Disclaimer: I naturally do not own Harry Potter or anything related to it. If you don't know who does, perhaps you should find out, because you're not going to understand this otherwise!

Hey everybody! Thanks SO SO much for the reviews! I was so ecstatic! Just a little note: I'm going to France for a few weeks, so I won't be updating until I get back. Sorry!

The Diary of Padfoot and Prongs

Dear Diary,

Ah, alas, it has been a day since Prongs and I last made an entry.

Padfoot! You said we were going to name it now!

I'm getting to that. Patience is a virtue –

Virtue is a grace; Grace is a little girl who wouldn't wash her face. I don't care about patience! Diary is a stupid name for a diary!

Because there's just SO many other names you call a Diary besides 'Diary'. Right?

What I meant was, it's too predictable and unoriginal. We are not unoriginal adolescent's Padfoot, not at all. If we call our Diary 'Diary' we are lowering ourselves to the level of our fellow, boring peers.

Well, what do you suggest?

I was thinking a type of flower perhaps...

That type of flower wouldn't happen to be a 'Lily', would it?

Not necessarily. At least, not just Lily. Maybe 'Lilyfield' or 'RedLily' or 'LilyGlade' or –

Or how about no? You're the one who's prattling on about being original.

Well, what makes your ideas so good?!?!?

Besides the fact that I'm gorgeous? Well, for a start, I don't think our diary is a girl.

It has a gender? Since when does it have a gender? You can't just give our diary a gender! I should get a say in this!

Well, Prongs, what gender do you think our diary is?

Male.

That's exactly what I said! Why argue for the sake of arguing?

It was the principle of the matter. This is also my diary. I should get to pick its gender too.

Ok ok. We still haven't named it. Should we call it a 'real' name or a made up one?

A real name. Like James.

Yeh, Prongs, you would love the name James, you egomaniac. I think we should call it Pablo.

Pablo? You've got to be kidding? What kind of a name for a diary is Pablo?

A good one. Come on, Prongs, it's not that important. To you maybe. I, on the otherhand, think a name is what makes a diary. Without a good name, you can not have a good diary. Have you ever even had a diary? No, but I think about them. Sometimes. Ok then... Can we just call him Pablo? He's probably getting bored.

Fine then. But please note that it was against my will to be so rash with Pablo's naming.

Noted. And finally we are moving on. Yes, there was indeed a reason we decided to write today as opposed to yesterday.

What he says is true –

What who says? Pablo or Me?

Capitalize 'Me' why don't you... You of cause, Padfoot, you peabrain. Continuing. We have some astonishing news.

Very astonishing news.

Don't start that again! What is this news, you ask? What could make Prongs and Padfoot –

What could make Padfoot and Prongs so excited when their lives are generally so exciting?

Moony has a girlfriend! Nah ni nah ni nah nah!

Our dear friend Moony has acquired a female companion! It's the talk of the school! And it's about time. He didn't get much action at all last year.

Yeh... he was getting pretty desperate. Well, the girl's name is Serebri someone and she's in Ravenclaw.

I think her last name is something quite muggle, like Smith.

Oh yeh! It's Baker! Like: Butcher, Baker, Candlestick Maker.

Umm... yeh... right... Yeh, it is Baker. Remember how we were teasing Moony about it. Imagine if he changed his last name to Baker!

And then him and Serebri could buy a Bakery together and call it 'Baker's Bakery'.

Imagine Moony running a bakery. What a joke!

I dunno... He's pretty into food. He ate an egg sandwich, 4 rashes of bacon, 2 apples, some tomatoes and a bowl of that weird cereal he likes for breakfast today. And it wasn't like he had much to get him hungry either –

Aside from that you ate half his dinner last night?

He still had plenty!

If it's classified by how much one likes food, Prongs, I think you or I would be more suitable for the position of baker.

Or Wormtail.

Or Wormtail. So, going by your theory, Moony is the LEAST likely of us to run a bakery.

Yeh, he is. What theory?

Don't worry. Seriously, Prongs, do you ever think about what you say?

When Lily is around. Always, always, always.

Ah, so that's why you told her this morning you loved her, and I quote, 'Sticky-out furry bits' on the end of her hair before she's brushed it in the morning.

Well, I do. It makes her looks untamed and wild and devilish and...

Sorry Pablo, I guess I will have to take over while Prongs drools on you. Don't worry, he won't be too long. I hope.

Ok... He's taking a bit longer than I thought. Just wait while I bring him back to reality.

Padfoot! I was just about to fall asleep and have dreams about Lily!

How can you be 'just about to' have dreams about something? Or someone, in your case.

I can just feel it. It's like the whole soulmate thing I told you about that time.

More like those 100 times. I just can't see you and Lily being soulmates, mate. She's never shown the slightest bit of interest you.

She's playing hard to get. And we're soulmates. Definitely. I've drawn up a chart of the many different ways we are meant to be if you'd like me to go and get it?

Prongs, You showed me the chart last night. I helped you make the chart. I gave you the idea for the chart so you could show me your whole soulmate thing quicker. I don't think I need to see the chart. Again.

Are you sure? Coz it won't take long for me to get it. I could just whip upstairs and be back in a jiffy. You know, I don't mind. I like looking at it. You don't have to feel like it'd be a chore for me to get it. I really don't mind. Seriously, Padfoot, it's really easy to get.

But I don't want to see it. I almost have it memorized you show me so much. There are more important things in life. However, if you feel like getting me your Transfiguration homework, then that's a completely different matter.

I thought you'd finished that? And you can't copy. Last time we copied each other we got a week of detentions. It was hell. Don't you ever learn?

Apparently not, according to you. Well, 'twas worth a shot. Anyway, I think we need to start a Prankfest again.

You've read my mind! I was just thinking the school has been quiet lately. Remember last year when we got that Prank contest going with the Slytherin girls?

Ah, the memories. Fifth year was great fun, if you exclude OWLS.

OWLS weren't that bad either. We still did fabulously, as was expected.

But it's unnecessary stress. And Moony and Wormtail were studying nearly all the time, so nothing was as much fun.

I suppose so. But, back to the Prankfest. We'll talk to our colleagues about it and get back to you, Pablo.

Well, lookie here. Lily's arrived.

Where? I can't see her? Oh, over there. Say hello to her! Is she looking at me? Does she look like she's thinking of me?

Prongs, get over yourself. She's come down to study. She isn't even thinking of thinking of you. And if she is thinking of you, she's probably hoping you don't talk to her and leave her in peace.

You suppose so? How sad. Let me take Pablo, Padfoot, and I'll pretend it's my diary, which I write perceptive thoughts about the wizarding world in.

She's never going to believe that. She'll think your keeping a snog diary or something. But if you want to, take it. I'm going to go and finish my Transfiguration stuff.

Ok. Now Pablo, I want you to imagine this is a sensitive, observant, beautiful comment and try and communicate to Lily it is: My bed was not made today because I was slept in late and had to rush everything to get to breakfast. When I arrived at breakfast I had forgotten to put shoes on and was given a detention. I think the moral of this is that Hogwarts students need more time in the mornings and lessons should be shorter, so nobody has to rush. Although the moral also could be: don't tease the houseelves so they'll make your bed and clean up your stuff. Are you giving off a sensitive vibe, Pablo? Lily is looking at me weirdly. Maybe it's working. I'm going to go and talk to her. Wish me luck!

Lots of Love,

Prongs (and Padfoot would say bye too if he was still here)