Well hey everybody! It wasn't actually writer's block, nor was it a wave of flames, as so many people believe, I was just pretty sure everyone that I knew personally hated me. Not my faithful reviewers, never! Every single one of you has said something nice, I haven't gotten one offending review yet. Okay, okay, don't hate me, I know I haven't been updating in a long, LONG time, so you don't need to remind me when you review. Sorry! ^ ^; Oh, and this chapter will be really confusing, but do your best, k?
***
Reflection
Chapter 12-This Isn't Good
***
She bit her lip in fear. The entrance was drawing closer and closer with each step. 'Think of mother, Kagome, think of mother, and father...' She thought.
'Father's dead...'
She raised eyes to Sesshomaru, who walked in front of her, 'But I knew him before he died.'
Her hands were trembling uncontrollably. She couldn't do this, she just couldn't... A task of this importance required somebody more qualified. Someone with strength, and courage. Why did Tenshik have to come to her...?
They approached the last step. The archway that led to the darkness within the shrine was suddenly far more vast and tall then Kagome had thought. "Follow me."
She nodded, and stood frozen in her last moment of fear, and then, breathed deeply, closed her eyes, and stepped in. Her footsteps echoed in the darkness. There was no light, except for a dim stretch of it falling in from the outside. It was unnaturally quiet, she couldn't hear a thing beside her own breathing, feet, and heartbeat. Had she been close enough, Kagome was certain that she could have heard Sesshomaru's as well.
"Come," his voice flowed out of the shadows, hinting at disappointment for her slowness.
"D-do you know where you're going?" She asked softly.
"I have been here before."
She nearly flinched at his voice, so cold, like the shrine itself. "Of course."
As she moved in the place, Kagome gradually began to notice the ultimate flaw in the building. It was so oddly silent, so dark, so cold, so impossibly...empty. There was no friendly soul here, no one left to warm the air. It was a shrine that stood like an abyss, like an ancient fragment of a lost civilization hidden in the trees. It wasn't even a shrine, because it didn't have a spirit to stand over. It was gone, it had left. Where had the soul gone?
They wandered forward for a long time, Kagome never aware of a difference as they passed between the same two stone walls. She didn't even notice, as she was gradually able to see her feet as they moved in front of her.
"Tenshik's ashes are just ahead."
Kagome looked up, and saw a wave of light falling out of the ceiling; from a sky light, of some sort. It was settling over a miniature statue of the shrine, identical to it, and it was set on a stone, rectangular block, like a piece of artwork on display.
'Her ashes...' Kagome touched the center of her chest. It was almost too much, that she would be walking in the body whose cremated remains were resting in front of her.
She was within a yard of it. Kagome prepared herself for anything, regarding Sesshomaru's prediction or otherwise. 'Let it be over soon, please...' She thought.
She was now a foot away, another step and she would be touching it. She held her breath.
Nothing was happening.
Her eyes flipped open, and she glanced around, nothing was happening, at all. As if in a trance, everything felt unusual, but she had felt that from the moment she had entered, there was no change. Perhaps it was more distinct now, but that was it. She turned to Sesshomaru, unhappy to face his certain disappointment, and even more so to realize that she was still trapped in Tenshik's body. She looked at him, smiled glumly, "Sesshomaru?" She whispered, "It didn't work..."
But he was looking at her with an utterly different expression than Kagome had expected. It was...shock. Confused, she asked, "Sesshomaru? Are you alright?" She looked down and realized in blushing surprise that she was holding his hands with both of hers, and peeked up at him questioningly.
His only answer was, "Tenshik..."
***
"Sesshomaru, my love, words cannot express what it means to me to see you again... It's me, it's me..." She reached out to him with both hands, sliding them over his own gently.
"Tenshik..."
"Yes," she whispered, her golden hair cast on an unseen breeze as it swayed about her. The sacred light that she had carried with her always had returned, shining around her as a soft aura. Her green eyes sparkled, and shone. She was alive again, his Tenshik.
Tears were forming at the corners of her eyes, out of pure joy of seeing him again. She felt Kagome's spirit inside of her, cradled, and certainly afraid. Tenshik was pierced with sympathy, remembering how it had been with her when she had awakened to a world that couldn't hear or see her. 'Hush, I'm so sorry Kagome, I shall speak with you soon, I promise, but please, endure this torture just a little longer, I must speak with Sesshomaru, it is so important.'
"Tenshik," Sesshomaru was almost trembling, to see her like this again, "Why have you done this? Why have you come? How-"
She faced him again, and cooed, "Hush beloved, there is no time. Now please," she gripped his hands tightly, "Tell me that you remember what I said to you when I died?"
He hesitated, "Why are you asking me?"
"Please love! Tell me that you remember!" Her voice was desperate.
"I don't understand but," he looked down, "Yes, I remember clearly. You told me that you would return, because your task had not been completed. Tenshik..."
"That's right," her voice was shaking with tears, "My task, I had to defeat the evil. The terrible evil, it destroyed me once, it shall not do it again..." She was mumbling more to herself then Sesshomaru, gentle face suddenly full of quiet rage. It was unfitting for her features.
He cupped her cheek with his hand, "What is this evil that you sense?"
"You call, it Naraku, but it so much more then what you see..."
He relaxed, his love was saying such strange things, but he was suddenly in familiar territory. "Naraku? Yes, we are already on the verge of destroying him, do not worry..."
She gripped his shoulders, "But you do not understand! It, he is more then that! He is so much more! He is a vortex, he is drawing everything in!"
His face became stern, and sad at the same time, "Tenshik, we will destroy him, the girl is already powerful enough. Please, rest, let your soul be at peace, and abandon her, because your presence is tearing her apart." It was tearing at his heart to have to say these things to the one that he had wished for so long to be at his side again, but she was so frantic now, that it seemed that this couldn't possibly be his calm Tenshik.
"No, Sesshomaru, there is more than that as well, I told you that I would return..."
He suddenly understood her words, and almost laughed. If this were truly Tenshik, then she must have suffered under delusion for many nights, to believe herself now. "Are you saying that this girl is your reincarnation?" His tone was almost openly mocking, "She is the reincarnation of another, you cannot be-"
"No! That is not true! She is not! I am telling you, despite the similarities, this girl is not who you think she is! She is not even a reincarnation, she is me...We are the same soul and mind, and heart, it is different then the art of reincarnation, she is me."
The laughter had left Sesshomaru's voice, and he held Tenshik's shoulders firmly. "That is not possible."
"It is under these circumstances! So great is the need for me to terminate this evil that my soul was born again."
"Then why does she resist you? Why do you and the girl conflict within this body?" He was being sharp with her.
"It may seem like two souls, she is, I am tearing myself apart, because...It is the only answer that I can find. Possession was the only possible answer to me. I exist now as a separate entity, only so that I may speak with you of things past."
"If you were truly the same being, then you would have the memories that you had all the same, would you not?"
"Sesshomaru, please don't be suspicious of me, I could never hurt another, I am trying to ease this new form of mine into realization, so that we may completely be one, but it is difficult, I am stubborn now, fearful of past experiences with reincarnation and possession. When I finally allow it, I will remember everything, but it will take time..."
He drew her close to him, and tried once again to ease his dear one out of the falsehoods her soul had somehow created. "Tenshik, I do not even understand this evil that you speak of, how it isn't Naraku, how we will fail if you do not destroy it yourself," He held her tighter, "But all I can think of, is that you weren't finished with a task, this is true, but that task was to stay with me; Tenshik, I never had the chance to tell you, but forgive me, I shouldn't have abandoned you, I was blind."
"No my love, do not say such things, I-" She was cut off as she wilted to the ground, panting.
"Tenshik?" He knelt by her side.
"My time is short, I only had so much strength to return to you this way for even the shortest time. I cannot explain now, but I will soon enough, before you face him, and you will because I love you and I need you to be there, you will need to know what you are to fight against..." Her words were hurried.
"No, you cannot leave!" He embraced her even more tightly. It was all so confusing...was this even Tenshik, or a ghostly demon come to insult him?
"Sesshomaru, I will always be with you. I will just look a little different."
His disbeliefs were suddenly dispelled as he looked into her beautiful face, and saw the desperate plea there, the pain, and the frustration and agony of living alone...This was Tenshik.
"No!"
He wasn't looking at her directly, but he felt a strange force coursing through him, a changing power, it was sweeping over her body, and his. She was leaving him again...
Silence fell over the shrine again. He was shaking with anger that he had blind enough not to believe in her for that precious moment, and that he had lost her again.
A soft voice spoke from within his grasp, "Sesshomaru? I'm so sorry...She died with such cruelty, you have been through so much pain, I'm so sorry... But can you, maybe, let go of me now?"
***
Kagome was ready to cry, but the tears would not come. She screamed at him, called at him, but he was speaking incoherently, no matter what. Always, as if he were talking to a totally different person, and she had a safe guess as to who.
"Have you finally lost it Sesshomaru?! Tenshik is dead! Nothing happened!" He continued with his conversation.
"Sesshomaru." Kagome tried to sink to her knees in despair, but her hands were linked around Sesshomaru's, and she couldn't remove them.
She watched him, in blank silence. Not bothering to protest his behavior, not bothering to protest her own. Kagome felt herself, trapped, and she was suddenly filled with hopelessness.
A voice swept around her, distant, like it was coming across a great distance, "Hush," it said, "I'm so sorry Kagome, I shall speak with you soon, I promise, but please, endure this torture just a little longer, I must speak with Sesshomaru, it is so important."
She regained focus, "T-tenshik....? Is this real? Am I dreaming?" Kagome wanted to shake, wanted to scream, her eyes were glued to Sesshomaru and she moved at times only...when she felt...allowed.
"WHAT'S HAPPENING?!" Light streaked across her vision like bolts of lighting, white light, it raced across the everything in seconds, engulfing Kagome, and her whole world in blinding purity.
"Sesshomaru?" She called, once more timid and afraid, "Sesshomaru!" The light beamed at her from all sides, and Kagome flinched at it. Dimly, she realized that her form was visible against this light, and that she was moving with her own will. But that seemed the least of her worries now, as she was stranded in this odd world.
"He isn't here, it's just...us. Or, it's just you."
Kagome spun around, and saw a woman standing before her, she had golden hair, radiant emerald eyes, and was dressed in an elegant kimono. She was smiling apologetically at her. The light itself, seemed to shine from her form, but Kagome was not impressed. She raised an eyebrow and reached out to the woman without warning, picking up a lock of her hair and cradling it in the palm of her hand before letting it drop back into its original place. "So you're not a mirror then, Tenshik."
She nodded, "Hold your own hair this time Kagome, I think you'll be happy to see that its your own."
Kagome scooped up a few hairs and clutched it before her eyes. It was black, cool, comforting, shining black, like a raven's coat. She looked up at Tenshik for a moment, "C-can I cry now?"
"Yes. Cry."
Kagome crashed to her knees and broke into great sobs, face in her hands. Tenshik knelt down beside her and placed a soothing hand on her shoulder, patting her back comfortingly. "Shh, Kagome, you're alright now."
Tenshik's hand was damp as it moved across Kagome's back. She looked up, "Tenshik, you're crying too, do I, control you now?"
The woman shook her tear streaked face slowly, "Don't speak of control Kagome, neither of us controls the other, we are a single person."
But at these words, Kagome went still, looking at Tenshik like she brandishing a knife at her. Without warning then, she sprang to her feet and laughed bitterly, "You possessed me Tenshik, you possessed me, and I'll never forgive you!"
***
Yes, yes, I know, so many things left unanswered, I'm sorry. And it wasn't as long as last time, no, but a lot just happened, so I think I'll let you sit on it for a while. Next chapter should be out soon, I've been a bit busy lately, so it's a little hard to produce stuff quickly now. Bye then dewdrops! Thanx for waiting!
***
Reflection
Chapter 12-This Isn't Good
***
She bit her lip in fear. The entrance was drawing closer and closer with each step. 'Think of mother, Kagome, think of mother, and father...' She thought.
'Father's dead...'
She raised eyes to Sesshomaru, who walked in front of her, 'But I knew him before he died.'
Her hands were trembling uncontrollably. She couldn't do this, she just couldn't... A task of this importance required somebody more qualified. Someone with strength, and courage. Why did Tenshik have to come to her...?
They approached the last step. The archway that led to the darkness within the shrine was suddenly far more vast and tall then Kagome had thought. "Follow me."
She nodded, and stood frozen in her last moment of fear, and then, breathed deeply, closed her eyes, and stepped in. Her footsteps echoed in the darkness. There was no light, except for a dim stretch of it falling in from the outside. It was unnaturally quiet, she couldn't hear a thing beside her own breathing, feet, and heartbeat. Had she been close enough, Kagome was certain that she could have heard Sesshomaru's as well.
"Come," his voice flowed out of the shadows, hinting at disappointment for her slowness.
"D-do you know where you're going?" She asked softly.
"I have been here before."
She nearly flinched at his voice, so cold, like the shrine itself. "Of course."
As she moved in the place, Kagome gradually began to notice the ultimate flaw in the building. It was so oddly silent, so dark, so cold, so impossibly...empty. There was no friendly soul here, no one left to warm the air. It was a shrine that stood like an abyss, like an ancient fragment of a lost civilization hidden in the trees. It wasn't even a shrine, because it didn't have a spirit to stand over. It was gone, it had left. Where had the soul gone?
They wandered forward for a long time, Kagome never aware of a difference as they passed between the same two stone walls. She didn't even notice, as she was gradually able to see her feet as they moved in front of her.
"Tenshik's ashes are just ahead."
Kagome looked up, and saw a wave of light falling out of the ceiling; from a sky light, of some sort. It was settling over a miniature statue of the shrine, identical to it, and it was set on a stone, rectangular block, like a piece of artwork on display.
'Her ashes...' Kagome touched the center of her chest. It was almost too much, that she would be walking in the body whose cremated remains were resting in front of her.
She was within a yard of it. Kagome prepared herself for anything, regarding Sesshomaru's prediction or otherwise. 'Let it be over soon, please...' She thought.
She was now a foot away, another step and she would be touching it. She held her breath.
Nothing was happening.
Her eyes flipped open, and she glanced around, nothing was happening, at all. As if in a trance, everything felt unusual, but she had felt that from the moment she had entered, there was no change. Perhaps it was more distinct now, but that was it. She turned to Sesshomaru, unhappy to face his certain disappointment, and even more so to realize that she was still trapped in Tenshik's body. She looked at him, smiled glumly, "Sesshomaru?" She whispered, "It didn't work..."
But he was looking at her with an utterly different expression than Kagome had expected. It was...shock. Confused, she asked, "Sesshomaru? Are you alright?" She looked down and realized in blushing surprise that she was holding his hands with both of hers, and peeked up at him questioningly.
His only answer was, "Tenshik..."
***
"Sesshomaru, my love, words cannot express what it means to me to see you again... It's me, it's me..." She reached out to him with both hands, sliding them over his own gently.
"Tenshik..."
"Yes," she whispered, her golden hair cast on an unseen breeze as it swayed about her. The sacred light that she had carried with her always had returned, shining around her as a soft aura. Her green eyes sparkled, and shone. She was alive again, his Tenshik.
Tears were forming at the corners of her eyes, out of pure joy of seeing him again. She felt Kagome's spirit inside of her, cradled, and certainly afraid. Tenshik was pierced with sympathy, remembering how it had been with her when she had awakened to a world that couldn't hear or see her. 'Hush, I'm so sorry Kagome, I shall speak with you soon, I promise, but please, endure this torture just a little longer, I must speak with Sesshomaru, it is so important.'
"Tenshik," Sesshomaru was almost trembling, to see her like this again, "Why have you done this? Why have you come? How-"
She faced him again, and cooed, "Hush beloved, there is no time. Now please," she gripped his hands tightly, "Tell me that you remember what I said to you when I died?"
He hesitated, "Why are you asking me?"
"Please love! Tell me that you remember!" Her voice was desperate.
"I don't understand but," he looked down, "Yes, I remember clearly. You told me that you would return, because your task had not been completed. Tenshik..."
"That's right," her voice was shaking with tears, "My task, I had to defeat the evil. The terrible evil, it destroyed me once, it shall not do it again..." She was mumbling more to herself then Sesshomaru, gentle face suddenly full of quiet rage. It was unfitting for her features.
He cupped her cheek with his hand, "What is this evil that you sense?"
"You call, it Naraku, but it so much more then what you see..."
He relaxed, his love was saying such strange things, but he was suddenly in familiar territory. "Naraku? Yes, we are already on the verge of destroying him, do not worry..."
She gripped his shoulders, "But you do not understand! It, he is more then that! He is so much more! He is a vortex, he is drawing everything in!"
His face became stern, and sad at the same time, "Tenshik, we will destroy him, the girl is already powerful enough. Please, rest, let your soul be at peace, and abandon her, because your presence is tearing her apart." It was tearing at his heart to have to say these things to the one that he had wished for so long to be at his side again, but she was so frantic now, that it seemed that this couldn't possibly be his calm Tenshik.
"No, Sesshomaru, there is more than that as well, I told you that I would return..."
He suddenly understood her words, and almost laughed. If this were truly Tenshik, then she must have suffered under delusion for many nights, to believe herself now. "Are you saying that this girl is your reincarnation?" His tone was almost openly mocking, "She is the reincarnation of another, you cannot be-"
"No! That is not true! She is not! I am telling you, despite the similarities, this girl is not who you think she is! She is not even a reincarnation, she is me...We are the same soul and mind, and heart, it is different then the art of reincarnation, she is me."
The laughter had left Sesshomaru's voice, and he held Tenshik's shoulders firmly. "That is not possible."
"It is under these circumstances! So great is the need for me to terminate this evil that my soul was born again."
"Then why does she resist you? Why do you and the girl conflict within this body?" He was being sharp with her.
"It may seem like two souls, she is, I am tearing myself apart, because...It is the only answer that I can find. Possession was the only possible answer to me. I exist now as a separate entity, only so that I may speak with you of things past."
"If you were truly the same being, then you would have the memories that you had all the same, would you not?"
"Sesshomaru, please don't be suspicious of me, I could never hurt another, I am trying to ease this new form of mine into realization, so that we may completely be one, but it is difficult, I am stubborn now, fearful of past experiences with reincarnation and possession. When I finally allow it, I will remember everything, but it will take time..."
He drew her close to him, and tried once again to ease his dear one out of the falsehoods her soul had somehow created. "Tenshik, I do not even understand this evil that you speak of, how it isn't Naraku, how we will fail if you do not destroy it yourself," He held her tighter, "But all I can think of, is that you weren't finished with a task, this is true, but that task was to stay with me; Tenshik, I never had the chance to tell you, but forgive me, I shouldn't have abandoned you, I was blind."
"No my love, do not say such things, I-" She was cut off as she wilted to the ground, panting.
"Tenshik?" He knelt by her side.
"My time is short, I only had so much strength to return to you this way for even the shortest time. I cannot explain now, but I will soon enough, before you face him, and you will because I love you and I need you to be there, you will need to know what you are to fight against..." Her words were hurried.
"No, you cannot leave!" He embraced her even more tightly. It was all so confusing...was this even Tenshik, or a ghostly demon come to insult him?
"Sesshomaru, I will always be with you. I will just look a little different."
His disbeliefs were suddenly dispelled as he looked into her beautiful face, and saw the desperate plea there, the pain, and the frustration and agony of living alone...This was Tenshik.
"No!"
He wasn't looking at her directly, but he felt a strange force coursing through him, a changing power, it was sweeping over her body, and his. She was leaving him again...
Silence fell over the shrine again. He was shaking with anger that he had blind enough not to believe in her for that precious moment, and that he had lost her again.
A soft voice spoke from within his grasp, "Sesshomaru? I'm so sorry...She died with such cruelty, you have been through so much pain, I'm so sorry... But can you, maybe, let go of me now?"
***
Kagome was ready to cry, but the tears would not come. She screamed at him, called at him, but he was speaking incoherently, no matter what. Always, as if he were talking to a totally different person, and she had a safe guess as to who.
"Have you finally lost it Sesshomaru?! Tenshik is dead! Nothing happened!" He continued with his conversation.
"Sesshomaru." Kagome tried to sink to her knees in despair, but her hands were linked around Sesshomaru's, and she couldn't remove them.
She watched him, in blank silence. Not bothering to protest his behavior, not bothering to protest her own. Kagome felt herself, trapped, and she was suddenly filled with hopelessness.
A voice swept around her, distant, like it was coming across a great distance, "Hush," it said, "I'm so sorry Kagome, I shall speak with you soon, I promise, but please, endure this torture just a little longer, I must speak with Sesshomaru, it is so important."
She regained focus, "T-tenshik....? Is this real? Am I dreaming?" Kagome wanted to shake, wanted to scream, her eyes were glued to Sesshomaru and she moved at times only...when she felt...allowed.
"WHAT'S HAPPENING?!" Light streaked across her vision like bolts of lighting, white light, it raced across the everything in seconds, engulfing Kagome, and her whole world in blinding purity.
"Sesshomaru?" She called, once more timid and afraid, "Sesshomaru!" The light beamed at her from all sides, and Kagome flinched at it. Dimly, she realized that her form was visible against this light, and that she was moving with her own will. But that seemed the least of her worries now, as she was stranded in this odd world.
"He isn't here, it's just...us. Or, it's just you."
Kagome spun around, and saw a woman standing before her, she had golden hair, radiant emerald eyes, and was dressed in an elegant kimono. She was smiling apologetically at her. The light itself, seemed to shine from her form, but Kagome was not impressed. She raised an eyebrow and reached out to the woman without warning, picking up a lock of her hair and cradling it in the palm of her hand before letting it drop back into its original place. "So you're not a mirror then, Tenshik."
She nodded, "Hold your own hair this time Kagome, I think you'll be happy to see that its your own."
Kagome scooped up a few hairs and clutched it before her eyes. It was black, cool, comforting, shining black, like a raven's coat. She looked up at Tenshik for a moment, "C-can I cry now?"
"Yes. Cry."
Kagome crashed to her knees and broke into great sobs, face in her hands. Tenshik knelt down beside her and placed a soothing hand on her shoulder, patting her back comfortingly. "Shh, Kagome, you're alright now."
Tenshik's hand was damp as it moved across Kagome's back. She looked up, "Tenshik, you're crying too, do I, control you now?"
The woman shook her tear streaked face slowly, "Don't speak of control Kagome, neither of us controls the other, we are a single person."
But at these words, Kagome went still, looking at Tenshik like she brandishing a knife at her. Without warning then, she sprang to her feet and laughed bitterly, "You possessed me Tenshik, you possessed me, and I'll never forgive you!"
***
Yes, yes, I know, so many things left unanswered, I'm sorry. And it wasn't as long as last time, no, but a lot just happened, so I think I'll let you sit on it for a while. Next chapter should be out soon, I've been a bit busy lately, so it's a little hard to produce stuff quickly now. Bye then dewdrops! Thanx for waiting!
