A/N: Hey 2nd chapter! Ummm...be warned. I used the F word a lot int his chapter OO silly, silly Cappie.Oh, andQueenAkasha: I PUT TWIGS IN THIS ONE, JUST FOR YOU!anyways, please enjoy.
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Rambo dispatched of the last few bandits and smirked gleefully to himself as he straightened from his fighting posture. The man on the boat was stroking his chin and "hmmm"ing to himself, his eyes narrowing as he stared at the monk. Quite suddenly, the man on the boat became the victim to a spasm, his arms and legs twitching in one convulsive…twitch. The man tried to smooth it over, however, and began to waltz, trying to make it seem as if it had all been intentional.
"You are better than I thought!" the man yelled, circling around the mast and coming back to stand once more in the middle of the boat, "Well, I suppose I should just kill you, but say, let's make it more fun and see how you do against these undead monster…thingys!" he finished, spreading his arms out at his side and mumbling some mystic mumbo jumbo as he floated into the air. Bright light engulfed the man as he continued his chanting, Rambo looking on with horror as ghosts popped up from the ground.
"What….the fuck…" Rambo mumbled, wondering where this whole plot to destroy the village was going, and, more importantly, where it was coming from.
Dawn Star sneered and began to fight, her long sword cleaving a ghost in two…though how that is possible, I will not say. Rambo began to fight as well, this time clearly vexed that he couldn't just kill the man on the boat and be done with it instead of fighting all of these lackeys.
"snap!" Rambo gasped and looked down as he felt something snap under his boot, wondering what in the hell it could be. "Probably a bone…" he thought grimly to himself, but lifted his foot to find a small twig broken in two laying there. It looked quite put out that it had been snapped, and Rambo almost felt sorry for it before he was brought back to reality by a ghostly pair of claws raking through the air near his head. How the ghosts were solid enough to inflict damage but could still pop out of the ground like there was nothing to it, Rambo didn't know. Apparently, ghosts in the Jade Empire were of a different breed…
Once they were through with the ghosts, Rambo and Dawn Star stood side-by-side as they stared at the man on the boat, who was now almost in tears.
"You…killed them!" he screeched, making the almost existent hair on the back of Rambo's neck stand on end, "Now you'll pay! You'll see…you'll all see!" he finished, drying his tears with a rather lovely handkerchief before standing up and disappearing, only to reappear before the pair of companions. "You…you're better than I thought," the man sniffled, clearly attempting to keep his tears at bay.
"Ya, you said that," Rambo said, unsheathing Fortune's Favorite and readying himself for the fight. The man snapped his gaze back over Rambo and prepared himself for the upcoming battle as well, slightly arching his back and taking a few steps away from the monk.
"RANDOM EXPLOSION!" permeated the air that was thick with anticipation, making all three of the warriors turn around and stare as the ship the man had been previously standing on broke in two and sunk to the depths of the…well, not really. It actually just sat there because apparently the water was shallow. Though how he was planning on getting the boat back out to sea, no one really knows…
An old man hopped out from the wreckage, smiling to himself as he slowly walked over to Rambo.
"Eh heh heh…" he cackled, clapping Rambo on the shoulder and smiling at Dawn Star in turn.
"Um…Master Li? What the fuck…? You just exploded a whole fucking ship," Rambo said, raising an eyebrow and watching as his Master turned around to see the other man, who now had his arms crossed over his chest and was tapping a foot impatiently.
"HYAAAH!" Master Li screamed, jumping back a few feet and raising one of his legs in an awesome 'hey! Let's all pretend to be ninjas!' stance (A/N: come on, you all know what I'm talking about). "You shall not kill my pupils, Assassin," he growled, becoming serious in .21 seconds. The other man chortled before turning around to face Master Li, trying to find something witty and dashing to say in return. He hadn't the chance, however, before Li punched him a few times…once in the stomach, once in the chest, and once in the face. Apparently, that is enough to kill you, as the Assassin was dead as a dormouse. Master Li shoved his hands into his sleeves and turned to face Rambo, who was poking the dead Assassin with a twig. Could that really have killed the man?
"Stop it! That's disgusting!" Master Li whined, grabbing the twig from Rambo's hands and snapping it in two. Rambo puffed out his lower lip and narrowed his eyes at his Master, backing away from the corpse to stand next to Dawn Star once more. "Good," Li continued, smiling warmly at his two students, "Now I shall be very vague and tell you to talk to Dawn Star. Talk to Dawn Star about the ghosts then come meet with me in my oh so humble abode. See ya later!" the old man finished, turning to skip down the dirt path that led back to Two Rivers. Rambo raised his eyebrows and turned to Dawn Star, who just sighed and shook her head. The monk nodded, figuring that she would be useless anyway…females always were…
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Once Rambo made his way back to the village, he slowly walked to the Masters home, finding to his astonishment that there was a small gathering outside.
"Hey Masta Li. Havin' a party?" Rambo asked, knowing that his strange Master could sometimes be quite the party animal. Master Li turned around to reply, but was cut off by a loud yell.
"YAAAAHHH!" Gao screamed, pointing an accusing finger at Rambo before he launched himself off of the steps he had been standing on, aiming right for Rambo.
"AHHHH!" Rambo yelled, running to the side so that Gao flew past him and crashed right into the fence that surrounded the fighting area. Gao picked himself up from the wreckage that used to be a very nice wooden fence and pointed his finger once again at Rambo.
"I challenge thee to a duel!" he screeched, attempting to straighten his…robe…with his other hand.
"Uhh…sure." Rambo said, dismissing his strange rival with a wave of his hand.
"No! Seriously, Rambo! I challenge you to a duel! Come oooonnnn!" Gao whined, pawing at the top student's robes as he pleaded with the agitated monk.
"GAO YOU FRIGGIN IJIT!" Master Li yelled, running past Rambo and kicking Gao the Lesser in the shins, "You know as well as everybody else that duels are…umm…UNNECISARY!" He finished, watching with satisfaction as tears filled Gao's eyes.
"…ow..." he whimpered, the tears spilling out onto his cheeks. The Lesser then plopped onto the ground and nursed his shins, as they were now turning black and blue from his cruel Master's punishment.
"Nah, it's cool, Master Li," Rambo said, walking past the vehement old kook and grabbing Gao by his arm. "Let's go, Gao the Insignificant." Rambo sighed, dragging the other man into the arena.
"Hey!" he huffed, turning around to face his long time rival, "It's Gao the LESSER not Gao the INSIGNIFICANT!"
"They pretty much mean the same thing, fuck 'tard." Rambo replied, smiling wickedly to himself. Oh, he was just too evil.
"Grr…!" Gao growled, readying himself for the fight.
"Kick!" Rambo yelled as he kicked the other man in the face, watching as Gao bent over, cradling his face in his hands.
"OWW! YOU BROKE MY NOSE, I SWEAR!" Gao cried, plopping down on the ground once again to tell the ants who were running away to their anthill what had happened.
"This Fight Is Finished!" Master Li said, walking extremely slowly into the arena. "The winner is…..RAMBO!" Rambo bowed to the people who had come to watch the fight, basking in the people's cheers.
"Yeah? You think so?" Gao whispered, bending down closely to the ground.
"Gao, what the hell are you doing?" Rambo asked the man who had distracted him from all the praise he was receiving.
"Well, I'm not sure. The ants tell me to kill you but I think that would be just plain mean. Maybe I should get a second opinion from the egrets who live next door…" Gao mused, stroking his chin thoughtfully.
"…wow," Rambo said, simply staring at the other man, "Just…wow." Gao's face twisted unattractively as he thought about the implications behind Rambo's statement.
"Wow what? Wow that I'm stupid? You think I'm stupid, don't you?" Gao yelled, jumping up from the ground and getting into a fighting stance again.
"Yup!" Rambo chirped, nodding his head exuberantly.
"That's it!" Gao then blasted some sort of energy thing that Rambo didn't know what the hell was at him. Rambo sighed and put up his shield, preparing to block the attack, but dropped his guard out of surprise when his old master jumped in front of him. The old man blocked the attack, then ran across the yard and close-lined Gao with his sleeve.
"GAO YOU ARE IN BIG TROUBLE!" Li yelled, putting his hands on his hips and glaring down at the man who had been knocked to the ground twice already that day, "GO TO YOUR ROOM!" he finished, pointing to a large building that was behind Gao. Gao sighed and drooped his head as he picked himself up from the ground.
"Yeah, yeah…" He mumbled, taking one last moment to glare over his shoulder at the very confused monk.
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A/N: Ja. Umm...that's it, for this chapter anyway.
