Disclaimer: Haven't done one of these for a while. I still don't own Harry Potter and it is still a shame.
The room was dark and still. It was early, probably around 3am, Tonks guessed. She lay motionless in bed, not her bed she reminded herself, and listened to the sound of her own breathing. Was she alone? It was too dark for her to see if Remus lay beside her or not. Tonks considered reaching out but was embarrassed in case she touched something she shouldn't. Get real; you just slept with the guy!
"You still there?" she whispered. Remus must have been awake as he answered immediately.
"No."
Tonks gave a giggle, and was surprised when she felt his arm curl around her naked body. She felt skin on skin and blushed, though she was relieved that he couldn't see. Remus kissed her lightly on her shoulder and pulled her closer into a hug; a friendly hug, a brotherly hug. Tonks gave a cringe. What have we done! As if reading her very thoughts, Remus echoed her.
"What are we playing at?" he asked quietly, his voice filled with obvious regret. Tonks kept quiet for a moment, then realised she should at least attempt a reply.
"Well Mr Lupin, there are many names for what we've just done." He gave a light laugh and poked her in the ribs making her giggle again. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I joke when I'm uncomfortable."
Remus paused this time. Tonks felt him swallow.
"Are you uncomfortable?" he asked her after a while. Tonks indeed felt uncomfortable, even more so now he had asked. Instead, she chose to answer literally.
"No, you're bed is much more comfier than mine. Hell, I think even Buckbeak's bed is better!" Not feeling entirely satisfied with her answer, Remus just gave a little smile, which went unseen. The couple lay together in silence. Tonks could feel the man's rough stubble against her shoulder. She had never been one for facial hair, but she had to admit that it felt nice. She closed her eyes and lay there, listening to her friend breathing softly beside her. Remus thought she had fallen asleep again until she spoke once more.
"Remus…do you think I could put my clothes back on now?" He gave a nervous chuckle and she felt him nod.
"I was just about to ask the same thing."
"Oh… About me?"
"No, about myself."
Neither stirred for a moment, then Tonks decided to make the first move. She stood and felt around the dimly lit floor for her top and skimpy shorts. She heard Remus moving too, on the other side of the bed. He finished first and got back into bed. Tonks hesitated.
"Um…can I get back in?"
"Of course, just don't try anything," he joked and felt her weight return to his bed. She snuggled up to him again and lay still.
"Well…"
"Well…"
"Well…"
"Stop it Nymphadora."
"Sorry."
Remus had to grin. Here he was with an incredibly beautiful witch lying beside him, which he had to admit didn't happen often, and all they could do was joke around like old mates. That's because you are old mates! he told himself.
"You're my best friend," he blurted out without meaning to. Tonks squirmed around to face him, squinting in the weak light.
"You're my best friend too, Remus. I really hope I haven't fucked things up, if you'll excuse the pun." He kissed her on the forehead.
"No, of course not."
"Am I really you're best friend?" she asked, his revelation only just registering.
"Yes. I've been denying it for a while now, but the truth is that you Nymphadora Tonks are my best friend…I only hope Sirius would approve of his replacement. I don't doubt that he would." Tonks swallowed hard at the thought of her cousin. She knew Remus was still grieving, and he didn't mention Sirius often.
"What do you think Sirius would say if he found out about this?" Tonks asked.
"He'd probably beat me up," Remus admitted casually.
"He wants you to be happy Remus," Tonks told the man. "He told me to tell you to stop moping because you're pissing him off." Remus didn't react and Tonks worried that she'd upset him.
"When did he tell you this?"
"In the hospital," she replied simply. He gave a sigh.
"He's right, I really should stop moping. It's just… I feel guilty when I'm happy, or when I realise that I haven't thought about him for a while, you know?" Tonks gave a nod. "I hope he's happy, wherever he is," Remus finished sadly.
"I'm sure he is. You know, he's probably watching us right now. Pervy bastard," Tonks mumbled. Remus gave a snigger of a laugh then yawned.
"You know what Dora, you're probably right."
Tonks woke midmorning to find the other side of the bed empty. She ran her hand through her natural dark hair (when had it changed?) and morphed it to her trademark pink spikes. Having found the energy to get out of bed, she made her way down to the kitchen where she found Kingsley Shacklebolt and Mad-Eye Moody talking quietly together. Both men looked up as she entered.
"Morning Tonks, didn't know you were in," Kingsley said, offering a smile. The witch returned it briefly, and then her eyes fell on Moody. She opened her mouth to talk but he cut her off.
"Now then girl, don't feel you have to explain yourself to me. I know what's going on. I also know how hard Kingsley here is working to save your backside. So I hope you're grateful," he finished casually. Tonks nodded quickly.
"I am, Moody. I really am." She smiled at Kingsley again and went to pour herself some tea. The two Auror continued their conversation. When they paused, Tonks decided to interject.
"Where's Remus?" she asked, trying to sound as casual as she could.
"Dumbledore had something for him to take care of. He didn't really specify, only caught him leaving as we arrived," Kingsley told her.
"When do you think he'll be back?"
"I don't know Tonks, I'm not his bloody minder. Later this afternoon I should think." Tonks nodded, satisfied with Kingsley's answer.
But Remus didn't return that afternoon. The day passed slowly and Tonks wished she didn't feel so worried. He'll be fine; he can take care of himself. You don't even know what he's up to. It's probably nothing. It was late evening before Tonks heard the front door shut to. The winter sun had set hours ago. Tonks was incredibly tired but refused to go to bed until she knew Remus was home safe. She rose as he entered the kitchen. He looked tired, she noticed.
"Wotcher. Where have you been?" Her tone was not demanding but enquiring.
"Scotland," he replied simply, kissing her gently on the top of her head before heading for the kettle.
"Scotland?"
"Yes," he affirmed in such a tone that Tonks knew not to press it any further. "And I can tell you it's bloody freezing up there," he added as he sat opposite her at the long wooden table. There was a gap of silence between them, then
"Look," they said together. "You first. No, you." Remus laughed in resignation.
"Fine, I'll go first." He looked at his hands uncomfortably and took a deep breath. "You see, the thing is…last night … it shouldn't have happened and I'm so sorry that it did, not that it wasn't great or anything but it was a mistake and –"
"Remus, you're rambling." He took another deep breath at his friend's words.
"I hope I haven't upset you Nymphadora, that wasn't my intention at all. I don't know what came over me; I blame those tiny little shorts of yours to be honest. And Harry, in fact this is all his fault. Yes let's blame him." Tonks laughed lightly.
"Why are we blaming Harry exactly?" Remus froze, not really wanting to divulge his conversation with the boy. He shook his head dismissively.
"You must hate me," he muttered. It was her turn to shake her head. She reached across the table and took both his hands in hers.
"Of course not, you silly man. I feel exactly the same."
"You do?"
"Yes," she laughed. "Last night was great an' all but I don't really want to screw up our friendship. I like the way things are between us. I wouldn't change it for anything. Besides, I was kinda depressed about the whole 'Charlie' thing, so I guess you should be the one hating me. I shouldn't have used you like that."
"Ahh so that explains it. Why else would an incredibly beautiful young witch fall for an old werewolf like me?" She gave a laugh.
"Exactly!" Then her face became serious. "You are a great man Remus Lupin, and I don't deserve to have you as a friend." He brought one of her hands up to his lips and kissed it lightly.
"I know, I tell myself that every day," he joked. They sat quietly for a while, discussing Order business and wondering how Harry was getting on having Snape for two subjects that week.
"So, Scotland…" Tonks prompted after a while. Remus gave a little smirk from behind his mug of tea.
"I knew it wouldn't be long until you brought that up again."
"I'm a curious gal. What were you up to?" Remus lowered his mug.
"Digging for dirt on Lady Thompson," he admitted. Tonks had forgotten all about the female werewolf. Her mouth fell in surprise.
"Oh right. You find anything?" Remus shook his head slightly.
"No, but I didn't expect to. Her pack was rather secretive, wanted to keep themselves to themselves. Apparently Dumbledore is speaking to Lady this week. That reminds me, before I forget, he wants to see us both next Monday." Tonks frowned slightly.
"Wonder what he wants."
"Probably knows we've been up to something we shouldn't," Remus teased with a wink. "That man knows everything."
"Hopefully not everything!" Tonks cringed at the thought. "Guess we'll find out what he wants soon enough. I'll be back to work by then anyway so it's not as if I'll have to go out of my way." Remus looked disheartened at this. He hated living at Grimmauld Place by himself.
"We'll see," he said quietly.
"Remus, I feel fine," Tonks told him. She truly meant it too. Tonks was still on her Healing Potion twice a day, which helped a great deal. Sure, she was still suffering emotionally; at night time it was the worst. She hoped that being back at work might help her to move on and put the past behind her.
"You should go to bed, you look shattered," Remus was saying.
"Speak for yourself," she retorted with a grin. "Fine, fine I'm off. Night then." She rose from her seat, walked around the table to kiss him on the cheek, and then headed up the stairs to bed.
When Remus decided to call it a night himself, he made his way slowly up to his room. As her reached the drawing room landing he stopped. Peering through the gap of the drawing room door he saw the outline of a person asleep on the sofa. He crossed the room to see Tonks fast asleep, her chest rising and falling gently with each steady breath. A thin fraying blanket covered her. Remus smiled to himself and bent down to kiss her cheek. He carefully raised her to give enough room for him to sit down, and then lowered her shoulders back down in his lap. Stroking her pink hair softly, he whispered to her, "You silly girl," before he closed his eyes and joined her in sleep.
A/N: Sorry I've been taking so long, I'm working on two assignments at the mo but they're nearly done. I know this chapter was a tad tedious, but such is life. I'll update soon-ish. :)
