THE HERE AND NOW
The beauty and genius of a work of art may be
reconceived, though its first material expression be destroyed; a
vanished harmony may yet again inspire the composer; but when the last
individual of a race of living things breathes no more, another
Heaven and another Earth must pass before such a one can be again.
-William Beebe
I am in the darkness once again, where I belong, thought Juna to herself, as she floated naked and alone in the black void, staring down once more upon the Earth, a blue-and-white marble amidst the white pinpoints of the stars. She felt placid and peaceful, weightless and free. Gone was the warmth of the blood dripping down her side, the coldness of the air around her, the dull pain of her mauled body shutting down bit by bit...
Do you really belong here? came another voice. She spun around to find Chris Hawkins, once more wearing his characteristic blue bodysuit, his blond hair floating away from his face as he shared the vacuum of space with her.
Chris! What's going on?
What's going on? The powerful telepath floated down and held up a blue apostrophe-shaped stone in front of her. This is what's going on, he said. I am making you choose again, Juna.
Juna clapped a hand to her forehead and found it smooth-surfaced. That was the Drop of Time he was holding in his fingers. I... what do you mean?
Chris sighed. Choose, Juna. I can let you die, and you can find the peace you seek. Or, you can choose to remain the Avatar and continue your stay on Earth.
Juna reached a hand out. I never forgot I was living on borrowed time ever since you gave me the Toki no Shizuku. She clasped Chris' hand in her own. I choose to continue. My promises I keep.
It will not be easy.
And how is that any different from the life I lead today?
Chris looked at her with admiration in his eyes. You do learn! Come. You have a long road to recovery, but I have no doubt you'll manage it somehow. They are tying you down now in your gurney because you're on the verge of jumping off it...
Chris?
Yes?
I know the Toki no Shizuku was what saved me from the bomb. Will it work now? It failed me when I needed it. And why are you even bothering to give me this chance? You could just pick someone else to be the Avatar in my place.
Chris floated silently as he composed his answer. Yes, it will work now. And it failed you because you tried to call on it while it was still trying to heal itself from all the damage it had sustained in protecting you from the blast. You must forgive it that. Think of what happened to you as a learning experience. A very painful one, and something not even I would wish to go through, but... well, you know of the saying 'A person's worth is measured by the depth of their suffering,' don't you? At least be glad you are here with me and can choose your fate. Many others who find themselves in your position don't, and are forced to go down the dark valley where all roads meet, will they or nil they. As for wanting you to still be the Avatar... I wouldn't want to let all that learning go to waste, Juna. Chris smiled his crooked smile. It would be terrible of me to do so. And there are so few who can be Avatars...
Juna looked at her mentor. Now I know this has all been a dream. A precious thing, but a dream nevertheless.
Eh? What makes you say that?
You're giving me all the answers. That's so unlike you, Chris.
The TI-1 had the grace to look embarrassed. Well, seeing as how you've been through some rough times—ghostly laughter sounded in the void around them—I guess you deserve some straight talk for once. You're going to need to concentrate your attention on getting well these coming days.
Juna suddenly found the boy-man hugging her. She hugged him back, and was surprised to smell, in place of the scent of sickness and infirmity Chris usually had about himself, a faint fragrance which reminded her of wildflowers in his hair.
------oOo------
Even if the morning seems far
off
Even if the rain pounds down on
me
I'll run right up to you...
-Maaya
Sakamoto, Mameshiba
Juna Ariyoshi carefully picked her way down the disused road leading from SEED's mountain fastness. She was eager to get back to her family and friends. After several weeks, the doctors had finally given her a clean bill of health, and Chris and Miss Wong had all but kicked her out of the installation, the latter saying, "We don't need you just now. Go straighten your life out, then come back here." With much joy in her heart the Avatar had accepted the offer. It only made her struggle back to the land of the living all the more sweet and fulfilling. The days and nights of intense pain forgotten, she filled her backpack with a few things and was out the door, refusing a ride down the mountain, reassuring the doctors and nurses—and Katsunari—that she would take it easy and stop frequently along the trail, and call them instantly if anything became amiss.
On the last leg of the trail, beyond the solitary shrine that marked the end of an offshoot of it, it had begun to rain, so she brought out the windbreaker she had borrowed from Ka-chan and unfurled her umbrella. Through the cold mountain drizzle she spied the two gigantic torii, one black with age and one red, flanking the path where it joined a hardtop road. And, standing just beyond them...
"Tokio! To-chan!"
Skidding and sliding in her eagerness, Juna ran down the mud-slicked trail, to join Tokio Ooshima beyond the torii. For a moment they stood in front of each other, speechless and awkward. She sensed great embarrassment in him, and shyness.
"Juna..."
"Tokio..."
They stopped, looked at each other and smiled.
"You go ahead," said the blond-haired boy with the dark shades.
"No, you," Juna countered. She extended her umbrella over his cowled and jacketed figure. "Why are you here, standing in the rain waiting for me?"
"Because I... Miss Wong called and told me you were being discharged today. I saw you coming down the trail and decided to wait for you here."
Juna nodded. From what she had been told, her unconscious self had washed up on a shore in Chiba two days after the bomb blast, with no shark bites but in severe shock and exhibiting traces of radiation poisoning, with her aura suit blasted off her, her Drop of Time inactive; SEED found out about her recovery through NHK Domestic News and had, using fake 'parents' and documents, surreptitiously retrieved her from the hospital she was brought to, in order to better care for her, and to avoid some potentially embarrassing and possibly fatal questions and investigations. That was almost a month ago, and according to Miss Wong Tokio, upon learning that the organization had Juna in their possession, made almost daily trips from the city just to be by her side.
"Why? Why didn't you want to meet me?"
The smile disappeared from Tokio's face. "Juna, you know why."
Juna nodded; yes, she did know why. To put off the time of reckoning between them... "You could've gone all the way up the mountain, you know. That way you wouldn't have had to get wet waiting for me."
"No. I've had my fill of antiseptics and gowns and that stuff. And I didn't want to see you lying in that hyperbaric chamber anymore," Tokio admitted. "Katsunari not with you?" he asked quickly.
"No. She said she wasn't feeling well, so she's staying for a day or two while she gets herself checked." Juna reached out and removed Tokio's shades.
"Hey, what was that for?"
Juna stuffed the accessory into his jacket's pockets and kissed him. "I missed you."
A million things suddenly intruded themselves into Tokio's mind. He felt the momentary warmth of Juna's lips on his own, and wanted more of that fragrant softness. He stood there uncertainly, watching her expectant face, seeing her pale, rain-dewed skin, the pink flush of her cheeks, her shining dark eyes, and fought the urge to put his arms around her, so near, so near...
"About Sayuri..."
"No. Don't tell me about that now." Juna looked straight into his eyes, drinking them in. How she had missed them. They told her she was home, more than anything else could. "Tell me how you feel."
Tokio snorted. "Why don't you just reach into my thoughts and tell me what I think?"
"Tokio..."
"Alright, alright, I'm sorry." It was a long time before he spoke up again. "I-I never thought I'd see you again..." He threw his hood off, stepped back out of the umbrella's shade, and looked straight up at the gray sky.
"From what Chris told me, I thought you'd choose to die, rather than fight and come back."
Juna gazed lovingly at him, so obviously camouflaging the tears in his eyes with the tears from the sky, and said,
Let others speak
of harps and
heavenly choirs
I've
made my decision
to remain here
with the Earth
if the old grey poet
felt he could turn and
live with the animals
why should I be too good
to stay and die with them
and the great road of the Milky
Way
that Sky Trail my Alnaki ancestors
strode to the last Happy Home
does not answer my dreams
I do not believe
we go up to the sky
unless it is
to fall again
with the rain
"What was that?" Tokio asked, looking quizzically at her.
"Nothing. Just something I read a long time ago." Juna pulled him back under the umbrella. "Silly boy, don't go getting yourself wet. We still have a long drive back to the city. And we still have a lot to talk about."
"Yeah, we do. Juna, I'm so sorry I acted like an idiot towards you..." The words tumbled out of Tokio's mouth. After waiting for so long to utter them, he felt he could perhaps be forgiven for not saying them more formally...
"Hush." She put her finger over his lips. "We will speak of that in time. Right now I'd rather be getting home to Mom and Kaine."
They walked across the road, to where Tokio's motorbike was secreted away under some pines, and after he had wiped the seat clean they got on and started back to Kobe.
"What will you tell them?" Tokio asked as he carefully negotiated the road down the mountain.
Juna wiped away the droplets blurring her helmet's acrylic faceplate. Both of them were getting seriously wet, but a little water never hurt anyone anyway, so they didn't mind it. "Huh?"
"Kaine and your mom."
"That I got separated from Katsunari and Yuuki, lost my purse in the panic, and fell and struck my head and got temporary amnesia during the explosion. Miss Wong's ready to back me up on that with the right documents."
"Geez. I sure hope your parents get taken in by that." There had been widespread panicking and rioting, and some damage had been caused to Tokyo by the nuke, although it was slight and nothing compared to what the city would have experienced had the warhead detonated where it was originally. Then it would have been the third city in the world to experience first-hand a nuclear explosion. Hiroshima, Nagasaki... Tokyo. Only now, because of Juna and Nausicaä's interference, that would never happen. Of course, there was the much-heightened tension in the region and indeed throughout the world to think about, but other heads would take care of that. It was not given to the younger Ariyoshi daughter nor to the eleventh child of Jhil of the Valley of Wind to master all the troubles of their worlds.
Thinking of the wind-rider, Juna went over what Katsunari had told her, that she had received a package postmarked from Koganei the previous evening. In it were two Taira River stone earrings. A scribbled note indicated these were for Juna. The other content of the box... was Katsunari's broken mini-iPod.
Juna hugged Tokio tighter. So the Princess was alive. She wondered if they would ever meet again. As for Sara Nome... Juna had a lot of time, as she recovered, to experience visions that finally explained everything to her conscious self. Perhaps the shaman would find happiness in the stars along with Shin Kudou, far away from the Earth and its miseries. Her tan-skinned visage and intense eyes lingered in Juna's mind, along with her words. Fight for him, then.
"Tokio?" Juna called over the noise of the rain and wind.
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
"What?" Tokio tapped the side of his helmet.
"I said I love you!"
"You're going to have to speak louder! I can't understand you!"
"Oh! Pull over!" Juna shouted.
Tokio heard that, and after he had stopped on the asphalt shoulder Juna quickly pulled him off the bike, yanked off her helmet and his, and, unmindful of the rain, grabbed him by the cheeks and planted her lips firmly on his. They kissed for a long time, both with their eyes closed, savoring the warmth and feel of each other.
"There!" she yelled as they finished. "That's what I was trying to say!"
A slow grin broke out on Tokio's face. His eyes sparkled with mischievousness.
"I'm sorry, but you'll have to repeat what you said. I'm still not quite sure I caught it."
"You idiot! Taking advantage of me so soon!" Juna laughed as she leaned towards him.
THE END
Author's Endnotes: The poem Juna recites to Tokio is Canticle by Joseph Bruchac. Mameshiba comes from the Arjuna soundtrack, and is written by Yoko Kanno.
