I was kind of in the mood for a romantic tragedy tonight, and not sure where to find one (at least one that I would like), I decided to write the beginning of one myself. Besides, this story has been in my mind for a while- vaguely- and I figured it was high time I gave it some structure, some sort of plot, etc. and write it down. I'm aware that I have several storied going that I'm not finished with,so please don't harp on my about it. Half of my stories are on one computer and half are on the other, and my e-mail isn't working right XP
A bit of forewarning: This looks like an ending. That's kind of because it is. Starting with the end is a structure that has always fascinated me but that I have never attempted myself,so I hope it turns out all right.
Nintendo holds all copyrights blah blah blah you get the picture.
It was known for years afterwards as the greatest storm to hit the Mushroom Kingdom; the Storm of a Hundred Days. Though in actuality it only lasted a week, the seven day squall seemed to span across eternity. Nothing could be seen through the relentlessly beating downpour but darkness, and the howling of the wind like restless demons and the roar of the thunder like angry gods drowned any sound. The citizens wished to the stars constantly, begging for help, but it was as though the Star Spirits had turned their backs on the helpless kingdom, casting a shadow of despair as dark and hopeless as the storm itself over the land. None dared to venture from the safety of their homes. None- save for one.
A dark figure stands alone in an empty field, looking small and weak in the midst of the raging tempest around him. Soaked royal blue robes hang heavily on his shaking narrow form. Salty tears more blinding than the rainwater that shrouds the world in a dark grey veil, he drops to his knees, groping sightlessly until he finds it; a cold, limp hand. He clings to it desperately, tears coursing down cheeks that are forever hidden from the world.
A fork of vivid lightening tears the dark sky overhead, followed by a deafening thunderclap that shakes the earth, and for a moment he can see her clearly; her soft face paled but still beautiful, still perfect; unmarred by the raging elements. Her lips- once so full and lush- are tinted blue from the cold; parted in a silent mournful sigh. Wet brown ringlets cling to her forehead and neck. Her vivid green eyes stare sightlessly past him, and he chokes back the flood of tears that threaten to obscure his vision again. He wants to see her; to look into her beautiful eyes once more. To see his lover's face… a chance that she had never had.
Slowly he releases her lifeless hand, and raises his arms up to grasp the hood that covers his head. Closing his eyes, he draws back the hood, and then places his hands on the sides of a smooth white mask. He gains a firm grip on the wet porcelain and then, taking a deep, shuddering breath, he tears it off, breaking the black leather band that has held it in place all his life. As the wind and rain whip stingingly against a face never seen by mortal eyes he throws the mask down, where it shatters with a tinkling crash too small to be heard over the din of the gale.
In the absence of light he fumbles for her body once more, until his hand touches her still soft form. He follows the delicate shape of her body until he is touching her face, and smiles weakly, caressing her cheek. He reverently lowers his face to meet hers. "I wish I had given you this sooner," he whispers gently, and presses his lips against hers, kissing her passionately. Grief suddenly overwhelms him, and he pulls away from her, tears once again spilling onto his cheeks. His sobs are ragged and harsh; they burn his throat and tear at his heart as he laments, his tears and sharp gasps harmonizing with the rain and wind around him.
"WHY!" he screams, throwing his head back. The dark sky replies with a crack of lightening and angry rumble of thunder as the rain spatters against his upturned face. "WHY DID YOU TAKE HER FROM ME! OH, STARS! END MY WRETCHED LIFE! THERE IS NO LIFE WITHOUT HER! Oh Stars! Oh, Susan……" he moans, dropping his face again, his shoulders shaking with each harsh intake of breath. "I can't live without you Susan," he sobbed, taking her lifeless form in his arms and holding her close to him, his eyes squeezed shut.
He would give anything to take it back, to undo the events that had led to this tragic waste. To hear her laughing again, or even just breathing again. If only he had… if only… if only…..
But now it is too late. She will never laugh again; never dance with him in bright sunlight and tell him that she loves him. Never again. His harsh sobs have calmed somewhat, leaving behind an ache too deep too fathom in his heart. He can't imagine life like this. He opens his eyes as lightening once more flashes overhead, and something glints in the corner of his eye; bright shards of broken porcelain. He stares at the fragments of his old mask, a cruel reminder of his own part in bringing about this dreadful end, and a cool resolve comes into his dark eyes.
Gently he lays his love down, giving her one final kiss and then tenderly closing her eyes. Then slowly he turns to face the jagged splinters, and reaches for a shard as long as his hand; narrow and sharp as broken glass. He grabs it and turns it towards his heart. Clearly and calmly he cries to the storm "Let us be reunited in eternity; love knows no end!" and plunges the knife-like piece into his heart, ending his pain forever.
As his vision clouds, and crimson droplets fall from the shard like the tears of a broken heart, he reaches out and grasps her hand, holding it tightly. "I love you," he whispers, and falls forward as his eyes close for the last time.
It should be noted that I really like reviews. I'd be particularly interested in your opinion regarding the structure of this 'end at the beginning' start of the story. Does it work, the way I did it? Should I tweak it in any particular way to make it work better? Anyway, I'll shut up now.
