Chapter 11
The following week was one of the happiest that Legolas and Estel would remember throughout their lives.
Legolas led Estel to the most beautiful part of the Great Greenwood, untouched by evil and majestic in its beauty. They saw waterfalls and mountains, glades and dense forest, spacious groves of ancient trees that had eons to grow. They stopped at crystal clear streams and lay on silk-soft grass. And they encountered many creatures of the forest. In this part of the woods there was no hunting; and the animals were unafraid and numerous.
Legolas was surprised to find that Estel's woodcraft equalled his own, the young man moved noiselessly, if somewhat less gracefully than the elf, and could find tracks with ease.
But most of all they enjoyed simply being together. They walked, unhurriedly, often with their hands interlinked. Sometimes they talked, but often they walked in contented silence. They stopped in the most beautiful places or simply when one of them wanted to halt. They would chose a comfortable spot and sit down together, and frequently such brief rest periods would turn into long hours spent lazily together. They found out about each other's likes and dislikes, preferences, habits – all the small things that distinguish close friends or lovers from mere acquaintances.
In many ways Legolas was much like the elves Estel had grown up with. He found that the young elf liked to get up very early, that he normally slept on his side, slightly curled up, and he was not surprised that Legolas needed much less sleep and sustenance than he did. Estel had accepted these differences a long time ago. The young man asked Legolas dozens of questions about his past, and slowly a picture of a lonely childhood and youth emerged, with a busy father and few friends. Legolas even talked about the unmerciful teasing he had experienced so frequently.
One sunny afternoon they sat near a small brook. As often, Legolas was leaning against a tree, and Estel lay outstretched with his head and shoulders in Legolas' lap. The elf ran his hands through Estel's dark, wavy hair. Estel had asked Legolas what he wanted to do with his life, and after a moment of thoughtful silence, Legolas told Estel that since he was much younger, it had been his ambition to become a warrior, but his position as a prince and his father's protectiveness had never allowed him the depth of training needed; and he had had to contend with many comments about being a spoiled prince, even though the most ardent critics had to admit that he could shoot better than almost anyone else in Mirkwood.
"I have often wished I was not a prince… I think it would have been much easier to make friends, I could have been just like everybody else, and I could have chosen what I want to do. But I never had that option and my father has not helped things … always keeping me apart." There was pain in the young elf's voice.
Estel reached up and gently touched Legolas' face. "Legolas? The opinion of a mortal may not count for much, but for all that it is worth - I like you just the way you are."
Legolas took Estel's hands in his own. He smiled, although the smile did not reach his eyes. "Estel, thank you. Your opinion matters much to me." He lent down and kissed Estel gently. And after that, all thoughts of serious conversation were forgotten for a while.
-o-o-o-
Legolas had had very little contact with humans, and for him almost every hour brought a new discovery of the differences between men and elves. He was surprised to find that Estel needed to sleep more or less the entire night to be fully awake at the next morning, and if he was woken too early, the young man was decidedly grumpy. Legolas learned quickly that waking Estel before dawn to listen to the birds awakening was not appreciated – the young man did not perceive the beauty of nature early in the morning.
Legolas was also astounded at how much and how frequently Estel could eat. The young elf usually ate three meals a day, but the midday meal was normally only a very light snack, and it was not uncommon for elves to omit that meal altogether. Estel told him that he got quite hungry if he did not eat anything during the day. There were other basic differences between their bodies and their functions that surprised Legolas. Like all living being, elves had to pass water and waste occasionally, but it was just that – occasionally, whereas for Estel it seemed to be a daily event. In other regards, their bodies functioned similarly, and as they got to know each other better, they also learned to accommodate each other's needs and preferences.
On a different level, Legolas also found out much about Estel. They talked much about Estel's upbringing in Imladris, altogether the young man appeared to have had a happy childhood in a loving family, but his father's and brother's love had not been able to still Estel's curiosity concerning his birth family. Also no amount of affection could deny the fact that Estel was a mortal amongst elves, and that there were things he simply could not do, or not do as well as his companions. Imladris had always been a refuge for members of different races, Elrond had always had an open house; the elves of Imladris were used to the comings and goings of others, so there had been no prejudices against the human child amongst them. But no one could remove the knowledge of being different from the boy. Legolas could see the hurt and insecurity in Estel's face as he talked about these feelings.
-o-o-o-
It was the evening of their fourth day into their journey, and they were perched high up in the branches of a large tree, watching the sun setting in the west. They were sitting on strong branch, Legolas leaning back against the trunk and Estel in front of him, safely encircled by the elf's arms around his waist, when the young man said:
"Legolas, I wish I was not mortal. If I were an elf, it would be much more difficult for our families to object to us liking each other. They might even see it as a chance of reconciliation between the two realms. But I am mortal, and this is likely to cause an even deeper rift."
Legolas was silent for a moment and then said quietly into "Even if you were an elf, things would not be so very different. It is an added complication, but I do not believe that my father would ever be happy with me choosing a male. He wants me to father a child so that there is an heir should happen something either to himself or me."
"Can you?" Estel knew fully well that fewer and fewer elves, male and female, were able to produce young ones. The elves were a fading race in Middle Earth, and both their desire and ability to procreate had lessened over the years. There were not many young elves now, although there were more amongst the wood elves than the high elves.
"What? Father a child? Yes, the healers say I can father children. And this means that my father is already looking for a suitable alliance." Legolas sighed. "I am much too young to get married, and I am not at all certain I wish to bond with a female. But I do not believe I have much choice." There was both bitterness and pain in Legolas' voice.
"Especially now that I have met you … Estel …" Unconsciously Legolas tightened his arms around the young man. Estel leaned back into the embrace, and for a moment both of them remained silent.
"Legolas?"
"Yes?"
"Sometimes when you have held me and we touched … I have wanted … I mean, I wanted more …" Estel turned slightly so that he could look at Legolas' face.
Legolas smiled. "You mean you wanted to make love?" Estel nodded, both surprised and relieved by the elf's outspokenness. "I would like that as well … but I also feel we have only just met … somehow it does not feel quite right yet. Also, you are still very young, I do not want you to have regrets."
Estel swung his legs across the branch they were sitting on, so that instead of leaning into Legolas, he was facing the elf.
"I would not have any regrets, not with you."
Legolas gently touched Estel's cheek. "I would rather wait a little while, for your sake, and my own."
"But I will be leaving soon!"
"I know. But I do not believe that we will not see each other again. There will be other times."
Reluctantly Estel nodded. Patience had never been his strong point. And he was very strongly attracted to Legolas.
By this time, the sun had gone down and only the last golden glow was visible in the western sky.
"Estel? Do you think you could rest here for the night? I am very comfortable here."
Estel looked around him. "I do not think I can sleep sat on this branch but there is enough support for a flet here … we could build one and I will be fine. I have slept on flets on many occasions."
Legolas looked at the young man in surprise. "I did not know the elves in Imladris used flets."
"They do for travelling and hunting. It is safer in the trees than on the ground."
Quickly they constructed a small platform of branches and leaves. They retrieved their pack from the ground and settled for a night high up in the trees. Estel curled up against Legolas, and went to sleep quickly.
-o-o-o-
Legolas stayed awake for a long time. Too many thoughts were going through his mind. He could not help wondering what the future held for them, how they could manage to see each other again; what his father – and for that matter, Lord Elrond – would say if they found out about the affection of their sons. Legolas was honest enough to admit to himself that he cared deeply for the young man, and that the thought of Estel's departure filled him with dread. There had been so little friendship and companionship in his life, it would be hard to lose what he had only just gained.
His thoughts wandered further. Another unpleasant prospect was that within the next two weeks, Rainan and his two friends would return from their extended patrol. Galadhir had sent them to patrol the western border of Mirkwood, along the foot of the mountains. This was not a popular duty, it invariably meant encounters with orcs or even trolls, and possibly with dwarfs and spiders, and it also usually meant several months away from Lasgalen. And most wood elves did not like leaving their home for extended periods.
Legolas wondered whether Rainan would try to target him again, and somehow he thought that this was very likely. He just hoped that the patrol would not return before Estel had left, if Rainan and his friends found out that he had made friends with a mortal, his life would become even more difficult. But the very moment this thought had crossed his mind; the young elf was already ashamed of it. Estel deserved better than that. If someone had a problem with his friendship with a mortal, it was their problem, not his.
Legolas decided that whatever might come his way, he would stand by Estel. Their friendship was worth fighting for, and Legolas felt much more confident in his physical abilities than he had even a few short months ago.
Legolas' thoughts wandered back to Estel. He realised that even in the short time they had known each other, something had changed for him. All of a sudden there was someone who accepted him without any demands or expectations, who simply cared for him. Not for the prince, not for the king's son or a particularly beautiful elf. Just for Legolas. And that was such a special feeling that it almost brought tears to his eyes. He very gently stroked Estel's hair.
Legolas was old enough to know very well that a long-term relationship with Estel would be very difficult and that they would have to overcome many difficulties. He doubted that the young man fully realised the extent of the barriers they would face. And yet – Legolas had never felt close enough to anyone to even consider a long-term relationship. There was something very special about this boy, and Legolas did not intend to let him go.
With a sigh, the prince turned into Estel' arms. He would not solve any of these issues now, so it was time to get some rest.
-o-o-o-
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