No ownership of the Hogan's Heroes characters is implied or inferred. Copyright belongs to others and no infringement is intended.

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"But General Burkhalter, these gentlemen that Berlin has sent only speak French!"

Klink was complaining to his superior officer a few minutes later, having sent Schultz out with the officers to show them to the VIP hut and to offer them some food and drink to put Smallwood at ease. It was hard enough having these visitors in the camp at the same time, along with the Gestapo, but then to have no way to communicate with them was an added burden that Klink just didn't know how to deal with.

"Yes, Herr General. Yes, we do have a prisoner who speaks French. But Major Hochstetter has ordered the prisoners confined to barracks…. Yes, sir, I am a Colonel and he is only a Major. But he is Gestapo… No, General Burkhalter, I don't think there are any Gestapo agents at the Russian front…. Yes, sir, I'll talk to Colonel Hogan about it right away. Goodbye, sir." Klink hung up the phone with a sigh and bellowed for his Sergeant of the Guard. "Schultz!"

The door to his office opened and Schultz entered, coming to attention. "Jawohl, Herr Kommandant!"

"I need to you to go get Colonel Hoga—"

Klink cut himself off as Hogan appeared behind Schultz and gave a brief wave. "Hi," Hogan greeted.

Klink rose up from his desk, angry. "Hogan, what are you doing out of the barracks? Don't you know the Gestapo has orders to shoot on sight?"

Hogan gave a short laugh. "Well, they must know that you sent for me, sir!"

"But Hogan, I was just about to get Schultz to—never mind," Klink dismissed through his gritted teeth. "Hogan, I need the services of your Frenchman, Le Beau."

Hogan shifted as if uncomfortable. "Well, gee, Kommandant, I don't know that he'll be interested in doing anything for the Krauts—I mean the Germans, sir. Not after the way the prisoners are being treated while your visitors are here."

"What do you know about our visitors?" Klink asked quickly.

"Not much, sir; just that they must be awfully important or you wouldn't have the Gestapo here, too."

"That's right, Hogan, so it is important that you do as you are told!" Klink insisted. "Now. I need Corporal Le Beau to act as translator for the men who have been sent from Berlin to examine the site the Englander stumbled across while trying to escape. They are from Vichy and only speak French!" He sank back into his chair.

"Oh, that," Hogan answered. "Well, sir, I don't think Corporal Le Beau will do it."

"Why not?" Klink asked, disappointed. "Think of the importance of this discovery to world knowledge!"

"And think of the men, all cooped up in the barracks, longing to see the sun reflecting off the barbed wire," Hogan continued. "Sorry, Kommandant. But he's angry; I won't even ask him."

"Hogan, how dare you," Klink seethed ineffectively. Hogan simply stood quietly. "Very well, then, I will ask him myself." He stood up and grabbed his coat and hat. "Come, Schultz—and, Hogan, you'd better come with us. The Gestapo might not be so short-sighted the next time you sneak out."

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"I told him you wouldn't do it, Le Beau, but he insisted on coming here himself!" Hogan explained as the Kommandant faced the Corporal with his request.

"Oui, he is right," Le Beau agreed. "I have no desire to help les Boches."

"See, Kommandant? I told ya!" Hogan put in. He gave a nearly invisible nod toward Kinch.

"But Louis," Kinch interjected, taking the cue. "The Iron Age is one of the most important archaeological periods we could study! Surely you'd want to be part of that."

Klink raised his eyebrows in surprise. "What do you know about this, Sergeant?"

"Oh, he knows a lot about this kind of thing, Kommandant," Hogan cut in. "His uncle is an archaeologist in… Egypt!" Kinch rolled his eyes to the ceiling, then hoped that no one noticed.

"Really?" Klink breathed, impressed.

"That's right," Hogan confirmed. "And he's taught Kinch everything he knows, hasn't he?" Hogan looked at Kinch and nodded exaggeratedly when Klink turned away from the Colonel.

"Uh—yeah, that's right, Kommandant," Kinch said. "I know a lot of things." He faltered as he tried to think of an example to prove his expertise.

"I tell you what, Kommandant," Le Beau said. "I will help you. But I must have Kinch with me. After all, I know the language, but I do not understand the procedures."

"That's out of the question!" Klink said.

"Oh well, then, that's your answer, Kommandant," Hogan said, turning to shuffle Klink out the door. "You'll just have to report your failure to Berlin. I'm sure they'll understand. Now if you'll excuse us—"

"Just a minute," Klink objected. Hogan stopped pushing. "Very well, Corporal, you can have Sergeant Kinchloe as your aid. But you will be watched constantly."

"Oh, good. It'll be nice to have company for a change," Hogan said.

"Company?" Klink asked. "You don't think you are going as well, Colonel Hogan?"

"Well of course I am!" Hogan said. "You don't think I'd let my boys out in the yard with all those Gestapo men around and not be there to protect them!"

"Absolutely not, Hogan."

"Okay, then," Hogan sighed. "Sorry, Louis, Kinch. You'll just have to take your chances."

"No way," Kinch protested. "Not without Colonel Hogan."

"Moi aussi. No Colonel, no Louis Le Beau."

"Very well, very well! I will expect you three at the site in one hour. Schultz, see that they are escorted out so they don't get themselves shot." Klink turned toward the door, then looked back briefly at Hogan. "Although why I don't just let them put you out of my misery, I have no idea."

Hogan smiled innocently. "Thanks, Kommandant," he said. When the door shut behind Klink and Schultz, Hogan turned to his men. "That's it; we're in."

"Colonel, I thought you just wanted me to play along. I don't know anything about archaeology!" Kinch said.

"That's okay; neither do the Krauts. I just like the idea of more than one person down there when Smallwood gets involved."

"Smallwood?" Carter asked.

"That's right," Hogan said. "Our British stool pigeon is going to land right in our nest, and I want to make sure he can't fly the coop."

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Hogan stood by as Le Beau spoke in rapid French to the prisoners-cum-"experts" and the Underground agent now inside the roped-off area of the camp. Schultz had been assigned to the location as an extra guard, especially to watch over the senior POW. Le Beau was making wide, sweeping gestures with his arms, while the others were nodding agreement and one visitor was being quite vehement.

"Nous devons déterrer cet endroit pour voir que nous avons. Le trou que l'homme anglais a fait n'était pas assez grand," Rhodes, who had been chosen as the "head Vichy expert" said in his best high school French.

"Oui, oui, je suis d'accord," Louis replied. "Mais les Boches…"

"What are they saying, Colonel Hogan?" Schultz asked, bewildered.

"Only the experts would know, Schultz. I don't know anything about archaeology."

Kinch approached. "They say they want to dig, Colonel."

"Dig?" Schultz repeated, laughing. "The Kommandant is not about to allow digging."

Le Beau started translating back to the phony Frenchmen. Rhodes and the Underground agent started ranting and raving immediately.

"Looks like you've got a revolt on your hands, Schultz!" Hogan said, not disappointed, as other guards started closing in to see what all the commotion was about.

"They say they must dig to proceed properly, Colonel," Le Beau said, shrugging his shoulders.

"No! There will be no digging!" Schultz insisted loudly.

The Heuneburg expert started protesting again as Le Beau shook his head and shrugged to confirm the German's denial. Suddenly a voice from behind made Hogan and Schultz turn around. "What is going on here, gentlemen?" Klink was sauntering toward them, with Smallwood and the German officers who had accompanied him to camp in tow. "Is there a problem?"

"Herr Kommandant, the Frenchmen are saying they want to dig up the area. I have told them that would not be allowed," Schultz announced proudly.

"But in order to find all the treasures hidden here, Kommandant, there must be digging!" said Smallwood excitedly. He looked at Hogan. "How much did your man find when he was trying to escape?"

Hogan kept his arms folded across his chest and clenched his jaw to avoid saying something he knew he may not live to regret. "I don't believe I've had the pleasure?" he said expectantly.

"Colonel Hogan, this is Desmond Smallwood, a brilliant scientist from England," Klink introduced smugly.

"So you've captured another one," Hogan said. "What are you going to try to make him do?"

"Colonel Hogan, Herr Smallwood is here of his own free will," explained a man whose voice Hogan recognized as Colonel Stigler's. "He is being most cooperative."

Hogan raised an eyebrow and felt the muscles in his neck tense. "So you're a traitor," he shot at Smallwood, staring hard.

Smallwood did not flinch under Hogan's gaze. "I simply succumb to the inevitable future," he said.

Hogan was disturbed by the man's lack of guilt. "You disgust me," he said, quietly seething. "Selling out to the Krauts. Profiting from people's suffering. You could cost thousands of good men their lives!"

"Come now, Hogan, you can't expect me to be looking for the approval of a failed flyboy." Smallwood snorted. "You wouldn't be here if you were worthy of those eagles you wear so proudly in the first place. And neither would your men. I have nothing to fear from the likes of you."

Le Beau and Kinch exchanged looks as their commanding officer's eyes darkened with unexpressed rage. "What you mean is, while the Germans have their rifles aimed at me, you're invulnerable," Hogan said in a dangerously low voice. "Just wait till after the war, Smallwood. I'll meet you in the playground at recess, and you won't have any big bad Krauts to help you."

Smallwood offered a thin smile. "I admire your patriotism, Colonel, even if it is misdirected. You don't even know what I am proposing to these gentlemen."

"No, but I have no doubt you'll be asking a colossal sum of money for the discussion," Hogan said pointedly.

Finally, he had made Smallwood squirm. Hogan noticed a small flicker of doubt cross the Englishman's face. But since Hogan then turned his back on the man in genuine repulsion, Smallwood could not confirm that Hogan's choice of words was anything but coincidence.

"The men want to dig," Stigler said, eyeing Hogan carefully, then turning his attention to Klink. "So they will dig. Colonel Klink, please supply the men with what they need."

"But Colonel Stigler," Klink started to protest, "digging in a POW camp—"

"It will please Herr Smallwood," Stigler interrupted. "I take it, mein Herr, that you will want to be a part of this excavation."

Smallwood nodded, immediately putting his encounter with Hogan out of his mind. "Oh, yes, Colonel Stigler. Very much so."

Le Beau turned to the group of flyers pretending to be archaeologists and explained something to them in French, with Kinch interjecting ideas in a hushed voice. The answer from the assembled men was loud and incomprehensible to the Germans. Le Beau turned back to the officers to explain. "They say they will need more men than themselves to do what is necessary. Can you order your prisoners to help?"

"Prisoners cannot be forced to work; it is against the Geneva Convention," Klink said.

"Perhaps," Hogan put in, "for thirty pfennigs an hour they would consider doing it anyway."

"Thirty pfennigs! That's highway robbery! What about their contribution to world knowledge?"

Hogan shrugged. "We know all we need to at the moment, Kommandant."

"Twenty pfennigs, Hogan; that's my final offer—and that's subject to approval from Berlin."

"You go ahead and ask, Kommandant," Hogan agreed. "I think I could find five or six men willing to do some digging for that."

"Good."

"As long as you include an extra shower this week for all the prisoners."

"Hogannnn—"

"Just do it, Klink," Stigler broke in. "It is required, especially now. Herr Smallwood, we shall take you into Hammelburg for a wonderful dinner and some charming company, and tomorrow you shall enjoy yourself here, courtesy of the Third Reich. After that," he added solely for Hogan's benefit, "we shall begin our own discussions about how we can best look after you in exchange for the vital information you will be giving us." Stigler smiled as Hogan turned back to watch them. "And Colonel Klink," Stigler added, "be sure that your Colonel Hogan is reminded that he is a prisoner of war… with very alert men with rifles watching him. Just in case he has any ideas about being a hero."