A/N: First of all, I don't have a beta anymore, so I'm sorry for the grammar and spelling mistakes in this chap. Second, this chap is dedicated to music4mysoul, who (God knows why) asked me to update. Actually I had already given up on this story, but since she asked, I thought the least I could do was find my old notebook and write this chap.
Re-reading this story I think it should be re-written, but I know it's not going to happen. And for some odd reason it got some nice reviews a while ago, so if anyone could let me know if I should keep it going or just forget about it, I'd really appreciate it.
Chap 06 - Expectations
"And then he asked me out! On a real date! He said he would pick me up at my house, we would go to the movies, then to the diner and we could hang out in the Town Square and then he would walk me home. Of course he didn't say everything just like that, but the words "go out" and "movies" were there!" She paused to breathe, then continued, "Oh, and he said something about picking me up too, and of course I would have agreed if it wasn't for Mama. So I told him everything about Mama Kim and how she could never find out about us going on a date and he said he was fine with it! And that we could meet at the Town Square and then go to the movies! He is so amazing!" Lane finally stopped talking and took a deep breath, a grin never leaving her face.
Rory just nodded and smiled back, "That's good. I'm happy for you", she said, while both girls walked down the street.
"So, are we heading for your house?"
"No, uhm...I thought we could go to Luke's?"
"Sure", Lane paused. "Just for the record, you treat him like trash."
"Who?" Rory asked innocently.
"Jess", Lane answered, even though it was obvious.
"That's not why we're not going home and I don't treat him like that."
Lane looked at her friend increduslouly, "Do we go to the same school?"
Rory turned her face away stubbornly, "He's always provoking."
"Yeah, but not you."
Rory glared at her.
"Well, at least not most of the time. And besides you're so rude with him, no wonder he doesn't keep it quite. You look at him like if he was the devil or something."
She glanced at Lane with a small smile, "He might be."
Lane laughed, "Come on, what's your problem with him?"
Rory turned to Lane giving up, "I don't know...I feel kind of insecure when he is around. Like I don't know how to act around him. He makes me nervous."
Lane just nodded, not wanting to interrupt Rory's confession and waited for her to carry on.
"He is so different from everyone I've ever known. I can't even try to compare him to anyone in this whole town."
"So you like him?" Lane asked tentatively.
"I don't like him. He's just-"
"Different. Yeah, I heard you." She nodded, than added, "I think you have a crush on him."
"I do not!" Rory said exasperated. "I'm just saying he...", she paused, "I'm not even sure about what I'm saying anymore", she said frustrated.
Lane took pity on her friend's denial and put an arm around her shoulder, "It seems to me that you like him but you're afraid to let it show."
"I just think he is interesting, for some odd reason", she relented.
"Okay, so, any chance you'll start treating him nicely?" Lane asked just because - since she already knew the answer.
"Nope."
She pushed open the door and stepped into the market, looking for a school file.
"Hey!", he said from behind her.
She turned around recognizing the familiar voice, "Hi."
Dean stepped closer, giving her a peak on the lips. "I saw you come in and I just thought I should remind you about dinner tonight", he said, smiling sweetly.
"Dinner?" she asked confused.
"Yeah. Me, my family, Taylor and you. Remember Taylor got so excited with our first aniversary and wanted to have dinner with us and our parents to celebrate such a committed young couple?"
She remembered the fact, and how their relationship seemed to be a town festivity more and more each day.
"Yeah, yeah, I just didn't think he'd really go through with it, at the time. But then again, it's Taylor", she said, while choosing a file.
There was a akward silence until Dean broke it, "Your mom is still welcomed to join us at dinner. I know my parents would love to have her and Luke."
"Oh, no. Mom has to take care of some things at the Inn and Luke closes much later. Besides, I don't think it's such a great idea to throw him and Taylor on the same table."
"Right", he paused, "So, we are on for tonight?"
"Yeah. Pick me up at seven", she said, distracted with the colorful files.
"Okay, see you tonight."
She was just finishing fixing her hair when she saw him on the mirror, leaned on her doorway. He was staring right back at her, seizing her perfection with his eyes, though she couldn't tell it.
"Big date, huh?", were his only words.
She nodded silently, not trusting her voice or the words that could come out of her mouth. She wasn't in the mood to fight right now. And even if she was, his eyes were staring her down so hard that she couldn't speak even if her life depended on it.
A moment later the door bell rang breaking their spell and he went to answer the door, while she made the final touches on her hair.
Dean knocked on her open door just to make his presence known and entered her room.
"You look nice", he said, and his words sounded lame and cheap on her ears, but she shrugged them away.
He sat on her bed and she looked at him through the mirror, while putting her earings on. "Did Jess go out?", she asked. She thought she heard him going out after opening the door for Dean and she wanted to be sure.
"Yeah, he didn't say where he was going, though."
She nodded and turned around to face him. Something like a light suddenly came to her mind and she got into a straight position with a small simle, before telling him her idea.
"Hey, what if we didn't go?"
"What?", he looked at her with a disbelieving face.
"To dinner", she said with a hopeful smile. "What if we didn't go to dinner?"
He looked at her as if she had grown another head, "We have to go", he said with a tone that made her feel ridiculous for even asking. "People expect us to come."
"But what if we did something different? If we went somewhere else?"
"What are you talking about?"
"We could skip dinner. Go to the movies or something..."
"It's Wednesday night in Stars Hollow. There is no movie playing or anything else to do."
"Okay, so let's just go somewhere to talk?"
"About what?", he asked, not realizing how worng it sounded.
And suddenly it hurt her. It hurt her to know he was right, they had absolutely nothing to talk about. "So...let's just stare at our shoes?"
"Rory..."
"We don't have to do things just because people expect us to, you know? We don't have to live up to their expectations!", she exploded. She tried to show him another point of view, saying they could do their own thing. But deep down she knew it was pointless. He was too close-minded to accept anything different from what lied just before his eyes.
He took a step closer to her with a worried expression. Not worried about her, but about her behavior. "Rory, what's going on? You're acting strange."
She took a deep breath, knowing tonight nothing would change. She would end up sitting on a table, surrounded by dull people, smiling politely to everyione, only to feel numb inside. If she couldn't be happy, she could at least pretend she was, so other people could be for her.
She took her coat from her bed and put a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it lightly, "Let's go."
After dinner Dean walked her home and they said their goodnights'. She stood on the door step waiting for him to fade in the distance before turning around to open the door, but she didn't enter the house. She needed to walk around and clear her head before letting slumber seduce her. Instead she walked around, wondering through the town until she found herself on a lawn, behind the Inn, with the lake a little further down. She could smell some cigarette smoke but couldn't think of anyone who would be smoking there at such a hour. She walked down the path a little further to find Jess sitting by the lake.
She sat about three feet away from him in silence. She didn't want to fight and she didn't know what else she could say to him.
He misunderstood her and make a motion to stand up and leave, but she stopped him, "You don't have to leave."
He looked at her and then around, sitting down agian. "I thought you wouldn't want me here, after all you're always either telling me off or insulting me. That when you're not avoiding me."
She glanced at him through the corner of her eyes. "Sorry", she said in a timid voice, because she knew she would have to apologize sooner or later.
He nodded, not necessarily wanting to make things difficult to her.
"I didn't mean to be that bitch-y. I just didn't know what else to do", she admited.
"Try treating me like you treat the others", he suggested, between drags of smoke.
"I don't want to do that", was her honest answer.
He was taken aback. He might have suspected she didn't like him, but he didn't think it was really that bad.
She winced at her own words, realizing they didn't sound what she wanted them to, and tried to explain herself. "I mean, I treat everyone well, I'm kind and polite and just everything people expect me to be. But you don't look like one to expect anything from anyone, not even from me. I feel like I'm always pretending to be this perfect girl to the whole town, and for some reason I don't feel like pretending to you."
He nodded, feeling teh weightof her sincerity and finished his cigarette, stepping on it. "Then I prefer to continue being insulted rather than having a nice talk with you", he laughed. And she joined in his laugh, glad to have someone who wouldn't judge her for not being perfect.
"But it would be nice if you could stop the insulting and avoiding thing..." he tried, hopeful.
"I won't promise you anything, but I can try", she smiled.
"Good enough", he said. And it felt nice to hear him, apparently satisfied with so little.
He was about to lit another cigarette when her shy voice startled him, "May I?"
He looked at her slightly shaky hands, motioning for his cigarette. She looked so young, like a child. "Have you ever smoked?", he asked in a neutral voice.
She shook her head from side to side, a little embarrassed.
He smiled a little, "Come over here", he said, patting the lawn on his side.
She sat besides him, still looking insecure and looked at him. He put the cigarette between his lips and lit it up, taking a long drag. Then he took it from his lips and handed it to her. She put it between her own lips and tried to take a drag but started coughing uncontrollably.
He laughed, taking the cigarette from her fingers and patting her back; trying to help her to breath. She glared at him for laughing at her and he shrugged with a smirk and handed her the cigarette again.
"Just try not to breath while you're taking a drag. And let the smoke in for awhile...it helps you relax."
She took the cigarette and tried again while he watched her silently, smirking. This girl had no idea how sexy she looked right now, and he wasn't the one who would tell her.
She let the smoke in and out slowly and then smiled, proud for having done it by herself. Sure, she had his helpful instructions, but still she felt proud. He smiled at her and stroked her hair, because he simply couldn't help it. She turned to him faster than a heart beat, looking at him strangely.
"I think I should go", she said, not offering any other explanation.
He took his hand away from her hair and nodded before she handed him the rest of his cigarette. "Thanks...for everything."
"No problem", he said, shrugging.
He watched her stand up and leave, desappearing in the shadows before returning to his cigarette. For the fisrt time in his life, he could swear it tasted different.
