali who had her hands folded across her chest and he nodded miserably.
"You or Sven could have been injured." Papa said. "That would have been very bad for the circus." Kurt stared that the ground, wishing he could disappear.
"Well?" Margali said.
"I'm sorry." Kurt said for what seemed like the fortieth time.
"No, ask your question." Margali said.
"Oh." Kurt said quietly. He looked up at Papa and cleared his throat, suddenly nervous. This wasn't how he had imagined it at all. "I was thinking that, um if you're teaching Lars, that um, I could learn too." He returned his gaze to the ground.
Papa shrugged and looked at Sven. "Do you want to teach two boys instead of one?" he asked.
"I don't see why not." Sven said.
"It's hard work." Papa said. "And only if your mother agrees."
Kurt looked expectantly at Margali.
"You have to promise you'll listen to them and do what they say." She said.
"I promise."
"And you'll have to practice, even when you'd rather be doing something else."
"I know." Said Kurt, but the truth was that he couldn't imagine wanting to do anything else.
"And no more climbing to places where you don't belong." Margali finished.
Kurt sighed. "Okay."
"Then you can do it." Margali said.
Kurt grinned and hopped up on the balls of his feet before leaping into Margali's arms and nearly knocking her over. He thought he'd never stop thanking her, but he finally pulled himself together and put his feet back on the ground before Margali dropped him.
"Ow."
"Hey!"
"Well, you shouldn't have hit me."
"It was an accident. Don't pull my tail."
"Watch out Amanda."
"Lars, stop it."
"I said leave my tail alone!"
Margali put her hands to her temples and massaged them, then she took a deep breath. "Enough!" She shouted.
The sound of four children playing in too small a space stopped abruptly and they looked at her expectantly.
"Go outside." She said.
"But it's raining." Amanda said quietly.
"I don't care. Play in the big tent then. But don't get in anybody's way."
Margali watched the children put on their coats and hats. Stephan slid the lorry's side door open. "Oh and Kurt…"
"Yes?"
"No more than six feet off the ground."
Kurt sighed. "Okay," he said in mock exasperation and followed the children out the door.
"Finally." Margali said. She got up to slide the open door closed to keep the heat in. "Sorry Annika, they were driving me crazy."
Annika Olsson laughed. She was Lars' mother and one of the four women in the Swedish aerialist troupe. She waved her hand at Margali as if to brush her worries aside. "I get it worse than you" she said. "There are usually nine people in our trailer whether they live there or not."
Margali laughed and picked up her cup of coffee. Annika followed suit and the two women enjoyed a moment of silence, sipping coffee and watching the rain.
"So?" Margali asked after few minutes.
"Oh, of course." Annika put her cup down. "I came to talk about Kurt."
"He's not causing you any trouble is he?" As he had promised, Kurt arrived on time to every practice and would come home exhausted. Margali could tell he was working hard, but his carefree attitude about nearly everything could be trying.
"Hardly. Just the opposite, in fact. He's doing very well. We'd like him to perform with us."
Margali had been about to take a sip of her drink. She put the cup down. "But it's hardly been two months. And he's not even seven years old yet. And there's well," Margali paused, "the way he looks."
"He's got all the basics down and even some more advanced things that the kids don't usually do until they're a little older. He'll have turned seven by the time we play. My first show was when I was eight."
"That's all fine, I mean, I'm pleased. But in front of all those people…" Margali let her voice trail off. She had carefully kept Kurt from view of outsiders. Within the circus community he was safe, but she had seen what fear could do. She didn't want to risk it.
"You can't hide him forever. And he's a wonderful aerialist, a natural. He could be a great performer. And his appearance could be an asset if it was presented the right way. It's the circus, nobody will know it's not a costume." Annika was leaning across the table. She had watched Kurt during practice and she had seen it in his eyes. He wanted this. He had grown up with performers and had picked from them ability and desire to direct attention his way.
"When?" Margali asked.
"At the end of the winter we play the carnival in France. It's a few weeks from now. He'll be more than ready."
"And his appearance?"
"We thought maybe a story instead of a straight aerial and acrobatic routine; something to explain his appearance. You know, why he looks like," Annika paused.
"A little blue demon." Margali finished.
Annika shrugged and nodded at the same time. "Maybe a sorceress conjures him. That's what we were thinking anyway."
Margali sat back. Maybe Annika was right. Kurt had somehow managed to grow up blissfully unaware that his appearance was anything but an asset. He had no idea that most of the world would find him frightening rather than cute. But someday he would learn the truth about how the world really was and it would only get worse. A child with pointed teeth and ears that had a tail was far less threatening than an adult with the same features. Perhaps it was time to introduce the world to Kurt on Kurt's terms instead of theirs.
"If he wants to, he has my permission."
Annika smiled. "I know he will." She said. She got up. "I'll let him know at practice tomorrow." She said. Annika paused at the door. "Should I send them back in?" she asked.
Margali shook her head. "I'm enjoying the quiet." She said. She watched Annika leave and leaned back in her seat. She had never meant to become a mother, and yet she loved her three children deeply. But the only one she ever worried about was Kurt. She had been so careful to keep him out of sight for so long. She hoped she had made the right decision.
