Chapter 22
Estel quietly left the house and walked through the gardens to one of his favourite places near the river. He sat down on the shore, with his elbows on his knees and propping up his chin in his hands. He was staring out over the water, but completely oblivious to what he was really seeing. His mind was churning with the information he had just received.
Although Elrond's revelation had come as a surprise, to say the least, there was also an element of relief. There had always been too many gaps and incomplete explanations for Estel's inquisitive mind; his own heritage had remained an unsolved mystery. Until this evening. Elrond's explanation, as mind-blowing as it was, explained all the secrets and whisperings, the omissions, and last but not least, quite a lot about himself that he had wondered about.
Estel had heard many times that he looked as if he was related to Elrond by blood, a mortal version of his own children. He had always disregarded these comments either as well meant, but meaningless complements; or had attributed the similarity in appearance to coincidence. Now he had the explanation – he was indeed related to Elrond by blood, even if it was remotely through the generations.
He was also remotely related to Isildur. The last of this royal line. Suddenly the weight of that knowledge seemed crushing. Isildur, the son of Elendil, the last of the Numenorean kings. Isildur, who became the king of Anor and Gondor and who fought in the Last Alliance of Elves and men. Isildur, who cut off Sauron's ring but did not have the strength to destroy it, and with this failure, doomed mankind to strife and division.
And he, Estel, was the last of this line. Royal, but tainted. And Elrond had said that he would be hunted all his life. Suddenly Estel felt very much alone. Elrond had said that he was also the rightful heir of the throne of Anor and Gondor. Estel felt utterly unprepared for that knowledge and responsibility. He began to think about what he knew about these two areas. After Elendil's and Isildur's death, the kingdom of Arnor, the home of the Numenorean refugees, was divided and eventually fell into insignificance. The remnants of the Numenoreans became the rangers, a proud and secretive people, led by their own leaders but without a king.
Gondor, in the South, remained intact as a kingdom but was ruled by the Steward's family. Although not a king in title, a Steward and his family fulfilled all rules and duties of a royal family. Estel could not remember the name of the current Steward, but he had heard of his reputation. He was said to be a proud and unforgiving man, difficult to deal with. Of one thing he was certain – if he as a sixteen-year-old boy even tried to lay claim to his heritage, he would be laughed out of the Steward's court at best or be killed as an impostor at worst.
Estel shook his head. What had Elrond said? That he had many choices … and what did all of this mean for himself and Legolas? How would Legolas react? Would he despise him for his heritage? Did this mean that they would have to break up? Elrond had told him that Thranduil knew his true identity. This explained some of the hostility he had encountered. What would happen between Legolas and his father if Thranduil found out that Legolas and himself were not just friends?
Estel continued musing, churning over his new knowledge and its implications in his mind, and then decided that he really needed to talk to Legolas. It was several hours past midnight when Estel left his place at the riverside and walked straight to the large tree underneath Legolas' window. The twins were away with the rangers, and at this moment, Estel did not really care if Elrond found out that he visited Legolas this night. But nothing stirred, and with practised ease, the boy climbed up the large tree framing the balcony on Legolas' room.
As he had expected, the shutters to the large doors were open. The night breeze gently swayed the light curtains, and the room as bathed in moonlight. Legolas was sound asleep on his bed, curled up on his side. A small part of Estel's mind registered that he had never seen Legolas in his sleep clothes. When they had travelled together, they had not changed for the night, and otherwise they had never shared a room overnight.
For a moment, Estel regarded the prince. He looked impossibly young and ethereal in the cool light of the moon. Estel was reluctant to wake the elf and yet – they needed to talk. He stepped forward into the room, and silently approached the bed. As he stretched out his hand to touch Legolas' shoulder, the elf became aware of his presence and woke. He turned and his eyes focused.
"Estel?" Legolas sat up. "You should not be here."
"I know. But something has happened. I need to tell you."
For a long moment, their eyes locked. "Come here then, and tell me what happened."
Estel sat down next to Legolas and told him everything Elrond had said to him. He ended,
"So I know now who I am, but perhaps it would have been better not to know. I am no king; I will never be a king. So what do I do now – what about us?"
Legolas slipped his arm around the shoulders of the young man. They sat for a while in silence. Then Legolas turned to face the young man. The moonlight clearly illuminated Estel's features, even though he did not possess the natural elven glow.
"Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me about your heritage. It is not something many people should find out! But what you have told me just confirms what I have known since meeting you last year. You are someone special, no ordinary mortal."
He sighed. "Elrond is right, it will not help things with my father … but again, I do not think that it will make that much of a difference. He will object anyway, much as your father does."
Legolas leaned forward, and embraced Estel. "I come from a flawed line. Would it not be better for you to leave me?" Estel whispered in his ear.
"Oh Estel! You are not Isildur; you are only related to him through many generations. You have great inner strength, even if you do not know it yet. One day you will have to decide which path your life will take, but you will not have to do this for many years to come."
Estel lifted his head. "Do you really trust me that much?"
"Yes. You are someone special, I have always known it."
"Thank you." Suddenly Estel yawned. Legolas smiled. "You are exhausted, and need rest." He moved backwards until he sat leaning against the wall, and pulled Estel with him. Without resistance, Estel curled up with his head in Legolas' lap. He was asleep in moments. The emotional upheaval of the night had caught up with him.
Legolas sat silently, only sometimes gently running his fingers through Estel's dark hair. The night had given him much to think about as well. But the more he thought about it, the more he felt that Elrond's decision to tell Estel of his heritage had been wise, the boy needed to know, there had been too many gaps and unanswered questions. And if it was true that evil forces would hunt him, then Legolas wanted to be the one to stand by his side.
And so, as the night progressed and gave way to the first tentative rays of sunlight, Legolas' determination to be Estel's protector grew. He also realised how much he truly cared about the young man – and that after only two brief summers! Legolas knew himself well enough to know that he did not enter any emotional commitment lightly, and that he had never felt as deeply about anyone before.
o-o-o-
Elrond found them in the same position a few hours later. He had not been able to find Estel in his room or at any of his favourite places nearby. After their conversation the evening before, he was slightly concerned what Estel might have done, when he thought to check Legolas' room. Neither of them had appeared for breakfast. The elf–lord knocked on Legolas' door, and, on receiving no answer, entered.
His presence woke Legolas, who immediately sat up straight. Elrond regarded him and his sleeping foster son for a long moment. Despite having just woken up, Legolas looked surprisingly composed, although Elrond detected also apprehension in the dark eyes of the prince.
"I thought I might find Estel here." He sighed. "Legolas, you know I do not approve of your relationship with Estel, and you probably understand a my position a bit better now. But I also do not wish to lose my son. As long as your father gives his permission, you may come here to visit."
Legolas did not miss the way Elrond had phrased this invitation. Normally the sentence would have closed with a phrase like 'you are welcome here'. But at least Elrond did not close the doors completely.
"Thank you. Estel has been asleep like this for quite some time."
Almost despite himself, Elrond's instinct as healer took over. "This position does not look very comfortable for you. Your back must hurt from sitting like this and supporting Estel."
"It does not matter."
"I will help you move him so that you can get dressed."
With Elrond's help, Legolas moved Estel off his lap and onto the bed. When he stood up, he realised how true Elrond's words had been, sitting for hours in a very uncomfortable position had indeed left him stiff and his back sore. He could not quite suppress a wince as he straightened up.
"You need a steam bath to relax those muscles. You know where the steam bath is?"
Legolas nodded. "Yes, thank you."
o-o-o-
Estel woke up much later that day, feeling refreshed and much less confused than he had the night before. He decided that his new knowledge did not really alter much at the moment. In years to come, he would have to make some difficult choices, but not yet, and probably not even soon.
On that morning Estel took the conscious decision not to do anything with his new knowledge and indeed to ignore it as long as possible. He had no wish to become Aragorn, Arathorn's son and Isildur's heir. He wanted to remain Estel Elrondion of Imladris for as long as he could.
o-o-o-
The weeks passed. Estel and Legolas spent as much time together as they could, even if that meant finding gaps between Estel's chores. But even though Elrond could not be said to accept their relationship, he also did not go out of his way to prevent them from meeting any longer. Estel and Legolas also spent some time with Lindwen and Calanthir.
Mid-summer came and went, and Legolas received a message to return home. His father and Lindwen's parents were waiting for their return.
o-o-o-
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